for jenny, from the drabble tag. ;) merry christmas, love. i love you so much.

character: squib!james

prompt: well, sometimes it's a bit lonely.


"James?" Lily asks, leaning on his doorway in a slightly flirtatious pose that she's picked up from some muggle movie. No, he reprimands his thoughts. You can't call them muggles anymore, you're one of them.

"Yeah?" he asks, looking up from where he's tuning his guitar (which never seems to be tuned properly- even though he plays it as though it's attached to him). "What is it?"

She flips her hair (he reminds himself to tell Molly not to leave Mean Girls at their house again) and puts a hand on her hip. "No need to get sassy," she says in a tone that says she's quoting an idol. He doesn't point out that he's not being 'sassy' or whatever, because that might incite the dreaded 'duh, James, I was being ironic.' "I was just wondering if you were okay. Since you're a squib and all."

If she weren't his sister, and that wasn't just how she talked, he'd probably have gotten annoyed. Instead he just twists the machine head and plucks a chord. Damn. Still flat. "I'm cool, I guess," he says without looking up. It's better that he doesn't see the pitying look in her hazel eyes.

"No you're not," she says impatiently. "I know you're not, because if my eleventh birthday came and went and I still didn't have magic, I'd be pissed as hell."

"Language, Lily."

"Whatever," she says waspishly, flicking a hand and rolling her eyes. (Really, he might just kill Molly). "Talk to me, Jamie, are you really alright?"

After a few peaceful moments only interrupted by E chords, he ignores the fact that he's about to dump his problems on his (surprisingly mature) eight year old sister and opens his mouth. "Well, sometimes it's kind of lonely. Knowing that the other kids my age are going to Hogwarts and I'm not."

She snorts. "That's it, Jamie? Hell, that could be the same situation as some poor bloke who finds out he's only been accepted to Durmstrang, not Hogwarts. Sheesh. You're not really that simple-minded, are you?"

Starting to feel a little sheepish and stupid, he shrugs. "I guess. I can't really think of any other reasons. I mean, not being able to do magic kind of sucks, but I'll get used to that. I just hate the idea of everyone else thinking I'm some sort of loser."

She crosses the room in a few simple strides and sits down next to him, her eyes sympathetic but fierce. "James, if any of them think you're a loser, they'll have hell to pay when I get to Hogwarts." He laughs a bit, but somehow the worried look in his eyes hasn't left, (or at least, that's what he assumes.) "Look, Jamie, if you really care that much about going to Hogwarts, I can convince Mum and Dad to let you come when Al goes off to be a nerdy Ravenclaw next year. Hell, I'll make them pretend you've been going for the past year. Just stop moping, okay?"

He opens his mouth to tell her that he hasn't been moping, he's been practicing, but she just jumps up and shouts something about Teddy coming. "Thanks, Lily," he mutters and goes back to tuning his guitar (and somehow he feels slightly better). Lily always manages to make him feel better about things he doesn't know he's feeling bad about.