-In which, what Madara couldn't accomplish could be done by two little babies

So! I'm back to this story after an eleven month's absence—it was supposed to be six months but I got writer's block as you will see in this chapter—sorry for that. I really couldn't think of anything for this story. Plus, AP Biology totally killed my creativity and free time, but hopefully you guys like this chapter (I seriously doubt it, though).

PS. Sakura has a lot of speaking parts in this, so if there's bolded words but no baby words before it then that's Sakura speaking since I got lazy in typing out the baby talk.

Again, I'm sorry for this crappy chapter! I just needed to update something to show you guys I'm not dead!

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❤❀~Chapter Four~❀❤

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The smell was hor-ri-ble! Little Baby Sasuke did not understand how Baby Sakura could just sit there and ignore this godawful stench! It was absolute murder to his sensitive itsy-bitsy nose! It just couldn't be sake! It just couldn't be! And if it was then he vowed that he would never ever have even a sip of that disgusting fermented rice wine!

"Yaya~! You know, Uchiha . . . heh, even as a little toddler," slurred a drunken Tsunade whose l's came out as r's and whose t's and d's were switched, "your countenance is still just as bad~yea! You sure pick up the real bad traits of your clan quickly~!"

Now, had Sasuke been his real age then he might have stung the Hokage with his Chidori Nagashi. However, as it was, he was reduced to a useless infant/toddler person-thing, and so he could do nothing but glare at the wasted lady. And glare, he did.

"Goo souutn' gwal, saa-uu-k," You shouldn't glare, Sasuke-kun. Baby Sakura said as she took the calligraphy brush and dipped it into ink. "Do sumthring pudokdiv." Do something productive.

"Tch, and what are you doing?" Yes, Sasuke could talk in full sentences. He just chose not to in front of watching people, not wanting them to hear his little lisp. And since Tsunade was drunk, he decided that he would talk in full adult sentences. (What a smart evil Uchiha baby.)

"Sumthring pudokdiv." Something productive. "Siu?" See? And little Baby Sakura held up the papers she had written on.

By decree of Fifth Hokage Tsunade of the Senju clan, the paper had started, I declare that every shinobi must get their physical checkup by the end of this month. If any shinobi decides not to follow my decree then there will be reparations made. Appointments must be made by the end of this week and must be followed through or any shinobi found not following this law shall be...

"Ay deen't tjwink ov ahni arseh kon-cee-kwences yit, bot Ay vill." I didn't think of any harsh consequences yet, but I will.

"And why would you do this?"

"How else would the village still be standing? Shisou's drunk half of the time, so either Shizune or I will write up the new decrees. Imagine what would happen if Tsunade wrote decrees when drunk. Ugh."

And suddenly, Sasuke had a great idea. He took the brush right out of Baby Sakura's chubby infant hands and began forging Tsunade's handwriting on a new piece of paper.

Note to self: never let Naruto lead another mission again.

"Goo noow..." You know... "Dekneekari, ik yas't Naaludo'z hult." Technically, it wasn't Naruto's fault.

"Are you trying to say something?"

The pink-haired baby said nothing more.


"It's nothing, just... I remember very clearly that it was a boy hell-bent on revenge that caused us to get where we are right now."

". . . Are you trying to imply something?"

"No... How about I get us some tomatoes?"


"Hey, do you know that, ever since we've turned into babies, you've been using my name more and more?"

". . . Is that supposed to be relevant?"

"It depends. Did I distract you long enough that you now have forgotten that I was implying an insult directly at you?"

"Haruno Sakura, if you don't stop trying to change the subject, I'll—"

"You know what? I'm kinda thirsty." And little baby Sakura reached for the bottle next to her sleeping drunk mentor.

"Wait, Sakura, that's—"

But the toddler Uchiha's warnings came too late because little Sakura took a giant gulp of the liquid inside and started hiccuping.


And almost as if that word was magic, Sakura's hiccuping got even worse, and her little infant baby started convulsing in an almost jump-like manner.

"I *hic* don't *hic* feel so *hic* good..."

"Of course, you wouldn't feel good, you annoying girl! You just drank alcohol as a baby!"

"Don't *hic* yell at *hic* me!" And now baby Sakura was crying and hiccuping and hopping at the same time. And speaking of her hopping, with each hiccup, the little pink-haired baby got higher and higher off her mentor's desk. And with a giant hiccup, Sakura was flying off the wooden table. Luckily, she hadn't lost too much of her ninja skills and grabbed a hold of the chandelier. "Sasuke-kun! *hic* Get me *hic* down! *hic* I'm *hic* scared of *hic* heights!"

"Oh, crap!" Little Sasuke ran as fast as his stubby little legs would take him. If Sakura fell onto the floor as she was now . . . well, let's just say it wouldn't be anything less than scattered baby brains on the floor.

"Oh my god! Lady Tsunade!"

And fortunately for them, Shizune opened the door to the office then and saw the disaster that was to play out. Oh, why did she ever think it was a good idea to leave two shinobi-turned-infants with Konoha's alcoholic of a Hokage? Oh God have mercy...

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Done with this chapter, though it's not really all that funny... It's really baby this time. Um...someone give me ideas, please?