It happened again, I couldn't believe Moose, he promise me, fine maybe he didn't promise but still he make me change my plans. I couldn't believe how easy I accepted anything he propose, I should have gone to the Halloween party with Kirstin. Here I am in his room waiting for him, all my friends long gone and the scene with Moose saying that he was born to be the Mary Kate to my Ashley replaying on my mind over and over again. He was my best friend but now sitting in his desk waiting for him I finally accepted reality he may said that he is my best friend too but it isn't true I wasn't as important in his live as he was in mine. Hours pass I felt asleep and suddenly I felt him near me I open my eyes and saw him there standing with a worry face, I was so mad at him or at least I hoped that this feeling was anger but in the end I knew that I wasn't mad at him I was sad even disappointed in myself for waiting. Sure Moose try to apologize but I wouldn't allow him until he said it, he had been dancing all this time but something appear to have gone bad and now it was over, now he would confess everything and try to apologize and I just couldn't take it and walk away.
My first thought was to go to the party and try to save the night maybe some dancing with my friends, real friends that show up, will do me some good. Finally I decided against it I couldn't face the questions when I arrive alone, sure my friends will drop the subject but I would't have a good time all the dancing around will only remind me of Moose. I change my clothes and sit on my bed, what to do? If I was a girly girl I would just sit here eating sweets and crying, shame I wasn't a girly girl although the crying and the sweets where appealing. In other occasions I would just dance like I used to do when I was little with my brother, oh Tyler I miss him so much, he would go and punch Moose for making me sad. Then I realize something I hadn't talk to Tyler in over a month I pick up my cell and press 2 it rang five times before going to voicemail. Well that didn't work, I was going stand to go find sweets when the cell rang and Tyler's pic appear, I ran to pick it up and I could hear him saying... "Hey sorry i didn't pick it up i thought it was a dream, you know you calling i was sure i was hallucinating until Nora yell at me haha".
I just laugh he was always so funny.."Sorry i have been so out of touch but NYU is crazy i can't believe the amount of work…".
"Sure sure, just admit you forget about your awesome brother and ill understand"
We talk for 10 more minutes until he suggested Skype and then we Skype for hours, Nora push him away of the computer to ask me about Moose but stop the second she saw my eyes grew sad. Tyler pick up on it and was about to ask me something but Nora change the subject about how amazing tour was going and how they were going to stop in Seattle for the summer. They both ask me to go visit them in Seattle but didn't press for an answer right away.
The next day i was awake by the sound of my cell, what kind of person would ring me in the middle of the night, well 9 am but still it was early, I have to admit that i wasn't surprise when i saw the picture of Nora flashing on my phone. At first i wasn't going to admit to any trouble between me and Moose but i think i was still a little sensible because she barely finish asking me before i poor my heart out, here i was in my pjs with a sleeping roommate in the next bed admitting my feelings about him while crying. This is so weird in me that Nora was shock and was silent for the majority of the conversation. Finally i stop crying and Nora told me that i had to decide if i wanted to be more to Moose, because my only option was to confess my feelings to him. The conversation ended with me agreeing to go to Seattle with them for a few days over the summer.
A couple of days pass with me avoiding Moose or him ignoring me I'm not sure, but i used this time to get to know more classmates sure there was no one like him but still i was content, also i finish packing all my things to move out of the dorm and send them to seattle to Tyler and Nora's house. Finally Moose call and once again i went to meet him just like he ask me. That afternoon was magical we dance in the streets and i told him to continue dancing, maybe if i give him a push just maybe i would still be part of his life. I trained with the pirates and got to know all the crew and i got it they were amazing no wonder why Moose was ditching me so many times. Jacob was my favorite pirate he make me feel at home I've always felt inadequate dancing next to Moose but he made me feel secure. Needless to say the pirates won the World Jam, later Luke and Nathalie where going away to California and even though i was ok with Moose i decided to go to Seattle the same day. After going with him to his NYU interview i told him i would catch up with him at the station and went to my dorm and pick my backpack.
After saying our goodbyes to Luke and Nathalie i turn to the pirates and started to say my goodbyes, Jacob was the only one who knew i was leaving that day so the rest of them including Moose were shock. Moose ask for an explanation but i just told him i miss Tyler and that i would see him before the end of summer. Once i board the train i started to miss him so much but there was something in me telling me that this was the best for me and for once i put myself before him. I ended up spending all summer with Tyler and Nora, first in Seattle and then traveling to all the places we used to talk about when Ty and I were kids, Nora just laugh at how excited we got every time we got to take a picture of a place we dreamed to go. Moose and I texted over the summer i usually miss his calls because being in the road i forgot to charge my phone. Finally one night back in Seattle a week before the end of summer i was on my laptop when Moose Skype me i was shock i didn't even blink before pressing star call.
The moment his face appear on the screen i felt like crying i hadn't realize how much i miss him until that moment, sure i thought about him everyday but still just seeing him made me realize I just couldn't be completely happy without him in my life. He also seem excited to see me and ask me when i was coming back and reminded me that i promise to be back before the end of summer, suddenly i heard noises and pay attention to more than his face and notice he was at the vault and the santiago twins appear on the screen. They start to talk to me and i felt like telling them to go away and put Moose back but i didn't have to because a minute after he was telling them to go away. Then Jacob appear on the background he ask Moose to say hi to me i don't know why but i ask Moose to call Jacob so he could be in the conversation and to my surprise he said no, he wanted to talk to me alone.
For 2 hours he ask me questions about my summer and i show him pictures and got excited while he only nod and smile. This was so weird i usually was the one nodding but i think for once Moose wasn't the one with the adventures. He told me about his summer it seem he went home until a week ago and now he was back, he already move into his dorm but decided to live with the pirates until classes started. Also it seems that there was a bed or a space at least with my name on the vault and a choreography for me to learn and at that precise moment i didn't feel like going back.
Suddenly Tyler surprise me, just when Moose was asking the day of my arrival Tyler came in pick me up and started to walk out of the room so i just shout a bye to Moose while tyler went back and close my laptop, it seems it was time for dinner. The last week of summer flew by, i lost my charger so until the night before leaving i didn't have my phone, after i charger i turned it on. I had 30 texts unread, 28 where from Moose asking me when i was coming back, 1 from Tyler mocking me about loosing my charger and to my surprise 1 from Jacob offering me his service to pick me up when i came back. So i shoot a text to Moose and Jacob telling them i was coming back tomorrow and that i appreciate them picking me up. Literally a second later my phone rang and it was Moose so i told him about my missing charger and that i will see him tomorrow because i needed to finish packing.
So again i was in this train now going back to NY and i started to think about my summer, i had an awesome time with Tyler and Nora i met some new friends that live near them and travel to places i always dreamed about. I miss Moose but came to the conclusion that if he needed more time without me i was ok with that, I had already call Kirstin and the rest of my friends form NYU and we were supposed to meet the next day to catch up and i was excited about seeing them. I was going to move with Kirstin to an apartment outside the dorms so i was excited to see my new home too.
The moment i step out of the train i was run down by a very excited Moose and engulf in a hug so tight i thought i was going to die of oxygen depravation still i wouldn't change it for anything and hug him back as tight as i could manage. Jacob came near us and took my backup i manage to say hi to him. Moose put his arm around my shoulder and started to tell me how excited he was of me coming back, to say that i was happy would be an understatement i was flying. They took me to the vault where al the pirates welcome me back, we all dance and eat until the next day and Moose was always by my side.
Once again i was awake by the sound of my cell, what is it with people and waking me up like this. I pick it up as fast as i could not wanting to disturb the pirates that were all over the vault sleeping. It was Kirstin asking me if i was on my way, i felt really bad about oversleeping and told her that i was now. I look for my backpack, change and was out of the vault in less than 5 minutes. I found my friends all talking and laughing in the park where we meeting and start telling them about my summer when a text from Moose wondering where I was arrive I just text him back saying that i was out with friends before once again my battery die. The rest of the day was spend walking, eating all over NY it felt good to be back i miss my friends i usually focus so much on Moose that i forget i have other people in my life.
We decided to go back to the apartment and i recluded all of them to help me unpack the next day so i was in for great start of the next day was almost uneventful my things came, my friends help me and after everything was done we went for a pizza. On my way back to my dorm i saw Moose wondering around my building and when he saw he had seem happy and angry at the same time, i have to admit all over the years i known him i haven't seen that look more than twice so i was worry. He came near me and told me that we needed to talk so i said goodbye to my friends and show him to my new apartment with Kirstin. Finally i ask him what was wrong.
"Ok Moose i know something is wrong did something happened at the vault?"
"No, nothing happened there. I want to talk to you about us. Remember last semester when you told me you miss me, you felt like you were not important in my life anymore."
I just nod, i remember everything perfectly.
"Well now I'm feeling like that, you went away all summer and we barely talk, now you come back and spend an afternoon with me and then you just go out for two days with not even a call to invite me. Are you still mad with me Cam?"
Wow, i didn't see this coming i thought i was being a good friend to Moose by giving him his space, sure i have admit that it felt good to meet new people and feel part of something on my own but i never meant to leave him outside my life. "No Moose i told you i was never angry at you, i think i just wanted to give you some space to do your things and.."
"Cam i don't want space, i want us to hang out like we used too, i miss us."
At that point i just hug him tight and he return the hug, we spend the rest of the night just talking an goofing around, he told me about the summer and i'd admit i was very happy to hear that he had focus on dancing and there wasn't any new girl in his life.
The next day classes started so we woke up early and went our separates ways not before promising to have lunch together. My classes went great i had picked good professor and i already had friends and study groups for all of them and went lunch time came i went to meet my best friend, who was waiting for me in the cafeteria. It seems his classes when ok but he was more excited for dance classes he had later that day.
The first 2 weeks went by so fast, Moose and I texted each other everyday and sometimes made time to have lunch or eat dinner together, I miss him but like i said he needed his space and so do I. One day i was studying with my friends on the library when suddenly he came running and ask me to follow him outside, i was so happy to see him that i didn't hesitate to go out. He started to jump and told me that he had a showcase in a month and his partner a girl call Veronica was amazing. Great a girl Veronica that dance and is amazing is going to spend a lot of time with him, well that made my day. He then told me that he was going to be really busy so we will have to stop our little outings but that i should come and see him practice so i get to meet amazing veronica.
Then he went away running because it was getting late to meet veronica, after that i just couldn't go back to study i needed to talk to someone, i needed to scream at moose and i need to..i needed to dance. And thats how i ended up in the speaker room at the vault dancing like crazy with Jacob and Anala. Even though i hadn't came back to the vault since i came back from vacations the pirates were really excited to see me, at first they all join us at the speaker room but as it was getting late they left. It was monday so today the club was close, then Jacob turn off the music and i found myself been stare down by him and Anala and then the moment when they ask why i was there arrived and once again i spill everything out.
After that they only said that Moose was really slow like most guys and that this Veronica girl wasn't a threat at all. I'll admit that this made me feel better I call Kirstin to let her know i was spending the night at the vault and continue to spend some much needed pirate style quality time. The month flew by and the only time i attempt to go see Moose rehearse I met Veronica who informed me that she prefer for there rehearsals to be secret so i said my goodbyes wish them luck and left. That moth was extremely busy for me so thats probably why I didn't notice the lack of text and the 0 calls from by bff.
The day of the showcase Ty and Nora were on NY for a show so they came with me, we saw the pirates in the audience i introduce them, they were really excited to meet Ty and Nora. The show was amazing, Moose always shines when he is dancing but the night turn ugly when later we were waiting for him and that girl to come out after the show. One moment they were saying hi to us and being congratulated and the next Veronica took Moose's hand and said that her parents were waiting for them so they had to go. My heart broke he actually went along with her, sure Moose never contradict his girlfriends. I could feel all the pirates going quite after that and Ty and Jacob looking at Moose like they were going to punch him, still i don't get why they didn't, fine i know Nora and Anala where holding them down still they could have done it.
I spend that weekend with Ty and Nora showing them NY, and Ty would say how much he liked for me to transfer to Seattle. After they went away i went to my apartment and cry myself to sleep i woke up to Kirstin holding me i had forgot that she came in the middle of the night and told me that Moose sucked. Talking about him i haven't heard about him after the day of the showcase, i decided to move on i woke Kirstin up and thank her for last night and invite her to eat breakfast. Almost two weeks pass and not a word of my so called bf at this point i was over it, sure i was crash but i decided that if i was not that important to him well same here pal.
I went along with the semester with some text from Moose wondering how i was, he seemed remorseful for what i could read, I wasn't going to be petty about this so I acted normal even ask him about Veronica, not that i care. Anala's birthday arrive and there was a party for her at the club i went to see them ,i had made a tradition to go visit the pirates at least once a week so me and Anala were close now. By the time i arrive the party was on, and then i saw Moose and i was going to run and hug him when i saw her grabbing his arm while he talk and smile at her. Ok that wounded me, if it wasn't my friends birthday i would have run away but i have to stay, at the moment i felt an arm around it was Jacob. Ive come to accept Jacob like my second brother even Ty was ok with that sure he would always come first but it was nice to have an extra brother for this occasions.
When Moose notice me he made his way to me and hug me for a breath minute until Veronica pull him away, the three of us talk a little i was pleasant, which even surprise myself. The night pass uneventful from there I even dance with them before saying goodbye for the night, Moose insisted in accompany me to my apartment but Jacob told him that he was going to do it. The next day i was walking to class when Moose appear out of nowhere and ask me to ditch so we could get some alone time, for the second time in my life i put myself first and said no but i told him that i was free after my class. To my surprise he waited for me, and start to ask me to forgive him for not making time for me and before he could go on i told him it was ok and change the subject. We were going to the cafeteria when Jon, a guy from one of my classes, came to say hi and and ask me out to a party that friday i was ready to say no but i decided against it. Yes i admit i wanted Moose to think that my life was fine without him even if it was a lie, when Jon left and i could sense something change in Moose's mood. That week Moose call me and text me almost everyday and on friday he practically text me every 30 minutes. At first i was happy with the attention until he ask me about Jon, he had been dancing around the subject for almost a week, now was my turn the dance around it, the first text about Jon was ignore as were the next 4 but by the 10 text about him i just told him that he was a very good friend who i found kinda hot. Ok so maybe i didn't find him a bit hot but Kirstin and the rest of my girlfriends thought he was hot, so technically i wasn't liying about him being hot. That shut him off for the rest of the day and i went out on my date.
The date that Moose knew all about, and where we found oh surprise surprise him alone, that was really a surprise, in the party. He came towards us and hang out with us the entire party not leaving our side even when we were dancing, the girly part in me was feeling awesome until i notice how uncomfortable Jon was, so i finally ask Moose about Veronica. That made it he said that she was busy that night and that he just heard about the party and decided to go, then when on and on about how we were so close for years, he even come with us to my apartment by this time i think Jon wanted to punch him, poor guy. I said goodbye to them and told Jon that we should go out in another occasion, it was funny how Jon's face light up while Moose's crumble. Early next morning the door bell rang and i went to open in my pjs to my not so surprise it was Moose he wanted to go out to breakfast, I really wonder how come now he had so much free time for me, i change and went out with him.
"Cam, I'm sorry haven't had time for us, wait let me finish i know you say its ok with you but its not with me"
Really i thought, now its not ok with you how about all the past months when i wanted to actually hang out with you?. "ok, but i think you should talk to veronica about your time to before taking some decisions"
" She is my girlfriend Cam not my owner, and I explain to her how important you are in my life"
Oh now i get the daggers coming out of her eyes. " sure Moose we can make time no problem, is something else wrong?"
" No, why would you say that?"
Because is obvious that something is wrong.." I don't know i just feel like there is something else you are not telling me"
"I just miss you, this months well awful without my best friend and at the party I felt like things had change and to be honest i didn't like it".
"Moose I`ll always miss you but you have other things going in your life like Veronica.."
"Cam forget about her she has nothing to do with us please, lets just be us again"
At that point all the walls I had build against Moose were coming down but I kept myself together knowing him this may be something of the moment.
"So tell me about this Jon guy, should I give him a talk about how to treat my best friend"
Oh that is something else, was he jealous? Well let's test the waters then."No way, Jon is a gentleman. You don't have to worry about him treating me bad" I didn't lie Jon was a gentleman indeed sure I didn't want anything with him but he didn't need to know that.
"Oh ok, Im glad Cam. So do you like him? I mean you can tell me about him" No way I'm not opening that dialogue, what if he wanted to tell me about Veronica oh i think i just puke a little in my mouth.
"Its all very new to have something to tell" Yeah nice save.
"Are you going to call him soon or.."
And then my phone rang and it was Jon, Moose saw the name in my phone and the pic of Jon smiling at me and once again his mood change. Ok so was he really jealous or what?
"Hi Jon, yeah i went out early, oh sorry i miss you..Oh sure lets do lunch today" At that moment Moose bump into me shaking his head saying no. "mm hang on a bit please, thanks".."What?" i said to Moose. "Cam lets do lunch together, lets spend the rest of the day together come on please".
Cue melting heart now "I have class later and.." "It doesn't matter ill go with you come on Cam" "Ok then". "Jon, yeah sorry to keep you waiting i can't make it today, oh ok sure lets do that, bye"
"Thanks, lets start Moose and Cam adventure, first stop Cafeteria. Was he disappointed that you couldn't make it?"
"Yeah a little but he said that we should do breakfast tomorrow and I agree so it was cool at the end" Now cue Moose face getting sad and Cam's heart singing with happiness. Yeah this day is going to be awesome.
I think the more time i spend with moose the harder it gets for me to try to move on, the day was amazing. We went to eat breakfast at the cafeteria first, talk for hours until my afternoons classes, he went to all my classes and even helped me taking notes and make some jokes when i was bored. At night I told him that we should go an visit the pirates, everybody there was shock to see us together again, we had a great time and then he walk me to my apartment hug me tight and we said our goodbyes. Kirstin was waiting for me so i told her everything i could tell something worry her about my story so i ask her and she just told me that even though she was happy for me she was worry that Moose would disappear again so she told me to be careful. I was starting to fall sleep when I got a text from Moose with a winking face and it said you are the best.
The next day i went out to breakfast with Jon honestly i didn't want to but i own him, to my surprise i ended up having a good time. He didn't push the situation to make it a date he was really funny, sweet even, I discover he was a dancer too, not like Moose but like me, a good dancer not a great one. I told him about the pirates and ask him to go with me to see them later he loved the idea. The pirates welcome Jon and he managed to impress them with his move he reminded me a little of Hair, from the MSA Crew, still he consider himself average but nobody else thought so. We went back to campus and to our classes, we share two that day so we spend the rest of the day together even having lunch and dinner together without an awkward moment. Before I went to sleep i notice that i hadn't been thinking about Moose all day and also that he hadn't texted me, to my surprise i was really ok with it.
My outings with Jon became something regular, to my joy it seems like he really didn't want to have a relationship he even told me himself that he really like me but thought that for now he wouldn't be a good boyfriend, he still hope we could go out as friends. And so we did, things between me and Moose were ok we saw each other once a week or at least call each other. One time i was having dinner at the cafeteria when Jon came and ask to join me we were chatting and laughing when Moose and Veronica appear so we ended having dinner all together, the weirdest thing was that even though i didn't like Veronica Jon make things go smoothly and I ended up having a good meal, afterwards Jon take me to my apartment and told me he was heading to boston for the weekend to his brothers and sisters house and ask me to come with him, he didn't want to make things weird so he told me i could ask Kirstin to come too. I told Kirstin and we decided to go, we called Jon and after shouting yeah!, which i found adorable, he inform us that he would be picking us up the next day at 7pm.
The next day was crazy to say the least, we woke up early to pack and finish two assignments we were supposed to present the next day but because we were leaving we had to do it today. Once a track my two professors and hand in my homework it was pass 6pm i was running to my apartment to change when i heard my name I stop and saw Moose running to me. "Hey Cam, wow i thought i wasn't going to catch you"
" sorry i didn't hear you, I'm running late i have to be in my apartment before 7"
"oh its ok, but come on ditch Kirstin and come with me while i wait please, Veronica was supposed to be here but she's running late"
"well I'm sorry Moose, but i have to go"
"why cam? is only a couple of minutes, we can catch up and.."
"no, sorry. I have to go i only have 20 minutes to get there and change"
"are you going out with Jon again?"
"yeah actually we are going to Boston and.."
"what? you are going to Boston alone with him? But you barely know him"
" Moose i know him and I'm not going alone, Kirstin is going with me"
" I don't know Cam i don't think that is such a good idea, maybe you shouldn't go. Does Tyler know about this?"
"are you kidding me? Look thanks for being concern and everything but i can take care of myself and I'm leaving now. Bye"
I didn't even let him speak before running to my apartment when i arrived Jon was there waiting with Kirstin, he offer to wait for me to shower and change but i was so mad i just wanted to leave NY as soon as possible. My phone started to ring with Moose's face in the screen so i decided to shut it off. The trip was fun but i couldn't denied that nagging feeling about Moose being so weird before i left. Why did he care so much? If he liked me he wouldn't be with Veronica and only appearing in my life when she was unavailable. When we arrived to Boston I turn my cellphone on and found a very angry message from Ty asking me to call him back, I was going to kill Moose.
"Hi Ty, Whats.."
"Camille, where are you?"
"I`m in Boston with my friends Kirstin and Jon, and before you say anything else, i know them both well enough. You know Kirstin and we are staying"
"Cam, I trust you ok?. Its just that Moose called me telling about you going away with a guy you barely now, but now that I'm saying this aloud I'm guessing i shouldn't believe anything coming from him."
"Yeah you shouldn't I know Jon, trust he is a good FRIEND, he even told me to bring Kirstin so we wouldn't be alone with his brother and sister. How are you?"
"Fine, we are fine we are starting rehearsal for a new tour in a couple of weeks so we are busy, any chance you are going to make it to thanksgiving weekend here? You could bring your friends if you want, just no Moose please"
"That sounds amazing, ill try and ill ask Kirstin and some of my friends if they can, Oh Ty say hi to Nora, Call you later bye."
"Bye take care"
Well Boston was amazing and we had a blast, I texted Ty telling him that everything was ok and even send him some pics so he would be calm. On the other hand i ignore all Moose´s calls and texts, even Ty text me about him telling me that he was starting to get on his nerves. After coming back to NY i ask Kirstin and Jon to go with me to Seattle for thanksgiving, Kirstin said she was going to visit her family, Jon said he would love to but he didn't know if Ty would be ok so i told him he would be and then I proceed to called Ty and told him and make him feel ok about it.
On tuesday while going to class Moose found and apologize for calling Ty, i didn't want to fight so I told him that it was ok but that if he ever did that again i would kill him slowly and painfully. While walking me to my class he ask for my plans for Thanksgiving and proceed to invite to vault, i just told him I was going to visit Ty for some odd reason i didn't want him to know Jon was coming too. The day that we were supposed to leave for Seattle i saw Moose again he wanted me to know that he was going to miss me and that if i wanted i could still stay just as i was about to tell him no, Jon arrive ready to go and Moose got upset. He told Jon to wait out a close the door in his face.
"Hey what did you do that for?"
"Why?, You lie to me. How could you? You told me you were going to see Ty and know i found out you are going away with him, I can't believe you Camille"
"me? are you serious? First i didn't lie to you, Ty invited us to go, he invited Kirstin too but she couldn't come. Second don't you dare use that tone with me, we are friends Moose so don't you start acting like something else"
" we are best friends cam"
"not anymore, no when you call me only when you have time to spare or when you go behind my back to tell on me to my brother. Look Moose I care about you but things change, I have to go"
" i can't believe you just said that"
" well is how i feel, bye" With that i left the apartment Jon was outside but by the look on his face he heard everything"
"should we go?" "yeah lets go, we are gonna be late"