2Author's Note: I still don't own Sailor Moon, and a note on font settings. Bold is something the character is stressing in their speech and italics is like a thought bubble. Also, this is my apology for taking so long on the update for "The Old Court". I know its not as good as "Senshi Practical Jokes," but I like it anyway. As always, comments are appreciated.
Setting: A giant tree in the middle of an Amazon-like rain forest
"Jupiter, I just want you to know," the senshi of Venus grumbled as she collapsed into her hammock, "I really hate your planet."
"No," the senshi of protection snorted in response as she reclined on a large branch in the same tree, "The one you hate is Artemis. He's the one who talked you into using my home world's rain forests for survival training."
"Yes," Venus immediately replied, "but you're the one who suggested to Luna and Artemis that we 'switch things up a bit' instead of sticking to the usual teams. Why you would even want to go against a genius and a psychic at the same time is beyond me," the senshi commander grumbled irritably, "but because of your wonderful suggestion we're already on week three of capture the flag!"
Jupiter shrugged in response to the mini tirade. "True," she calmly conceded, "but they haven't won yet either, and we've actually seen their flag."
"Only because they're both such paranoid straight arrows that they'd never think to not guard it," the senshi of Love scoffed. "And what did that really gain us?" she raged, "Nothing! They cleared a twenty pace swath around their flag, put it on top of a guard tower made from these stupid over sized trees, and then stuck a sniper with a limitless supply of ammunition at the top!" she raged, "What am I supposed to do with that?"
"I could have done something if they hadn't salted everything too, but you're right. This is getting old," the senshi of protection agreed. "We need to think of a way to destroy that thing or make it so Mars can't shoot at us."
"A heavy enough storm might disarm Reiko, but they'll be expecting us if you do that. Mercury's visor is a problem too. She'll be able to see us, even through really heavy rain," Venus threw in.
"Maybe not," the Jovian said with a shrug, "she told me how it works once. It needs to 'see' things that radiate off you to be able to see the unseen," she explained making air quotes when she said 'see'. "So, we just have to not radiate what she's looking for."
The commander of the senshi mulled the idea over for a minute before directing her attention back to her companion. "Did she ever tell you what she usually looks for?" she asked.
"Heat and magical energy, I think," Jupiter replied.
Venus' face broke into an evil grin as she processed Jupiter's words. "Start working on that storm," she commanded with a laugh, "This is the last night we'll be spending in this tree."
"Where are they!" Venus screeched at the muddy wreckage of Mercury and Mars' base. "We had to go through a mine field to knock this thing down, and all that's here is some lingerie? Wasn't Mars shooting at us this morning?" she demanded to know from her Jovian companion.
"Yes, that would be where our burns came from," she mumbled digging through the shattered wood. "Perhaps she got a premonition?"
"No," the enraged woman immediately dismissed. "Mars doesn't usually get warnings for things like this unless she does a fire reading. They must have planned this well in advance," she theorized as she stalked around the area. "The storm probably triggered their plot, but what did they do with the flag?"
"Obviously, they moved it," Jupiter sighed tossing part of a log back onto the pile. She glanced distastefully at the lacy red undergarments they had found where there should be a flag. "Those are Mars', aren't they?" she warily inquired.
"Yes," the Venusian growled out, "They used to be my favorites. She probably thinks it will ensure she gets them back."
"Or you could always go home and take her to Kallipygos with you," the senshi of Thunder encouraged hopefully. "At least one of them should suffer for spitting in our faces like this."
"I can get both of them back if I make a trip to Kalliphygos," the senshi of Love cackled, "Mercury won't know whether to burn or open her souvenir." She joyfully tossed the insulting undergarments on top of the ruined guard tower with the command, "Light it up," to her subordinate.
"Aye Madam Vengeance," the Jovian jokingly returned before calling down several bolts of lightning on the mostly dry wood.
The two senshi watched the smoking logs catch and turned to begin unearthing Mercury and Mars' new base of operations. They got about halfway across the barren perimeter when their communicators began to emit the high pitched whine that signaled the end of the contest.
"What?" Venus sputtered.
"But we never got a notice that they were in possession of our flag!" Jupiter protested.
"That's because we couldn't find it," a voice called out from the trees in front of them.
Mercury and Mars jumped down from the branches into the cleared area and gazed at the fire appreciatively.
"I know you're fond of exaggerated declarations of intent Venus, but I think this is a bit much, even for you," Mars mockingly commented about the blaze.
"I told you they'd eventually fall for it," Mercury announced with a less mocking smile. "You're on double duty for the next lunar rotation Mars," she announced.
The senshi of Beauty and Courage stared at their counterparts in stunned silence for a few moments before recovering their wits and indignation enough to respond.
"We just lost, didn't we?" the Jovian asked resignedly.
"You were betting on what we'd do!" the commander of the senshi yelled indignantly. "How long did you have this planned, and where was the flag?" she demanded.
"You always said that set was the best way to be offered your favorite treasures," Mars answered with a Cheshire grin, "How was I to know you'd burn it instead of opening the gift you were being offered?"
Jupiter sighed as she asked Mercury, "You tricked us into burning the flag and transmitter?"
Mercury's nod and Mars' ever expanding grin were answer enough for the Jovian and so she sat down to wait for the transport to pick them up and watch the show that was about to begin.
That can't be healthy, she thought to herself as she watched their Venusian companions shifting complexion. "How long do you think it'll be before Luna and Artemis get here?" she asked Mercury as she too sat down to watch the ensuing spectacle.
"At least a half hour," the Mercurian responded. "I wonder if Mars can run that long after not sleeping," she mused aloud.
The Jovian glanced at her companion in surprise. "You were up all night for this?" she questioned, "but I thought you'd had this set up for a while."
"We did, but we couldn't alter the flag until we were sure you'd be in a mindset to burn everything," the senshi of Wisdom replied.
"I see," the senshi of Protection responded taking the information in. "I give her fifteen minutes then," she informed the Mercurian, "Venus is really ticked, and she got a full nights sleep before we came."
"Umm," Mercury sounded noncommittally watching the show begin. "Perhaps we should ask them to hurry up so they don't kill each other before pickup," she suggested to her companion.
Jupiter just laughed.
Author's Note #2: I forgot to mention, Venus Kallipygos is "Venus with the pretty bottom" who was worshiped at Syracuse.