Disclaimers: Not Mine. I swear. Because if it was.. we'd have had a whole lot more smut!
To every reviewer and follower who commented and told me these little rambles made them laugh when they needed one.


There were a few things in Kunsel's life he could honestly say he was afraid of. Spiders, Touch-me-Frogs, little blonds on the war path. But he couldn't say that he feared anything.

Ok well that wasn't true.

There was that one time he'd learn the true meaning of the word FEAR. And it had started off like any other day at any other time of the week. He'd been walking along see, minding his own business when he'd noticed a small black speck of movement coming straight for his location and growing bigger by the second.

Pausing to wonder just what it could be, he would later tell himself he shouldn't have been as surprised by it as he was. And what was the black speck coming at him light a freight train?


And not just Zack as he stood by and watched his best friend fly by him without so much as slowing down, the look of utter terror written across his face. Well that was a new one. Oh not the running by as if his life depended on it, but the look across his face.

It was the sort of look he'd expect someone being told they had a play date with Mad Professor Creepy at 1, and you were already late at Noon!

Lifting a hand up to scratch at his temple, he'd been just about to shake his head and dismiss the whole thing when a second sound of pounding feet alerted him someone was following Zack. Turning to look he was just again as stunned to see the little blond Third coming at him.

What in Gaias name… was the Blond running from, or was he chasing?

Nope.. running. Defiantly running, if the mirrored look of terror across the blonds face meant anything. Expecting the blond to run past him as Zack had, he wasn't expecting the sudden tackle as the blond latched onto him, and then climb up his uniform until the shorter male could look him in the eyes.

" It's.. FEAR Kunsel.. FEAR!" And then like that, the Blond sprang away from him before tearing off in the same direction Zack had gone. More puzzled than ever, h shook it off and shrugged before turning back to continuing on his way towards the

It would only be later and after several rounds of Midgar Red Beer that he'd ever finish the story. And looking back on it now he should have heeded the blonds words and run. But such is hind-sight.

What happened you say?

Well of course you'd want to know. Who wouldn't?

And just what was the true meaning of Fear that Kunsel had learnt that very faithful day? To avoid the company pool, on the third Friday of every month. And why? Because that's when every male board member of ShinRa…went swimming.

A/N: F.E.A.R- Fuck Everything And Run.
* Sorry this one probably wasn't as funny as some of the others. But I'm trying to get back into the swing of writing them.