Once upon a Duke

This is written for the Dukes Crossover challenge posted on a forum. Please feel free to review this story. This story is fanciful and will take the Dukes on a journey of magic. I hope you enjoy.

Deep in the swampland just outside of Hazzard a Sorcerer looked around the stone structure that was his home that he'd long ago built when he had first come to this country. He had grown weary of his ancestral home in the old country and had come to the New World in search of new souls to sustain him. True, he was forced to move every few years in an effort to keep others from noticing that he never grew old, though after all of these years he had his routine down pat. He had homes all over the country but he preferred this old structure since it reminded him of his childhood home.

Lifting his ancient book that aided him in his search, the Sorcerer began to peruse the aged tome and noticed that several of the souls that he had been using to help sustain him have aged to the point that they could no longer be of any use to him. He must replace them and do so soon if he was to survive. He had lived for well over five centuries now and he didn't intend to allow a thing like a few human souls stand in the way of him living another five hundred years. All he had to do was think of a place to find them. But where?

Where should he go in search of these souls? They must be someone whom the law would not go out their way in looking for once they were gone. Usually he would look for the lowest of the low of society; those who were constantly in jail for one infraction or another. When they disappeared there was very rarely anyone that would search for them for more than a few days; if that. He also had learned long ago to do his hunting far from home. He had always feared discovery if he wasn't careful. Today, however, the evil Sorcerer realized that he had a limited time to find replacements for his book. He must find new prey fast.

Smiling, the Sorcerer made up his mind to go to the local town to see just who the local bandits that the law could never get rid of were. He'd just have to move on to his next home a bit sooner than he planned. A small price to pay for the souls that he would gain by going to this town that the locals called Hazzard.


Boss Hogg sat at his desk ranting and raving about the latest plan that the Dukes had foiled. They had cost him three grand this time. What did he have to do to get those pesky nephews of his old friend, Jesse Duke, out of what little hair he still had? Boss took a cigar out of his drawer and lit it while contemplating all of the various plots, schemes and plans that those two Duke Boys had ruined over the years. If he had all of the money that they had cost him since they had first learned to poke their noses into his life he would be a much richer man than he was right now. If only there was some way get them out of the way for just a little while, Boss could take full advantage of even a measly twenty-four hours.

"DUKES, DUKES, DUKES! What I wouldn't do to get rid of them boys for just a little while!" Boss groused as he puffed on his cigar.

"If you are sure about that, I think that I can help you with these men that seem to have you so upset."

Boss sputtered as he looked up to see a strange man dressed in a dark suit standing inside his office. What he couldn't understand was that he never heard the door to the room open or close back once the man had entered his office.

"What are you doin' here in my office? Who are you?"

"I'm here in your office to offer my services," the Sorcerer said with an easy smile. "My name is Roger Lawson."

Boss looked up at his visitor with suspicion, "And just what are your services?"

"I remove trouble makers from their environment," Lawson stated simply.

"And just how do you do that?" Sure Boss wanted the Dukes out of his hair but that didn't mean that he wanted any real harm to come to them.

"That is of no real importance to you," Lawson locked eyes with the portly commissioner. As he did so J.D.'s concerns faded to the back of his mind. "Now, why don't you tell me about these Dukes that are such a bane of your existence?"

Boss shook his head as he suddenly felt a little light-headed but it soon passed. He then told the strange man all about the Duke Family and of the trouble that they had caused him over the years. By the time Boss finished he was once again fuming at the money that he'd lost just in the last scheme alone.

"It sounds as if your life would truly benefit from their absence," Roger smiled as he leaned over the desk, re-enforcing the bond that he had formed with the man.

"Well, yes...But I wouldn't ever want to see nothin' bad to happen to them." Despite the trance-like state that he'd fallen into, the primary rule that he'd lived by still shone through even stronger than his distaste for the Dukes' meddling. He never stood for any violence. He may be a liar, a cheat and a swindler but he would never hurt anyone; even for all of the money in the world.

"Oh, they won't be harmed," Lawson stated as he sneered. "Now, the details are not for you to worry about. Just see to it that they are given this book." Roger pulled his large ancient book out of his briefcase that Boss could have been certain that he hadn't had when he'd first walked in.

"A book? What can a book do to-"

"Precisely," the Sorcerer's eyes flashed. "What harm can a mere book do?" After just a moment's pause to let that thought sink in he continued, "I want you to have this book delivered to these Dukes but whatever you do, DON'T open it. Just leave it for them; in a gift box perhaps."

"Don't open it. Right," Boss said mechanically.

"Now, I must be off. I still have much to do while I'm in town. Once the book is out of your possession you will not recall this meeting. Is that understood?"

"Yes," Boss nodded stiffly. After the man left his office Boss looked down at where Lawson had placed the book and found it within a fancy gift box. Briefly he had the thought that a book that old looked odd in such a fancy box but called for Rosco to come to his office without lingering on it.

"Yeh, Boss?"

"Rosco, I want you to run this out to the Duke Farm," Boss hefted the large box up and shoved it into Rosco's waiting arms.

"The Duke Farm? Now Boss, since when did you send gifts to them good for nothin' Dukes?" Rosco asked in confusion. Hadn't it only been a short while ago that he'd left his little fat buddy in here practically weeping over his bum-business deal that fell through all because of the Duke Boys?

"You don't worry about that!" Boss snapped. "You just take it on out there and leave for them to find it. Just DON'T open it! Do you understand me you Pea-Brain?"

"Gjit! Of course I understand. What do you think I am? A moron?" Rosco sniffed in indignation.

"Well now that you mention it..." Boss muttered. "Well what are you waiting for? Go on!"

"I'm goin'. I'm goin'," Rosco backed out of the office as he grumbled about having to make the delivery of the present for the Dukes. Rosco hopped into his police car and reached over and to scratch his beloved dog's ears before starting the car up. "Alright, Flash Darlin'. Time to buckle up for safety. We're heading out to the Duke Farm for Boss, though I still can't understand why."

Flash gave a woof as she nosed the safety-strap and wound herself up in the seatbelt. She listened patiently to her master as he grumbled about the fat man that told him what to do. Soon enough they pulled up at the farm belonging to the nice family known as the Dukes and Flash watched as Rosco got out of the car and noted that none of the three vehicles that could usually be found out front were anywhere around.

Seeing that no one was home Rosco went to lay the gift box on the front porch and turned to leave. Halfway down the steps, however, his curiosity got the better of him. He just couldn't take it any longer. Rosco turned back up the steps and sat on the top step as he opened the fancy box that couldn't have come from any of the stores around Hazzard. When he did so he found that the box only contained a large book.

"What would Boss be doin' sendin' the Dukes a book?" Rosco asked himself as he flipped it open and saw pictures of what looked like a troll in a fairytale. Holding the book up, Rosco called out to his basset hound, "Lookey, Flash Darlin'; it's a book of fairytales."

Flash woofed her response but then sniffed the air as she smelled something that didn't seem right. Now barking hysterical she began to call to her master.

"Flash? What's the matter?" Rosco asked just before a bright light seemed to be emitted from the book itself. "Gjit! What in the world?" Rosco dropped the book back into his box and got up to run away from it but never made it off of the porch. He was enveloped in the light and quickly disappeared.

Flash jumped out of the open door of the police cruiser and ran over to where she had seen her human disappear. Sniffing around the book that she had seen light up, though it seemed to be completely normal now, Flash began to howl for Rosco. A long and mournful howl that could be heard for miles around.