Chapter 9 (A Thousand Years- Christina Perri):

"Dad, Chucky's been in my room again. My homework is all messed up! He even ripped one of my papers and I worked really hard on it! I hate this!" Seth screamed angrily down at me from the top of the stairwell and holding the apparently useless pieces of his torn English paper.

"Son, it's not the end of the world, you can print another copy. You did save it, didn't you?" I ask him calmly, hiding a smirk because while I think it's funny that he's screaming about a paper that isn't in reality anywhere near ruined I do understand the frustration of younger siblings getting into your stuff.

Rosie used to do it to me all the time. It was like there was nothing more interesting in the whole house for her to get into than my room. I can remember countless hours spent trying to reassemble my own Lego creations, not to mention the time she practically destroyed my entire baseball card collection. I had painstakingly collected nearly the entire 1982 Seattle Mariners team roster and in less than ten minutes she had singlehandedly decimated the cards. Seriously, it looked like a ticker-tape parade had gone through my room. I honestly hated her for the next two years…

Ah, to be that young again.

But then, if I was still that young I wouldn't be where I am today. I love my life. I have a beautiful family and an amazingly sexy and wonderful wife. Did I mention that she was sexy? Yeah well, it's worth mentioning more than once. In fact, let me expand on that thought to say that she's hot as hell. I never thought I'd see anything sexier than Bella that first night in Jake and Rose's kitchen but man, was I ever wrong. A pregnant Bella beats a non-pregnant Bella any day. Hands down. Seriously, if she wouldn't kill me for it I'd keep her pregnant all the freaking time.

Now don't get me wrong, while I think all pregnant women are beautiful, none of them get me as hard as my Bella round with my child does. She owns that look, just like she owns my heart. Oh yeah, and my dick… she definitely owns that.

We've been married for just over five years now, but I know that she's my forever. She always has been. Even back in high school she could've owned me with nothing more than a look, but back then she wanted Doucheward and he wanted nothing more than a good time. But hey, his stupidity is my gain so I can't completely hate the fucker. If it hadn't been for his selfishness I wouldn't have Bella or Seth, not to mention Chucky or the little one currently baking in Bella's babalicious belly. We think it'll be a girl this time, well I hope so anyways. I'm hoping for an Emily Rose McCarty, one who looks just like her mama.

But back to my idiot of a cousin… Because he couldn't stomach tying himself to one of the 'common people' of Forks society he lost out on raising the amazing young man Seth is turning out to be. And I'd be willing to bet that he kinda regrets it now, judging by the look on his face whenever he sees our family. I have everything that should have been his and I don't hesitate to remind him of it each time Bella and I walk into his office for her prenatal checkups. Yeah, we have to go to his clinic, but honestly, his is the only OB/GYN office in Forks. Thankfully he's not the only doctor or we'd be hoofing it to Port Angeles once a month. He and Eric Yorkie of all people opened a practice together. So yeah, Yorkie gets to see my wife's lady parts, not Dr. Assward. Yorkie delivered Chucky, also known as Charles William McCarty, almost three years ago and will be the one delivering the newest McCarty soon.

Shortly after Charlie's passing Tanya gave birth to what was supposed to be the Cullen legacy. Right away it was apparent that maybe Eddie had pinned his hopes on the wrong woman, high society girl that she was, because the baby was a little bit too russet-colored to be a full blooded Irish-America Cullen. Turns out that Tanya had been sleeping with several of her clients and was now the proud mother of a convicted felons' child from the reservation. The funniest part of it though, is that Tanya's baby daddy is Jake's half-brother Paul. Kinda makes you feel sorry for Eddie-boy… that is, until you remember who he really is. Anyways, there was a shit-ton of drama, a very public and nasty divorce and a humiliated Cullen family left in the wake of her 'little indiscretion', as Aunt Esme likes to call it. Either way, Cockyward is all alone up there on his pedestal again.

Hmmm… makes a guy wonder who polishes it for him now. UGH! ... and now I'm officially grossed out by my own thoughts.

"Of course I did, I'm not that stupid Dad. I save everything just in case Chucky does this shi… I mean, this kind of thing," he corrects himself even before I can say anything about his language. His foul mouth frustrates Bella to no end, but I keep reminding her that he's fifteen and it could be so much worse than a few vulgar words slipping from his mouth.

"Okay then, just go print out another copy and this time don't leave it lying around. We'll go to Home Depot this weekend and get you a lock for your room." His face lights up at the idea of the total privacy a locked door will afford him, and I can't blame him; having a terrible two-er in the house isn't easy for a fifteen year old guy. "But I'll need to get your mother on board before we do it. You know how much she hates locked doors."

"But you know she'll say no. Seriously, she gets mad when I lock the bathroom door," he replies with an unmanly whine.

"I know son, but I'll explain it to her. She'll understand and you'll get your privacy, I promise. You just gotta know how to talk to her the right way."

"Talk to who the right way?" my beautiful and suddenly stealthy wife asks from behind my left shoulder.

"Um… you?" I squeak and stammer, making what should have been a statement sound more like a question. Did I mention that she owns me? Or that she's pregnant? Did I happen to tell you that even though she's smoking hot rocking that baby belly, pregnant lady hormones are hella-scary? No one wants a pissed off pregnant Bella in the house less than I do. Horny pregnant Bella? Hell yeah! But piss her off and my nut-sack climbs up inside me and my cock goes covert all ninja style.

"Now why would someone need to know the right way to talk to me Em? Do I need to be handled?" she asks with a cocked eyebrow –which, by the way, we are no longer allowed to call the 'bitch brow', oh no, bad things happen if you call it that out loud around a pregnant Bella… very bad things.

"Of course not baby, I was just trying to explain to Seth why you and I needed to talk about putting a lock on his door before I just went out and did it. You know, because it should be a unified decision kinda thing, right?" I'm really trying not to cringe and hoping that she doesn't notice that I'm kinda-maybe-definitely covering my boys as I see her face start to heat up.

"I see," she says it so that I can tell that she certainly doesn't 'see' anything and I'm trying to figure out if my cock's ninja skills could be shared by the rest of my body. Nope, it's not sharing. Shit. "So, you have to try to talk me into allowing my son to lock us out of his room and keep us out of his business like we have no right to know what's he's doing or what kind of teenage fuckery goes on in his room?"

"No baby, it's nothing like that, I swear. Right, Seth? Seth?" Nothing but air, dead air I might add, meets my somewhat panicked questioning. A quick look around proves that Seth has abandoned me to fight this battle alone. Thanks a lot son. "You see, Chucky got into his room again and this time he tore up one of his papers for school and it made Seth mad, Babe. So I told him that I'd talk to you about getting a lock for his door. That way Lil' C can't keep getting in there and into Seth's stuff." She opens her mouth to say something, but I stopped her by holding up a (thankfully steady) finger. "Please, just hear me out. Seth is fifteen, right?" She nods. "Well, you gotta know that typing up homework isn't the only thing he does in his room. So the way that I see it, having a lock on his door keeps little eyes and hands safe from seeing things or getting into things that they shouldn't. Now, we would have a key that you could use anytime you felt you needed to, and we'll let him know that the locking privileges are limited to keeping younger siblings out only, not parents. But he needs to have some privacy Bells. I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important."

I watch as her stiff shoulders soften and the anger drains from her face. She places one hand on my chest, right over my heart, and stretches up on her toes to kiss me gently. "And that's why I love you Em, because you know how to handle me."

"And I do so love handling you," I say as I wiggle my eyebrows at her and smile the way that I know puts a sexy as hell smile on her face and wrap my arms around her expanding waistline. My hands barely meet at the small of her back now, but that's not where I was aiming for them to stop anyways. I watch the slow arousal seep into her now hooded eyes as my hands grasp the firm globes of her glorious ass and squeeze lightly.

"And I love it when you do Baby, but I really gotta pee. Then Chucky and I have to head over to Alice and Jasper's for his play date with Avery and you and Seth have to head to the Dojo for class. Can't have the Sensei be late for his students, now can we? That wouldn't set a very good example for your new assistant." Seth had just received his 4th degree brown belt last month and to celebrate the occasion the sign above the Dojo doors now reads 'McCarty and Sons Wado Karate' and I had taken him on as my assistant instructor. He was certified to train the younger classes as well as the women's self-defense class we offered by himself, and though he was still taking his own classes to gain higher levels, he was allowed to help me out in the higher belt classes as well. I always get a kick out of watching him get his ass handed to him by the black belts, but it is obvious that his love of the art is always present. His discipline is really good, and if he keeps up with his training, I have high hopes that he'll join me as a sensei there soon as well.

"You're right babe, of course you're right. But I need some nooky," I whine in my hopefully manly way.

"You poor baby, have I been neglecting you?" she purrs. I shit you not, the woman fucking purrs. Holy hell, my cock has come out of hiding and is making its presence known now. It's like a titanium rod and an Ironwood tree fell in love and had a baby, a really big really hard baby, that's how hard I am for this woman.

There's not enough blood in my brain to form any words so I just nod, unable to speak. And grunt, because apparently I don't need brainpower to do that either. Shit, now I know why cavemen used to drag their women off to their caves by their hair; that was the only way to communicate when they were ready to rut. Hmmm, I wonder if it would piss Bella off too much to fuck me if I drug her to our bedroom that way… OR… would it make for some really hot angry sex? Maybe I should wait until after she has the baby to try that.

Focus McCarty! Her lips are moving and they're not doing it over your cock, so she might be trying to say something. I mentally shake myself loose of the lust-induced haze fogging up my head -the upper one- just in time to hear the last part of her sentence.

"… no matter what."

"Huh?" I ask, because yeah, I still don't have full blood flow to my brain yet.

"You didn't hear a word I said, did you Hon?" she giggles. Thank God she's amused because last time I fogged out I came back and she was madder than a wet hen, but Heaven help me, I thought it was sexy as hell when she was fired up. "What was it this time? Pirates? Super spies?"

"Cavemen," I answer and my dick twitches hopefully. "You know Bells, you'd look awfully purty in nothing but a few scraps of animal hide." I say suggestively while rubbing my titaniwood (ironium? woodtatium?) staff against her.

"I'll remember that next time I head to Whales R Us for maternity clothes. Besides, wasn't it one of your fantasies that landed us here in the first place?" she asks rubbing her belly in amusement.

"Hell woman, if it was my fantasy, you'd be like this all the time." I answer with a smug sense of right, my manliness proudly on display in the form of her growing abdomen.

"I know Em, trust me. You know," she looks up at me from under her lush lashes, her eyes playfully giddy with whatever she's about to say. "They probably have a 12-step program for people like you."

"People like me? And what, pray tell, do you mean by 'like me'?" I ask, only marginally interested in her answer. I'm much more interested in the way she's pressing up against me now.

"You know, men who are addicted to sex with fat chicks," she says while trying to keep a neutral look on her face and failing miserably.

"Not fat chicks Bells, pregnant chicks, or more specifically, one pregnant chick. You Baby, only you," I answer in all seriousness and let her see the need in my eyes.

"Always you Em, for the next thousand years at least," she answers back, her needy eyes now mirroring mine.

"Have I mentioned that I love you yet today? 'Cause Babe, I really do," I whisper in her ear. "I also think you look pretty hot in that dress Baby."

"Well if you think I look so hot in it, maybe you should see how I look out of it too…" And there's that fucking purr of hers again. Hello my ironium friend.

"Sweet baby Jesus! Woman, do you know what you do to me?" I growl as I pull her up into my arms and carry her to our room, "not to mention all of the things I'm about to do to you."

Looks like Seth might have to start class without me tonight; I have better things to do right now, and as I close the door behind us I smile, thanking God that Bella doesn't mind having a lock on our door.


That's it folks! Here's that HEA I promised. I can only assume that it won't be blissful perfection, what with a teenager, a toddler and a soon-to-be newborn, but it will be perfect for them. There will not be a sequel, though I am trying to wrangle my muse into helping with a short Seth POV. No promises though, so begging won't help. My muse comes and goes as she pleases, usually giving me enough to leave me frustrated but not enough to finish anything in a short time period. I actually kinda hate the bitch, but what can a mere mortal such as myself do?

Anyways, thanks for hanging in there and dredging through the angst, I really appreciate it. All of your reviews mean so much more to me than I can express.