Where to begin ehehe ^^' Firstly, I apologize to my regular readers. Please don't feel the need to read this story. I actually started this way back in March, but I could only write two or three sentences at a time before being scarred for life. I came up with the idea when my roommate and I were talking about anime characters we thought have kinks, and L came up. Obviously, he would have a candy kink. Then my mind connected that Hunny also likes sweets...and BOOM this story was created. Originally it was going to be a trollfic, but then my pride got the better of me. Please don't think badly of me! 1,913 words of pure crack.

Also, if you don't know who Chuck Testa is, look him up on youtube. Then look up "kids react to Chuck Testa" and then the Chuck Testa remix :D

Warnings: (they are here for a very, very good reason)

Do not read if you do not like lemon fanfics.

Do not read if you do not like boy on boy (yaoi).

Do not read if you ever want to eat sweets again.

Turn back while you still can. You have been warned.

~Basketcase


"Hey, why is it you're called L? Is that the first initial of your name?"

L glanced up from his strawberry angel food cake to stare at the short, blonde-haired boy sitting across the table from him, who happened to be munching on some sugar cookies. It was their weekly get-together to eat sweets and talk.

"I'm afraid I can't say, Hunny," L sighed, stirring his hot chocolate with a candy cane. "I haven't told anyone what it stands for, and I don't want anyone knowing my real name. As a safety precaution."

"Awww, come on, L! Pretty, pretty please? With a cherry on top?"

L couldn't resist the intense gaze coming from the boy's big, chocolatey-brown eyes. Maybe Hunny will be able to understand if I tell him. Yeah, he should understand me.

"Alright, I'll tell you, Hunny. But you have to promise not to tell anyone else."

"I won't, I promise!"

L stared into the small boy's face for any signs of lying. After arriving at the conclusion that the boy was telling the truth, L leaned forward across the table until his mouth was an inch away from Hunny's ear. The delicate whisper of his hot breath caressed Hunny's ear, causing the smaller boy to shiver with pleasure, to L's delight. "It's L...for licorice."

L sat back in his chair and proceeded to finish his slice of angel cake.

"Licorice..." Hunny repeated with a straight face.

"Yes, but please don't say it anymore, you promised you wouldn't tell anyone."

Hunny tried to keep his face straight, but failed miserably and burst out laughing. "Licorice? That is so dumb! Ahahaha!"

L's face turned beet red and he scratched at his black hair as he watched the small boy giggle and laugh uncontrollably in front of him.

"L...for licorice...that is too funny!" Hunny wiped a tear from his eye and took a deep breath to stop laughing. "L?" he asked, for the detective had lowered his head so his face was no longer visible.

L looked up at Hunny and said, "I think you need to be punished for that." L licked the icing off his fork suggestively.

~ Several minutes later ~ (Last chance to turn back)

Hunny now lay sprawled across L's large bed. His wrists were hung up above his head to the bed posts with cheap, pink and fluffy handcuffs; they could easily be broken by such a judo expert as Hunny, if he desired so.

Hunny glanced over at the twenty-five foot long table that had been placed beside L's overly large bed, his eyes drawn to the frilly pale-yellow table cloth. It was covered in an array of all sweets imaginable: decadent cakes, an unlimited supply of whipped dressing, M&M's, pumpkin pie, ice cream sundaes, chocolate syrup, cherries, and much, much more.

L appeared through the doorway to the bedroom wearing nothing but a white chef's hat. Hunny jangled the cheap handcuffs in an attempt to disguise his excitement.

"Wait, L...we can't..."

L ignored the small boy's pleas and surveyed the table of desserts. "You will be punished, Hunny, for making fun of me. I will make a masterpiece out of you with these sweets. I know how much you like them."

Hunny gulped. "But..."

"Let's get started, shall we?"

L left the sweets to the side for the time being, and perched himself on the edge of his bed. Hunny stared with wide eyes as the chef neared. L began by pushing Hunny's shirt up over his head so it gathered in a bunch around his wrists. He whimpered as L's tongue swept over his bare chest. When he shivered from the feeling it ignited inside him, he could feel L smile against his skin.

"Well, aren't you getting excited," L said in a husky voice and continued a damp trail down to Hunny's abdomen. Hunny flinched when he stopped at his navel. To his displeasure L stood up from the bed and strolled over to the table. When he returned to the bed he had a handful of m&m's. Hunny began gyrating his hips.

"What, is there something you want?" L taunted. Hunny's reply was an unintelligible moan. L turned his attention back to the smaller boy's midriff and placed a red m&m in his belly button. He then bent over and sucked it out with his mouth. This caused the boy to moan in pleasure. L continued until he was out of m&m's. Then he licked his fingers. "Why don't we move on to something tastier."

L smeared a slice of pumpkin pie over the boy's chest and abdomen, and topped it with whipped cream and cherries. Then he began his feast. Hunny writhed underneath him, but L steadied him with his hands.

L proceeded in this manner with the remainder of the sweets and desserts on the table. By the time he got to the end of the delicious treats Hunny was panting heavily, a sheen of sweat on his skin.

"L...you're killing me," he panted.

"Are you at the end of your endurance?" L asked. "I'm surprised you even made it this far."

Hunny whimpered where he lay.

"Perhaps we should move on to...the real treat," L suggested and reached for the buttons on Hunny's pants. Hunny's eyes widened.

Suddenly a man walked in through the bedroom door. Both boys turned their heads to face him, L's hands hovering over Hunny's most sensitive spot.

"The front door was open, so I just let myself in," the man said. "I was wondering if you needed any animals taxidermed?"

"Um," L said and paused for a long moment to think about the question. "No."

"Alright, then. I'll just let myself out."

The man closed the bedroom door.

"Who was that?" Hunny asked.

"Oh, it's just Chuck Testa. Now where were we..."

L slowly opened the buttons at the front of Hunny's pants, causing him to tremble. He lowered the zipper at an agonizingly slow speed. Hunny felt a jolt run up his spine, for he was at his limit. He cried out and broke apart the handcuffs constraining his wrists. He panted and grasped onto L's shoulders.

"I was waiting..." L said. "Now we can finally get this started."

"What?" Hunny squeaked. "Get it started?"

"Of course," L said and stared deeply into the boy's eyes. "That was only the appetizer." Hunny appeared as if he was going to pass out, and L shook him by the arms to pull him back together. Then, without another word L ripped off Hunny's black pants and boxers, leaving him naked. "Ah, much better."

Hunny moaned as L slipped his member inside his mouth and then clenched his hands in L's hair and pulled.

"Your lollipop is delicious, Hunny."

Hunny clawed L's scalp with his nails as the dark-haired detective continued his assault. He began to moan and buck his hips, his forehead glistening with sweat as he tried to hold back a cry of pleasure. However, he couldn't hold it in any longer and he brought the back of his hand to his mouth to stifle a loud groan.

"Your moaning is like music to my ears," L said gruffly and held Hunny firmly by the hips as he continued his pleasure-torture.

"Yes, L – right there!" Hunny panted and lifted his hips off the bed.

L took one long last taste then said, "I think you're ready. Do you want my candy cane inside you?"

"Yes," he answered breathlessly, frantically groping for L's hips.

"I want to hear you say it," L whispered in his ear.

Hunny gulped. "P-please L...put your candy cane in me. I want it hard."

"Hard isn't a problem..." L said and pointed to his shaft. "Just look at my meat popsicle."

Hunny's eyes widened as he stared at L's massive erect manhood. "That won't fit! L! I'm too small!"

L narrowed his eyes suggestively and he brushed his lips against Hunny's ear. "I assure you, it will fit." Then he licked a path from his earlobe down his neck, causing Hunny's skin to quiver beneath his touch. "I'm going to put it in now."

"Please, p-put your c-candy cane inside me."

And L did. Repeatedly.

As L was beginning to climax, he grunted, "Do you want me to fill your doughnut with jelly?"

"Yes – please fill me with your – your jelly!"

As they peaked together, Hunny passed out.

When he awoke, he showered and got dressed.

"It's getting kinda late..." Hunny said and walked to the front door. "I guess I'll be going, now..."

L, now dressed in his usual pair of blue jeans and white long-sleeved shirt, accompanied him to the door.

Hunny opened the door but paused before stepping out. He turned around to L and shuffled his foot across the floor. "Do you think...I can come over again next week, L?"

"I'd like that, Hunny."

"But you can't tell the Host Club! If they find out about us...I'll probably get kicked out."

"Well, I can't guarantee that," L joked.

"If you tell them, I'll just have to punish you next time."