My name is Crystal Malfoy. I used to be called Harry Potter before I was turned into a girl by an accident Snape did and married Draco Malfoy at an awesome pirate wedding. A pirate wedding? Is that even a thing After graduating from Hogwarts, I moved into Draco's big house thing and lived there with him NOOO who would have guessed? and his awesome mother Narcissa and also Sirius Black. sirius is dead? Lucius didn't live there anymore because Draco had epically killed him for being sexist, not at all because he was an evil and crul man? making him dead and not alive anymore. ohh i thought that he had killed him but he lived!One day, me and Draco decided to go to St. Mungo's so I could have our baby. you just randomly decided that today was the day you weree going to have a baby! I was wearing a yellow T-shirt, a bright orange vest with blue polka dotes, a purple jean skirt and red sandals with olive green socks. soo we have confirmed that you are still learning to dress yourslef I had dyed my hair blue you dyed your hair blue while in labour and put it into a pony tail thing pony tail THING and I was wearing lots of makeup. you had time to put on makup while being in extreme pain I also had underwear on. who would have guessed?

"Hello, I would like to have a baby today," I told some person. once again you just randomly decided to have a baby

"Right this way," they said, leading me and Draco to a room that was inside the hospital. you would not be this calm if in labour

"Hello, I'm a healer," said a healer. "Get on this bed and start screaming to make the baby come out." did i really just read this scream to make the baby come out?

"Okay," said I as I got on the bed. "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I said. so here you are at a hospital you sit in a bed and go ahh and out comes a baby!

"Push! Push!" yelled Draco helpfully because otherwise I wouldn't have known about that part. Thats the whole part! but wait! i forgot you scream NOT push to get a baby out I screamed epically some more and made the baby come out of my pleasure hole. 80 year old woman would not use that term Then I picked up my awesome baby you just had a baby got up and picked him! and it was a boy and I knew he would never be sexist thats your first thought when you see your child? like that sexist idiot Ron Raper that used to be called Ron! that was just the sadeset thing i have read and ron raper really? sad just sad..