disclaimer: disclaimed.

fandom: check please
pairing: jack/bitty
prompt: jack's jealous rage because parser makes a move on bitty

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"Nope," says Jack, and actually physically lifts Bitty off the ground. "Nope, it's not happening, no way, absolument non, je ne suis pas permets que cela se produise jamais–"

Bitty makes this tiny squeaking sound like a mouse being stepped on, and clings. It would be indescribably cute, except it's Parser's fault, and fuck Parser.

"Are you gonna put me down?" Bitty asks, wide-eyed.

Jack thinks about it for all of half a second. "Not while Parson's here."

"Oh," Bitty says faintly. "Okay."

"Call me, kid!" Parser yells. "I'm a better lay!"

Shitty punches him in the background. It's the most fun Jack's had all week.