Notice and Update From an Apologetic Author #3
I don't know if I mentioned this or not, but I was actually at camp for the last two months. You may have been able to assume that if you had been around when I was finishing with GED and WAM, but yes, I went for twice as long as before. Why? One month isn't enough. And let me assure you I had the best time of my life. I want to go back. I really hate this place.
I've changed a lot over the last two months. Camp made me grow as a person and become more confident in myself. I learned how to see the positive and not be the biggest pessimist in the whole wide world, because honestly, my mind set is in a place where I automatically assume the worst case scenario. It's gotten to the point where I think compliments directed towards me are a sympathetic lie or a joke. But you guys have been very supportive of my fan fiction and I thank you for that. I love reading your reviews and knowing that you guys at least read what I spent time in writing, even if sometimes the pessimist I am makes me think that I suck.
And I guess that's why I really haven't been updating. Because I don't think I'm good enough. I doubt my abilities as a writer. Perhaps my writing is all crap and you guys have been writing reviews as a way to say "I'm sorry your not great, but I'll encourage you to keep trying." I know that's not what you guys mean. But camp helped a bit. I'm trying not to revert back to my old self, but I'm hanging on. Once I have enough confidence again is when I'll write again. But first, I have to take some stupid tests to prove that I'm actually a competent person and the only reason I failed half my classes last year was because I was depressed and had no motive. Besides, what's the point of trying if I knew I was going to fail? And also first I have to start school and get on a good start.
Once I've gotten enough confidence in myself and steady grades, I'll return. I honestly miss all of you and EOG and Higurashi, even if I've turned my interests to other TV shows for the time being last year. And honestly, yes, I am more into other things than Higurashi at this moment, but you know what? I want to write this. I've been thinking about it too long not to. My other ideas for other fandoms aren't as strong yet. I need time. But I think I can do EOG. I think anyways. Maybe I am a crappy writer and maybe it's not worth it, but I can try. That's what I'm trying to tell myself, anyways. It's hard to believe in yourself when you've spent a lifetime believing that there's no hope.
On another note...
How many of you have read/watched the first few episodes of Dangan Rompa? I love it. I mean, I'm in the middle of the second chapter (no spoilers, please!) But I really love it. And if you guys haven't, go watch it. Now. The anime adaption is still coming out, but there's a visual novel you can read. There's a play through. I can give you a link if you're interested, which you should be If you like Higurashi (which I hope you do, since you're on the fan fiction archive and reading this now) you'll love Dangan Rompa. How do I explain it? Hm. Super-Talented teenagers get locked in a school and forced to murder each other. It's a whole murder mystery and survival game and wow, it's great. That doesn't even begin to cover it. I'm sure the internet can provide a better summary than I can but be careful of spoilers. Good characters, good plot, good mysteries, and you have fun getting to know everyone and trying to figure out who will be the next victim and next murderer. Go watch it or read it now. Then PM me and tell me what you think. I'm only on the second chapter, so if you've already watched/read it, then don't spoil me please. But holy crap is this a good series. No. I mean it. Go. Right now.
Why are you still reading this instead of Dangan Rompa? Message me if you want the link to it. Then read and don't stop.
~Crimso