Not Just Partners
"Deeks! Seriously, I am fine! You can go home now!" I smiled at the frustration in her voice.
"Kens, you heard the doctor! You need someone to take care of you. You were only allowed to leave the hospital because the nurses were threatening to kill you." I said, laughing.
"I wasn't that ba – okay I can't lie. I was such a bitch." She laughed along with me. "Fine. Fine. Come on in."
"Thank you Princess." I said with a smile. I walked with Kensi into her apartment and put her go-bag down on the couch, looking around the room. Kensi never was one to be super clean, I knew from living with her, but her apartment was a little messy. But I didn't make a comment because she really shouldn't be punching things while injured. "Sit down Fern. I'll make us some lunch, actual food sounds good right about now." Kensi only laughed and plopped herself down on the couch. Unfortunately she did this a little too hard and hissed at the pain coming from her ribs.
"Kens, you okay?"
"Yeah I'm fine."
"My ribs are a little sore but I will be fi – good. I will be good Deeks, so go make some lunch." I left Kensi on the couch and went into the kitchen.
I rested my back against the fridge and took a deep breath. I told myself that I was only doing this because Kensi needed someone to take care of her. But that was a lie. If I didn't do this Callen, Sam, Nell, Eric, hell even Hetty would take care of her. I was doing this to be close to her and in turn, I was torturing myself. Now that the cat was out of the bag, now that I had said that I loved Kensi out loud, I couldn't seem to hold it in anymore. I couldn't push it to the back of my mind and pretend that there was nothing between us. God, I was such a martyr.
"What's taking lunch so long Deeks?" Kensi voice pulled me out of my depressing thoughts. I quickly made us some sandwiches and brought the plates out to Kens.
"Patience is a virtue that needs to be learned Kensi."
"Oh shut up and give me my food." So I handed Kensi a plate and joined her on the couch. Sitting there, eating, and watching crappy reality TV I found that I couldn't be happier. So I was torturing myself but I couldn't bring myself to truly mind.
After lunch Kensi decided that she needed to take a shower so she made her way to the bathroom. That is where she hit a little snag. At the hospital she still had the residual morphine in her system so dressing herself wasn't that difficult. However now all of that was gone and all she had was the hospital prescribed painkillers and they weren't nearly strong enough. She managed to get her jeans off perfectly fine but because of her broken ribs the shirt was another story.
"Deeks… Can I… Can I have some help?"
I almost jumped out of my skin at the sound of Kensi's voice. I felt extremely happy that she felt comfortable enough to get me to help her. I walked into Kensi's room and knocked on the bathroom door.
"Princess, you decent?"
"Not really but I still need your help." I opened the door and was greeted by the sight of Kensi in her underwear, trying to get her shirt off. I walked over and gently grabbed the hem of her shirt. I pulled it over her head, carful to not hurt her ribs or reopen her wounds. "Isn't this where you say this is how the dream sequence starts?"
I smiled, "I would but you really shouldn't be hitting me with gun shot wounds." She laughed then an awkward look appeared on her face. She then gestured to her bra. Oh right… She couldn't take that off either.
"Here" I said, handing her a towel to keep herself covered. I went behind her and unclasped her bra, trying to keep my hands away from her back. One of my finger grazed her spine and a shiver ran through her. "There…" I coughed and tried again. "There you go."
She turned and faced me, holding the towel to her front. "Thank you." She said shyly. Kensi didn't do anything shyly. I nodded and left Kensi to her shower. Once I walked out of the bathroom I pushed my back to the door. I had no idea how I was going to manage just being her partner.
What I didn't see was Kensi push her back against the other side of the bathroom door and take a deep breath. She shook her head, trying to stop the shivers that Deeks sent down her spine. They were so not just partners but she wasn't ready to admit it.
After her shower Kensi managed to pull and oversized t-shirt over her head. She looked down and saw it was the old LAPD shirt she stole from Deeks after their undercover assignment as Melissa and Justin. But her ribs were throbbing too much for her to attempt to change it so she just walked out into the living room after putting on some yoga shorts.
Deeks was relaxing on Kensi couch, drinking a beer when she walked out of her room. He almost chocked on his beer when he saw what she was wearing. Extremely short shorts and one of his own shirts. God she was killing him! First it was not remembering his love confession, then asking him to help undress her and now she was wearing his clothes. Why did God hate him?
She sat down gently on the couch beside him and grabbed his beer. "You really shouldn't be drinking that with painkillers Kensi." She just glared at me. "Alright alright." I got up, grabbed a beer, and put Kensi's favourite movie in the DVD player. I joined her again on the couch and sat down to watch DeCaprio's best performance.
About half way through the movie I felt a weight on my shoulder. Looking over I saw that Kensi had fallen asleep. My arm had been lying on the back of the couch so tentatively I put it around her shoulder. I couldn't do any harm now that she was asleep. How wrong I was. Once she felt the arm around her, she snuggled closer to me and laid her head on my chest, just above my heart.
What I didn't notice was Kensi's little smile at the feeling of my arm. I didn't hear the sigh when she cuddled closer. If I had seen any of these things I would have realized that Kensi wasn't actually asleep. However, I didn't see any of it.
Kensi and I essentially lived together for the next 4 months. I stayed at home full time for the first month, until Kensi felt well enough to take care of herself. After those first 4 weeks Kens told me that I could go back home, sleep on something other than a couch, but I told her that I was staying there until she was back at work. Our agreement was that I would go to work but when I wasn't there I was staying at Kensi's, helping her even if she said that she didn't need it.
It felt to comfortable. Living together, cooking meals, being domestic. Hell we were even sleeping in the same bed because after that first month she told me that she felt guilty for making me sleep on the couch for so long. It was that night, with a threat if I tried anything, we slept side by side. It was like our assignment as Melissa and Justin accept this time it wasn't an undercover assignment. We weren't pretending to be an alias, we were Kensi and Deeks. And yet it was far too comfortable.
It hurt me every time Kensi gave me a smile and I knew that she thought of us as nothing more than partners. I wanted so much more than to just work with her but everyday when I woke up beside her, I put on a smile and pretend that I was perfectly happy. If only me being in love with my partner stayed by biggest problem.
A/N: This story takes place right after Bleeding Love. I know I said the sequel would be up but there is a big time jump in the sequel and I thought you guys would like a glimpse into Deeks caring for Kensi. The sequel (Knight in Shining… Wetsuits?) will be up soon, I promise.
As always review,