Just a crazy thing me n my bestie came up with...kidnapping awaits...I don't actually own them...yet... :D

Chapter one

The two shadowed figures laughed as the girl fell off the cliff. Ok, so they pushed her. So what? Point is, she's dead.

"Do you have your list ready?" asked the shorter of the two.



"Yes, yes I have it. Don't get your panties in a bunch."

"Good. Initiate phase one!"

Miranda's p.o.v settings, Her Basement...uh Headquarters

I watched Mikki pull out her bag Er I Meean Jared the Gay Panda.

"im pretty sure I told them to meet us here." she growled. I rolled my eyes, most likely she told them but didn't tell them what time.



"Did you tell them what time to meet us here?" I asked. She feigned innocence and smiled. "oops." ugh! Pulling out my phone I messages Sammie to everyone to come now.

"sorry." Mikki apologized when I stuffed my phone back into my pocket. Smiling at her, I flicked her nose.

"next time tell them what time." she stuck her tongue out then squeezed me in a hug.

{20 mins later, and mikki's p.o.v}

Setting, cave off the shore of California

I smiled at my three captives. it had taken me longer than I thought to catch and bind them, but dammit I managed it! As one of them groaned in an annoying pop-ish voice, I kicked him upside the head until he was unconscious. Or dead. I wasn't sure which.

Yes, I had managed to capture the Bieber, Andy Biersack, and Gerard Way. GO ME! *does happy dance*

While I adored Andy and Gerard, Justin-friggen-Bieber was just there so my best friend and I could torture him and have some fun. Eeeeeeevil fun.

"Why are you doing this?" asked Andy's smexii voice. I grinned at the hotness and said in reply:

"Because I have a list. A devious, dirty, evil, wonderful list. And you, mister hotty, happened to be on it!"

I smiled at the flying monkies surrounding me. So cute!

I mean, um, the waters of Mexico? Yeah...that...

{at the same time as Mikki is being insane as crap...}

(hiding in the bushes of John Cena's house)

'i bet Mikki is having better luck at this then I am!' I thought with a frown. So far I had managed to get Bam Margera with little difficulty. Well not entirely, I had to escape his cat. His cat is EVIL.

I put him in Shawn's car and then retreated to the bushes outside John's house. His wife stood in all her horror-ness in the window.

"I can take her out?" Tailor offered. I waved off her offer and turned to Sydney.

"knock, run, then,' turning to Tailor, 'You can take her out." my friends giggled with anticipation and my heart swelled with pride.

"Everyone know what we're doing." I asked. Tailor and Sydney nodded and I grinned. "Go my puppets!"

{a bit later with Mikki}

I woke up cuddled up to a tied up Andy. Gooooooott his smexiiness rolled off of him in waves.

"Hey, chick, wake the hell up!" yelled my buddy Alex. I adored him, but urg I was dreaming of my monkeys!

"Yes, Lexi?" I practically growled.

"We need your help getting Gerard's brother and the girls associated with them!"

I stood up, kissing Andy's cheek as I stood up. He flinched away but I didn't take any heed. I smiled at Alex, hugged him, and moved to the door of the hotel in the middle of Tennessee.

"we need some twizzlers!" yelled Moira on the ride to New Jersey. It took a while, but we finally shut her up with some weed (to a happy cry of "YAY WEED!")

When we reached Jersey, I creeped up through the bushes of Gerard Way's home. I could hear loud crying inside the house, so I assumed the bitch Lyn-Z had realized Gee was gone, and by the other cars in the driveway I figured the rest of the band and their respective chicks were with them. I nodded to Moira, made a whirring motion to dennis, and flicked my fingers to Alex. All three of them looked at me like I was stupid. FML. I held up three fingers and then pointed with my other hand to the house. They nodded, so I dropped my fingers one by one and then screamed "CHARGE" as we ran to the house.

(with Miranda)

John moaned and rolled over, his gorgeous blue eyes came into view. I smiled and imagined myself in his arms.

"who..who are you?" he asked. I frowned, his voice was gruff as if he had been hurt. Turning around i smacked Shawn's arm.

"What?" He whined.m

"Bear, hand me the bottle of water." he obliged and slipped it into my hands. I looked back at John and opened the bottle.

"I'll tell you one of my nick names, Rana, here drink." in pressed the bottle to his lips and tilted it. He chugged it down and the faintest hint of a smile traced his lips.

"Is that Bam Margera?" he asked. I cut a look at Bam and bit my lip. He was curled in a ball with his thumb in his mouth. I nodded.

"why did you take us? Are you going to hurt us?" I frowned again.

"I could never hurt you...I'm just simply...following a list."

"are there more?" i nodded...why am I telling him this, oh yeah. John Cena is AMAZING.

Pulling out my phone I messaged Mikki.

$ how it goin Ho : I do believe in YOUR MOM:

&i has several. Got da Biebz. Whoo! Hbu flyingmonkeyz

$ WHAAAA really? I gots Bam and John, going for Joe and Knox next : I do believe in YOUR MOM:

&sehr gute. I'm hungry. Feed me biznitch! Btw I maaaaaay have killed miss Naomi blah blah in a drive by flyingmonkeyz

$ HOW THE HELL *open mouth in shock* I honestly don't want to know what Tai did to Missy and Lizz, Bam is sooo cute! :I do believe in YOUR MOM - file attached-

&eeeeep sooooo cute! He reminds me of my flying monkeys... Heehee ok ok so remember that one thing with those people in the place? I lost my turkey there and hugged the child again but his dog chased me off with a rubber chicken. flyingmonkeyz

$ *smacks you* take your pills chicks, giiiiiirl I think your losing it. Welll if you ever had it *stares at you in shock* why a rubber chicken? Heey we need to meet up at one point, I'm in TN and Knoxvilles's place is my next destination. Oh Fred.. :I do believe in YOUR MOM:

&alrighty baby cakes! Woohoo hot girl right here! Hm... Can I take her too? Btw, let's meet in Memphis tomorrow! flyingmonkeyz

$ Noo follow the list you Jashinist Bitch lol ILY, will do we'll get a motel there after I snatch JK, Aye Aye gtg at his place 3 :I do believe in YOUR MOM:

&bye babe here's a bloody bieb. -file attached-

{Mikki's p.o.v.}

Setting, Memphis TN

I put my phone in Jared and then put him back on my back. Alex and Moira were currently feeding the prisoners. Except Bieber. He no can haz. I glanced at the pigs eating beside me. They were taking care of my corpses, Lyn-Z, Jamia Iero, and Juliet Simms. Heehee. They could control my sex-slaves no longerrrrrrrr...

"Hey, Mik, we're out of food for the babes!"yelled out Moira. I nodded to her and flipped out my phone, dialing.

"Philleppe, we need chicken. Get here quick sweetie!" I chirped. As I hung up on Miranda, not allowing her to speak. Buahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa aaaa my monkeys had returned...

(Miranda's p.o.v)

"Mikki just called me Philleppe?" I rolled my eyes. Knoxville, Kenny and Joe all reside in the back of Shawn's pedo van. John and Bam were awake and, weirdly, talking to Tailor and Sydney.

"What did you do with our wives?" John asked. Tailor smiled sweetly and shook her head. "have no fear Cena, no harm came to Lizz. Bam sorry but i took Missy's ass out." I rolled my eyes and gave Tailor a wink.

"fuck I don't care Missy is a bitch from hell." I barked laughter. Then climbed into the back. Positioning myself between them I sighed.

"Hey Babe!" Shawn yelled.

"yeah Bear?"

"you wanna get the chicken before we pull into the motel, I'll stop at Walmart." I smiled at Sydney and Tailor.

"Shawn you stay with these here babies, Syd and Tai. WALMART!"

{mikki's p.o.v.}

I smiled at the black haired, super sexy guy in front of me. Mhmmmmm I would have him.

"Kann ich dir helfen?" he asked. I grinned and nodded. He cocked a well-manicured eyebrow at me and I held a napkin to his nose. Gotta love chloroform.

I boarded the plane back to memphis from Germany with my sleeping charge. Heehee he was sooooo cute. I cuddled up to him, and then I slept for most of the bajillion hour flight.

The plane landed and I dragged Bill through the Airport to the hotel. One would think someone would have stopped me, a teenage girl dragging a grown man through the city for several blocks, but this is america hooker. No one cares unless he's famous...fuuuuuuuuuc-

"BILLA!"I heard the fan girl cry. I ran as fast as I could to the hotel and slammed the door behind me to face my pissed off best friend.


Me and Sydney ran through the Candy isle whilst Tailor hunted down a dead chicken. "BUTTERFINGERS!" was my battlecry as I charged the isle. My plastic Lightsaber raised above my head.

"FOR DIABETES!" Sydney yelled. I laughed my blonde ass off and smiled when Tailor popped up.

"buttercream, I could hear on the other side of the Walmart!" she yelled. I shrugged and threw candy into the cart. My phone beeped and I pulled it out. Sammie's name flashed, sticking it against my ear I cheerfully said hello.

"how's it going?" her child like voice asked.

"grrrrrrrrreat."'i cheered.

"thanks tony the tiger I am now deaf, and Mikki?"

"good, imma meet her when's I leave." Sammie continued to inform me that the media hadnt caught up yet. I was all bubbly inside. Hanging up I asked if we have everything. When my puppets were satisfied, and we paid for the crap like good (LIES) citizens, we left.

2 days later

"WHERE THE HELL IS SHE?!" I yelled out. Alex, Mo and Dennis all looked bored while my puppets flinched at my anger. I looked over at the captives, now laying on the bed and floor. My captives compared to Mikki's captives...WOOOOW! She treated them so meanly too, she had them tied up. Who does that?! They were terrfied! I heard a clink at the door and spun around. Mikki came in with fucking fag Bill CowShit in her arms.

"MIKAYLA!" I slammed into her, causing her to drop Bill and Alex and Shawn to catch him. Pining her to the ground I growled.

"babe I know your mad..but you look hot." she giggled. I rolled my eyes and lifted up.

"where in the hell were you?!" I growled.

"Germany, had to get Billa." she smiled at the "man" and I sneered.


"love you to." she placed a kiss on my cheek. I tried to stay mad, but with ADHD and it being so damn hard to stay mad at my BFF. I frowned and simply flicked her nose.

"uh..scary chicks..May I ask what's going on?" Kenny asked.

"weeeeeeeell, we're a couple of teenage girl that are gonna f-" I covered mikki's mouth with my hand.

"love you all!"I finished for her. Bitch licked my hand so I slapped her with it.

"HAND SANITIZER, she licked my hand." tailor, Sydney and Shawn went into a frenzy trying to pull it from my bag.

"I wanna go to a mental hospitution!" yelled mikki's phone. We looked at it in shock.

"Oh, Sammie, you're on speaker!" Mikki said. Ugh she's nuts.

{mikki's p.o.v.}

Soooooo... My nut job germaphobe slathered her hands in germ-x while I got Bill settled.

"hey, hey, no tying him up!" yelled Miranda. I looked at her in question.

"If he wakes up, he'll run!" I explained. She shook her head.

"lock the shemale in the bathroom with Kenny!" she grinned.

I just sighed and shook my head. Her and those insults...

"So," I said. "how did it all work out for you?" Miranda rolled her eyes and replied

"looooong story. And you?"

"also crazy long, but shortened by the pony magic of friendship!"

Everyone in the room (that was awake anyway) facepalmed.

"MEDZ, NOW" commanded Alex. I sighed and walked away. No one understood my banana powers of fish...

I sat down and began to tell my story of fun, followed by Miranda's, and then...

"and then Mikki walked in the door and we all know what happened then!" Miranda says.


(Miranda's p.o.v)

I closed the door behind me with an audible click. Wincing at the sound, only I would leave at 4 in the morning. Looking down the hall I decided to check on my puppets before I leave. Tip toeing to John's & Randy's room I slowly opened the door. Hoping slightly that they'd be naked in bed together. My hopes and dreams (ok fantasies) were crushed when I opened the door. Randy was splayed out on his bed, his mouth hanging open and the most adorable goofy look plastered to his face. John on then other hand...well not all my dreams were crushed. His blanket was in a ball at the end his bed. Oh dear GOD my babe was naked. Being all stealth like I pulled out my phone and snapped a photo. Giggling as I checked the rest of them I whispered a 'see you soon' and was off to capture my last puppets. Oh how I love mine and Mikki's insanity!

(Mikki's p.o.v)

I hear mirmir get up giggle and leave. I don't pay much attention though, as there just so happens to be a rather sexy Drummer beside me.

"CC," I whisper in his ear. He groans and rolls over. I poke him hard in the side.

"Nnnnnnnnn..." he groans again. I can't help but smile, but it doesn't last long. My tummy begins growling so I smack him with my pillow until he looks at me with one eye. "yessss?"

"I'm huuuuungry.." I whine. He just sits there, staring at me, until my puppy face (and the tazer held up threateningly) win him over and he decides to feed me. He swoops me into his strong drummer arms and carries me to our ginormious kitchen that Miranda never seems to use... Lazy hooker.

CC looks through the cabinets until he finds whatever the hell he was looking for. Its right about now that I realize he had dropped me on the floor to find the food. Meanie.

"call meh when it bezzlez done, okee?" I ask. He looks at me oddly and then nods. I decide to go mess with my other flying monkeys within the house. My imaginary friend Cart walks beside me, commenting randomly.

"you know you're a little mean to them," he says. I shake my head.

"you sound like Miranda!" I yell.

"I do not!" comes the affronted voice from down the hall. Gerard Way walks up to me. "Last I checked I still sounded like a guy, sooooo yeah..." he said. I shake my head.

"I was talking to Cart you dumbass!" I say. He shakes his head at me.

"you, girl, are batshit crazy."

{mirmirmirmir p.o.v.}

Jensen, Jared and Misha seemed to take the whole, Oh my God I'm being kidnapped, thing reallllly well. Zak i had to use my special friend...chloroform! Chris...he saw the pedo van and walked right up to it...he might be high. Now I'm on my way back home with Jensen and Misha asking non stop questions.

"why exactly are you taking us?" Misha asked. I rolled my eyes, I've explained it twice.

" I have a list I must follow...you guys are on it." feeling bad at the venom in my words I smiled and peeked a look at him. "also your gorgeous." Jensen snorted, I swear they are worse then teenage girls..I should know.

"hey miss kidnapper babe, the big dude...uh the polish one is waking up." Chris yelled. I looked back and saw Jared lifting up and leaning back against the vans wall.

"Dude you are the only person I know who takes a nap when they've been kidnapped." Jensen poked at Jared. Jared gave him a very nasty finger and I couldn't help but giggle.

Pulling into the tip of the driveway and parking, I climbed into the back.

"sorry guys, kidnapping policy, gotta hood yeah." I lifted the black hoods and felt my heart thud at their sad faces. "ok." they all said sadly. I glanced at Zak and frowned. The guy was still out.

"kidnapping babe." Chris spoke. "Rana." I said with a smile. He nodded.

"is it weird to say...your the best damn kidnapper, like, EVER!" I laughed and kissed his cheek.

"thanks...I think." I pointed at the hoods again and again cringed when they frowned.

"here go." I handed them out and surprising enough, they all put them on. Sending Shawn a quick text. I helped them out of the van and over to Shawn who walked them the rest of the way to the house. Climbing back in I went to work on waking Zak up. Poking his face and nose didn't help. Neither did yelling continually into his ear. Finally i settled on driving the van up and having Shawn pull him out. Tailor came up to me the second I got inside.

"Zak." she asked. I nodded and placed a kiss on her nose. she shrugged and walked away.

"Molly!" I yelled. The tall, dark and intimidating girl ran up to me.


"I got Misha, don't break him." she fist pumped the air and took off. Walking to my room i grinned finding Joe lying on my bed.


(KittyKatGermanyMikaylaMikkiD oitsu p.o.v.)

I call all of my flying monkeys into the meeting room. They look scared, which is understandable considering I had been being kinda mean... Ok, yes, I admit it. I'm mean. But dang it, I can't help that! It's just who I am.

"Umm... What's your name?" asks the unique voice of Frank. I blink at him.

"I didn't tell you my name?" I ask in shock. Everyone shakes their head. I stare at them for a moment, then smile.

"Call me Mikx!" I say. They all nod.

"So why are we here?" asks Gerard Way. I smile at him.

"Well, for one thing, I want to apologize for being a little, umm, vicious? Mean? Bitchy? Whatever you wanna call it. Anyway, I feel bad, so I want to make it up to you... Wanna help me beat up the Bieber?" I look at them hopefully.

They seem to think for a moment. I could feel myself getting really nervous but I refuse to let it show. One by one, each of my guys smile at me and nod. I grin at them and stand up. "To the basement!"

We got ready to attack him viciously. 'I wonder what Miranda is doing... Hope she got her puppets...heehee cheese.' I thought to myself.