A/N: Okay, I know it starts a bit strange, but a swear it's really funny when you get to the end. It's also really funny when you reread it, 'cause you know what's going on. So please stick with it. And, of course, I don't own Bleach, I just write fics based on it. Enjoy!
Toshiro was getting a bit annoyed. He had thought himself clever to start looking for his lieutenant at her favorite hangouts, but she wasn't at any of them. He had searched through all her bars, tracked down Shuhei and Izuru, question them, found Nanao, questioned her, and he even went to the president of the Soul Reaper Women's Association to ask if Rangiku was doing anything for her. Everyone was a dead end. Now he was walking back to the Squad 10 Barracks. He spotted a squad member and stopped him.
"Is Rangiku in the office?" he asked.
The squad member nodded. "She was there earlier," he paused like he just recalled something. "But I suppose she could have slipped out. Though," he thought a little. "I think she had some sake with her."
Toshiro sighed and waved off the subordinate. Of course the one time I start my search outside the office is the one time she's actually there, he thought. He sighed again, she's probably drunk now. Just great; he wondered what she had done to the office. One time she was so out of it that she was dancing on the table; another time she sloppily painted the office pink, there was paint everywhere: windows, walls, ceiling, floor. Surprisingly enough, she hadn't damaged any paperwork, bookcase, desk, or couch. Still, if she had been drunk enough to splash paint on a wall, there was no telling what else she could do. How did she get that paint anyway? He had asked around, but no one else knew either.
He approached the office with something close to caution. He heard nothing when he pressed his ear to the door. Standing off to the side a little bit, he gently, slowly, slide open the door. The smell of sake wafted out to the office. He took a sniff; the smell wasn't too bad, but he still scrunched up his nose in disgust. He entered the office and surveyed the scene before him. From where he was standing he could see his desk on the far left with a small stack of paperwork neatly on it, Rangiku's desk on the right with a not-so-neat stack of paper on it, one of the couches' backs and the front of the other was facing him. So, this time she didn't move any furniture. He could also see several jugs of sake on her desk, some lying on their sides. A few smaller bottles were scattered between her desk leading to the couches; also not too unexpected, I suppose this means she asleep on the couch again. He could also see her pink scarf draped on the couch whose back was facing him.
He sighed inwardly and heard the soft breathing of sleep as well as a slight rustle of fabric, like she was repositioning herself on the couch. He silently hoped that meant she was going to wake up soon. Toshiro took a step forward and started to round the couch on the right side. As soon as he passed the back of the couch and got a good view of the space between the couch and coffee table, he stopped dead in his tracks. His eyes widened, taking in the scene in front of him with something close to horror as his face started to feel hot. Rangiku was lying on the floor under a blanket between the coffee table and the couch he had just passed. He was standing at the end where her feet were, but he could clearly see that her hair was ruffled and her bare right arm was laid across her stomach. But the fact that she was probably naked under that blanket wasn't the worst part, oh no. The worst part was the fact she wasn't alone. Nope, she had a man with her, and not just any man, it was Gin Ichimaru, Captain of Squad 3. The man also appeared to be less-than-decently clothed if the robes peeking out from under the other couch and his bare right arm wrapped around Rangiku's shoulders were anything to go by.
Honesty, most people would probably say that he was too young to see this, but too late, he had. Toshiro could feel the heat spread to his ears and he knew his face was probably red as a tomato. He gulped audibly and took a step backwards. However, he froze again when Gin shifted in his sleep.
"Ran…" he murmured so softly Toshiro barely heard it.
Rangiku, in turn, snuggled a little farther into Gin's side. Toshiro was about to take another step back, but Rangiku's action had apparently roused her. She yawned softly and sat up, holding the blanket to cover her chest. Her waking had, apparently, caused Gin to wake, for he rubbed is left eye with his left hand and stretched his right into the air in a stretch as he too, yawned. These two's actions allowed Toshiro to see more skin, the top half of Gin's chest and Rangiku's shoulders to be exact, reaffirming his initial suspicions of them not being clothed. His eyes widen more though when Rangiku looked up at him.
"Uh…Hi, captain," she said with a sheepish expression.
"Na?" Gin said as he tilted his head forward to look at the younger captain, as he was still lying down. He smiled, as usual, but it had the feel of a child that had gotten caught. "Hi'a, how's it goin'?"
Toshiro sputtered. He finally got out, "Wha-wha? I-I-you. You-!" his voice raised in pitch at the second "you". Toshiro's anger decided to surface at that point and his brain supplied the necessary focal points: Gin and Rangiku. "What do you mean? 'Hi'? 'How's it goin''? What are you two doing?! Better yet, why are you doing it in the office!?" he practically shouted.
He was quite surprised when all Rangiku did in the face of his anger was smile slightly, but he didn't let it show. That is, until she leaned closer to Gin and said "He's so red." In fact, he was taken aback and did indeed take a step backwards.
"Awe yeah, very red," Gin said in reply, tilting his head in her direction.
"Success?" she asked.
"He's so cute!" she almost squealed.
Now Toshiro was a bit confused, but he did know they were making fun of his embarrassment. He was going to say something about it too, but instead he quickly covered his eyes with his right hand, put his right foot back, and held out his left hand almost like he was blocking something as Rangiku stood up, leaving the blanket behind.
"What?" she asked. "I'm not naked."
"Yeah, neither am I," Gin said, voice carrying hints of mirth.
Toshiro timidly uncovered his eyes and saw an amused Rangiku squatted by the other couch and an amused Gin sitting cross-legged where he had been. What stuck him was the fact that they really were dressed, partially anyway. Rangiku was wearing a thick tan-colored band around her chest which sufficiently covered her cleavage and was still wearing her hakama. Gin was also still wearing his hakama, he didn't have a shirt, but that was somewhat ok considering he was male. Speaking of Gin's shirt, Rangiku reached under the couch, pulled out his robes and haori and tossed them to him. He started to put them on as she retrieved her own robes.
"Wha-what? I don't understand," Toshiro said, looking confused, but also a little relieved. They aren't naked, shoo, what a relief. But what were they talking about? He could see Rangiku suppressing giggles as she went behind the couch the clothes had been under to adjust her robes. Which left Gin, who was tucking in his shirt, to explain.
"Awe, kiddo," he said. "We set you up."
Toshiro's eyes widen slightly. "What?"
"See, we wanted to tease you, well, Rangiku said she wanted to see you flustered 'cause you're so serious all the time-"
"Hey! Way to throw me to the hollows!" came Rangiku's indignant voice.
"You know I'd never do that to ya, Ran! Anyway, and I wanted to embarrass you somehow, so I came up with this little scheme here. 'Course, it never woulda worked if Ran hadn't waited for the perfect moment."
"What?" Toshiro choked in disbelief.
Rangiku came out from behind the couch holding the band and dressed normally, minus the scarf. "You looking for me just made it all that much better."
Gin turned to her, with a slight pout. "I still think it would'a been better if he hadn't been looking for you and just stumbled acrosst us."
"Were you even asleep?" Toshiro asked suddenly.
Rangiku beamed, "Nope! We were pretending!"
"We were that good, uh?" Gin asked, shrugging on his captain's haori.
Toshiro slapped his forehead. Of course they had been faking it; otherwise they wouldn't have woken up at precisely the right time to catch me! Which means "Ran" was their signal!"
"And before you start thinking too hard about things, when I said 'Ran' in my 'sleep' it was to add to the realism, it wasn't a code or anything," Gin said. He turned to Rangiku. "Snuggling was a nice touch by the way."
She put a hand to her chest as her other one reached for her scarf. "Was it? I'm flattered," she said.
Toshiro still couldn't believe it; that set up had merely been a prank, on him! And it had worked.
"Hey, Ran," Gin said, bringing Toshiro out of his little daze.
"You might not want to let 'im leave the office, unless, that is, he wants people to see 'im pink in the face."
"I am not-!" Toshiro started but he was cut off by Rangiku.
"He's right, captain. You're still pink," she said adjusting the scarf which was now on her shoulders.
Gin pointed at said scarf. "About this pink!" he said cheerfully.
Toshiro's eyes widened again, but then he furrowed his eyebrows and went over to his desk, determined to try to push this little incident to the back of his mind. Rangiku laughed while Gin chuckled. The two adults then cleaned up their staged set. Well, some of the sake bottles might not have been staged. After that little chore was done, Gin waved bye and left the room, while Rangiku went over to her desk.
"Guess I should make some of this up by doing some paperwork, right?" she said sitting down.
Toshiro just nodded stiffly as he concentrated on his paperwork. Rangiku smiled, eyes crinkling in hidden laughter as she got to work; the boy was still very pink.
A/N: Since this is my first story, I would be exstatic if you would review. So, feel free!