Disclaimer: I do not own NBC's Revolution.
Charlie always wanted something from the world. Some days it was her dead mother holding her hand, Danny to breathe easier, or simply her dad to have courage. The world only answered with more pain. Another woman coming into their home, she will never be my mother, Danny coughing into the night, and her father standing with open hands.
But. Charlie never knew true life changing grief until the day her father died in front of her and Danny, brother, was ripped beyond her sight and life. She drew out the beaten pack and threw in whatever she could find. Weapons to guard herself from unseen enemies. Charlie never wanted Aaron or Maggie. The world gave her them anyway.
Maybe she was a little too trusting, naïve, but when Nate saved her she wanted to trust him. Men in her life never were her protector. When she was little her father was the one who conquered her nightmare with a word and a flashlight, but when the lights went out her father became the weak one. Her mother showed her what it meant to be strong, what it meant to love. Danny, as much as she loves him, is not a protector. Charlie is the one who watches his chest rise, looking for the smallest hiccup. Aaron, the teacher, her father's friend will never be more than that.
So when Nate rips the men away from her she allows him the smallest piece of her life. She learns to regret that.
It's when she meets Miles that she understands what it means to feel safe with someone. "Good at killing people" is all she knows about him. She couldn't picture his face, her father's eyes replacing the imagined Uncle Miles.
Before she even knew who he was she recognized his strength. The way he hid behind quips, but his stance was guarded and aware. For a moment she imagined possibilities with this man that she had never given into before, Nate being the half hearted exception, this man knew what it was like to lose someone. This man she wouldn't need to protect. And for that moment she asked the world for a selfish wish. The world answered in a cruel joke.
Fighting beside Miles was exhilarating. She suspected that no matter how long she worked or lived she would never move like he does. He was water against the ground. Good at killing people. It was an accurate and too small description for him. He was more powerful than she had realized. His strength was in making people forget that.
Miles wasn't perfect. For all that he was her Uncle she knew nothing about him. He disappointed her, but he would always come back for her. It was getting him to realize that she wasn't going to leave him that was hard. She won't run away from his past, as much as it shocked and hurt her. Because Miles was family and he and Danny were all she had left in this world. So when his eyes rests on her body or when his hands touch her arm, shoulder, hands she learns to ignore the heat. When she hears him with Nora she fights the irrational red that flashes in her eyes.
Miles is the answer to her grief. Miles is the one who is going help her get Danny back. Miles is the man who trains her and protects her. Miles gives her safety in the wild world. Miles is the one man she has wanted and the one man she may never have. To ask the world for anything else would simply tempt it to take him away from her.