Alright guys, here it is…the ultimate grand finale of Total Drama Chaos.

Last time, on Total Drama Chaos! Our final three were told they were the Final Three and that the final was about to be underway. After a smorgasbord of traveling, where the finalists got to pick two helpers to help them for the remainder of the finale, the jetlagged contestants vied to be one of the first two people to get here, back to the Dock of Shame where it all began. We had a close call that was so close, we had to make it a cliffhanger! Who's in the Final Two, and who's going home saying "Boo-Hoo?" find out right here, right now on the grande finale of Total! Drama! Chaos!

"Courtney…" Chris's word hung on the air. He then paused and took a sip of water.

Eva lost at, as did most of the other campers, "Courtney WHAT?!" The fitness buff screamed over the rest of them as they all shouted at the host to get on with it.

Chris just laughed, seeing all the teens in agonizing wait, "Courtney…is…

in first place, and the first person in the Final Two!"

"YES!" Courtney shrieked, glomping the nearest person next to her, which happened to be Kasimar.

Kasimar just groaned as she continued squeezing the ever-loving life out of him.

Noah and Eva groaned as well, but for different reasons.

"And the person who came right after them, by just a hair, by just a smidgen, by just a teeny-weeny-itsy-beeny…"

"Just kill me now." Noah threw up his arms.

"the second person in the finale is…


Eva roared in victory as Izzy hooted excitedly and Kasimar grinned devilishly. Jo let out a shout of protest and Gwen just put a hand on a disappointed Noah's shoulder.

"Noah, that means you came in last, buddy, and you're out." Chris told him.

Noah heaved a deep sigh, wringing the water from his sweater vest.

Chris eyed this action, "I mean you can't be surprised, its impossible to win reality TV in a sweater vest."

"Real hilarious," Noah spat as he pried Gwen's hand off his shoulder, "well, it is what it is, are the others on the island for the finale?"

"Yeah, they're confined to the Mess Hall for the moment." Chris told him, "go shower off and stuff and you can join them."

Noah nodded dejectedly and strode off down the Dock, though he was heading in the opposite direction eliminated campers usually went, this bookworm, as he trudged towards the bathrooms, trying not to let the disappointment resonate on his normally neutral face.

Gwen sighed, "well this sucks!"

"Not for us!" Eva grinned broadly, crushing Izzy in a bear hug, "it's all thanks to Izzy and that firebomb that we made it."

Izzy grinned back at her friend, "glad I could help!"

"Alright, Courtney, Eva, congratulations on being our Final Two!" Chris grinned, "but be prepared, as this is a brutal challenge you two are about to face. However, at the end of this one of you will come out with five MILLION dollars!"

The two girls cheered, before glaring at each other. However, there was little hostility in the glare, and both girls faces broke out into smirks.

"You ready?"

"I'm ready if you are."

"Let's do it then."

"Do it we shall."

Noah stared at himself in the mirror of the bathroom, hair wet and a towel around his waist. He dropped his head and sighed. "So close…" he whispered to himself.

He jumped as he felt a pair of arms embrace him from behind. He could tell from the smallish hands, the placement of the head that nuzzled into his still wet back, and the flash of silvery blonde that entered his peripheral vision that his girlfriend had sought him out.

"I missed you," Dawn whispered to him, snuggling into his back.

Noah smirked, still leaning over the sink. He glanced up at his reflection and saw Dawn resting her chin on his spine, smiling slightly at him.

"This is the boys bathroom, you know." Noah said in a tone of mock-offense.

Dawn playfully pinched his ribs, making him involuntary gasp and knock her arm away. He turned around and gave her a proper hug, "I missed you too," he said into her hair, squeezing her tight.

They broke apart, and turned to see Duncan and Gwen grinning in the door way at them.

"Jesus Chris!" Noah exclaimed, making sure his towel was properly covering him, "I'll say again, this is the boy's bathroom!"

"Just kiss already," Gwen grinned.

"Yeah, like this," Duncan added, grabbing Gwen by the hips and sweeping her into a deep kiss that made Gwen go crimson.

Noah shifted Dawn so that she was directly in front of himself. He was effectively using her as a shield incase his towel fell.

"As classy as you two are, I think we prefer to keep our more intimate affections for a more private setting," Dawn smiled slightly.

Noah wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her close, putting his head onto of her head, "yeah!" he added with faux snottiness.

"Whatever," the punk rolled his eyes, "Chris wants your loser-ass at the Chriesseum in fifteen minutes."

Dawn's eyes widened, "he's bringing that back again?"

"Eva and Courtney duking it out, huh?" Noah grabbed his bundle of still wet clothes and made for the door, "I wouldn't miss it for the world. And is it bad I'm glad I'm out so I don't have to fight either of them?"

"Dude," Duncan laughed, clapping Noah on the shoulders, "I'm one tough SOB, and I'm glad I don't have to fight either of them."

"Alright, so here's how the next part of the finale is going to work," Chris said as a now dry Eva and Courtney stood on the dock, their partners flanked behind them.

"Next part? There's more after this?" Courtney asked in exasperation.

"Yes," Chris nodded, "this is the second-to-last part."

"Alright twinkle toes," Eva said impatiently, "how about you just explain it so I can win this!"

"Alright, geez," Chris chuckled as Courtney glared at Eva, "we'll be doing a part similar to the TDI finale, although it will be relay-style."

"Relay style?" Harold repeated, "like each of us helpers help too?"

"Correctamundo," Chris nodded, he gestured out to the camp, "the relay race will start here, at the Dock. This first part MUST be done by the partner you chose in Newfoundland. They will run from here to the Mess Hall and scarf down a pot of Chef's mystery meat. After that, they have to deliver twenty uppercuts on a training dummy, found in the Mess Hall, ALL with out puking. If you puke, its a ten minute penalty until you can try again."

"Ten minutes?" Brick gawped, "that's insane."

"Quit whining," Kasimar grunted, glad he had a tough stomach.

"After that, its a footrace to the cliff, where you'll tag your partner in, the one picked up in London. They'll slide back down the cliff in toboggans, and receive directions to the Chrisesseum. Once in the Chrisesseum, you will tag in either Eva or Courtney, and they'll get to work building their armor in a dramatic beatdown that will be told throughout the ages!"

"Alright," Izzy cheered, "let's do this!"

"We're going to crush you," Kasimar leered at Courtney.

"Why do you care?" Was Courtney's retort, "You don't win anything even if Eva wins."

"I just want to see you go down," Kasimar smirked.

"Alright, quit fighting kiddos, its time to start this challenge!" Chris grinned, he pulled out his trusty airhorn and gave it a quick blast, and Kasimar and Brick ran for the Mess Hall.

Brick, being the more athletic of the two, entered the Mess Hall first, but Kasimar wasn't far behind.

On the table were two pots of steamy, disgusting smelly meat.

Brick looked down at the pot, and it seemed like the pot belched at him, causing a noxious cloud of green gas to make his eyes water.

"Oh dear lord," Brick coughed, covering his eyes, "that's not right."

Kasimar looked down at the pot and groaned.

(Confessional: Kasimar.)

Kasimar: Oh come on, why did Brick and I get the horrifically gross challenge? I'd take tobogganing down a cliff over this any day. At least during the race you'd be able to sabotaging people. *He winces and taps his head* What, no dirty work? But-I-ugh, *he frowns and crosses his arms, pouting* fine. You're no fun, Mike.

(End Confessional: Kasimar.)

Brick closed his eyes and was stuffing spoonful after spoonful down his throat, gagging and choking but managing to keep it all down. Kasimar could only watch in awe and slight horror as he slowly but surely drained the pot.

Thinking quickly, Kasimar ran into the kitchen. The camera focused on Brick eating his pot, but the sounds of Kasimar rummaging around in the drawers was heard. "Got it!" came a cry, and Kasimar ran back into the dining area with a large, neon orange funnel. He pounded his chest to pump himself up and grunted. "Manitoba, you're the one with the iron stomach, help me out here."

Kasimar's eyes glazed over, and they changed from grim to cocky as they refocused.

"Alright, Shiela's," Manitoba grinned, tipping his hat…only there was no hat to tip. He looked upwards in surprise, "how on Earth am I kicking around here without my trusty fedora? Eh, no matter, time to chug the good stuff." He put the funnel in his mouth, and lifted the pot up over the rim of the funnel.

Chugging it down through a funnel, it wasn't long until he was done. Brick was done too, though, and more determined than ever.

The camera cut to their two faces, mouths covered in mystery meat, as they both grinned. "Done!"

With two punching bags over in the corner of the Mess Hall, it didn't take long for the two boys to locate them and began slamming their fists into them. Brick was much faster than Manitoba, and thus finished long before Manitoba reached twenty punches.

"See you later, solider!" Brick cheered, running out the door.

Manitoba grunted and finished his remaining punches. "It ain't over till its over, mate!" he called, running after the cadet.

Izzy and Harold stood atop the cliff, squinting down it to try and see what was going on.

"You see anything?" Harold asked Izzy, who was using her hands as binoculars.

"Nope," Izzy said cheerfully, "but I think they'll be here soon."

A large gust of wind blew by, and Harold shivered, "I hope so, its chilly up here." he whined.

"Woohoo!" Came a voice from a couple hundred feet down. It was still in the trees, but it was unmistakably Brick's voice.

"Yes!" Harold pumped his fist, grinning even wider when the solider-in-training burst out into the clearing, smirking victoriously. His smirk faded, however, when Svetlana burst out of the top of one of the trees, not fifty feet behind him. She fell back into the trees gracefully, and Harold knew she must be gaining on him.

"Hurry!" Harold cheered, holding his hand out to be tagged.

Brick ran up and tagged the nerd, "good luck, soldier!"

"Thanks Brick! Mission success!" Harold said cheekily as he grabbed one of the two toboggans and, putting caution to the wind, ran and slid belly first down the hill, cheering.

Brick sat down on a nearby rock, panting as he tried to recover his breath. It didn't help when Svetlana landed on him, doing an Olympic pose.

"My kiwis…" Brick squeaked, his voice a good octave higher than it used to be.

"Whoops, I wasn't seeing you there," Svetlana admitted, apologetic, "ta-ta! Yaaah!" she leapt off him and tagged Izzy, "go you crazy ginger, you! Win the gold for us!" Svetlana called as Izzy disappeared into the trees on her toboggan.

Svetlana gave a sharp gasp and Mike returned. "Whoa, Brick!" Mike took in his fallen friend, and his face grew sympathetic, "did Svetlana nail you in the kiwis again?"

Brick could only nod through grit teeth and tears.

Mike looked at the camera, trying not to look amused, "yeah, its the eight time thats happened. I think she likes him."

"Don't tell Jo that unless you want to end up in a body bag," Brick managed out, and the two friends shared a laugh.

"Here, let me help you up." Mike offered, and the two started slowly descending the cliff.

"Woohoo!" Izzy cackled, going up over a rock and flying through the air. She did a flip of her toboggan to avoid a snarling moose and landed perfectly, still grinning.

Harold was still ahead of Izzy, but at the rate Izzy was going she would catch up to him soon.

Harold screamed like a little girl as a tree came out of nowhere, and jerked his toboggan sharply to the side to avoid it. However, this put him in the way of another tree, and he screamed and jerked again to the side. And again. And again.

"Come on!" Harold shouted in frustration, swerving out of the way of what looked like a crashed alien spaceship, "why is there so much crap in the way!"

Izzy whooped as she high-fived the strange being coming out of the crashed ship. "This is awesome! Hahaha!"

Harold grinned as he saw the cabins in the distance, "almost there!" but his grin faded as Izzy slowly started to faze past him.

"See ya later!" Izzy waved at him as she slipped ahead, cackling.

"Not on my watch!" Harold proclaimed dramatically, urging his sled forwards.

The view cut to Shawn, relaxing on the roof of the Mess Hall, looking out over the cliff, waiting for the contestants to show.

"What a weird season its been." Shawn mused as he ate some chips from a bag, "coolest internship ever, though."

Shawn's attention was diverted as a cackling Izzy came out through the trees, skidding to a halt on the now flat ground and sending her fly forward, getting a face full of dirt for her troubles.

Shawn hopped down from the Mess Hall roof and sauntered over to her, "your next destination is at the elimination ceremony." he told her, "but hurry, I think Harold's coming!"

Izzy nodded, determined, and ran off towards the elimination ceremony.

Shawn reclined against a tree and waited for Harold. Sure enough, it wasn't long before the nerd came spiraling out of the woods, covering in dirt and screaming like a girl. Even out of control, the nerd was able to leap from the toboggan before it stalled on the flat ground, and thus landed somewhat graciously on his two feet. Getting his bearings and trying not to blow chunks, the nerd located Shawn and ran up to him.

"Dude, where do I gotta go?" He slurred, shaking his head in an attempt to clear it.

"Elimination ceremony, man!" Shawn told him, "look out for the undead, though."

"You got it!" Harold nodded, running off towards the elimination area.

Shawn went back to reclining on the roof of the Mess Hall.

Izzy had been at the elimination ceremony for a few minutes, looking around. She was puzzled, though, because as she recalled the Chrisesseum was huge, and it was nowhere in sight.

Harold walked up, looking just as puzzled as Izzy was, and began searching around.

"What did he tell you?" Harold asked, confused.

"Just that it was at the elimination area."


Brick and Mike walked up as well, "hey guys, what're you doing?" Mike asked curiously.

"Looking for the Chrisesseum, but I don't know where it is."

"Maybe it was a riddle?" Brick said, still struggling to walk because of his gonad injury. He leaned against the barrel Chris usually took behind and it fell over, revealing a hole with a ladder leading deep into the ground.

The shot cut to the hole's perspective as Brick, Izzy, Kasimar and Harold looked down it.

"Gosh, you don't think?" Harold gawped.

Izzy was already climbing down, "only one way to find out!" she whooped.

Harold was soon to follow, and a struggling Brick and hesitant Mike clambered down after them.

The shot cut to the Chrisesseum. It was deep underground, and currently Chris, Chtheef, Rodney, Sky, and all the eliminated campers sans the ones climbing down the ladder right now were seated in the stands.

Eva and Courtney stood amidst the massive piles of junk in the arena itself, waiting for their partners to show up.

A spotlight was shown on the ladder as the first foot came into view.

"Woohoo!" Izzy cheered, running down the carved out path from the ladder to the arena, she saw Eva waiting and picked up the pace.

"As soon as Eva gets tagged in, she can start making armor. As soon as Eva gets tagged, the twenty minute timer starts going off. Once the timer reaches zero, the battle will begin. The first person to get pinned under the other person for a total of five seconds is the winner of Total Drama Chaos!"

At that moment Eva got tagged in by Izzy, and the hulking brute started going through the nearest junk pile, looking for anything of use.

"Can we help build stuff?" Izzy asked excitedly.

"Nope!" Chris answered, you and Harold are done here, but Brick and Kasimar can help if they so desire.

The rest of the helpers, plus Shawn, had arrived, and the two boys overheard what Chris said.

"Its my duty and honor." Brick saluted.

Mike grinned, "I'll give it my all!"

Harold tagged Courtney in, "good luck!" he smiled, before making his way with Izzy and Shawn up to the stands.

Cheering started echoing throughout the stadium as Brick, Courtney, Mike and Izzy began working.

What exactly they were building was kept hidden until the final battle, but it is okay to say that Brick was very good at creating the right armor to help against Eva's hefty blows. It also didn't hurt that the cadet knew his way around ranged weapons, either.

Mike didn't prove to be a whole lot of help when it came to creative ingenuity, but he could follow Eva's directions well enough to create some shoddy armor.

(Confessional: Eva.)

Eva: This is it. The final battle, I can taste the victory! Finally I'll have my chance to shine!

(End Confessional: Eva.)

(Confessional: Courtney.)

Courtney: Now I can finally show everyone what I'm capable of, and win this dumb game! This is it!

(End Confessional: Courtney.)

Twenty minutes went by in the blink of an eye.

Twenty seconds read on the clock, and Courtney and Eva stood in the open area, covered in their makeshift armor.

Courtney was clad in a duct tape and hard plastic chest plate. Her legs were also taped with foam and hard plastic. She had a rusty bucket as a helmet and a cracked baseball bat at her belt.

Her real beauty, though, was a makeshift gun which fired hard rubber balls. She had six balls for ammo, but could reshoot them if she could get her hands on them after she fired.

Eva was clad in minimal armor, and had instead focused on a weapon. Her beauty was several planks of wood nailed together tied with a metal rod for a handle. It wasn't pretty, but it was a damn effective great sword.

"You're not gonna wanna get a direct hit from that." Brick said nervously as Eva swung her sword around viciously, grinning.

Courtney nodded, determined. "I've been working with Eva all season, I know her weaknesses."

"5!" Chris counted down, as the cheering from the ex contestants grew more intense.

"4!" Brick and Mike left the stadium.

"3!" Courtney swallowed her nerves, gripping her makeshift pistol tightly.

"2!" Eva swung her broadsword around, muscles tightening under her thin plastic armor.

"1!" The shot cut out to overview of the arena.


Eva wasted no time, darting forward with blitzing speed and hacking a great cleave with her sword at Courtney.

Courtney leapt easily out of the way of the slow, heavy strike and shoulder rammed into the fitness buff, but it was like crashing against a truck, and Courtney was the one to stumble back.

Eva took this opportunity to push Courtney onto her back, and placed her foot on her chest "too easy!" she grinned as she looked down on the girl.

Courtney, gasping as she felt the air leave her chest, pulled her gun and shot a large rubber ball right at Eva's nose.

"OW!" Eva bellowed, clutching her nose but still keeping her foot down. However, with her attention diverted on her face, it was easy for Courtney to fire another ball right into Eva's stomach and knock her leg off her before the count got to "Two".

Courtney leapt up to her feet and released her base ball bat. Cracking it across Eva's face, the fitness buff roared in pain and took a blind swing with her sword, forcing Courtney to leap back.

The two girls took a deep breath, surveying each other with more apprehension.

They charged at the same time Courtney ducking under Eva's swing and hacking at her leg, but Eva was expecting it and used the handle of her sword to deflect the blow. Using her immense strength, she shoved Courtney back with just the handle and did a faster, less powerful swing that hit Courtney full force in the stomach.

The armor did its job, though, and Courtney just felt a slight twinge.

Gritting her teeth, Courtney slammed the baseball bat down on the handle of the sword, splitting the tape that connected the metal rod to the wood. The wood clattered to the ground and Eva drove the metal rod into Courtney's helmet, denting and splitting the rusty metal.

Courtney staggered back, taking the destroyed helmet off and throwing it at Eva. The throw caught Eva by surprise and she caught it in the chest, staggering back.

Courtney took this moment to dart forward and shover her shoulders into the off-balanced Eva, knocking her to the ground.

Courtney then did something she never thought she would do in her life.

She bellyflopped on Eva.

Eva grunted in pain as the full weight of Courtney slammed onto her.

"One," Courtney said, pressing eva's head down with her chest and hands, "two…three…four…"

Eva let out a scream of rage, thrashing Courtney off of her and springing to her feet.

Courtney was on her feet just as quick, and prepared herself of the onslaught.

"I WILL NOT LOSE!" Eva thundered, diving at Courtney and hoisting the metal rod.

Eva swung at Courtney, but her strikes started to become predictable, as her incensed attacking style compensated accuracy and speed for power.

Courtney started to calm down the more predictable the strikes became, and it wasn't long before she dodged under one of Eva's punches and drove two fingers an inch deep into Eva's throat.

Eva's eyes bulged and she coughed, stopping dead in her tracks and bringing her hands up to her throat, staggering backwards as she struggled to breathe.

This time Courtney's shoulder ram was effective, and Eva hit the dust, still coughing and hacking.

Courtney grinned as she sat down on top of Eva. "One…two…three."

Eva bucked her hips and raised her left hand in a punch towards Courtney, but Courtney slapped it aside and delivered a smack of her own to Eva's face, dazing her.


"And Courtney is the winner of Total Drama Chaos!" Chris boomed, and the crowd erupted into a mixture of polite applause, vivid cheering and a couple of heinous boos.

"YES!" Courtney jumped up, "I DID IT! I WON!"

Eva, now with her breath back, gave a long howl of angered misery. After that though, she calmly stood up and offered her hand to Courtney.

They shook.

"Good game," Eva's tone was more ashamed then anything.

"Good game," Courtney smiled back.

"Alright, let's get out of this dusty cave!" Chris smiled.

(Confessional: Eva.)

Eva: *Sighing sadly* Almost ironic, isn't it? Last time I was kicked out second, this time I get second. Agh, how did I lose to her? I was so much stronger than her!

(End Confessional: Eva.)

The shot cut to the thirty-eight campers, Blainley included, on the Dock of Shame.

"Here you go, Courtney!" Chris grinned, showing her five suitcase, each one identical to the one that usually holds the million dollars.

"Thank you, Chris," Courtney smiled, "this four million should be enough to see me through any law school of my choosing."

"Uh, you won five million." Jo pointed out.

"I know, but I'm splitting one million of it between all of you," Courtney announced, making everyone gasp. She smiled slightly, "think of it as a farewell gift, given that this is the last season."

Showers of applause and thanks rained down on the CIT, who waved a hand dismissively at them, "seriously, its the least I can do after being so horrible to everyone."

"I won't say no to 25,000 bucks." Harold grinned, thinking of all the nerdy stuff he was going to buy.

Chris grinned, referring to Courtney's earlier statement "Oh yes, with this season, Total Drama gets put to bed. Time for me to retire as a multi, multi millionaire."

A fancy yacht docked at the Dock of Shame.

"What's going to happen to Wawanakwa now?" Noah asked as the contestants started to board the yacht.

Chris shrugged, "who knows, I might turn it into a hotel or something. Now on the boat with you!"

Once everyone, including Sky, Shawn, Rodney and Chef, had boarded the yacht, Chris turned to the camera, grinning. "Well folks, I hope you all enjoyed the last season of Total Drama, its been a good one! After all the pain, laughs, tears, and love we finally have our five-million dollar winner. This is Chris McLean signing off the final episode of Total! Drama! Chaos!" He boarded the yacht and it sped off into the distance.


Elimination Order: Blainley, Staci, Beth, LeShawna, Cameron, Sierra, B, Lindsay (1), Sam, Izzy (1), Scott, Zoey, Katie, DJ, Bridgette, Anne Maria, Lightning, Heather, Alejandro, Duncan, Owen, Cody, Sadie, Dawn, Brick, Geoff, Mike, Izzy (2), Kasimar, Trent, Jo, Lindsay (2), Ezekiel, Tyler, Dakota, Justin, Gwen, Harold.

Third Place: Noah.

Runner-Up: Eva.

Winner: Courtney.

Okay, Courtney haters, don't kill me. HEAR ME OUT. I BEG YOU. Stop typing that flame and just listen up. Firs up, Eva WILL be getting an alternate ending IN the next chapter, which is a "Five years later" epilogue. That should be up in about an hour or so.

So, up until around the time the teams first swapped into the Screaming Rats and Killer Maggots, Noah was planned to be the winner. Then I realized it'd be too cheap to have him be the winner with him being my favorite character and all, so I made him place third. The question was, who would win? Who would be that winner?

I didn't want some goody-two-shoes winning either, like Harold, Justin, Trent, Gwen, Tyler, Lindsay, etc etc.

That left the neutrals. People like Jo, Ezekiel, Eva and Courtney, etc etc.

So I eventually decided that Courtney would be the winner, for several reasons:

1) I actually feel she deserves a win, but only if she plays the game the right way.

2) I made her play that game. Being crueler earlier on but joining an alliance and eventually struggling with morals, only to cinch it all.

3) I wanted a girl to win TDC (and for it to be an all-female final two).

4) Courtney is a character I dislike. Like, a lot. She's probably in my bottom twenty.

So yeah, you guys probably won't be all that happy with it, but I'd put money on Courtney beating Eva in a fight like that all day any day.

I feel the biggest bone of contention will be how Courtney won, and I assure you, as someone who took karate for four years and seen many a karate accident, I've seen 120lb 5'2 guys accidentally nail some guy three times their size in the throat, and its not even a HARD strike, and they're down for the count, and I mean down down.

Love it or hate it, this is how it ends.

I'll be more sappy at the end of the next chapter, which will be up soon.

Please let me know your thoughts on this guys, I'll take the criticsm and am expecting it, I know Courtney was NOT a fan favorite but sorry, I'm sticking to my guns.

Until the last chapter, guys, I'll see you later