(A/N This is the second one shot ive written. Hope you enjoy.)

Max stared down glumly at her left arm. The entire thing was covered in green highlighter, spelling out words and circling eraser burns.








Those were only a few of the words. They were just thoughts Max had had throughout the day, ones that would drive her insane if she didn't let them out some how. And this way was better than the other option.

Max hadn't eaten properly in at least a week, and hadn't slept properly in longer than that. She had horrible headaches from it, but even the thought of food made her feel sick. Contributing to her headaches, Iggy and Gazzy were constantly on her case about it. Iggy thought it was morbid, and Gazzy just used it as a joke.

Neither of them really cared. Nudge had been texting her pretty much every ten minutes asking if she was ok, until Max wondered if they had put her on suicide watch or something. But no, they wouldn't. They were too worried about J.J, who had made no effort to disguise her depression and had everyone worried.

Not Max. She had a good mask. It would slip sometimes, but before anyone got really concerned, it was back in place and they went on with their lives.

Little did they know how Max had stood in the shower the night before, desperately scrubbing at her arm, trying to make the words wash away. It worked, for awhile. She knew they would be back. They always came back.

They didn't know how she had lain in bed with a knife in her hand, poising it over her heart before she snapped back into reality and threw it across the room. They didn't know how Max had felt when Ella talked about how J.J was considering suicide.

Max would try her hardest to help J.J, even though shes gone farther and done worse.

No one would know how guilty Max felt seeing everyone around her so happy, how she knew she couldn't ruin it for them. No one would know how torn and angry she was inside, how hollow.

No one would ever have to know.

Until its too late.

(A/N I know, I know. Depressing as hell.)