A:N/: Woohoo! Idea!
Before you read, just to let you know, I envisioned the groundhog as if he was from the Gold Rush. Get it? Like mining?... Fine.
Anyway, I just was thinking about Bunnymund's reaction to the Groundhog. And I always like my lil' plots...
Disclaimer: I don't own this. If I did, my hormones would take over and make Jack run around shirtless.
(Yeah, I couldn't think of a better title. Suck it up and read the story already! Please!)
Jack had always known that there were other beings out there that weren't human nor Guardian. For three-hundred years, he was one of them. He always knew there were no fewer than ten of these enigmatic beings, though he rarely ever encountered any of them.
They did have the entire globe to patrol, after all.
Jack, by the time he had been the Guardian of all things fun for a year, had met most of these immortal beings. They all stood out in the crowd; Mrs. Claus, the rugged wife of North. She could bring her cookies to life and force them to attack anything. It didn't sound terrifying, and it wasn't, but the reindeer that she commanded...
Jack shuddered as he strolled through the halls of his ice palace he was constructing. He was still lost in thought as he added a brushstroke of frost there and a bit more snow here.
Cupid was another one of these creatures. But the diapered man preferred his other name – Heartbreaker, which suited him (he was basically Aphrodite incarnate; though he didn't just make love, he tore couples apart savagely. And he enjoyed it. Love seemed to be a toy to him). Heartbreaker carried an enormous bow with a few arrows tipped in strong love potions – or drugs, in Jack's opinion – around, and shot them into the butts of couples he saw across the globe.
Another... unique... person that the frostling knew was a tiny little Irish man, who was once known as St. Patrick. Though he underwent a transformation; he became a scrawny wee migit with red hair and a pipe in his mouth. Jack had been flying around, creating a pleasant hailstorm for Ireland, when he collided with this shrimp, who was riding across a rainbow, manipulating the beam of color's courses and actions.
But the one that confused a being that wasn't even remotely human – at least he didn't look like it.
It was a groundhog. Not just a groundhog, but The Groundhog, the one that popped out of its hole in February, saw its shadow, screamed, and hid back underground for another six weeks.
Never before would one expect that this fluffy coward could possess so much power.
Jack didn't even know that the groundhog was a Guardian-like being up until that point. Jack had been furnishing a wall by the pond he drowned in when, in an explosion of dirt, a brown blob scurried out of a hole in the ground.
It wasn't Bunnymund; that was why Jack was running on the wind the moment he saw it. Jack was hovering a good thirty feet above the ground, observing the damage (only a wall had fallen, fortunately).
He then noted the groundhog in all his glory.
The Groundhog was no longer a myth from Jack's friends mouths. He was a muscular, bipedal creature that was surveying the damage he had created.
"Howdy there! Sorry there for spookin' ya! Come down here, will 'ya?" The groundhog talked with a thick, Westernized drawl. "Gotya a message here from the Guardians! Come on, pardner!"
Jack was clutching his staff as if it was a lifeline. Gradually, he shrank down to the earth. "Who are you?"
"Hmph! Haven't heard 'a me? I'm the Great Groundhog!" 'Great Groundhog' said, pride staining his voice.
Jack cocked in eyebrow in the least.
"Name's Buck Burrows!"
Jack stood in front of the Buck, who extended a clawed hand.
Or, what looked like a clawed hand. Buck, technically, looked like he had tiny, fuzzy paws. There were just strange gloves with three sharp claws extending from the dirty leather. Jack glanced up at the rest of his body; he was just a fuzzy little groundhog, only faintly more human. His back was straightened, his chest puffed out. His muzzle was poked into the air, and four razor-sharp fangs poked out from under his lip.
"Can't'cha talk, lil' one? Anyway, come on! We gotta meet the rat at his Outback egg hole," Buck grumbled the last sentence under his breath.
The Guardian shook the questions free from his head. "Oh! Hi! Jack! Anyway, what does Bunnymund want?"
"Ah, said sometin' 'bout a egg crisis. Wants ta see you and your sweetheart at the palace 'a his in a few minutes. Come on, we'll take a shortcut," and with one fell swoop, the groundhog had knocked Jack off his feet and into the hole that had damaged Jack's spa room wall.
The tunnel was dark. And muddy.
"Where am I going, exactly?" Jack hollered behind him as he shuffled a few feet forward.
"Just crawl on, pardner! Moles'll help ya in a few moments!" Buck sure had a mouth to yell.
Jack muttered something to himself and crawled forward. He dragged his staff along, making the process much harder.
The tunnel slowly began to widen, and when a few more minutes passed, it was roomy enough for both Jack and Buck to stand. "Now what? We just walk?"
"Not quite, lil' pardner! Hold on to your lil' stick there, might lose it."
It was official. The groundhog may have had some serious burrowing powers, but he was insane and belonged in a straight jacket. Without his little furry suit on.
There was a clinking sound in the distance. The Guardian of Fun swore as he jumped backwards, sharp spikes shooting out of the ground. Then, as Jack lowered his arms away from his face once he was sure that no harm was coming his way, a railroad track was built before his eyes.
Another series of clanking sounds echoed through the cavern and a mine car appeared before his eyes, made of sparkling gold. "She's a gal, ain't she?"
Jack jumped three feet out of his skin as Buck passed him up, throwing his weight into the cart. Jack shuddered as he realized why Bunnymund didn't particularly care for this immortal; not only was he loud and annoying, but he also likely tore the egg-laying and dye-spitting plants' roots into oblivion.
"Keep and paws, arms, feet and legs inside the car at all time, lady, gent, and groundhog! Here we go!" Buck shouted.
Jack involuntarily clutched the outside of the sparkling car.
If Santa's freaking sleigh ride was a hell-destined death machine, there was no telling what this underground machine could do.
The youngest Guardian clenched his fist that was holding onto his stick tighter, praying to all the deities that controlled his ice powers that he wouldn't lose this. His other hand seemed as if it was glued to the metal cart as the car groaned into the deep tunnel.
He felt himself slide backwards, and the snapping of a chain as the car traveled upwards.
Jack, against his will, sat up and peered over the edge. He swallowed.
Though the core of the earth wasn't visible, it was likely buried under an inch of dirt that was thousands of feet below them. He felt something hard collide with his head, and as he jerked back, he glared at the groundhog. "I guess this means keep all your bodily parts and possessions inside the car at all times, young'in."
The cart continued to groan upwards. Jack was growing impatient; they had to be traveling up to the peak out Mt. Everest at this rate. "Buck, when is this cart going to go down, exactly?" Jack muttered, feeling somewhat sick to his stomach with worry.
"Not anytime on this here ride," Buck replied. "Like I said, gotta pick up that gal 'a yours before we head over to the bunny's place."
Jack growled. That wasn't a response. "When are we going to get to Tooth's place?"
"Learn some patience, and in the meantime, this cart's 'a goin' to stop. Her place is just up there," Buck pointed with his steel claws. Jack slowly peered over the top of the cart, spying a tunnel entrance that they were rapidly nearing.
The cart groaned to a stop, and the fat groundhog muttered something to himself about his claws needing sharpening as he fiddled with them, obviously preparing them for quite a dig.
The moment the deathtrap halted to an abrupt stop, Buck hauled himself out of the cart, and before the Guardian of All Things Fun could blink, the mole was tunneling upwards.
Now would be a good time to bolt.
Just as he was gathering his bearings, a bolt of rainbow collided with his field of vision.
The young Guardian shrieked and blindly flung a snowball at the sudden color explosion, but Toothiana's giggling confirmed that the wall wasn't a threat.
"Hey Jack!" Tooth was then fluttering in front of Jack's eyes, laughing much like a school girl as she buried her face into his neck.
"Hey Tooth," he replied, slinging his free arm around her neck.
"Alright, lasses and men! Come along now!" Buck had landed in the cart's casket with a thud, shaking the crystal car. "Here we go!"
Buck tapped the crystalline beauty three times with his claws, then whispered 'Bunnymund' to nothing in particular. The car lurched forward, and Jack's senses failed him as the mining car took off.
A:N/: I'll continue when I wanna. Or when I get a decent amount of reviews/follows/favorites. Alright, bye, read and freaking review!