Here is my promised America fanfic. Rated M for sexual themes, nothing too explicit though, and swearing. I didn't want to put much detail in, because I'm not sure I want to ever write a lemon and publish it. I mean, if my followers ask me, I might, but at the moment I refuse to.

America may seem very OOC, but I based this off of a headcanon I saw, so it's not my fault. Also, this is VERY short, and I apologize. I'd rather it was longer, but it didn't want to be longer.

Don't own Hetalia, and never will.

. .

"Dudes! Hey, listen up, bro! I have a totally awesome plan you gotta hear!"

England, who had been arguing with France, sighed. "America, we don't want to hear another of your bloody idiotic plans. They never work, anyway."

Shit… "But, dude, it's gonna work! You'll be my back up, and – "

"As much as I hate saying it, Angleterre is right…" France sighed dramatically. "Amerique, your plans – "

"Are awesome!" America frantically interrupted. "You don't give them a chance!"

"Can we please stop the yelling?" Russia calmly asked. "I am getting a headache."

Shit, damn, fuck… "Yeah, actually, dude, I gotta go, um, places. Bye, bro!" He rushed out, not even taking his papers with. He didn't even leave the building, simply went to the bathroom.

Shit, shit, fuck… America locked himself in a stall, yanking down his pants and grabbing himself.

He couldn't help it. Those damn sexy nations and their damn sexy accents. He couldn't listen to them too long, they turn him on.

Someone opened the bathroom door, and he froze, leaning against the wall for support.

"Ve – America was acting weird, huh, Germany?"

"Ja, he rushed out and left all of his things."

"I wonder why he did that! Ve – Germany, maybe he went to get a kitty!" he giggled.

Fuck… Why did they need to come in now?!

Germany grumbled something, and one of the faucets turned on. America forced himself to be completely still and quiet until he was sure they were gone. Then he quickly finished up and exited the bathroom, sneaking back to the meeting room to grab his things before he hastily left the building.

The whole way home he cursed all the countries and their damn sexy accents.

. .

The actual headcanon is from kheprisun on Tumblr. I, of course, own nothing of it. Review and tell me what you think of this miserably short fanfiction.