4"It's difficult, it's sad, it's regrettable, that I want to stop,and yet I'm not even allowed to do that, but only keep on losing more."
Rin could see someone around the corner. Dang. No privacy for her there. She sighed and ran to the park. That's where she usually stayed until 'they' came.
'They' being a group of boys who would abuse the younger kids there.
She hated them.
And everyone.
And pretty much everything.
Why?
Because they were all filled with hate.
2:30. 'They' came at around this time. Rin sat on the swing and placed her bag nearby, her short blonde hair waving with the wind. Her white dress floated as she started swinging back and forth in small swings.
And here 'they' come.
'They' consists of Kaito, Gakupo, and Len.
Len is Rin's twin brother.
She glared at him with hate. Hate hate hate.
"Hello." She stated coldly. Len turned his head in mock surprise.
"Hello sister." He said, snarling her way. "How was your day?"
"Fine brother. And yours?" she spat. "I suppose you had fun?"
"Of course it was. Am I to assume you stayed in school all day?"
"Of course."
And it would continue like this until one of the other's friends would intervene, cutting in to drag them apart from wringing the other's neck. Then they would turn away from each other and head home.
Everyday.
It sucked.
Rin would come home first, flouncing in happily, like nothing ever happened.
"Hello dear! How are you?" Her mother would call out, oblivious to her daughter's inner ranting.
"I'm fine. I'll be upstairs doing homework." She would reply, lightly hopping over to the stairs. Up she would go. When she would reach her room, Len would come in, acting as innocent as ever.
"Hello Len, how was your day?"
"Fine. I'll do my homework now."
Same routine.
Rin would meet Len upstairs. They would acknowledge each other. Then part.
It's too painful, it's too detestable, it's futile, that I want to erase all, abandon anything and everything, fly off, and make an clamorous outcry.All this was done without their mother knowing.
Rin entered her room. Sitting at her desk was a hardcover notebook. Her diary. She opened it and read her writing.
Without understanding anything,you run through the town at saying anything to you,I merely keep on watching. Some cheap words have been lined up,but just where is the goal? The rules are not over there,but are weakly decaying.
She sighed, her head in her hands.
"God Len... Why?" She whispered. This had started just this school year. He would hang out with Kaito and Gakupo, slowly being influenced by them to do evil things.
When night came, Rin sat on her orange bed, staring out the frozen window pane. She narrowed her eyes as she saw her brother jumping out the window next door. He landed on the cement, his knees buckling slightly. Then he ran off. Rin huffed and grabbed a sweater from her closet, opened her window and followed him silently. As she watched, Len turned into a coffee shop and there he met Kaito and Gakupo. Ugh. She turned and headed into the bookstore across the street. She would watch him there. As she sat reading, a soft purr came from her foot. Rin looked down and saw a small tabby cat. It was brushing against her leg twining it's tail around her ankle. Does this song have a meaning? This verse has no meaning. Is this song sinful? This verse is not sinful. Does that song have a meaning? That verse has no meaning. Is that song sinful? The sin of that verse is...
"It seems she's taken a liking to you." A voice said. Rin glanced up. A pink haired woman stared down to her. "Shouldn't you be in bed?" She asked. Rin shrugged.
"My parents are okay with it."
"Okay. Would you like to keep the cat? It followed me here, and I can't take care of it right now, so would you like it?" The lady asked. Rin stared down at the cat.
"Sure." She said. "I should get going now." The pink haired lady nodded, and turned away. Rin scooped up the cat and headed out. She walked down the street to her home. Tired of the silence, the young blonde started talking to the cat.
"I hate this. Len keeps lying about everything. And he say's it's all okay. But NOOO. I don't care if he lies. I'll crush his stupid sinful deeds. I promise that!"
And then I start to talk:
"I will correct everything in this world."
And I try to deceive the cat: "I will be able to correct everything." Brandishing an impossible promise, I indulge in knows and understands,so today, too...You will be exposed, be shattered,become rusty, and rot away,and even the absurd gossips will be washed away and become truths. Lies are fine, I don't care, because we are the correct ones here, and therefore we will completely crush your deeply sinful immoralities.The cat simply stared and stretched out it's legs. It jumped out of Rin's arms and landed on the road, meowing as it padded along side her. Then it stopped and turned around.
"Where are you going!" Rin called out. Then she ran after the cat. "You're just like him! Aren't you!" She screamed. "You don't care huh!" She caught up with the feline and grabbed it by it's neck. The cat writhed and scratched at her, but Rin simply held on fast. She walked slowly and purposefully to the nearby pond. Her arms were scratched and bloodied, but that was okay. She was one step closer to fulfilling her promise. The cat's movements were getting weaker and weaker. Once she got to the pond, she threw the cat in. As it tried to swim, Rin grabbed a stick and shoved the cat in. Eventually, the cat stopped moving, and Rin let go. The limp body floated down the stream. She breathed hard and turned around.
"No... I'm not like them... I CAN'T be like them..." She murmured, falling to her knees. Her hands were a deep red, stained with blood, and tattered with dirt. She was just like them. Just like Len, and the people she hated.
People filled with hate. And then I come to a realization, that I should not create anything after all. What is the value of your life?-Just a stray cat, whom I've thrust into a pond. To some empty meaningless words, I dance and wave about, until I lose is "good"? What is "evil"? I don't know anything anymore. Now, let's go mad together! For what do I sing? Paradichlorobenzene. I just sing without understanding why. Paradichlorobenzene. We crush evil, and brandish justice. Paradichlorobenzene. As we stop wandering we don't realize our foolish deeds. It's not possible, it's not forgivable, and it won't stop, this feeling of mine. This pain and this detest strike right through my heart. It's difficult, it's sad, it's futile, that I want to erase all, and yet I'm not even allowed to do that, because only renunciation will save me now.
"Hello brother. How was your day?" She whispered, just loud enough for Len to hear it. Her twin just stared at her with confusion.
"Rin? Are you okay?"
"No! NO! I'm NOT OKAY!" She cackled, scaring Len. She stood, swaying back and forth. "I've sinned! Nothing is as it seems!" She laughed, giggling and sighing as if she had made the funniest joke in the world. "Come on Len! Let's go insane! It's fun isn't it! It's what you've been doing right!? Let's go Let's go!"
Len held her wrists, stopping her from swaying insanely.
"Rin! You must be sick. We need you to get some help somehow. Cu-"
"NO! NO! NOTHING WILL SAVE ME! JuST nOTHinG BUT sIMPLE fUN!" Len let go and Rin started spinning. Spinning in circles.
No one noticed the car until it was too late. Lies are fine, I don't care, let's forgive, let's give acceptance. We're so mad that it seems like we can embrace even laughter and jealousy.
"What happened."
"Erm.. Your son and daughter are at Voca-hospital currently. Both were hit by a Honda Odyssey..."
'WHAT!"
"Please report to room 504 and 505 for medical records and such."
A dial tone sounded from the speaker. Lily Kagamine slowly put down the phone, her hands shaking. She had to force herself to move to the door.
The ride was a complete blur. When she got to the hospital, the lady at the desk smiled at her.
"How may I help you?" She said cheerily.
"Room 504 and 505." The lady's face fell, and she swiftly pointed in the direction of the rooms. Lily walked through the sterile halls, her high heels clicking against the tile floors. When she got to the rooms, Lily gasped in horror. Both Rin and Len were bruised and battered, and Rin's hands and arms were scratched and red. A nurse turned in surprise and drew the curtains that hid both 14 year olds from sight. The blonde woman fell to her knees as she heard faint beeping sounds
slowly
but surely
slowing down.
Be it "good" or "evil", let's [kill] everything, and then fall into a slumber. I've had enough; I'm really tired now. Will we be saved?