Episode 2: Not-So-Bored Games

TIAW Mr. Coconut Beatle (that's short for TheImpossiblyAwesomeWriter) here! If you're reading this, it means the second episode has been rejuvenated as well, and is now an actual good story!

I remember uploading this, the same day as Episode 1, over a year ago. It took me forever to figure out how to use the Doc Manager. Ah, good times. Anyway, I present to you, the next chapter!

Disclaimer: I do not own or claim to own Total Drama or any of its characters. I am not making any profit from this fanfiction.

Chris stood on the Dock of Shame, grinning cheerfully. "Last time, on Total Drama Twist, our contestant's first challenge was a free-for-all fight to the death with their powerful Swords de Plastica. Only two of the campers survived the battle. There was Dawn, our nature girl, and Mike. Or is he Bob? Everyone else got hit pretty hard- - -literally. Owen is devastated with himself for killing Mr. Coconut in combat, and Izzy went a little over the top, attacking everyone in sight like a total lunatic! In the end, her craziness was her downfall as she was eliminated and taken to an underground version of Playa des Losers. What will be the next crazy challenge for these pathetic teens? Will Owen ever get over his terrible cold-blooded murder of Mr. Coconut? And- - -"

"'Murder'?" scoffed Noah. "Mr. Coconut is a fruit. He has no feelings. He can't die. And Owen tapped him three times with a plastic sword." He turned to Owen, who was standing next to him, crying. "Come on dude! Get over it all ready! Please!"

Owen sniffled. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"

"Ahem," interrupted Chris. "And will Noah ever learn to shut his mouth? Find out right now on TOTAL, DRAMA, TWIST!"


The theme song played. It showed the camera sweeping past the dock, where Chris waved at it. Chef smiled at it, then gulped as it came nearer to him and smacked him in the face. After he disappeared the camera zoomed up the cliff, where it showed a squirrel punching Zeke in the face. As the camera "fell" off the cliff so did Zeke. Hitting the water, bubbles covered the screen. When they cleared, Izzy was swimming away from a shark, only to turn around and bite the shark back. Above the water, Noah was sitting in a boat, reading his trademark book, when Zeke landed on him.

Right after the moment of impact, the camera zoomed to the forest, where Mike was petting a raccoon. The raccoon bit his finger, causing him to wince in pain, inhale deeply, then scream at the wild creature. The camera zoomed to the waterfall, where Annette was singing on top of a log that went over the waterfall. At the bottom, Dawn was sitting cross-legged on a beam of wood going across the pool of water at the bottom of the waterfall, meditating. Suddenly, Annette flew past her and her mouth fell open. The camera moved to the outhouse confessional, where a bear was knocking on the door. Blake stuck his head out, screamed, and then ducked back in.

Chef's kitchen was shown next, with a small television in the background upon which Courtney and Cody could be seen. Lightning was dumping protein powder into his mouth before fist-pumping, while Heather was tied to a chair, being force-fed Chef Hatchet's special soup by Chef himself. The camera moved outside to the campfire pit, where Owen was holding Mr. Coconut and rocking back and forth giggling. Staci was seen on the dock, blabbing on while reading from a gigantic stack of papers. The camera shifted a little, showing Chris on the other side of the dock, covering his ears and yelling. He ran around and fell into the water. When he surfaced, in classic cartoon style, his head steamed over in anger, causing a fire.

The camera followed the fire embers up, and then back down, revealing the campfire. Zoey was sitting in front of it, looking nervous, before her eyebrows scrunched up and she grinned evilly, only to look around self-consciously when she saw Zeke and Mike sitting on either side of her. The camera panned out to show all thirteen contestants sitting on wooden logs around the campfire, as Chris stood nearby and grinned at the camera. A wooden sign was shown, where neon letters lit up, saying TOTAL DRAMA TWIST.


The contestants sat scattered around the tables in the dining hall, enjoying breakfast. That is, if your definition of 'enjoying' is despising. Some of them were excited enough, however, to ignore the terrible food. "I can scarcely believe this, eh!" exclaimed Zeke. "I actually made it to the second day of the show without being kicked off!"

"Yeah, but that's only because Izzy was going insane," scoffed Heather. "Erm. More insane than usual."

"Well Lightning's sha-relieved!" added the jock. "No more crazy people chasing the Lightning around!"

Mike was sitting at a table by himself when he heard Lightning's comment, and his heart sunk. "No more crazy people," he said to himself. "Hopefully. I just need to avoid getting hurt at all costs. I can't afford to let Bob do anything crazy again!"

Static

Mike: Well, I might as well admit it. Bob shows up whenever I injure myself. So if I get hurt, I'm doomed. To put it simply. Sigh.

Static

End of Confessionals

Heather rolled her eyes at Lightning, before turning back to Zeke with a witchy smile. "Anyway, Freak-Zeke, you'll be the next to go, mark my words."

Static

Ezekiel: Heather is not a nice person, eh.

Static

Heather: Zeke really pisses me off. He lost a million bucks, I won it. Seems fair enough, but he just had to steal it and burn it to ashes in a volcano!

Static

End of Confessionals

Blake sat down next to Noah, holding a tray of strange goo. "Is this edible?" he asked cautiously.

"No. They just give us this weird sludge to look at," answered the bookworm.

"Then what are we supposed to eat?!" cried Blake, distraught.

Noah rolled his eyes. "Eat the food, Sir Oblivious."

Blake inhaled sharply. "You lied to me! I'm not allowed to lie."

Owen, who was sitting next to the egghead, sniffled a little. "Noah was being sarcastic, Blake." The fat boy sniffled again. "He does that a lot."

Noah smiled slightly. "Do I? I'm sorry, I didn't know."

Staci sat down next to them and jumped right into the conversation. "Yah, my great-great-grandpa Beemo invented lies. Before that, people always had to tell the truth."

"That doesn't seem like a very good invention," said Blake.

Staci was flabbergasted, and tried to think of a comeback for a long while before coming up with another lie. "Well, you see, my great- - -"

"That's nice, Staci," interrupted Dawn as politely as possible. The nature girl had also joined the three guys at the table. She examined the goo carefully. "There better not be any meat in this. I know humans are omnivorous by nature, but I just can't bring myself to eat my friends."

Chef leaned out the door leading into his kitchen, having overheard the moon child. "Hah, don't be silly, creepy girl. It's all artificially created latex-rubber-tapioca-blend mold-injected junk made to look like mystery meat. Plus a little parsley for that extra little bit o' flavor everyone loves. See how it looks like mystery meat?"

"This is supposed to look like mystery meat?" asked Heather, disgusted. "It looks more like dog crap."

"Yeah, the Lightning hates this food. It needs more protein!"

Ezekiel took a bite and passed out. Annette looked at him and started singing. "Oh, this food is really gross! It kind of tastes like toes! Why does Chef make this stuff? Why does Chris treat us so rough?"

"Will you stop singing, Miss Off-Key?" asked Heather commandingly.

Annette grinned annoyingly. "Sure! I'll stop! I want a lollipop!"

Static

Annette: Has anyone ever noticed Heather isn't that nice of a person? Ya know, I bet no one's ever noticed that before!

Static

End of Confessionals

Mike glanced around at his table, where he sat alone. He sighed happily. "Here, I'm safe from any harm. Now if I could just figure out a way to get rid of Bob..."

"Hi Mike!" beamed Zoey, sitting down next to him, holding her own tray of disgusting goo.

Mike smiled faintly. "Hi Z- - -AAAGH!"

"What?" asked the MPD's girlfriend, alarmed.

"Put down the tray!" he exclaimed. "It has plastic utensils on it! One of them could accidentally fall off and hit me!"

Zoey gave him a weird look. "Um, okay."

Mike gulped. "Listen Zoey, just the slightest bit of pain will trigger Bob."

The indie chick finally understood. "All righty then. Seen him. Don't like him. I'll put down the tray." She set it on the floor, just as Chris' voice came over the megaphone.

"Okay campers! It's another be-a-utiful day on our little piece of paradise. The sun is out, the birds are singing, and the imaginary talking squirrels are chittering in glee at all of your misfortunes. Too bad we won't be spending much time outside today!"

"Darn," said Dawn, which was essentially the most profane she ever got. The twelve campers dumped their unfinished goo in the trash and walked out of the mess hall, where Chris stood in front of them with his annoying smile.

The host smirked. "Now, before I reveal too much, let's put together this season's teams!" A collective cheer went up from most of the campers.

Owen sobbed. "I really hope I'm not on Mr. Coconut's team. Then his ghost won't be able to torment me."

"His ghost?" asked Annette, slightly spooked.

"Mr. Coconut died. I...I killed him, remember?" reminded Owen, before sniffling a little. He held up Mr. Coconut. "This, is his ghost. Horrible...dreadful...sniff. ROTTEN BANANA BREAD! I'M SO SORRY MR. COCONUT!"

Noah rolled his eyes. "Gee, I'm so sympathetic."

Static

Noah: His ghost? Again, Mr. Coconut is a fruit. Look, I feel sorry for Owen, but there's no excusing the fact that he's become unnaturally attached to an inamite object with a smiley face.

Static

Heather: What the heck is wrong with Owen?

Static

Annette: Oh the coconut is dead! Even if he didn't lose his head! He now has a ghost! That always eats burned French toast!

Static

Owen: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

Static

Lightning: Sha-bam! It's time for the teams! Go Team Lightning! Woohoo!

Static

Sierra: Eek, the island! I snuck onto it when no one was looking!

(Chris peeks in the window)

Chris: Wait, wha, what are you doing here?!

Sierra: Um, goodbye.

(She sees a hole in the wall and jumps out)

Sierra: [sticking her head back in, speaking mysteriously] You didn't see anything.

Static

End of Confessionals

Outside the dining hall, Chris got annoyed with all the chattering. "Everyone shut up now. Let's start the teams with...Blake."

Blake shrugged. "Okay."

Chris continued without missing a beat. "Suit Man is followed by Dawn, and Ezekiel, the homeschooled brainless kid! These three are all now members of the as-of-yet-unnamed Team One!"

"Yeah, Team One, eh!" shouted Zeke, picking his nose.

Dawn looked at him, grimacing. "That's kind of...gross."

"Now Annette," announced the host, "you're on Team Two!"

"La la la! I'm on team Two! It's gonna be fun for me and you!" sang the blonde girl.

"Not if I'm on your team," quipped Heather.

Chris grinned, an evil idea coming to mind. "Thanks for volunteering to join Annette, Heather!"

The queen bee glared at the handsome host furiously. "Sometimes I really hate you."

"I know. Trust me, I know."

Annette, meanwhile, seemed not to mind her new teammate. "Hello fellow team member!"

Heather made a fist and gestured at her menacingly. "If you sing even one syllable, I will personally make sure you never sing again."

Annette gulped, before returning to her normal goofy demeanor. "Okey dokey! I got it right! I'll make sure my singing is outta sight!" Heather clenched her fists but said nothing.

Static

Annette: SYLLABLE! Ha! Take that, Heather!

Static

End of Confessionals

"Then, we have Owen and Mr. Coconut. Or is it Mr. Coconut's ghost? Whatever. You're on Team One, guys."

"Nooo!" cried Owen. "Mr. Coconut...I'm sorry. I don't deserve to be on the same team as your spirit! WAAAAAAAHHHHH!"

Chris winced and covered his ears. "Geez, quit whining already! Ignoring the idiot crying over a coconut, we have two members for Team Two! Mike...and Lightning!"

"Yeah, sha-Team Two! We're gonna kick butt this season, Lightning-style!"

"Staci! Go and annoy Team Two!" commanded Chris.

Staci waddled over to Chris. "Yah, my great-aunt Melinda invented teams, and before that- - -"

Chris frowned. "I said annoy Team Two, not me."

Staci waddled over to stand next to Heather, who glared at Chris before sarcastically commenting "Thanks a lot."

Chris smiled sadistically. "You're very much welcome, Heather. Oh look! Two campers left. Noah and Zoey."

Noah gulped, feigning nervousness. "Whatever you do, please don't put me on Team Two."

Chris knew what the sarcastic genius was up to, so he decided to play along. "Okay Noah! Ha ha, I'll humor you. You can go and be the last member of Team One."

Noah fist-pumped! "Yes, take that, stupid! Team Two is the team I wanted to be on- - -Wait. What? No! That's not what I- - -AAARGH! So much for reverse psychology."

"My parents say reverse psychology is bad," said Blake.

"Of course they do." Noah rolled his eyes.

Static

Blake: I don't know. I'm getting this weird feeling Noah doesn't like me. Is that normal, or am I just not used to extreme sarcasm?

Static

End of Confessionals

"So that leaves..." began Chris.

Zoey finished for him. "I'm on Team Two!" She ran over and hugged Mike, who smiled. All of the campers started talking with their teammates until Chris cleared his throat.

"All right, enough chatting!"

Staci ignored the host. "Yah, my step-uncle three times removed invented chatting- - -"

"I said enough!" yelled Chris. "Team names are the Psycho Psychos and the Crazy Crazies. You guys choose."

"Can we be the Regretful Coconut Killers?" asked Owen.

"Heck no!" answered Annette.

Noah glared at her. "Hey, get out of here! You're not even on our team!"

"Fine," said the short girl. "Bye-Bye! Tata for now and all that!"

Ezekiel stopped picking his nose for long enough to ask a question. "Could our team be the Wild Wilds, eh? 'Cause I'm born to be wild!"

Dawn gave him a pitying look. "You are born to be a freak of nature. And although I like most of them, I don't like you. We'll take the Psycho Psychos."

Owen sobbed loudly. "Agreed." He continued sobbing.

Blake wasn't exactly content with the team name. "I'm not exactly allowed to be a psycho. You see, I have this condition whenever I'm on sugar rush- - -"

"No one cares," deadpanned Chris. He turned to Team Two. "Since they're the Psycho Psychos, you guys are..."

"The sha-Crazy Crazies!" finished Lightning. "Yeah!"

"Crazy Crazies! We're not lazies! I like to pick daisies!"

Zoey smiled blissfully. "I dunno, I'm not really that crazy. Neither is Mike."

"Yeah," chirped her boyfriend. "Most of the time."

Out of nowhere, Chris shoved his loudspeaker in Noah's face. "SHUT UP!"

Noah, a little startled, began "But I wasn't talki- - -never mind."

"Okay," said Chris. "Today's challenge is really fun. If you like board games, that is."

"Ooh! Ooh! I do!" exclaimed Blake, practically jumping up and down in excitement.

Lightning didn't share his opposing team member's enthusiasm. "Uh, Lightning don'tlike being bored. Lightning likes action! Like this! Sha-boom!" The athlete did a karate kick and hit Noah by accident, sending him flying. The egghead, screaming, crashed into the top of a tree, and bounced down the branches to land on the ground.

Standing up and dusting himself off, Noah gave Lightning the evil eye, and the middle finger. "Nice accuracy, sha-idiot."

Static

Noah: That was painful.

Static

(Zeke is shown sleeping in the confessional. Suddenly, a screeching, chirping noise comes from outside and he wakes up)

Ezekiel: Who's there?

(Out of nowhere, a squirrel drops down on top of him and starts scratching his face until he falls over)

Ezekiel: AAAAAAHHH! Quit it, eh!

Static

End of Confessionals

Annette decided to annoy everyone by singing. "Oh this game will be boring! And soon we'll all be snoring!"

Chris shook his head. "Boring? No such thing on Total Drama. For those of you bored already, be bored no longer. Because this is the Not-So-Bored-Game! Chef, if you please..."

The cook pulled a lever on the megaphone pole and the ground outside the dining hall tilted downward, causing all twelve campers to roll onto a huge underground game board, which was covered with a plethora of different objects and flashing lights.

Mike had been standing near the front of the ground that tilted, so he fell straight down, with Owen cushioning his landing. The MPD teen sighed, relieved. "Oh phew. I didn't bump my head or anything! Owen, you saved me!"

Owen looked at him sorrowfully. "I just wish I could've saved Mr. Coconut! WAAAAAAAAH!"

Ezekiel stood up and started to explore the game board. "This place is cool, eh! It's like that game mononononononononononopoly."

Noah rolled his eyes. "What's with all the 'no's?"

Ezekiel shrugged. "If ya insist then, no 'no's, eh. Moyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyespoly."

Chris walked down to the game board with Chef at his side. "Okay, everyone get up. It's rule time! I'd like to introduce you all to Monotrapdungeonsorrychessopoly! It's my patent-pending human-sized board-game slash RPG slash obstacle course slash smoothie bar."

"Smoothie bar?" asked Staci.

Chris ignored her. "It is yet another wonderful McLean-brand product!"

Heather giggled condescendingly. "Wow. You've had a lot of really crappy ideas, Chris, but this one really takes the cake."

Chris flashed the queen bee a smile. "People will buy anything with a fancy infomercial and a catchy name. Now, the rules of Monotrapdungeonsorrychessopoly are pretty simple. The goal is to get one of your team members across the finish line before the other team does. Each team gets an oversized die, takes turns rolling the die and choosing a member to move. Any member can move. You could even have one teammate go several times in a row, if you wanted."

Blake looked around, slightly awed. "How does this place fit in with role play games and Monopoly and chess? You just go in a square."

"Well, that's where the cruel twist comes into this challenge," answered the host before laughing evilly. "As you can see, the board is covered with assorted objects of varying uses, like the treadmills, that chicken suit, and those giant rubber bands. Almost every tile has something on it. Some have traps, some are challenges, and some lead into Team vs. Team challenges, all of which are the cruel twists! Some squares are also humiliating or painful, such as getting slammed by Mr. Owwy!"

"Who's Mr. Owwy?" asked Mike nervously.

"This guy!" exclaimed Chris, gesturing at a doorway. Chef walked through, wearing a hockey mask and holding a baseball bat. He swung the bat menacingly.

Noah shook his head sadly, laughing inside at Chris' stupidity before piping up. "Question. If you plan on selling this game to the public, and Chef is Mr. Owwy, how can you have the game work if there's only one Chef?"

Chris pointed at Noah and giggled. "Cartoon logic! Moving on with the rules. The challenges are mostly cruel and humiliating, but there are a rare few that are nice. And by few I mean one. There's one square that gives you a free smoothie. But it's strategically placed so there's a 374,829,678,120,456,293,239,387,103,908 to 1 chance anyone will land on it. If, by a stroke of inconceivable luck, you actually land on it, you get a nice surprise. And I mean actually nice. Okay, everyone separate into teams and meet on the green and red starting squares."

Everyone glanced around to see two large squares, a red one and a green one. The Psychos took the green, the Crazies the red. "Look out!" yelled Chris. "Here come your dice!"

'Mr. Owwy' threw the red and green dice to the Psychos and Crazies, respectively. Mike caught the die for his team. "Whoa, this thing is huge! And heavy. Oh man, I think I'm going to drop- - -" He dropped it. It landed on his foot, making a 'boink' sound. "Ow!' He breathed in deeply. "Calm down. It doesn't hurt that much- - -"

Suddenly, he inhaled sharply and lost it. "AAAAH! YOUR WALKIE-TALKIE BELONGS TO MY TOAD!" Mike inhaled sharply again and struggled to resume control. "Errrgh! No Bob! Ugh. Whew!" He wiped the sweat from his brow. "That was close."

Static

Mike: Crisis averted. Thank goodness.

Static

End of Confessionals

Zoey laid her hands on his shoulders comfortingly. "Are you going to be alright, Mike?" He nodded.

Chris shook his head sadly at them, before turning to face everyone. "LET THE GAMES BEGIN!"

Zeke moved to roll the die, but Noah stopped him. "Let's think about this first. There must be some type of strategy involved here- - -"

"Think again!" interrupted Chris. "It's one hundred percent luck!"

"We should really start moving," said Dawn.

Noah turned to Owen. "Hey buddy, rolling the die might cheer you up, huh?"

Owen ignored and him and continued sobbing away.

"Uh, I'll do it," volunteered Blake. "I think I'm allowed to roll giant dice." He picked up the die, his knees quaking, and dropped it. It landed on a four. "That's not a bad roll," observed the suit-wearing teen happily.

"But it's not great either," said Noah pessimistically. "Who's gonna go the four spaces?"

Almost everyone simultaneously said 'Zeke'. The only three not to say it were the Zekester himself, Owen (who was crying in a heap on the floor), and Mr. Coconut (who doesn't talk all that often).

Zeke gulped. "What? Me? No way. You won't catch Zeke playing board games that easy, eh."

Noah rolled his eyes. "Zeke! There's chocolate milk four spaces ahead!"

"No way, eh!" exclaimed the Canadian. "Outta mah way!" He zipped ahead four spaces and something clicked.

Chris laughed. "Zekiel has landed on a 'cruel' tile! Too bad for him. Heh heh heh."

Zeke paid the host no attention, instead looking around for the drink he'd been promised. "Man! Where's that chockate milk, eh?" Mr. Owwy appeared behind him, looming over the homeschooler threateningly. He raised his bat, swung hard, then backed away into the shadows, cackling maniacally. "OUWWCH!"

Chris wiped a tear of laughter from his eye as Zeke sat on the tile, little cartoon birds flying around his head. "Haha, poor sucker."

Static

Ezekiel: Is there chockate milk in here?

Static

Chef: That was more fun than the time I threw my dad out of a sixth-story window.

Static

End of Confessionals

Over with the Psychos, Annette struggled to pick up the die, then dropped it, scoring a two. "Sweet! I get to go two spaces!"

"What a cheap roll," said Heather. "Go six instead, and make it snappy.""

But that's cheating!" protested the terrible singer.

"Move it Miss Annoying!" commanded Heather. "Do you want to win or not?"

Annette stood still, arms crossed. "Heather is a cheater! I hope Mr. Owwy beats her!"

"Zip it, Sing-Song!" hissed the queen bee.

Mike spoke up. "I agree with Annette. Cheating isn't fair, and Chris'll punish us for sure."

Heather glared at him. "Then you don't have to cheat and you can come in last."

"Sha-Cheating!" shouted Lightning for no real reason as Mike sighed. Annette decided to listen to the evil chick's advice and walked six spaces. When she stopped, a siren started. At first everyone feared her cheating had been noticed, but Chris very quickly proved them wrong, to everyone on the Psycho's relief.

"Hey! Annette landed on a Team Versus Team tile!" called the host. "Everyone head to the treadmills in the center of the board!"

"What about our placement?" asked Blake. "How will we remember where we were on the board?""

"Trust me. It won't matter in five minutes," answered Chris, before chuckling evilly.

After a few minutes, everyone was gathered in front of the treadmills. "Okay, now what?" asked Noah.

"Now it's time for a mini-challenge," replied Chris, rubbing his hands together gleefully.

"We got that part. I mean, what's the challenge? Or are you just making this up as you go?"

Chris laughed at the last part. "No, Noah. I'm much better organized than that. Reality show hosting does require organization, as does cruelty. Heh heh."

"Chris, you, organized?" said the sarcastic genius bemused. "That will never happen."

"Hey!" objected the handsome host. "I worked hard on this game."

"No you didn't!" yelled all twelve campers (including Mr. Coconut) and Chef at the same time.

Chris shied away a little. "C'mon guys, cut me some slack here. Hosting is hard. I'd like to see you all try."

"Actually, I'd love to host," said Dawn. "May I?"

"Me too! Hand over the crown Chris. You've had four seasons already," whined Heather.

"Four and one thirteenth seasons, to be precise," added Noah.

"Enough already!" cried Chris, exasperated. "No one is hosting except for me. On with the challenge. As you can see, here there are two treadmills." He gestured behind him. "Each team will choose a member to run."

"I'm not allowed to run," began Blake. "Running makes you sweat, and sweat makes you smell bad, and I'm not allowed to smell bad. It could give the wrong impression about me. 'Cause- - -"

"Okay, that's enough of that," interrupted Chris. "Blake, since you interrupted me in typical stupid teenager fashion, you can run for the Psycho Psychos."

"But I just- - -" protested Blake, stopping as Dawn laid a hand on his shoulder sympathetically.

"It's best not to argue with him, Blake," advised the moonchild.

Owen sobbed, prompting Noah to try and reassure him. "Come on, Owen. Really. It's been over forty-eight hours. Don't you think it's time to move on?"

Owen sniffled. "Well...maybe. I, sniff, just feel so awful..."

"Yeah, yeah. We know," said Chris dismissively. "Moving on. Crazies, who will run for your pathetic team?"

"I vote Lightning," said Heather. "He's probably the strongest here. Psychically, that is. Mentally, he's the dumbest piece of crap I've met in a long time. Thankfully, intelligence doesn't matter here. And then again, anyone could beat Blake."

"Yah, my aunt Clarice invented beating," added Staci, much to Heather's annoyance. "Before that, nobody ever got beaten up."

Lightning shouted 'Sha-Lightning' enthusiastically, fist-pumping and accidentally knocking Staci out. "Yes! Lightning's gonna beat the weakling and score one for his sha-awesome team!"

"How sha-cool," added Noah sarcastically. The jock paid him no attention, hopping onto the treadmill and pressing random buttons.

"How does this crazy running thingy work?" he asked. "Lightning don't like things with lots o' buttons."

"Hey!" exclaimed Chris. "I haven't explained the rest of the- - -" Before he could finish, Lightning pressed the 'on' button and was propelled backwards by the speed of the treadmill. He'd accidentally set it to fifty miles per hour while pressing random buttons, and the athlete was about to pay the price.

"Sha-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

" - - -challenge," finished Chris as Lightning flew through the air and slammed against the cement wall with a vomit-inducing crunch. There was now a Lighting-shaped impression.

"Oh...Lightning don't feel too good."

"Too well," corrected Annette. "It's too well. Stress your grammar, Lightning."

"The pain! Sha-owie!"

Static

Lightning: [dizzy and confused] Sha-bam! Take that Rake! Or is it Cake? Lightning don't care, he won! Yaaaaahhhhh!

(Lightning faints and falls over)

Static

End of Confessionals

"Well, looks like Lightning's outta the game for now," observed Chris happily as the jock collapsed on the ground, unconscious. "Who's takin' his place?"

Zoey wrapped her arm around her boyfriend's shoulder. "Mike! You should!"

"Uhm," began Mike, "I don't know..."

"You should," said Heather. "Meaning you will, or you'll face my wrath." She glared menacingly and held up her fist.

"Okay, okay," said Mike, shivering.

Blake gave him a confused look. "Let's start already." The two stepped up to the treadmills.

"This challenge is pretty simple. Both runners keep on truckin' on the treadmills till this alarm goes off. At that point, if both are still going strong, the treadmills are turned up a notch. You lose by falling off, or rather, getting thrown off, as Lightning so nicely demonstrated for us. The winner gets to use the bunker when it's Dynamite Time."

"Dynamite time? I'm not allowed- - -"

"I know what you're going to say, Blake, and I don't care. You don't know what Dynamite Time is yet, but trust me, it'll all make sense soon enough. Time starts now!"

The treadmills powered up and the two started running. Within seconds, Blake started to hyperventilate.

"Oh man! What, huff, are, huff, my parents, pant, going to say, pant, about this? Huff huff."

"Don't know," said Chris. "Don't care."

"Blake, just calm down," advised Mike in between pants. "Forget your parents! This is Total Drama, not a PTA meeting!" He exhaled heavily.

"Stop helping the opposition!" yelled Heather. Mike looked at her and shrugged as an alarm went off.

Chris checked his watch. "Oh! Guess what? Time to kick it up a notch!" He pressed a button on a remote he pulled out of nowhere. The treadmills began to whir faster, causing Blake and Mike to run faster as well. The two were really starting to get tired.

Noah tapped Owen's shoulder. "Hey, Owen. You should really see this. It's hilarious!" With a zap, a little bit of static electricity jumped from one friend to the other.

"Waaaahahaaaaah," whined the fat boy, ignoring his pal until he noticed something. "Uhh...hmm? Oh my gosh! Mr. Coconut! I, I think he's breathing!"

"Uh?" Noah gave him a weird look.

"Noah! You saved Mr. Coconut's life! That bolt of static electricity revived him!" He jumped high into the sky and hugged Mr. Coconut. "Oh Mr. Coconut, I'll never ever kill you again!"

Noah rolled his eyes but was secretly relieved. "Good. At least you're back to normal." Meanwhile, Mike and Blake were starting to get exhausted.

"I...don't...think...I...can...go...much...longer!" Mike got out into between gulps of air.

Blake was breathing heavily. "Huh. Me neith- - -AAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" He faltered for just a moment and the treadmill sent him flying backwards, hitting the wall and creating a Blake-shaped impression over the Lightning-shaped impression from earlier. "Ow!"

Mike kept running, still looking behind him in awe. "I, I won! Wow! I actually- - -oops." Mike, too, stopped for a split second and was thrown off. He flew into the wall a few feet from Blake. He started breathing heavily, then inhaled sharply. "No! Bob! Stay in my head! Stop it! AAAAGH!"

"Who's Bob, eh?" asked Zeke. "Is he that crazy sqiurrelly who attacked me?"

"THE PANCAKES ARE COMING FOR OUR CAT FOOD!" yelled Bob.

"I don't have a cat, eh. They make me sneeze. Or is that avocado?

Zoey ran over to her boyfriend. "Mike! Are you okay? You got, like, launched!"

The psycho paid her no attention. "AHAHAAHHHHAAAA! TOOTHPASTE TASTES LIKE TREE BARK!" Then he glanced at her and tackled the redhead, biting her arm and growling.

"Ow! Mike! Bob! Whoever you are! GET...OFF!" She growled in anger and kicked Bob off. The psycho flew back into the wall with a dog-like whine. "Argh...Oh! Mike! I'm sorry!"

Bob had gone back to ignoring her. "AARRRGGHHHHH! TIME FOR TO EAT PHONES!" He started running all over the place while screaming and jumping around.

"Great," commented Noah sarcastically. "Mike's insane."

Chris grinned, bemused. "Well, it looks like the Crazies have won this challenge, but only by a slim margin." He gestured at the Crazy Crazies team. "You guys, go through that trapdoor."

"Yah, my great-great-uncle Victor invented trapdoors. Before that, people didn't have trapdoors." Staci smiled and Noah face-palmed.

"Yadda yadda yadda," said Chris "Into the trapdoor, winners of the Team Vs. Team!" With some difficulty, the Crazies all filed in. Chris followed them in as Bob attacked his hair. The host threw the psycho back out the door. "Okay, Psychos. Have fun with Dynamite Time! It's the fun twist to this challenge!" He slammed the door to the bunker shut.

"DYNAMITE DYNANANAMITEITEITE!" yelled Bob as her crawled around on all fours, panting like a dog.

Chris glared at him through a window in the bunker. "I don't care if you won. Get exploded with the rest of them!"

Zeke tapped his chin thoughtfully. "What's dynamite time, eh?" As he finished his sentence, something clicked and everything exploded. When the smoke cleaed, the Psychos were still standing, but covered with soot, wide-eyed, and looking thoroughly surprised.

Chris popped out of the door. "So, Psychos and Bob. How'd you guys like Dynamite Time?"

Noah coughed out smoke. "It was awesome. Truly wonderful. You should do it more often. Really."

"Thanks!" beamed the host. "And I hope you really did enjoy Dynamite Time, 'cause it happens every ten minutes! After every Team Versus Team challenge, one team will get the bunker privilege. The other team...well, the other team gets exploded. On with the game! Mr. Owwy, if you please..." Chef, still in his stupid disguise, came out of nowhere and smacked Annette and Zeke back to random spaces on the board.

"I'll roll this time," volunteered Owen. "Now that Mr. Coconut is all better, I can do anything!" He tossed the die high up into the air and it landed with a one face-up.

"What a shame," said Dawn. "Owen's aura showed great potential for that roll, but nothing came of it. I guess I'll go." She stepped forward a square and braced herself for a sudden shock. Nothing happened. "Oh...no Mr. Owwy. Thank heavens."

"Not too fast, Dawn," giggled Chris. "That's a humiliating square. Crazies, come over to the middle of the board. Except Bob."

Bob was entertaining himself by scratching the paint off the walls. "HAHAHAA! GREEN IS A FRIENDLY COLOR! HE LETS ME PLAY WITH HIS PET PIRANHA!"

"I'll bet he does," said the host. "Now, Crazies, here's your chance to settle any grudges you may have against Dawn...because you get to pelt her with fish!"

"Sha-disgusting!"

"I'm pretty sure no one here has too much of a grudge against Dawn," admitted Heather. "But hey, I get to cause pain and humiliation!" She sinisterly picked up a fish and readied it to throw.

"I thought you were considerably less evil now," said Noah.

"You thought wrong. Being an anti-hero got old quickly."

Dawn hadn't overheard any of what Chris had said regarding her 'humiliating tile', so she stood looking bored and a little anxious. Suddenly, a fish slammed into the back of her head. She turned around in disbelief and got pelted with a whole pile of the slimy things.

Zoey winced. "I'm sorry, Dawn! But it's the game's rules, y'know..."

"I like it, yo!" exclaimed Zeke. "It's like, awesome! I get to hit people with fish!"

"She's on our team, idiot!" yelled Noah, grabbing Ezekiel and dragging him back while the toque-wearing teen kept trying to throw fish.

"Yeah! The Lightning loves throwing fish at people!" Lightning enjoyed it so much, in fact, that he decided to throw one at Heather. The two got into a fish fight, but Lightning ducked and a fish sailed straight into Bob's face. He started throwing fish at everyone and soon the entire room was engulfed in chaos.

"Alright, alright!" yelled Chris, crouching and covering his head with his hands to avoid the fish. "Enough! As much as I like seeing people get bombarded with aquatic vertebrate, it's nearly time to start another Team Versus Team challenge. You guys roll a few more times first."

Noah obliged and got a three. After moving his required amount of spaces, he grinned at Chris sarcastically. "Gee, what horrible challenge will I have to endure now?" Chris shrugged.

An alarm went off and scared everyone.

"What was that?!" shrieked Heather, jumping into Lightning's arms. He gave her a weird look and dropped her.

"Oh-ho, yeah," laughed the host. "I forgot that part. When the next Dynamite Time is coming up soon, you get that nifty little warning alarm. So get moving!"

"Yes sir, eh!" saluted Zeke.

"Yah!" shouted Staci. As Bob continued to destroy stuff and chase Chef around in the background, the chatterbox rolled the die and got a three. Zoey was the one to move.

The indie chick looked around cautiously. "What happens now? Nothing dangerous and or humiliating happened to me, so am I on a free space?"

Chris shook his head. "Haha! 'Free space'? Zoey, you crack me up. There aren't any free spaces in Monotrapdungeonsorrychessopoly! Time for a Team Versus Team challenge!" Everyone groaned. "This time, you'll be playing X-TREME Dodgeball."

The teams gathered in the center of the board. There were strange toy-gun-like objects on the floor, except much bigger and more dangerous looking.

"Okay, seeing that we only have..." (he checked his watch) "...two minutes till this place goes kablooey, I'll make this short. Grab a ball gun. Shoot the other team with the dodgeballs. If you get shot, you're out. Last one standing wins for the team. GO GO GO!" Not pausing to watch the challenge, he ran to the trapdoor and dove in. "I'm just going to wait over here in the safety of the bunker. See you in one and a half minutes!"

Ezekiel picked up his gun and experimented with it. "Yahoo! This is fun, eh!" He shot Noah.

From his position of safety, Chris snorted. "Noah's out! Ha-ha."

Noah sarcastically feigned happiness. "I'm on your team, Zeke! Great job! Shooting your teammates was the goal of the game! You did everything right, 'eh'."

"Thanks, Noah," grinned Zeke obliviously. "I really am good, aren't I?" Meanwhile, Annette was around with the gun, accidentally firing it. The ball hit Zeke in the head and knocked him out, and the bad singer smiled.

Owen dropped his gun as the firing really started up. "Mr. Coconut, I'll protect you!" A ball comes whizzing towards the fat boy and his beloved coconut, but he shielded the fruit with his body and got hit in the back "No! Well, at least I protected Mr. Coconut."

Bob jumped in the middle of the fight, somehow managing to avoid all the dodgeballs flying around. "MY NOSE HAIRS ARE PLANNING TO KILL US ALL!"

"Ew!" yelled Blake.

Bob pointed at him and laughed before picking up a gun. "TIME FOR CLAP!" He fired the toy randomly, hitting himself with a ball in the process, before throwing it away and chasing poor Chef. After catching up to 'Mr. Owwy', Bob took the bat out of his hands and jumped on top of the bunker. There, he started smashing everything within reach, much to Chris' chagrin.

Annette started singing, as per usual. "This game is insane! Does Chris have a brain? Probably not! I hope I don't get shot!" Eventually, Blake, Annette, Lightning, Dawn, Staci, Mr. Coconut, and Zoey all got hit by each other. Heather was the last one standing.

"Yes! Finally I win!" shouted the queen bee gleefully.

"Of course," sighed Noah.

Static

Noah: Why? WHY?! Isn't getting blown up once enough?

Static

End of Confessionals

"Crazies! Into the bunker!" commanded Chris. "Except Bob if possible!" The Crazies, including Bob, obliged.

"TIME FOR GO KABLOOEY TO TEH PEOPLES!" yelled Bob as he jumped into the relative safety through the trapdoor. Another explosion rattled the board, temporarily making the screen go black.

"Uhhhhhhh," moaned Blake. "I'm pretty sure I'm not allowed to get exploded." The sheltered kid collapsed.

Chris snickered at him. "Okay! Back to the game!"

A montage played. Heather rolled a die, Zeke dropped one on his foot. Mr. Owwy smacked Noah on the head. Staci looked up just as a rock landed on her. Zeke is shown wearing a top hat and suit while carrying a wooden cane, dancing to a ragtime. Heather stepped forward two squares, looked around, then quickly leapt forward three more.

Blake walked forward, and carefully stepped onto a square. When nothing happened, he relaxed and smiled. Then the square piece sprung up and sent him flying. Annette jumped to land on a square, but it opened up before she landed and the poor girl fell down a pit. Bob ran around and hit thing with the bat, then spotted Chef and started beating the crap out of him. Dawn was catapulted from giant rubber bands like a sling shot, showing no sign of fear at all. Lightning was shown in several continuous clips getting hit in the head with different objects; an anvil, a cinder block, a hammer, and a bowl of spaghetti.

Heather walks forward, looked worriedly at the square she was on, then stepped aside, avoiding an explosion, while grinning deviously. Zeke got dumped into a giant bucket of water. Zoey rolled the die. Blake struggled to lift it, and Owen took it from him and rolled. The Crazies went into the bunker. The next clip showed the Psychos in the bunker. Chris ducked his head in the bunker. The next clips showed explosion after explosion until the montage ended and the show went back to the normal game play.

Owen fist-pumped. "Yes! I rolled a six! Awesome!"

"Well, I'll step forward if you want," said Blake. He walked really, really, really slowly, before turning to Chris. "Are we done yet? I'm getting really tired. And I'm not allowed to get tired. Being tired means that- - -"

Chris sighed. "Yes. We're almost done."

"We're almost done! Here comes the sun!"

"Thank heavens," said Dawn.

Lightning rolled the die. "Sha-awesome! Lightning's going six spaces!"

"No, Heather's going six spaces."

Chris watched her walk across the board, a slight smile on his lips. "Yes! I mean...oh, too bad. Heather, that's a humiliating space. Now you gotta wear this fashionable chicken suit!"

Heather paled. "No. No! I refuse!"

"Then Mr. Owwy will persuade you." Chef grinned, happy to be of assistance, before realizing that Bob was chewing on his baseball bat. Heather grumbled and put on the chicken suit.

Bob stared at her, fascinated. "UHHHHH! SAY GOODBYE TO CHICKENS!" He ran at her, and the queen bee took off screaming.

Static

Heather: Stupid Mike. [looking at the chicken suit] Well, I've already cheated a lot today, why not one more time?

(She tears off the chicken suit and drops it down the toilet)

Heather: Bye-bye. Ha.

Static

End of Confessionals

Over by the Psychos, Blake was still walking extremely slowly towards his tile. "Blake!" exclaimed Dawn, exasperated. "We can't move until you reach the square!"

"Okay, already. I'm hurrying up." The sheltered teen in a suit fast-walked the remaining three squares to a red and purple tile.

Chris gasped and rubbed his eyes as if to clear any hallucinations away. "I don't believe it! I just don't believe it! No way!"

"What?"

Chris couldn't find the words to speak, at first. Eventually, he choked out "You landed on the only good square! This isn't possible! To be that lucky- - -"

"We get it," frowned Noah. "What's so good about it?"

Chris blinked and shook off his awe. "On this square, you get a complimentary smoothie. And I don't mean Chef's crap. I mean, a real smoothie. A really good smoothie." A machine popped up, whirred for a while, and out popped a glass with a delicious-looking yellow and pink smoothie.

Blake took a look at it and shook his head. "Uh, no thanks. I'll pass."

Chris raised an eyebrow. "I'd drink it if I were you. If you don't, your team loses. And you probably get voted out."

"I don't know," sighed Blake. "Smoothies have sugar. Sugar makes me hyper. And when I'm hyper, I get- - -"

"Hungry?" suggested Owen, butting his way into the conversation. "Because I'm always hungry when I'm hyper. Well, and when I'm calm. And glad. Sad. Mad. Bad. Rad. Come to think of it, I'm always hungry. Anyone got a chicken leg?"

Blake ignored the fat boy. "Fine. I'll drink it. But I'm warning you, you are not going to like this." He downed the cup in one gulp. Nothing happened immediately.

Meanwhile, the Crazy Crazies were only seven spaces away from the finish line. "Victory is so close I can taste it!" exclaimed Zoey.

Staci nodded. "Yah, my great-great-grandpa Percy Snackson invented victory. Before that, everyone had to lose."

Suddenly, Blake screamed at the top of his lungs in a Scottish accent. "AHAAA! SCOOTISH PEOPLES NEVER LOSE! COME ON TEAM, TO VICTORY WE GO!"

Staci looked around, confused. "Yah, what the heck?"

Noah groaned. "Yahoo. Another asylum-ready lunatic."

"Are you talking aboot me, eh?" asked Zeke.

"Yeah. Sure. Whatever lets you sleep at night."

"Someone roll!" ordered Chris. "We need another Team Versus Team challenge before Dynamite Time!"

"SCOOTISH DYNAMITE! THOT'S WOT WE NEED!" yelled Blake in his Scottish accent.

Owen disagreed. "We need Mr. Coconut's expert advice. What should we do to win, Mr. Coconut?" Mr. Coconut said nothing.

Noah glared at Blake. "Calm down! We don't need any more dynamite, you hear me?"

"ONE MINUTE TILL DYNAMITE TIME!" shouted Chris. "HURRY UP!"

Heather looked around at her team. Lightning was holding the die. "Roll! Roll, you morons!"

"We're- - -"

"Don't sing!" screamed the queen bee in Annette's face.

Static

Mike/Bob: WOWEE I LIKE CAKE WAHAHAHAH WOWEE

Static

End of Confessionals

Bob scratched his neck with his leg and licked Dawn's arm, grossing her out. "CHICKENS ARE EVIL BECAUSE HE'S A EVIL FEATHER BALL THING WITH LEGS!"

Blake smiled a mile wide. "IT'S DYNAMITE TIME, NOOOOO, SCOOTISH DYNAMITE TIME! CHICKENS OR NO, WE'RE GONNA BLOW US OUR WAYS TO VICTORY! GET READY FOR THE BIG BOOM!" He pulled some very shiny explosives out of his back pocket.

"How'd he get that?" asked Lightning, confuddled.

Blake lit the 'Scootish dynamite' and threw it in a box.

Noah sighed, relieved. "Don't worry guys. There's no way such a small bit of TNT could even harm us."

"Yah, my great-aunt Oogaboogacrooga invented TNT. Before her, people could only blow themselves up by turning on a blender and not putting on the lid. Yah, and that always made a mess."

Blake frowned at the pathological liar. "AAAAAAGH! SCOOTLAND FOREVER!" He then spontaneously grabbed Noah, rsan over to the boxes of TNT scattered around, and stuck him in one where the Scottish Dynamite was. "AAAAIE! JUST STAY THERE, YEH ANNOYIN' SHORT LADDY!"

"Are you insane?!" screamed Noah. "NOW THIS COULD HARM ME! A LOT!" The sarcastic bookworm shut his eyes tightly, and a huge boom rattled the entire game board, sending the egghead sailing through the air, landing on the finish line. All the Psychos cheered.

Owen was elated. "Blake! Blake! You did it!" He tossed Mr. Coconut up in the air, and the fruit hit him in the head, knocking him unconscious.

Zeke was just as happy. "We won, eh! Hoooray!"

Dawn smiled. "Blake, your Scottish aura saved us all!" In the background, a soot-covered Noah looked up. He saw Blake and glared.

Chris was wide-eyed. "Wow. I never thought I'd say this, but, congratulations Blake. Your strange and somewhat disturbing Scotland-ness got the Psycho Psychos the first team victory of the season!"

"WHAAHAAHA! NESSIE IS A SCOOTISH GIRL DINOSUAR MONSTAH!"

Heather growled at her team. "You morons! You never listen to me!" She turned to Chris furiously. "How'd they win?! They didn't even roll the die!"

The middle-aged host shrugged. "First rule of Monotrapdungeonsorrychessopoly: There are no rules!"

Heather stomped her foot. "No. No! I refuse to accept this. You can't make me go to the campfire ceremony. The other team cheated!"

"Well, Heather, so did you. Fifty-two times, by my count. And therefore, your team lost!"

Noah was glad to have won but still rather pissed at Blake and Chris. "'By your count'? You can't count!"

"Fine, Chef was the counter here," admitted Chris. "Geez."

Bob inhaled sharply and went back to Mike. "Aaaghh. What just happened? Oh man! Bob just had to come out and ruin the game again! I'm sorry, guys!" Most of his teammates gave him dirty looks, with the exception of Zoey, of course.

She patted him on the shoulder. "It's okay, Mike. It's only a game."

"No, it's not sha-okay!" protested Lightning. "The Lightning needs to win! Sha-losers!"

Chris shook his head bemusedly at Lightning. "Well too bad. 'Cause you all know what's next..."

Static

(Heather gulps)

Static

(Mike gulps)

Static

(Lightning yawns)

Static

End of Confessionals


The campers are seated in various places, some on logs, and some on barrels, all around the campfire. Chris stared at them solemnly, gesturing at the platter he held in his hand. "I have here five marshmallows. Everyone on the Crazy Crazies team who receives one is off the hook. But one camper here will not receive one, henceforth ending their time on the island."

"This is crazy, eh!" chuckled Ezekiel, popping up between Lightning and Staci. "The first day where no one can even vote for me!"

"Get out Zeke!" yelled the host. "This isn't even your marshmallow ceremony!"

"Well, I like watchin' 'em, eh."

Chris sighed. "Fine. Just go sit on the ground somewhere."

"A'yup, sir."

Chris quickly got back to business. "Ignoring Zeke, tonight's first marshmallow goes to...Zoey!"

The redhead caught her marshmallow. "Yay!"

"Staci and Annette, you're both safe," continued Chris. He tossed them both marshmallows. Annette started to sing, Staci started to lie, and Zeke started to say something stupid, but Chris shushed them. "Then, this one's for...

...

...

...

...

...

...Lightning! Take your sha-marshmallow, dude!"

Lightning fist-pumped. "Aw yeah! Lightning's safe! Sha-awesome! Sha-awesome! Sha-awesome!"

"Where's my marshmallow, eh?"

"Shut up!" said Heather to Zeke, before something hit her. "Wait! Where's my marshmallow?!"

"Be patient," advised Chris. "You'll get yours. On second thought, maybe you won't. It's you and Mike. Tonight's bottom two."

Annette smirked at the queen bee. "Heather and Mike are left! Only one will get a marshmallowy gift!"

Mike shook his head sadly. "That doesn't even rhyme." The terrible singer shrugged.

Chris exhaled slowly. "Okay. Moving on. Mike. Your insanity was a little too un-nerving for the second day in a row. Heather. Your evil thoughts, words, and actions have made a bad reputation even worse, not to mention it was your cheating that lost the challenge. But only one of you will survive. The last 'mallow goes to...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...Heather. Sadly. Guess she did get her marshmallow after all." Heather caught her token of safety and sneered at Mike.

Mike sighed. "Darn! At least...at least Bob won't injure anyone else."

Heather laughed. "Haha! In your face, loser. I'm well on my way to being the winner."

Zoey was frustrated. "No! Come on! There's gotta be some sort of mix up!" She frowned at Heather. "STOP GLOATING!" The indie chick's face turned red, and Heather slowly backed away from her.

Mike laid a hand on her shoulder comfortingly. "It's okay, Zoey. We're all probably better off this way."

Chris slammed a button on the podium he stood in front of. "Hasta la Vista, Mike slash Bob!" The trapdoor opened under Mike and he fell down the Chute of Shame into the underground version of Playa des Losers.

The MPD teen stood up. Thankfully his landing had been soft and Bob had not come out. Mike glanced around. "What the- - -?"

Izzy popped out of the shadows. "HAHAHAA! IZZY IS NO LONGER ALONE! You can help me plot my escape!"

Mike groaned. "Oh man..."

"Okay, listen up new guy. Izzy already has a plan. It just might work. WHO AM I KIDDING?! IZZY'S PLANS ALWAYS WORK!"

"Actually, I'm just gonna head to the vending machine, so..."


Back above ground, Chris was standing on the dock, with the remaining Crazies in the background.

"Well, this was an interesting episode. Monotrapdungeonsorrychessopoly seems to be a big success! Don't forget to order your own one before they're all sold out! Which I'm sure they will be! 'Cause someone will certainly buy them! Sometime soon! I hope! Just buy it, kid. Anyways, what's gonna happen to the rest of these campers? Why are my inventions so awesome? And will Heather ever get kicked off the island?"

"Hey!" yelled the queen bee in the background.

"Find out next time on TOTAL, DRAMA, TWIST!

Instead of going to the ending credits, the scene cut to the woods, where two dark figures stood. They slowly came into focus.

"Okay, listen up," said Noah. "This is important."

"What is, eh?" asked Zeke.

Noah rolled his eyes. "What I brought you here to talk about. Remember?"

"What was that again? I forgot, eh."

"Our alliance. Ring a bell?"

"Yep! No. Can you explain it again?"

Noah rolled his eyes again. "Fine. Blake is a danger to our team. He needs to go. The purpose of this alliance is just that- - -to vote him off."

"I don't know," said Ezekiel. "He seems like sooch a nice guy, eh. And he did help us win..."

"If Blake stays, then you go. Do you want that to happen?" The prairie boy furiously shook his head 'no'. "Good. I thought so. Shake on it?"

"A'yup." The two shook hands, and the screen went black. The credits played.

Voting Confessionals

Static

Staci: Hmm. I vote for Lightning. Y'know, my great-great-grandma Dolores invented lightning, and he has the nerve to get named after my ancestor's creation! I can't stand copy-cats! That, and pathological liars.

Static

Annette: I vote for Heather! So I can take a breather!

Static

Lightning: Sha-Voting! I choose...Mike. Or Bob? Or whoever it is. Seeya later, Bobmikewhoeveryouare!

Static

Heather: There's a sliver of a difference between the two here I would like most to see get kicked off. But Bob is actually even more annoying than Annette. Not to mention I am definitely on the chopping block after today. Voting for the psycho is a strategic move. Goodbye Mike, and your alter-ego too.

Static

Mike: I can sum up my day in two words: I sucked. I can't believe how terrible Bob was! If I stay here much longer, he might end up injuring someone...or even worse! I have to vote for myself. It's the right thing to do.

Static

Zoey: I vote for Heather. Mike told her not to cheat, but she didn't listen. Grr!

Static

Mike/Bob: 3

Heather: 2

Lightning: 1

Annette: 0

Staci: 0

Zoey: 0

Team Invincibility: Blake, Dawn, Ezekiel, Mr. Coconut, Noah, Owen

Eliminated: Izzy, Mike

Psycho Psychos: Blake, Dawn, Ezekiel, Mr. Coconut, Noah, Owen

Crazy Crazies: Annette, Heather, Lightning, Staci, Zoey

Well, there you go guys, Episode 2. I'm really sorry to all Mike fans; he's even one of my favorite characters. Don't worry though, just like Izzy, he still has a pretty big role to play. I'll be redoing Episode 3 soon. Hopefully no Scottish people take offense to Blake's hyper alter ego, I'm part Scottish myself and it's meant purely for fun.

~TIAW Mr. Coconut Beatle

Next Time: With Zoey unbelievably mad, Blake unbelievably crazy, and Noah unbelievably cunning, will the contestants even survive a game of Capture the Flag? Especially when the flags end up being not quite...normal.