Welcome to yet another chapter of your favorite poorly written fanfiction. Traditionally we start with author notes.
I do not own Harry Potter
This story has a somewhat interesting plot but is rather poorly written, you have been warned.
New Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
The new Headmaster's office had nearly nothing in common with the old one. It was located on the top of the highest tower which was located in the middle of the new castle. The walls and ceiling were made from transparent crystal and allowed people inside the office to watch over the entire castle and it's surrounding grounds. The office hold only two pieces of furniture, a huge U-shaped desk and a throne like chair for the Headmaster. The desk was so large that to get something from it's side one had to stand up and walk to it or use magic to get it. Despite not being very practical it had served it's primary purpose - to show off the importance of the man behind it. According to Dumbledore the lack of other furniture and empty transparent walls also helped to maintain image that person residing in the office, namely him, was someone of great importance (the truth was that you can't hang anything on those walls as it's back will be visible from the outside, but Dumbledore found out about it after his new office was made). There were only two ways to get into the new office, a hidden entrance to Headmaster's private set of rooms and a public entrance located in the center of the room. From that entrance emerged Severus Snape.
It was second day of his stay in this new castle, for most of the summer Snape lived in an undisclosed location with many powerful wards cast on his house, he cut off all contact with the outside world during that time thus he was quite shocked to see what happened during past several months. Snape spent previous day on reading the newspapers from past two months and preparing his new quarters and classroom. It would take some time for the classroom to get a good gloomy atmosphere, but with some proper charms he should finish before 1st October, after all he couldn't allow children to learn in a well lit and ventilated classroom. Unfortunately Headmaster had summoned him interrupting his very important task.
"Blasted desk, I can't do anything around here." Dumbledore was annoyed, the desk was to large to comfortably use and too small to keep all important documents and books. He regretted ordering his new office being made that way.
"Headmaster, did you wish to see me?" Snape announced his presence.
"Oh yes, Severus. I have a very important task for you. Lord Nabilius is proving to be quite troublesome. Destruction of the Gringotts was very helpful, thanks to him those troublesome Goblins won't stand in our way any longer. Losing Hogwarts on the other hand was disastrous. I have lost most of my blackmail material, due to that my political block is falling apart. We have to find Granger and use her to gather support."
Severus Snape was, as Evil Overlord List would say, Dumbledore's 'trusted lieutenant'. He knew most of the plans made by Headmaster and he helped execute quite a lot of them. Most successful and difficult one was destruction of the wannabe Dark Lord Tom Riddle aka 'Lord' Voldemort. They could kill Voldemort any time they wanted. The goal was to kill him in a 'proper' way and that required several years of planning and nearly two decades of implementation.
"I understand Headmaster that you wish me to brew Localization Potion? You are aware that my stock of the more questionable potion ingredients was also destroyed?" Snape inquired the old man.
"I am aware of that Severus, I have contacted Mister Diego in Spain and prepared a Portkey that will take you to him. The Portkey will leave in two hours, I believe that is enough time for you to prepare?" Snape nodded. "Here is the gold for the purchase, I hope it will be enough, if not feel free to use our accounts in Spain." Dumbledore handed Snape bag with gold.
"I understand. Now if you do not mind I have to prepare."
"Of course, Severus. Have a safe trip." Snape has took the Portkey and left.
The entire conversation was being relayed to certain hotel room in London, courtesy of a laser microphone installed near the castle and aimed at Dumbledore's office. In said room conversation was watched by a single blond haired girl. Harry, Hermione and Ted has left to Eastern Europe to finalize purchases of the farmlands thus the decision what to do was left to Luna.
"I am sure professor will appreciate that several parts of him will have a chance to become something he loves..." Luna said as she was making a floo call to a certain pair of 'curse breakers'.
Two hours later
Somewhere in Spain
Severus Snape appeared in an old mundane looking magazine. He was well used to the long range Portkey travel and as soon as he regained his balance he did fool sweep of the surrounding area. He saw only one person standing there, supposedly his contact but one could never be sure when dealing with illegal business, especially when his supposed contact was wearing muggle suit rather than traditional robes. The man himself looked like average thirty year old, which meant nothing if he was a wizard, polijuice was quite common when it came to illegal dealings. Unfortunately Snape's stock was destroyed along with Hogwarts and he didn't have time to brew a new one.
"Are you that British guy Snip?" The man said with audible Spanish accent.
"My name is Snape. Do you have the required items?"
"Sorry about that, had to make sure I got the right guy." Those words made Snape nervous, before he could apparate he felt a little sting in the back of his neck and after that Snape felt no more.
Severus Snape has awaken. He noted that his situation wasn't very good, he was half naked and tied to a bed in a dark room. He tried apparition but a huge headache told him that wards are present. His 'official' emergency portkey was gone, he had a second one – a small piece of metal hidden under the skin, unfortunately it was also gone. Knowing that he won't walk away from that he looked for a small capsule hidden in his tooth... it was also gone, whoever has captured him was a high class professional.
He heard door being opened and suddenly his eyes were assaulted by a very bright light right in front of him. After a few seconds he managed to open his eyes to see the room around him. He looked at the source of light above, it was a surgical lamp but Snape didn't know that. He was in the well equipped operating room, but again as a wizard he didn't know what all the devices around him do, for him it was a muggle torture chamber. Unfortunately it wasn't that far from the truth in this case.
"Ah, Mister Snape. It's so good you have awakened." The man who entered the room said with a calm voice.
Snape saw a man wearing a strange blue robes, a very weird gloves and a blue hat. The man's mouth and nose was covered in a blue mask made from simple material. In a normal circumstances Snape would say that said man wasn't very threatening, the circumstances were far from normal.
"Do you expect me to talk?"
"No mister Snape, I expect you to die." The man chuckled and continued. "Goldfinger, great movie. We even have a laser scalper around here, unfortunately it is not powerful enough co cut through the entire human body."
Snape didn't understand any of that, he heard about fingers made of silver, but gold? And what was that lay-zer thing? Some torture device probably.
"If you want me dead, why bother will all of that?"
"Because Mister Snape you, or your body to be precise, will provide us with a hefty profit."
The realization hit Snape, this man will harvest him for potion ingredients!
"No, it's not what you think Mister Snape. That's only a rumor we started a while ago, magicals would never understand the true purpose of 'acquiring' bodies. Selling your whole organs is much more profitable than turning them into ingredients. By the way, do you as a potion master even know any potions requiring human body parts? No? Thought so. Let me explain this to you, we have some time before I start and I always wanted to do a villainous monologue."
The man gagged Snape and started preparing equipment for the operation, he did it in a way that would allow Snape to see all the 'tools' he had.
"Did you know Mister Snape that with our magic organs transplanted from a wizard or a witch are never rejected? Add the ability to keep them in stasis for indefinite amount of time and 'harvesting' a single wizard like yourself can earn us about ten to twenty million dollars on the black market. That's about fifteen million pounds or three million galleons. Obviously with several potions we can easily and safely regrow organs, only reason it's not commonly done is that many people who loose some crucial organs do not live long enough to give them said potion. Other are too stubborn to take it, I heard that there was a British Auror that has lost an eye and one of his legs, yet he refused the treatment. Maybe because said potion was discovered by a muggleborn? You probably have heard of her, Lilly Evans a brilliant potion mistress. Unfortunately in your case we won't be using that potion to fix the damage. Our client also had a special request, in normal case we use Drought of Living Death to keep person alive yet without any life signs allowing us to perform operation and provide them with the potion to regrow lost organs before waking them up. It's much easier to pay for a willing subject than search for a recently dead body. In your case our client has requested a special version of the Drought – you will be fully aware of what's happening to you for the entire time. After we finish we will dump you in your British hospital, if they manage to fix you, great. If not? Well, you can blame your nation's prejudices for your death." The door to the room opened and another person has entered. "Ah, my assistant has finished the potion, shall we start?" The surgeon has raised a small saw and activated it for a second with an audible buzz. At that point Snape would rather face another insane mass murdering Dark Lord than stay there with those people, but he had no choice and as soon as the potion was forced into his throat he had lost ability to move. After that there was only pain.
Magical ways of travel are rather limited. One can use a broom, floo, apparition or a portkey. There was no known way to move large objects using any of those, this caused the trade in the Magical World to be rather limited. Most nations were self sufficient as the only way to move goods between destinations is to pack them inside magically enlarged bags and use available transport to get to the destination. The Flying Carpets that could hold large amount of goods were banned in the every ICW country. That was why when Harry proposed to use a portkey to hijack the Hogwarts Express both girls thought he was insane. Of course, this caused Luna to immediately love that idea and Hermione to claim that it was impossible. The portkey could only move several people touching it, it had an advantage over apparition as it didn't cause 'splinching', it allowed for much accurate travel, it allowed for various triggers to initiate travel and most importantly – after it was made anyone could use it, the only thing the user had to know was how to activate the portkey. The Harry reminded two girls that the portkey transports one more thing – itself. If they turned a train car into a portkey the car would transport itself and everyone touching it. It should even transport everything else that is inside but that was to be tested.
The plan was relatively simple, Hermione and Luna created a set of coordinates and Harry started turning train cars into portkeys, it caused some trouble as a single casting drained Harry for a day. But even with this drawback they were ready for the start of the school year. The portkey has transported the train two miles west of the British coast and... fifty miles high in the air. Fortunately for the passengers the charms on the train prevented the luggage from flying around and injuring them, the charms extended to the passengers making them ignore acceleration thus the first thing the children noticed was a sudden lack of their parents, siblings, older and younger friends and... the station itself. Second thing they noticed was lack of the ground under them, or rather the ground was there... fifty miles away. On this day many magical raised children also learned that Earth is not flat as they thought. Then the screaming has started.
The children were not the only people who panicked at that moment, sudden appearance of a such large object caused many radar operators in the Western Europe to become highly distressed. No one knew if the object was a meteor, some sort of a plane, a nuclear warhead or even an alien ship. Royal Air Force has scrambled a pair of fighters and sent them to watch the area where the 'object' was supposed to land (or as some said – crash). When the fighters arrived they saw a steam train full of children. One of the pilots even flew next to the train and watched as the engine driver calmly waved at him and even greeted him with a long whistle the pilot managed to hear despite all the noise around.
When the train reached altitude of ten miles it started to slow down, Hermione of all people demanded to add this little feature. It caused radar operators and pilots accompanying the train to be even more surprised, the train has slowed down to eighty eight miles per hour and when it reached five miles altitude it disappeared leaving only two parallel lines of fire on what it should be it's path. The event was quickly made top secret and conveniently forgotten, even without memory charms bureaucracy can do wonders to 'forget'. Some rumors about it managed to reach the press, but only one tabloid decided to mention it.
The Hogwarts Express has reappeared several minutes later in the same spot it has left. Adults on the platform rushed into the train, parents trying to find their kids and check if they are fine, Aurors trying to figure out what has happened, reporters asking hundreds of questions and even the Minister himself shoving that he is doing 'something'. As the kids could only convey what they saw and now what has happened Aurors and the Minister went to the engine driver who managed to answer all their questions . No one ever wondered how a mere engine driver knew that they were transported by a portkey, how high the train has been transported or how fast it was falling down, if they did they could discover that the driver was actually Harry in disguise who took a ride in case the return portkey didn't work and the backup plan had to be used. It was quite obvious that Aurors had little to none knowledge how to conduct a proper investigation.
After finally completing his last act of mayhem Harry took both girls for a little sightseeing. Both of them had their share of modern world, Hermione during her summers and Luna in Japan thus they were surprised when he proposed that activity. Their destination was a simple ten floor building. It was a typical modern office building, entire thing was covered in glass. Harry simply stood in front of it and with a wide smile on his face announced.
"Ta-da!" His arms pointing towards the building.
"Bravo." Hermione mockingly clapped her hands. Luna stood and watched the building.
"Oh you people, have some faith. This building is the new headquarters of White Industries. Come on." Harry invited them inside. "First floor will be a foyer, whatever that means. Next three will serve as a mundane administrative center of the company. Fifth floor will do the same but it will be magical administration and sale. We have to figure out wards for that and floo connection."
Harry past through empty reception desk and went to the elevators.
"In the last five floors we will have our library and living quarters." Harry continued when elevator took them to fourth floor.
"Finally, you know how annoying is to move books from one bag to another? I barely managed to do anything." Hermione complained.
"Well, sorry to tell you that but you still won't be able to do much job with that." After the door opened Harry led them to the largest office on the floor. "Hermione, that's because you are the new CEO of White Industries." Harry shoved them door with a golden plate on it saying 'Hermione Granger, Chief Executive Officer'.
"What? Why me?" Hermione was shocked after hearing the news.
"Well, you said you wanted a carrier. The French refused to sell me one of them so I will provide you with second best thing." Harry explained.
"Harry, you know very well it's not 'carrier' but career. Wait, you actually DID ask them if they would sell you one?" Harry only nodded. "What is it with you and large ships?"
"I thought we could use it as a luxury cruise ship. It would require rebuilding but with magic it shouldn't be that difficult. We would have enough space for everything, library, main offices, living quarters, guest rooms, helipad. Heck, we could buy some illegal gunships and raid ex-Deatheater manors. Let's get inside, there is no point in standing when we can sit in an comfortable chairs."
"Harry, I hate to break your fun, but manors are warded in a way that fires all electronics." Hermione said after they entered. The office was empty. "Uh... you mentioned sitting?"
"Sorry about that, I didn't know what kind of furniture you want, modern glass and steel or more traditional looking wood panels and desk? It's your office so me and Ted left it for you to furnish." Harry quickly conjured some chairs for them.
"Hermione, are you aware that mundanes have long ago created electronics circuits that are resistant to magic? Although it's a side effect as the mayor goal was for them to survive an EMP that is caused by nuclear weapons. It's a pity that Hogwarts never updated their curriculum." Luna said.
"WHAT? Hogwarts is not the best school in Europe?" Hermione was outraged, she always thought that Hogwarts was a prime school in the Europe and quite possibly in the entire world.
"Oh, I am sure it's the best school in the Europe." Luna tried to placate Hermione.
"I don't know Luna, Russia, and many of their ex-satellite states are part of the Magical United Nations. With that population they sure have some good schools out there. Due all that animosity between them they have probably created several schools after Soviet Union has fallen."
"Magical United Nations? Isn't ICW the magical equivalent of the UN?" Hermione was puzzled.
"It WAS equivalent of the UN. The official story is that after WWII many countries wanted changes in the law and schooling system which was exactly the thing you saw at Hogwarts. The reason was Grindevald, several hundred of his supporters has killed over ten thousand magical troops sent to stop him. Magicals fighting with the allies fought like... idiots for the lack of the better word. They sought a large scale battles where they charged their opponents and used non-lethal spells to subdue them. Grindevald's forces fought like a military, lethal spells, ambushes, team tactic, using cover, support fire etc. After the war many countries wanted to teach people how to actually defend themselves. The standard curriculum doesn't have ANY lethal spells in it, best thing you can get is Reductor curse and it's not required to pass your NEWTs. But the new ICW leader refused to change claiming that the spells they wanted to add were 'dark'. The result was that many countries have left the ICW. Right now the ICW consists of the countries from the Western Europe. There are some other countries outside Europe that have stayed like India, but they are a minority." Harry ended his lecture.
"I... I never knew that. I always thought that International in the ICW stands for the entire world." Hermione was shocked by the news. "Wait, you mentioned 'official' story, what is the unofficial one?"
"Do you know how the votes in the ICW are counted?" Hermione shocked her head. "It's quite peculiar, the British representative is voting for the US, Canada, Australia and several other places that are now independent states but were once British colonies. Same is for the Spain, France, Germany and Portugal. Many countries outside the Europe were 'allowed' to have a representative, but said representative has no real power. No sane governments wants to be part of a system like that so when a good excuse to rally the public showed up they took it and used it as a reason to leave. India has stayed because due to the voting system they have about a dozen votes, in the MUN they would have only one. Luna could probably explain better as she actually lived in a MUN country, I only visited several of them to see the differences."
"Luna? What did I miss by staying at Hogwarts?"
"Well... most courses are updated to match current scientific and magical knowledge. Arithmacy is done on the computers, astronomy uses modern telescopes including pictures from Hubble, potions includes chemistry, runes use CNC to create perfect words. Most difference is when you compare DADA courses, Hogwarts NEWTs are equal to the first three or four years. After that you cover 'light' lethal courses like Reductor or Bombarda. NEWT level education is centered around 'dark' curses, including the Unfogivables. As a part of the examination you are required to throw off the Imperius, to do that for the two years you take special potions to build up a resistance to the mind affecting effects. Right now I probably know more 'dark' spells than Bellatrix Lestrange. The schools also have various mundane subjects including physical education and sometimes martial arts. My school day lasted for nearly twelve hours, after that we were sent six hours back in time to give us additional free time for homework and fun." During the explanation Hermione eyes were widening with every second.
"And I missed all of that? Does Australia have similar schools?"
"As far as I know yes, they are part of the MUN. I do not know about the Time Turners, but from what I learned they are used in many larger schools."
"I. Will. Kill. McGonagall." Hermione was seething with anger. "Thanks to that bitch I have wasted seven years of my life on a substandard education! Let me guess, my NEWTs are not recognized outside ICW?"
"You need to pass additional tests, if you do you will be awarded with MUN OWLs... The NEWT level material is equivalent of the ICW masteries and even with the ICW mastery you might have problems passing some MUN NEWTs."
"If I knew... If I only knew I would have kicked McGonagall out faster that you can say Quidditch." When the anger has left Hermione she sat and buried her head into her hands sobbing quietly.
"So... a Time Turner and some school books for your late birthday gift?" Hermione nodded not removing hands covering her face. "Don't worry. From what I am hearing it could be good idea to learn some of this stuff myself. I can hire tutors for both of us and we can use a Time Turner to get enough hours in a day to do everything." Harry tried to cheer her up.
"Really? You would do that for me? After everything I did?" Hermione said through her tears.
"Hermione, name me one person from our year whose life wasn't ruined by the Ministry, Dumbledore or Voldemort." Hermione tried to open her mouth but Harry stopped her. "And Sally-Anne Perks doesn't count, she has left the Hogwarts after first year. Just one person." Hermione has closed her mouth and remained silent. "See? There isn't anyone like that. In a normal world Hogwarts would be closed the moment the Sorting is mentioned, the thing looks like a horror version of those various sociological experiments. Let's dump ambitious kids into one group, tell everyone (including them) that they are now evil and see how many of them succumbs to the peer pressure. That itself wouldn't be too bad, but add an evil idiot who gathers all of them to wage a war against everyone else for no good reason and you have our current situation."
Harry continued. "Average idiot on the street thinks that there were two sides in the war – Dark and Light. That's not true, there was over a dozen sides and factions. Dumbledore, the Ministry, Voldemort, neutrals, light neutral families, dark neutral families, bystanders, Death Eaters... what? Didn't you notice that most of them has dumped Voldemort the moment he dropped dead? I heard they claimed Imperious again... Finally there was me. I consider myself an independent faction in that war."
"But why are you helping me?" She asked Harry.
"The saying 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend' has no application in the Magical World, it should go something like 'the enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy, nothing more nothing less'. We were members of the opposite factions waging a war. Now that both of us has retired I see no reason to not try and mend fences, especially after I got my payback."
"You prat, I had to fuck old purebloods!" Hermione said in an accusatory fashion.
"It couldn't be as bad as fucking Weasley. And you said it yourself that you enjoyed parts of that."
"Hermione, I did not know you were into that kind of things." Luna choose that moment to join the discussion. "It is true what they say about the quiet ones. We should capitalize on that, I always wanted to try one of those cat suits. What about you Harry?"
"Uhm... I am fine, have fun both of you?" Harry said not being sure himself what did he mean by that.
"Yay! Let's raid some sex shops!"
Harry watched as Luna grabbed still sobbing Hermione and dragged her discussing differences between latex and leather on the way. He thought that it might not be the best way to deal with the PTSD but the Magical World was several centuries behind and they didn't even know what PTSD is, the therapy was as alien to them as 'elected kitty' or electricity. Fortunately he ordered some basic furniture for three rooms on the living floors so everyone had a place to sleep, he might as well start placing silencing charms on their rooms. Harry felt he would need them soon.
White Industries HQ, London
"Harry, you should probably see this." Hermione said as she thrown a newspaper in front of him.
"The Prophet has finally written about your little stunt with the Hogwarts Express."
"Lord Nabilius strikes again?"
"Not exactly... "
Magical Britain World's Prime Magical Nation.
By Randomina Reporterus
The Ministry has finally announced the truth behind events that happened on the 1st October, this is the official speech given by the Minister Scrimgeour in front of the International Confederation of Wizards.
"Witches and wizards of the International Confederation of Wizards and our fellow guests. British brilliancy knows no bounds, our wizards and witches has created a device, which we called the Industrial Portkey It is named after Unspeakable William Industrious whose research was crucial in creating the device. The Industrial Portkey is capable of transporting incredibly large objects which we have proved by transporting the entire Hogwarts Express with everyone on board. By doing so we have literally reached a new height of magical knowledge as the Industrial Portkey has transported Hogwarts Express hundred and fifty thousand miles high in air. During the travel back to ground we have tested yet another device known as Magical Bird, it is a novel approach to personal travel and should test prove to be successful it should replace the traditional brooms. The Magical Bird accompanied the Hogwart Express during the way back and both of them had managed to achieve yet another miraculous feat - they had breached the sound barrier. Never before a magical vehicle has managed to accomplish such goals, proving once more British and ICW superiority over rest of the world, both muggle and magical."
More on Industrial Portkey and Magical Bird page 4
The New Height of Magical Knowledge page 9
The Unbreakable Sound Barrier page 17
Minister Scrimgeour Oration in front of the ICW page 12
International Reactions page 16
"Wow, we are better than I know. Our portkeys have reached an altitude of hundred and fifty thousand miles."
"WHAT?" Hermione grabbed the newspaper out of Harry's hands and started reading.
"That's impossible Hermione. They simply made up all those numbers, wizards are terrible at math." Luna said.
"Check the international reactions, anything interesting?" Harry told her.
"Uhm... no, it looks like MUN representatives think it's a joke."
"It's not surprising, the relationship between MUN and ICW is a bit weird. The ICW thinks they are the Dumbledore and MUN is a Hogwarts first year while MUN considers the ICW a bunch of local kids who sometime visit them claiming their cardboard box is a spaceship. Fun to mention as an anecdote during conversation but otherwise not important enough to be reported in newspapers." Luna answered.
"So... what do we do?" Hemrione asked both of them.
"I don't know about you, but I am going to kill Snape... again." Harry said and left to plan yet another murder of his favorite potion professor.
New Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
Isabella Zall was a very confused witch. Her entire adventure with magic was nothing but confusing. It has started in August when Professor McGonagall has showed up in front of her door and presented her with her Hogwarts letter. She then proceeded to prove that magic was in fact real by turning a table into a pig. The entire show was nothing more than a common trick, you couldn't kill and it the animal as it would turn back into a table, it would also turn back after some time as it wasn't something called 'permanent transfiguration'. Why did they teach such parlor tricks at the school she did not know. What was even more confusing was the reaction of her parents. She has never told them about the 'accidents' she had during her life, her mother was a psychiatrist and father was a psychologist, telling them that she has once managed to make things levitate to her would undoubtedly cause them to start some sort of treatment But now the professor from a real school of magic has proven that the magic was real and that their own daughter was a witch, their reaction was... calm. Such world changing event and they have treated it like yesterday news. Isabella knew her parents for her entire life and she had known that there were occasions when they were more surprised or shocked than that. It wasn't even case of shock as after Professor McGonagall has left they have behaved normally, asked her when she wants to go to the magical shopping district, does she want some sort of pet mentioned in the letter and casually started discussing costs of her endeavor into the world of magic.
The surprises didn't stop there. Less than a week after the not-so-world-shattering-news she was informed by an official Ministry letter that Hogwarts has been destroyed by some sort of a dark lord. Due to that the school year was suspended indefinitely. Her dreams of learning magic were shattered. The kids raised in the Magical World could get some help from their parents, she didn't have such possibility. No more than two weeks later the Ministry has announced that due to sudden influxof income Hogwarts will be rebuilt, it will take some time so new school year will start in October rather than in September. Isabella was overjoyed.
The happiness didn't last long, the Ministry and the magical parliament with a weird name announced a new law that prohibited muggleborns like Isabella from attending Hogwarts. Her parents only shrugged when they heard the news, saying something about taking them long enough. Isabella didn't understand why they meant by that. The very next day their house was visited by a very concerned Ministry employee who explained that a child without a proper magical education was a danger to itself and people around it, which was weird as Professor McGonagall said nothing like that. The Ministry employee then went around explaining that there was a loophole in the new law which they could use, obviously using such loophole was dangerous for his career and could get him fired so he would require a hefty financial compensation for the trouble. When her parents asked about the loophole the man has said that the new law applied to muggleborns, so if Isabella became a halfblood by a virtue of having a squib grandparent the law would no longer apply to her. Apparently it was quite common for squibs to venture into the non magical world so no one would see anything weird if her grandparent proved to be a squib. Her parents didn't give a definite answer and the man has left saying he will come tomorrow. Isabella pleaded to be allowed to attend Hogwarts, her parents said tentatively that they will do as much as they can.
If that was confusing, the second visit of the Ministry employee was outright crazy. The man shoved up without announcement right in the middle of their living room, before he could say a word two red beams of light hit him right in the chest. Isabella saw her parents, both of them with a wand pointed at the man now lying on the floor. Her mother muttered some words and the man started floating, he was then tied by some ropes and his wand flew from him to her mother. Isabelle's father told her to leave the room until they deal with the intruder. She complied but decided to eavesdrop on the conversation.
She heard her father saying something in a language similar to Latin followed by large amount of obscenities from their 'guest', the obscenities stopped as suddenly as they started. Then she heard her father explain the man in a very calm voice that he has entered their home uninvited and they are within their rights to blast him into pieces, she heard the man tried to argue but her father only explained that there won't even BE any investigation, the cleaning charms were perfectly able to remove unattached body parts and blood strains. Her mother has explained to the man that he will now make Isabella into a halfblood so she can attend Hogwarts, if he refuses they will go to DMLE and have him investigated for breaking attempt and attempted murder. The second charge won't last but it will be enough for investigation to start and the first one will be enough to have him fired. The man quickly agreed and then she heard a loud CRACK.
Her parents gave her a laconic explanation that they were magical and have left the Magical World after graduation. Some mysteries were finally resolved.
Her home was also visited by someone form Australian embassy claiming to represent a school which was an alternative to Hogwarts, she said she will be going to Hogwarts but her parents took the pamphlets and contact information just in case she changed her mind.
The trip was... interesting. It was the moment when Isabella decided that she was hit with the old Chinese curse and she is now living in the 'interesting times'. The train had teleported somewhere and started to fall down very fast, she saw Earth's curve from the window which meant they were very high. There was even a jet fighter flying next to them for a while, but she barely noticed that during the screaming. Before they crashed the train teleported again, this time back to the place they left. From the panic she could see the whole teleporting train wasn't something anyone expected to happen, yet the very next day the local newspaper announced that it was actually a planned test of some sort of weird named device and everything was 'under control'. If that was the 'control' Isabella didn't want to see the panic in the Magical World.
That wasn't the end of the confusion. The Hogwarts proved to be... weird. The castle was huge, four separate wings (three were under construction) and a huge tower in the center with a glass spire. She was told that it was the Headmaster's office. Then there was the sorting, apparently accommodation was decided by a piece of leather, well... talking piece of leather. The talking piece of leather told her she posses huge amount of bravery and that she will be housed for seven years in the Gryffindor tower.
Isabella and bravery. Two words she never expected to hear in a single sentence, unless the sentence was something like 'Isabella Zall lacks any kind of bravery'. The puzzle was solved the next day when Isabella met several girls from Slytherin, the supposed enemy of Gryffindors. The Slytherins insulted Isabella calling her a 'mudblood', she patiently asked what does than mean and then proceeded to explain that said word is stupid and they should use better insults than that. After discussion ended she was approached by a prefect from Gryffindor who started berating her for acting in a non-Gryffindor way. What she was told could be summarized that as a Gryffindor she should either act as a young dashing hero jumping into fray without question or be a damsel in distress ready to be rescued by a young dashing hero jumping into fray without question. Patient and calm discussion was either done by Ravenclaws or Merlin forbid – Slytherins. She thanked the man for advice and left. That was the day she finally understood how the test subjects from various experiments her parents mentioned felt. The 'experiment' she was now participating was probably test of so called pack mentality, she would either keep her keen and quite cunning mind and discuss rather than fight (not that she had anything against fighting, it's just she didn't know how she could fight without knowing any spells) or become a stereotypical Gryffindor who didn't know what the word 'diplomacy' meant, not to mention such difficult words like 'subterfuge' or 'nonviolent conflict resolution'. That was also the moment she started regretting going to that place.
But it still wasn't the end of her 'interesting times'. It was Friday, end of her first week in the castle. And last lesson they had that week – potions. She hated Snape but according to what she heard the man was headmaster's friend and there was no way to stop his bullying. Strangely all classes were well lit and new, this one had dark walls that looked ancient despite being in use for less than a week. It was also poorly ventilated despite being a potion classroom where such ventilation should be very important. 'Professor' Snape was walking around the class, praising Slytherins and taking away points from Gryffindors. He saw a potion made by Isabella, before she could finish the man told her that she failed the assignment and vanished the potion. Of course he also took some points for that. When she finished packing she saw Snape staring into a cauldron and praising the Slytherin boy that made the potion.
Then the potion exploded. Or better word would be erupted, there was a vertical stream of fire leaving the cauldron, melting Snape's head and leaving large scorch mark on the ceiling. She saw the now beheaded man falling on the floor, fortunately the wound was cauterized so there was no blood. The entire class was speechless. Isabella still shocked quietly sat behind her table and waited. Apparently someone has left to get help because several minutes later the Headmaster himself has entered the room, he quickly assessed the situation and calmly said.
"There is no need to worry, your professor will be alright. He is little indisposed but I am sure our new medical wing will have him fixed in no time." Isabella thought that the man was joking, Snape was dead and he treated it as a simple case of flu! There is no way they can fix that, not with his head being completely GONE. She wanted to stand up and shout that but then Headmaster said something else.
Isabella has peeked out from her cover to see her entire class gathered in two groups, both groups were staring at the Headmaster with a glassy eyes. The headless body of Snape was being levitated next to Dumbledore.
"That should be enough, you will remember that cauldron has exploded harming Professor Snape's face, he then left to the infirmary. Also the Gryffindors will now consider Headmaster Dumbledore to be the greatest wizard ever, the Slytherins will hate all muggleborns with passion. Both groups will ignore muggle world and think that it is beneath us in every way."
She couldn't believe it, the Headmaster was using some sort of mind control on the students. Isabella quickly got back into her 'cover' and hopes that Dumbledore won't notice her. She heard footsteps and door being closed, then her classmates started talking.
"Did you see his face when it blew up?"
"Let's go, potions are canceled."
Her classmates has left in two separate groups discussing latest 'event'. No one said anything about Snape missing his head.
She has made a decision, staying at Hogwarts could be bad for her mental health, all kind of mind control is. She skipped the meal and went to her dormitory to gather her things. Then she remembered that she won't get far away with the entire trunk, older students could shrink it but asking for it might alert them about her intentions. She only took a bag with money, both mundane and magical and then left.
Getting to London was surprisingly easy, Isabella used the Floo in a town near the castle to get to the Leaky Cauldron, from there she went to find a phone and called her parents.
Two days later Isabella boarded a plane going to her new school in Australia.
White Industries HQ, London
"Damn it, he survived. AGAIN." Harry Potter shouted with anger in his voice.
"What is it Harry?" Hermione asked from her office.
"It's Snape. Yesterday he has died for the second time, yet today he is again 'teaching' as if nothing happened." Harry pointed at the screen he was looking at, there Hermione saw Snape in his classroom 'teaching'.
"Harry, we start hiring people in less than a week! You cannot bring surveillance from Hogwarts to the office!" Hermione scolded Harry.
"It's not my fault that computers in the living are are not yet working. Better tell me how is he doing that?"
"Didn't Voldemort teach you anything?"
"Horcruxes? But using them would cause him to become insane, despite what I think about Snape he is quite sane." Said Harry.
"From what you told me in our sixth year Riddle didn't find the whole ritual in the Restricted Section, maybe parts he found didn't work as intended? We will never know. Dumbledore has took those books from the library."
"And I have taken Dumbledore's private library. It is somewhere in those bags of goodies I have stolen during summer."
"Should I start looking for it?" Hermione asked him.
"Not now. I have some free time and I should know which bags are from Hogwarts. I will go through them, maybe I find something interesting."
"Before you go I want to ask you about something."
"What is it?"
"Well... I do not mind being CEO of your company, ten percent of shares and salary are nice but there is one thing... Hermione Granger is still a person of interest in the Magical World, while they do ignore mundane side of things it still leaves a chance that someone will notice that I work here..."
"Crap, I have forgotten about this." He said. "Do you have any idea? Of course you do, you wouldn't bring this up if you didn't have one."
"Well, I was thinking about using your own fake story, no one would ask many questions if you brought someone from your 'past' to lead your new company." Hermione explained.
"Good idea, Andromeda will create a fake identity for you. You are aware that it would mean no college education? Too much risk faking those."
"I am aware of that. I was hoping to get that as Hermione Granger after we catch up with our mundane education."
"Fine by me. Do you have a name for your alter ego? We will need a new door emblem."
"Danielle Watson. After my father and Doctor Watson from the Sherlock Holmes novels."
"I will contact Andromeda. She should have enough information before we start recruiting people." Harry said and started walking towards the elevator.
"By 'we' you mean 'me', right?" Hemione shouted after him.
"Sorry, can't hear you." Harry shouted while walking away.
"Damn him. Maybe that carrier wasn't a bad idea? I could always become a pirate. Hermione Granger, Captain Hermione Granger. Avast ye scurvy dogs!" Hermione conjured a leather tricorne and a cutlass, then went back into her office humming a song from a pirate movie she saw as a kid.
As Hermione was considering her career as a notorious pirate Harry was going through several bags of goods he got from Hogwarts. He skipped the bags with books from the library going for contents of the Headmaster's office and his private suite. Rather than take out one thing at a time like Hermione would do, he simply removed all the furniture and dumped contents of the bags in the middle of the living room. Several hours later when Hermione and Luna went back they saw Harry sitting on the floor and reading a large leather coated notebook, next to him was a large pile of various magical items and books. Hermione recognized many of those items from the Headmaster's office.
"I am not cleaning this." Announced Hermione right after entering.
"Spoilsport. What am I supposed to do with this cute maid outfit? No offense Harry, but you wouldn't look good in it." Said Luna, she then started searching the pile for something interesting.
"None taken. Did you know that Weasleys followed Dumbledore because he had blackmail material on them? He had stuff on more than half of the Boards of Governors, Fudge, Umbridge, Amelia Bones, Scrimgeour and many others that I barely know. The best thing, or worst depending on how you look at it, is that this stuff comes from the Dorea Potter nee Black, my Grandmother. Dumbledore killed her and my grandfather to get that information and blamed Deatheaters for the deed. Pity we can't use any of it." Harry closed the notebook as he said that.
"What about the Horcxuxes?" Asked Hermione.
"Nothing. Either Dumbledore destroyed that book or he kept it somewhere else." Harry answered and took something from the pile. "Sorry for the lack of a proper box, but here is your late birthday gift Hermione." Harry has handed Hermione a hourglass on a chain.
"Isn't it a Time Turner?" Luna looked at the gift.
"Probably the one I used in my third year, I doubt that Dumbledore actually asked anyone from DoM to borrow one for me." Hermione said while looking at it. "Thank you Harry, you know that best way to please a girl is by giving her a stolen and highly illegal magical item."
"Do you know what it means?" Luna said with excitement and started jumping.
"Uh? No? Besides giving us some free time to study?" Answered Hermione with a puzzled look on her face.
"No you silly, it means we can have more FUN! Imagine two Hermiones or two me having fun! I have to buy more outfits." Luna started listing the new outfits she would need.
"Wait Luna, you can't meet yourself when you use a Time Turners, Professor McGonagall told me that bad things happen if you do." Hermione interrupted her musing.
"Oh don't be silly. It's because many wizards are surprised, if someone looking like you entered the room you would assume it is some sort of an imposter and act accordingly. The school I went to used Time Turners every day to give us more free time, I have met my time clone many times and nothing bad ever happened, right Luna?" Luna turned around toward the door where another Luna stood.
"Right Luna. Come Hermione, we have to explore new possibilities this new toy gives us." The second Luna grabbed Hermione and started to lee with the first Luna trailing behind.
"Harry, aren't you going to tell them anything?" Shouted Hermione while being dragged away.
"Sure, have fun you three." Harry told them and grabbed another book from the pile.
"Us four you mean, the Time Turner still has some hours available and second Hermione can't wait to meet herself." The second Luna said.
White Industries HQ, London
"Harry, come to bed. Nothing interesting is going to happen." Luna tried to get his attention while he was watching Dumbledore through cameras. "It's not that Dumbledore will have a meeting with his top lieutenants where he will discuss all his evil plans."
"Fine, it's late anyway." Harry agreed and left the monitor.
15 minutes later
New Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
"I open this meeting with top lieutenants where we will discuss our evil plans. I propose to name our organization, maybe Council of Evil?" Many groans were heard.
"Kingsley, you do that every time we meet and every time we refuse." Lucius Malfoy said with an annoyed tone.
"Come on, we need a name. Every time I have to recruit someone in the Ministry to do something for us I have to came up with something, now I can use Order of The Phoenix as we have a Dark Lord around, but when he is removed I will again not be able to came up with a good organization name for agents."
"Kingsley, we don't need agents. We need minions, Order of The Phoenix is good enough banner to gather those so no, we won't choose such a cliché name." Kingsley's idea was shot down by Augusta Longbottom. "Why are you allowing him to go along with that anyway, Dumbledore?"
"It's amusing Augusta. I like the names Kingsley proposes. Now, let's get down to business. Kingsley?"
"The new batch of recruits have no muggleborns and only two half bloods among them, the rest are purebloods. Thanks to our brilliant potion professor no muggleborns graduated this year with scores allowing them to join." Several people were applauding him.
"The new Light sided faction is now taking shape. Due to my constant questioning of Albus policies I will be able to obtain an important position in the new faction. I will try to avoid becoming a leader, if asked I will cite my age as a reason to refuse."
"That's good to hear. How about the Dark side Lucius?"
"Nothing important is going on. My colleagues are happy about muggleborns no longer attending Hogwarts and due to our financial troubles many are looking up to me as I had enough assets outside Gringotts to survive without decreasing my spending. The only unknown is White, I tried to lure him into Dark camp but he didn't wish to commit himself."
"He is only one man Lucious, what he could do? Even with Potter vote he is no match for us."
"That is correct Augusta, but he could try to create his own faction."
"Impossible, the neutrals are incapable of working in a team and both Light and Dark sides won't suddenly side with a new camp."
Several other people joined the argument.
"Please, don't argue. Lord White is minor player in the Wizengamot, if he stays neutral he won't have an ability to pass any laws, to do that he has to join one of the major camps, both are controlled by us. Minevra, what about new students?"
"I am afraid we had a major mishap. One of the muggleborns appeared to be a half blood thus eligible to attend Hogwarts after the new law was passed. Unfortunately she has left after barely a week, she didn't take any possessions with her. Her absence wasn't noticed until next week, as far as I know she has left the day Severus had one of his 'accidents'. Albus, you have probably missed a student when you obliviated the class."
"That is bad. Were you able to bring her back?"
"No, when I arrived the house was empty. From the neighbors I have learned that occupants quickly packed and left several days earlier. From the Ministry I have learned that both her parents were actually magical so it's not the case of a fake squib ancestor."
"How much damage she could do to our plans?" Dumbledore asked.
"Almost none, no one would believe her."
"Then there is no point in pursuing her any longer, Severus what about our elusive Miss Granger?"
"Two perfect potions I brewed to localize her have failed, third one was perfectly brewed by an independent potion master and still failed to provide any information about her location. I am afraid that she is hiding under very powerful set of wards, something better than the cheap Fidelius."
"That's... unfortunate. Without Miss Granger we cannot pursue any of our plans."
"Headmaster... I believe we can fix that problem."
"What are you proposing Severus?"
"We could pull off a Crouch and use the Polijuice to impersonate Miss Granger, we have enough of her blood for more than hundred doses."
"That's still only a hundred hours, Severus." Malfoy pointed out.
"No if we add the blood to the potion right after brewing. This way a single drop of blood could be used to give us about twenty hours, more if I brew much larger batch. The largest cauldrons could be used to brew a batch lasting for over three hundred hours."
"That could work in the short run, but it could still be detected and after Crouch incident some people would notice Miss Granger drinking from a personal container."
"I do not plan to have our imposter work with the Ministry, I propose we have our imposter work with Lord Nabilius. We could hire some mercenaries and have 'Miss Granger' lead them in Lord Nabilius name. This way we destroy her credibility and force her to either return or to hide permanently allowing us to use her face with impunity."
'Hmm... yes, with the New Chosen One working with the Dark Lord she was destined to defeat. I can see people loosing hope and asking me for help. Do you have a specific target in mind Severus?"
"Hogsmeade Weekend in December, I will have enough time to brew the potion and the attack before Christmas will have much better effect."
"Very good, Kinsley could you send most troublesome muggleborn Aurors to protect the children that day? Good, we can have our Miss Granger kill the Aurors, this way we not only establish her working with Lord Nabilius, we also remove unwanted elements from the Auror force. Is there anything else?"
"What about Nerv?" Kinsgley asked.
"No, Kingsley. This name is even worse, what's next? Soul? Head?" This time McGonagall criticized him.
"Nerv? What does it stand for?" Asked Malfoy.
"Don't be silly Lucius, Nerv doesn't stand for anything." Kingsley answered him.
"Stop that Kingsley and Lucius, do not encourage him."
White Industries HQ, London
"And that's what happened when we were having fun." Harry told as he turned off the recording.
'We we only have sound?" Luna asked.
"Some sort of privacy ward, Dumbledore probably figured out that having everyone see the meeting of his Council of Evil is not a very good idea."
"Gee, common sense, who could have expected that?" Luna muttered.
"Not much of it if he had the meeting where we could listen to him." Hermione pointed out.
"Please do not complain that our opponent is an idiot. While facing someone competent would be more interesting and satisfying, it would also be much more dangerous and troublesome. I like my Dark Lords to be simple guys, easy to deal with. But that's not everything, that's the part after Kingsley, Malfoy and Augusta left."
New Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
"Now, what do we do about our mysterious assassin?" McGonagall asked the two remaining men.
"I still think it's Potter. I even suspect he is actually the elusive Lord White."
"That is possible Severus, I might have to confront Lord White about this. Harry knew about Horcruxes, if he is now working against us he will notice that Severus survived two successful assassination attempts and will start searching for his Horcrux. He might still not know that we all had them made."
"Let's hope he concentrate on Severus then, I only have two and do not wish to loose any of them." Hermione almost shouted after hearing McGonagall say that.
"What are you planning to do Headmaster?"
"I think that a direct confrontation will serve the best, a confrontation in front of the Wizengamot. I will try to lure Lord White into swearing a magical oath to either prove or disprove that he is Harry Potter."
White Industries HQ, London
"That's it. What do we do now?"
"That fucking bitch! She refused to give me a full access to the Restricted Section citing dangers of the Dark Magic and yet she has split her own soul using the darkest magic I heard about!" Hermione literally exploded. The following obscenities could make a sailor blush.
Harry on the other hand tried to calm himself and when Hermione finally stopped he calmed himself and said with the most serious tone he could muster.
"Hermione, language." Hermione looked at Harry.
"You... you... you waited seven years to tell me that." That was Harry's limit, he first started giggling then moved to a full blown laughter.
"I didn't know you could swear that well Hermione." Luna laughed.
"I... uhm... I don't have an excuse." Hermione slightly blushed and started laughing herself.
"Hermione, by now you ought to know that in the Magical World hypocrite and Light Wizards mean exactly the same." Luna pointed out when they all calmed. "Pity Quibbler was closed, the article about Dumbledore using the Inferi as teachers at Hogwarts would be an instant hit."
"Luna, you are a genius." Harry shouted and gave her a long passionate kiss.
Some author notes.
The 'carrier' reference comes from chapter 2 where I made some spelling mistakes, rather than fix and forget I decided to go along with the 'joke' and edited that scene in Chapter 2.
While someone might complain how fast Hermione recovered I will only point out that wizards are immune to the PTSD (Harry doesn't know that), the Cannon supports that theory as well... just look at all those death defying things they do in all those books, yet as far as I remember no therapy is ever mentioned.
The Horcruxes are quite amusing in fanfictions, in some every second person knows about them, I am waiting for some parody where Tom for the Leaky Cauldron mentions casually 'oh, you mean like Horcruxes? You know, the stuff where every second Dark Lord keeps part of his soul so he doesn't die?'. In some Bill knows about the because 'ancient Egyptians used them', if so then why there are no ancient Egyptian Dark Lords running around? The Horcrux run out of batteries or something? In my story Horcruxes were developed by Dumbledore and Grindevald, Dumbledore kept Grinevald alive because he couldn't find his Horcrux. The one thing that Horcrux doesn't protect from is natural death from old age, hence the imprisonment of Grinevald. Riddle was set up from the start, the only failure was that Dumbledore wanted him to fight against pureblood supremacy.
Hermione and Harry studying won't turn them into some sort of super wizards capable of obliterating entire armies.