A/N: This was mostly written because I feel like crap right now, and I had to vent out my feelings somewhere. This will be very angsty and dramatic and probably doesn't make any sense. Forgive me for that.

Disclaimer: None of the content below is mine, except for the plot.


Donia was a brilliant actress. Over the years, she learned the art of pretending that certain things simply didn't matter to her. But on the inside, it looked oh so different.

I feel it everyday it's all the same
It brings me down but I'm the one to blame
I've tried everything to get away

She should've known. She should've known better than to trust Keenan's promises. I love you, he said. I want to be with you, he said. And where was he now? In the arms of his beloved Summer Queen.

It didn't hurt as much as Donia thought it would. Something in the back of her mind had whispered to her the entire time: He will leave. So it wasn't a big surprise when he actually did.

The only problem was: Donia couldn't let go.

So here I go again
Chasing you down again
Why do I do this?

Time passed by, days, weeks, months. The world kept on turning. It was clear that the summer monarchs rejoiced; beautiful flowers grew everywhere, the sky was constantly blue, the whole world seemed to come into bloom. The only one that secretly crumbled was Donia. Every morning she woke up with a dull ache in her heart. She didn't see the beauty, the life outside her window. In her mind, the sky was grey.

She tried everything to distract herself; working like a maniac, being the best queen the Winter Court had ever had. It worked, none of her faeries suspected a thing. They all thought their queen's heart had healed. But no matter how hard she tried, in little moments of weakness the face of the Summer King would flash before her eyes.

Over and over, over and over

I fall for you

Over and over, over and over

I try not to

In her dreams, he was hers and hers alone. Every night, she would relive the good memories they shared, the tender moments, hopeful words, only to wake up in a bed too cold, too big for her. Donia would remember the feeling of Keenan's warm arms around her, and icy tears would drip on the sheets. When she was alone, she gave in to the sadness.

When the day comes, Donia is the Winter Queen, strong and with a fitting pride. She uses her powers as an amour, she seems unbreakable, but it's just another pretty fa├žade. Donia has been broken long ago, by the very man she loves. She's just too strong to give up, but she fights a lost battle.

It feels like everyday stays the same
It's dragging me down and I can't pull away
So here I go again
Chasing you down again
Why do I do this?

It's foolish, she knows, but she clings to the tiniest of his movements. Seeing the Summer King and Queen together is devastating, but Donia hides it behind smiles and friendly words, she hides her pain so well that not even Keenan notices, and he's known her for centuries.

Maybe he didn't even know her that well at all.

Over and over, over and over

You make me fall for you

Over and over, over and over

You don't even try

Sometimes Keenan smiles at her, and even though Donia knows she shouldn't, she holds onto these little signs of affection like a drowning man on a piece of wood. She refuses to see the pity in his eyes, and instead fancies she sees love. When he thinks Aislinn isn't looking, Keenan becomes the man Donia fell in love with. Secretly touching her hand, quickly brushing a strand of hair out of her face, giving her a tender look. But why does he do it?

So many thoughts that I can't get out of my head

I try to live without you, every time I do I feel dead

He does have lingering affections for his former lover. She was the first woman he ever truly loved, and it hurts him to cause her misery. He pretends he doesn't, but he can see the pain hidden in Donia's gaze. Keenan didn't want to leave Donia; he had to. Maybe, he thinks, it'll be easier for her to forget about me when I pretend I don't care anymore. So he does, he brushes their relationship off as if it was nothing.

I know what's best for me

But I want you instead

I'll keep on wasting all my time

But sometimes, Keenan slips. He can't forget that the woman whose heart he is breaking now used to mean everything to him. He can't erase the fact that some of the happiest memories he has are about her. It's the best for his court that he is now with his queen; but secretly, he wants Donia. He always wanted her.

Still, he takes Aislinn's hand, turns and leaves.

Over and over, over and over
I fall for you
Over and over, over and over
I try not to
Over and over, over and over
You make me fall for you
Over and over, over and over
You don't even try to