Epilogue- Sarah

1997, Livid festival.
Me and Sarah my best friend
Stripy tights and fairy wings
Safe as safe can be…

We drank the gin we'd snuck in,
Danced to Ben Folds Five.
I turned around to Sarah
Couldn't see her anywhere.
Safe as safe can be…

Oh, Sarah. I didn't mean to let you down
But you left me on my own, Sarah!
Why didn't you scream?

I went to all the stages
And to the St John's stand.
The man said "You just missed her
Stay- maybe she'll come back again."
I sat and watched the crowds.

My father came at midnight
We searched 'til half-past four.
I was half hysterical!
My father wasn't sure
He called for the police…

Oh, Sarah. I didn't mean to let you down
But you left me on my own, Sarah!
Why didn't you scream? Why didn't you shout?
Sarah, I hate it that I let you down!
But you left me on my own, Sarah!
Why didn't you scream? Why didn't you shout?
Why didn't you shout?

The next day the sergeant
Found her blue dress in the creek.
Her parents were so angry
They put the blame on me.

Then a fortnight later
Sarah knocked upon their door.
Her mother asked her "Where've you been?"
And she said
"I don't know, I don't know. I'm not sure
I'm not sure, I can't remember anything at all!"

Oh, Sarah. I didn't mean to let you down
But you left me on my own, Sarah!
Why didn't you scream? Why didn't you shout?
Sarah, I hate it that I let you down!
But you left me on my own, Sarah!
Why didn't you scream? Why didn't you shout?
Why didn't you shout?

Only a select few knew who the song was really about. Both Tori and I wanted to keep our private life, well, private. We loved our fans, don't get me wrong, but there's a difference between telling them a sad story and revealing something that personal, that painful.

I'd started writing it as the event unfolded, jotting down my thoughts as I usually did with everything else. Then years later when I was boxing up my things to move into our new apartment, I found them again. Tori had been surprised and the words had brought back bad memories, but she was mostly past the experience and enjoyed my musings. It had taken her a long time to recover. None of us really understood what had caused her to go into shock like that, I doubted we ever would. Yet over time, with much more patience and support than I knew I had in me, she began to heal. She was never the same bubbly girl she had been before, but she was happy again.

Once our careers hit a certain point, we felt secure enough to begin to settle into our lives and allowed time to just be happy with each other. It would never be easy, show business doesn't work that way, but we were earning enough to take the time off to write music that truly meant something to us. That was when we were able to sit down and fine tune Sarah. We both poured our heart and soul into the lyrics and sang it together. It was our song, not just mine and not just about her. It expressed the guilt I felt at the time and the guilt Tori felt later on. I knew she never blamed me for what happened, as I didn't hold her responsible. While we may never know what really happened, a part of both of us will always treasure that time because it brought us together.
After all, that's all we ever really wanted: each other.

The end.


Disclaimer: Victorious and it's characters do not belong to me. I claim no ownership of anything regarding the show or the characters. I claim no ownership of the song Sarah, which belongs to Kate Miller-Heidke. I do not own any lyrics in this story.


Author Note: If your not interested in the reading about the song and all the other stuff, feel free to skip this, all I ask is that you leave a review and let me know what you thought.

I know some of you will be sad that it ended it this way, but it was always going to be a short story and the ending feels right. I didn't want to drag it out just for the sake of prolonging the inevitable. Anyway, the song. This is a real song called Sarah. It's by Kate Miller-Heidke and you can probably find it on youtube or itunes. I highly suggest you listen to it, hopefully you'll be able to understand why I needed to write this after you hear it.

Done that? Good. Now, here's the interesting part: this story is based on a true story. This is what Kate says: "This story happened to a friend of mine, one of my best friends from high school, and the story's told from her point of view. It is nearly all real details—I've used some literary licence—but it's mostly real. In Grade 9, her friend went missing at a music festival and two weeks later, just turned up at her parents' house with no memory of where she had been. My friend was never allowed to see her again, because everybody blamed her. To this day, my friend doesn't know what happened, because her parents broke off contact. My friend and I had a sleepover in Grade 10, and she told this story to me over several hours while we were lying in our beds with our lights off. I've never forgotten it. It was a story that has always haunted me."
I don't know who this is about, but it is set in Australia. The song is so chilling and beautiful...
The lyrics throughout the rest of the fic, however, are mine- to an extent. I decided to change them slightly, rather than confusing things with describing what was already in the song, so that it was more like Jade would be writing down her feelings in a diary, later getting together with Tori and creating the song out of it.

So I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. I have to say though, I absolutely love your reviews. Each one means a lot to me and seeing your reactions as I updated it... it made me weep with joy. I hope people keep reviewing now this is finished as I can address questions and concerns (and errors).
Thanks!