I'm not continuing this story, but I thought it might be fun to flip the perspectives. Hope you enjoy.
The Walking Dead isn't mine.
Fuck. Hadn't even been talking or nothin'. Just standing there, but he could do that with Carol. Felt comfortable around her. Then she touched his arm, as if to get his attention, but when he turned she was right there, in his space. And then her mouth was on his.
And he fucking froze like a little school girl. Couldn't breathe. Could be it was a heart attack. God damned thing was like to burst out of his chest. Didn't take but a moment and she backed off. He let out a painful breath and willed his heart to calm the fuck down.
He couldn't look at her. He wished his heart would fucking stop beating so he wouldn't have to ever look at her again. Fuckin' pussy. Carol was the best part of this world and he knew it. Felt it. He brought his lip in between his teeth and tried to taste her.
"I'm sorry." She whispered.
Course she was. Christ, what was she thinking? Was it a joke? Slumming it in the apocalypse? He didn't want to believe that. Didn't really believe she would laugh at him, even as he braced himself for it. His chest got tight again as anxiety battled against hope. She was turning to leave.
"Why?" He asked. He had to know. Had to keep her there. She stopped. Hesitated for a moment.
"Does it matter?" She asked. Her voice sounded funny. "Don't worry, I won't do it again." Daryl's heart dropped to his stomach. She turned back and smiled at him. Shrugged. As if it wasn't a big deal. But her smile didn't meet her eyes and he was struck by the loss. He knew then he'd fucked up royally.
His thumb came to his mouth automatically and he chewed on his nail. He was confused and it was just dawning on him that he might have had this wrong for awhile now.
"I thought you was joking. About fooling around."
He thought back to all the teasing he'd let her get away with. She'd made him blush more than once. He'd done things with women he'd never admit to out loud, but Carol embarrassed him with shocking ease. It never once crossed his mind that she might have been serious.
The thought made him somewhat uncomfortable. He'd held on to this tender feeling he had for Carol. Kept it as something just for himself. Most things in his life had turned ugly in some way or another, so he felt very protective of this thing between them. Didn't want to spoil it. Certainly couldn't imagine putting his dirty hands on her.
Well, that wasn't the complete truth. He'd awakened from more than one dream that forced him out into the pre-dawn morning. It was jerk off or kill something and at least if he hunted they all ate. Hunting was a good distraction. Hell, walkers were an excellent distraction. Didn't have time to be worrying about wanting something he couldn't have. Something he didn't deserve. Carol had been through enough and didn't need some greasy redneck trying to get into her pants. So he worked hard to crush those thoughts.
And now she had kissed him. And he had to admit to himself that it all came down to him being a coward. Because he didn't know what to do with this tender feeling. Felt awkward as fuck around her. Because for the first time in his life he cared.
"Sorry." She said again. "I guess the loneliness got to me."
"Lonely?" He asked. He could understand that. Felt it often in his life. But he thought they had an understanding. They were in this together.
"Yes, lonely, Daryl." She said, suddenly sounding annoyed. "I'm alone in the group. I'm not like you. I need human contact. I need to be comforted. I need to feel..." She stopped for a moment. "Maybe lonely was the wrong word. Maybe I should have said horny. Would you understand that?"
Daryl took a step back from her and tried to control his sudden anger. The hurt. She still thought she was alone? And here he was like a fuckin' sap trying to get a hold of his feelings and she's just horny. Was he just convenient? Was he that guy? Merle would fuckin' laugh his ass off. Christ, make no wonder she was sorry. She was looking to screw and he couldn't manage a kiss. She'd have to go looking elsewhere. His head pounded at the thought.
"If you wanted a fuck you could have just said." He spat.
"And how would that work? Since my kiss nearly sent you running?" Carol asked. It was a fair question. Maybe if she had fuckin' warned him. Given him a chance to get a hold of himself. Christ. And he hadn't fuckin' moved, so what the hell was she talking about?
"I ain't running no where. You're the one trying to get away from me." He accused.
"I'm mortified." She declared. "I thought maybe I'd save us both further embarrassment by getting out of your way."
Daryl felt his anger subside and knew this had been his fault. She was just trying to find some way to live in this dead world. It wasn't her fault that he didn't know how to be with someone like that. Wasn't her fault that he was scared.
"I know I ain't any good at that stuff." Daryl said, ducking his head. "But I don't want you to be sorry." Hated that she was sorry for kissing him. He'd just fucked up the single best moment of his life.
Carol seemed to relax a bit. "I said I was sorry because it was clear to me that you didn't want to be kissed. I shouldn't have pushed myself on you like that."
Daryl grabbed an arrow just to have something to do with his hands. He needed to fix this. If he was ever going to look at her again, he needed to clear it up now.
"Got no problem fucking. But I know you. We're, well... I don't know how to do the softer stuff." He felt himself flush and continued to focus on the arrow. Had she heard him? Did she understand?
"That's okay. Let's just forget it. No harm done."
Like that was going to happen. She stepped away from the rail then and moved to leave. He wasn't ready. Without thinking his hand shot out and grabbed her arm. His fingers circled her wrist easily. She turned and looked at him. Her face was open. She had no expectations.
"Don't want to forget it." He managed to get out. He held his breath and waited to see what she would do. After a moment she wriggled her arm within his grasp so that he was now holding her hand. She squeezed his hand tightly. He returned the gesture. It seemed to be what she was looking for.
"Maybe I could give it another try?" Carol suggested.
Relief flooded him. Not wanting to screw up again, he stepped up to her immediately, bending down to meet her lips with his.