Christmas in Heaven

Allen looked out the window, watching the soft white snow falling from the sky. He didn't really want to go out in that but he has so much to do before he could rest for the day. So without any farther ado he put on his black winter hat followed by a knitted blue scarf and his black jacket. After buttoning it up to his chin he grabbed his keys and headed for the door. There he shoved his feet into over worn boots and left the too quiet apartment that now only reminded him of what he had and could never get back. Yuu Kanda had once been his enemy but some how over the years it had turned into something more akin to friendship. Soon friendship had turned into love. A small smile tugged at Allen's lips as he remembered how their relationship had come to be.

Allen and Kanda had been dancing around each other for quite some time. Neither wanting to ruin their friendship, neither brave enough to admit it first. That was until a senior in college; Tyki Mikk had come up to Allen and asked him for a date in front of Kanda.

"Oi, Shonen!" Tyki had called as he ran up to the white haired teen. "Want to come on a date with me this Saturday?" Allen stared at him for a long time, not even knowing how to respond. Kanda had decided to save him the trouble however.

"He can't" Kanda had growled out, gripping tight to the kendo sword he had just been practicing with.

"Oh?" Tyki smirked. "And why can't he?" Kanda's face had gone a brilliant shade of red and Allen was once again stunned.

"Be- because! He has a date with me!" the blue haired samurai looking teen had shouted before grabbing Allen's wrist and dragging him off, leaving a stunned Tyki in their wake.

Once Allen had regained his senses he demanded to know what that had been about.

"Ah well… that Tyki guy is bad news," Kanda said rather lamely. Allen who was upset at the reason exploded.

"Oi, I think that's for me to decide! I can date who I want!" Allen had yelled before turning to walk away, only to be stopped once again by Kanda who spun him around and silenced and protest with a kiss.

Allen's eyes went wide, unsure what to do. Kanda knew a little more however and he rested his hands on the white haired teen's hips and coaxed him into a slow loving kiss that spoke more then their words could ever manage to. Kanda's kiss had spoken of love and passion and undying loyalty to Allen that seemed to never waver and all Allen could do was respond with the same.

Allen smiled at the memory; Kanda had always been the type to let his actions speak louder then his words. Shaking himself out of his thoughts, Allen took a look around at the streets around him. The side walks were shoved but still coated with snow, the Christmas lights hung from every teen and lamp post. Just as he passed 3rd and main he saw a small manger scene. Allen knew he had passed it hundreds of times but now that he looked at it he wondered if Kanda was there.

"Are you there, kneeing with Sheppard's before him, Kanda?" he wondered aloud in a soft whisper that was carried off by the wind. Allen pulled his scarf tighter as he pushed back the wave of emotion as he turned and continued on his way. All these decorations made him think of his first time he had been invited to spend Christmas with the man that would soon come to rule his every thought.

"I'm being forced to listen to Tidol singing Christmas songs with Daisya and Marie," Kanda complained to Allen for what seemed like the 50th time.

"That sounds nice," Allen said absent mindedly.

"Oh yea? Well what are you doing for Christmas then bean sprout," Kanda asked defensively.

"Nothing," Allen told him truthfully. "Cross will be going out to the bar to rack up more debt and I'll be at home, alone or maybe he'll drag me with him so I can play cards and win him some easy money."

"That… that sounds like a dumb way to spend the holiday! And if you just going to do something dumb like that you might as well come over to my place and suffer with me," Kanda told him all at once. Allen wasn't sure what to make of it, no one had ever invited him to spend Christmas with them. Allen knew better to question it, Kanda just might take the invitation back so he just smiles.

"Alright," he told the older boy. "I'll be there."

\"G-Good! I'll get you at noon or better yet just spend the night Christmas eve," Kanda all but demanded. Blushing lightly and blaming it on the cold, Allen nodded.

That Christmas had been the best in his life and he would treasure it, just like all the ones that followed.

The memories nearly brought tears to his eyes even as he tried to tell himself it was just the harsh wind stinging his eyes. He brushed it off as he did every time and continued on his way, stopping at a small flower shop to buy some roses. Roses, even they bought fourth more of Allen's treasured memories of Kanda. Allen had known to never mistake the man for a romantic but when he had shown up on Allen's birthday the following year with a dozen of them in his arms, Allen couldn't help but wonder if there was a romantic bone in his body after all.

Cross has yelled from bedroom for Allen to get the damn door, he had stumbled in drunk, early that morning and didn't feel like dealing with guests. He hadn't so much as muttered a happy birthday or a Merry Christmas. Allen wasn't sure when his real birthday had been but Christmas was the day Mana, his guardian before Cross, had found him on the streets, from then on he decided that it would be Allen's birthday. Not many people knew when his birthday was, he didn't feel the need to tell anyone.

Upon opening the door Allen was surprised to see Kanda there; he had told the older boy that he wouldn't be able to go over for Christmas since he was grounded. What was more surprising were the deep red roses he held.

"Kanda?" Allen asked confused.

"Happy Birthday Bean sprout," Kanda said with a slight blush before shoving the roses into Allen's arms.

"B-but I never told you-"

"I asked Lenalee," Kanda confessed. "He brother Komui is in charge of filing all the student records." Allen was touched that Kanda would go through so much trouble to fine out his birthday. Looking at the roses he smiled before he noticed something, eleven were indeed real roses but one was fake.

"Hey this one's fake…" Allen said, confused. A blush even brighter then before overcame Kanda's face.

"T-that's right," Kanda said.

"But why?" Allen was curious.

"Because bean sprout, I'll love you till the last rose dies," the older boy told him in embarrassment. Before Kanda could think Allen was in his arms, kissing him.

"If you brats are gonna get mushy then leave!" barked Crossed from his room.

Kanda and Allen had high tailed it out of there as fast as they could, laughing at the redheads misery. Allen had thought it served him right before being so hung over.

Looking up Allen's thought sobered. He knew this was his destination from the moment he had woken up but it didn't mean he was ready to face it just yet. With a heavy breath Allen reached a hand out and pushed the rusty gate open and walked the snow covered path to a spot just over the hill that he had come to know well in the past year. A gleaming slab of marble engraved with a beautiful lotus flower just below his beloved name, Yuu Kanda. It was only then, in front of the cold marble head stone that he finally his tears loose, not caring as they turned to frost in the winters air. Laying down the roses gently eleven real and one fake, just like the ones Kanda had given him all those years ago. Allen took a step back to look at his lover's grave with a sad smile.

"I wish you were here…" Allen confessed, "And I wonder what Christmas in Heaven is like…"