Day One:

Pam just called and told me the news. Eric was no longer my husband. Apparently last night the love of my life, married Fredya because of the stupid contract his maker made. She said he was unable to avoid the contract any longer. I stutter in shock "NO, NO, NO" over and over. I suddenly fall to the ground completely consumed with my grief. I don't know how long I was laying on the floor in my state of despair. It felt like hours or it could have been years. I had absolutely no concept of time what so ever. I was completely oblivious to the world around me.

I should have told him I loved him. I should have lived with him as his wife. I shouldn't have blamed him and punished him for Bill's sins against me. My sweet, strong Viking. I will never be able to tell him how much I love him or touch him or make passionate love to him again. A never-ending coldness seeps and settles into my heart and spreads through my entire soul. How will I go on without him?

I am pulled out of my mental meanderings by a knocking on my front door.

I get myself up and with an unknown source of energy and go to the front door. Upon opening it I find Bill standing on my front porch. I see him and start crying hysterically. I fall into his arms and he carries me to the couch. He slowly rocks me back and forth, attempting to offer me some comfort.

"You know Sookah, I always told you this would happen. Eric is not good for you. He is a viscous and conniving bastard. I always said he would use you and leave you. Why didn't you believe me? Doesn't matter now. I love you, you are mine and will always be mine." I stop crying hearing his words and look up at him, in shock at his words. An unknown and all consuming anger invades me. I instantaneously jump up out of his lap.

"Did you come over just to gloat and rub in my face that my husband has left me to married another! You think that now Eric is out of your way, I am free to be yours again! I am not yours William T Compton! And I never will be again! Eric was not the reason that kept me from being with you, you are the reason. You are a lieing, cheating, conniving bastard! Not Eric! You! The only reason I was ever with you to begin with, was because of all the blood you forced down my throat, when you had me beating to within an inch of my life! Our whole relationship was built on nothing but a bed of lies! Then you took advantage of my grief over my Grandmother death, to take my virginity! I was not even interested in you, in a romantic way before having your blood! Then you leave me, cheat on me and then for the cherry on top you raped me! After I saved your useless Ass! And you have the nerve to bad mouth Eric! He was good to me and truly loved me, unlike you! He was the love of my life. You can never replace him! You get out of my house this instant and never come back! I resend you invitation!"

"Sookah! You need me! Felipe will becoming for you now that you are finally free of Eric's grasp. You need me to protect you! You need to be mine! We need to bond and marry by the knife."

"Marry you! Marry You! Of all the nerve! I will never marry another! And even if I was entertaining the idea, it would certainly never be to you! Eric is it for me. He is the love of my life. Even if we are no longer married, I will not be in a relationship with an one else! We are over Bill. Get that through your thick head! I am not yours and I will never be yours! And I am never going to be Felipes! I would rather die first!" I slam the door, in his shocked face.

I take myself to bed and cry myself to sleep.

Day Two:

I wake up and drag myself out of bed to get some water. I feel rather dehydrated after all that crying. After downing 3 cups of water , I go back to bed and lay down. I don't have the energy to do anything more than lay there.

A few hours later there is a knock at the door. I get up to answer it.

It is Mr C.

"Hello Child."

"Hello Mr C. Not that I am unhappy to see you, but what do I owe this visit to? No offense, but I am not really in the mood for company today." I say as I lead him to the kitchen table. He places his brief case upon it and starts pulling out papers.

"No offense taken child, I am well aware of your troubles. I am here because I have some paper work for you to sign. The Viking was unable to contact you, so he contacted me instead. He signed over most of his money, all of his company's and financial holdings to you my dear. He did not want to leave you at all and thought this might help you some. Plus he did not want his furture wife that he was being forced to marry, to benefit in any way from his resources. He wants to make his part in this new marriage as unuseful and unbeneficial to her as possible."

"Why is he leaving it all to me and not Pam?" I say completely confused.

"If he gave the money to Pam, it would be seen as hiding his assets from the marriage. Vampire courts could order the money back to him. Or Fredya could command him, as his Queen and wife to use a makers command to order Pam to return the funds. But as a divorce settlement, she has no rights to money and has no legal standing to reclaim it. She should be finding out tonight when she rises, if she has not found out already. She is now married to the poorest vampire in the world. Well besides a new-born vampire. You are now a very rich woman, indeed."

I sit there in shock, taking it all in. I was a rich woman. But at what cost. I have to go on without my Viking, for at least One hundred years. I'll be dead and gone by then. Unless of course Fredya meets an untimely death.

Mr C starts passing packets of papers for me to sign and hands me a check book and debit cards. He starts going over some of the business Eric owns. Or as I should now say, I own. But I really do not hear what he is saying. I just nod and sign where ever he tells me to, not really hearing or seeing what he is saying. Its a good thing I trust Mr C with my life.

This was Eric's last gift to me. His wealth. I am sure he angered his new wife by doing this, possibly putting himself in danger or setting himself up for punishment.

Mr C. looks me in the eyes and lightly pats my hand. "It will work out somehow dear. As you know Vampires cannot enter your house unless you invite them. I would uninvite any that have a standing invite to you home, for your own safety." I nod. Felipe could order any vampires in his revenue, with a known invite to my house, to kidnap me.

"I resend the invitation of all vampires from my home."

"Don't worry child, I trust you will find your way. But a word of advice. Be wary of other Supernaturals. Now that you are no longer attached to the Viking, you no longer have his protection. I have heard rumblings in the Were community about the Were and the Shifter's plans. They plan to try to impregnate you, to trap you into a relationship with them. The Were wants telepathic children that can shift into a were added to their pack. The shifter just desires to keep you at his side for himself."

"Sam and Alcide? Are you sure?"

"Yes my child, I am afraid so...The Fairies have plans as well. That was why Fintain hid you from Niall for so many years. You see, the Fae are a dying race. All Female fairies are required to produce as many Fae children as possible. Since you having the spark and a natural immunity to Lemon and Iron, I am sure it is even more so for you. I have heard of Niall receiving many requests for your breeding services. But the Viking denied his requests, since you were his. This is something you really need to think about. You need to think about wheither or not you really want to risk bring children into this world. It is strongly possible that if you mate with other Supernaturals, that your children they will have the spark and Telepathy. Supernaturals may try to force this upon you, through physical means or through magic. If you allow it to happen, your Childrens lifes would always be in danger. All know of you abilities and would naturally suspect any child you would have, would share your gifts as well."

"Are you saying they will go as far as to rape me to produce children."

"Yes my dear. Supernatural are different from humans and don't look upon it in the same way as you do. Most only consider the results and not the cost of getting results. If you decide that you do not want children you should look into getting your tubes tied or getting your ovaries remove. It could save you much worry, danger and heartache. I think Felipe is planning to breed you as well. He wishes to raise an army of telepaths for his kingdom. By getting you tubes tied, you would remove one of the reasons many are after you."

"I will take it under advisement. This is a big decision. I will have to think it over."

"If you decide to go with the surgeries, Dr Lugwig will be able to assist you. Here is her card. Do not forget you can now afford her services. This talisman will protect you from magic being cast upon you to increase your lust or make you fertile. Wear it at all times. I have just found out about the Fae that visited you at Christmas. He cast a lust spell upon you at Nail's request. Nail had hoped that the fairy would have been successful in impregnated you. He thought he could use the pregnancy to trick you into moving to fairy, to protect the child. Luckily it did not take."

"Wait a minute. A fairy? At Christmas time? No that was a Were! He said that he was running from a rival pack."

"He was not a were. He was a fairy Were hybrid with the ability to shift. He used that and some magic to fool you. Niall even hired actors to add to the scene to make it more believable."

"No. no. Niall raped me with Magic!"

"I am afraid so my Dear. This is why you must think on what I said. He was even willing to risk this plan, with you being under the Viking's protection. There is no telling what he would be willing to try now, you are left without protections. Fairies are not above using magic to get what they want."

I wonder if that was why Dermot and Claude were hanging around here. Hoping I would hit on them so they could impregnate me. I am struck speechless. I just sit there and process what I was just told.

"I now regret my gift to Fintain. If I could have forseen all the trouble and pain it would have caused, I would not have offered it. I am sorry for the trouble I have caused you my dear." I nod. As much as I would like to reassure him, I just don't have it in me right now.

"I must go. I am needed else where. Please think about what I said and keep yourself safe. I will be in touch if I hear anything further." He kisses me on my forehead as he leaves the room, seeing himself out.

I find myself wandering aimlessly around my house. Who else is in on this. Was Amelia in on it to? She was so excited about breaking the bond between Eric and I. Then she went running around telling everyone about it. Did she trade favors with someone for breaking our bond. Could she have been working with the local packs or my grandfather? Would she do that to me. I would say no, but after Trays death, which I think she still blames me for, there is no telling. I will have to be leery of her in the future.

I crawl into bed feeling totally lost. I wish Eric was here for me to talk all this over with.

Day 3:

I wake up and it is dark outside. I take in the state of my room. It is a complete and total mess. I get up and walk over to my dresser and stare at myself in the mirror. Even though I just had gotten a good 16 hours of sleep, there are large dark circles and bags under my eyes. My eyes look old, tired and lifeless. I had the eyes of someone who had lived lifetimes of pain and hurt. I sigh.

I need to think about what Mr C said. Are the Supernaturals left in my life planning to try to impregnate me. It seems like it could be true with Alcide. With him showing up at my house and in my bed, naked after hearing from Amelia that I had broken the bond. I bet his pack wants me to produce some Were Shamans for them. I could see Alcides second trying to convince him of the idea.

But what about Sam. I know he has had feelings for me for a long time. But would he try to trap me with a child. His child? I didn't think so before. But he has always been so angry about me being with vampires. Is it because vampires can't give me children? Is it because he thinks my life would not be complete without them? It could be that he thinks that, but I will have to listen in on him and see.

Then there is Felipe. If he thinks I am going to Nevada with him he has another thing coming. Being in sin city as a telepath would be a night mare. All those people so close together in such a small area. I would be forced to keep my shields up all the time. I would never get any rest. And if my shields failed, the amount of pain I would feel, from all those minds pushing in on me would be horrible. No I am not going to Nevada. Not to mention, that the marriage contract is his fault as well. As King he could have put an end to it, with a simple order. But no, he wanted me so he let the contract stand. I bet he even incouraged Fredya. He is responsible for destroying my life. I will not be going anywhere with that arrogant Spaniard.

Now Bill is sniffing around again, trying to force his way back into my life. I am sure that he is planning some way to put me in danger soon, so he can save me by forcing his blood down my throat. I can not allow that to happen.

I go to the drawer and pick up the cluviel dor. I rub my finger over in in circles. Just holding it calms me. There are a few different reasons why I have not yet used it.

For one thing it scares me. What if it is like Monkeys paw? In that story if you make a wish and it comes true. But in a very bad way. It's a classic story that teaches you to be careful of what you wish for.

I remember the story well. A strange man shows up at an olders couples home and gives them a magic monkeys paw. The paw grants 3 wishes. The man wishes for money, he wants to be rich. Then a little while later, another man comes to the door to inform them that their son was killed. He died in horrific accident at work in which he fell in to a machine and was crushed to death. The man then hands them a large check from his company life policy. Then devastated by their loss, they wish their son back to life. But forget to wish his body was repaired as well. He comes back, but as some kind of terrible half dead zombie in the night. They use the last wish to undo all that he wished for with the first two wishes.

I would have to be really careful what I wished for. I don't want an out come like in the Monkeys paw. I need to plan out my wish and think of all possible side effects and consequences.

Another reason I didn't use it to fix the contract, was that I wanted Eric to prove his love for me by finding a find a way out of it. Eric is really smart and crafty. He always finds a loop hole or a way around things. But this time he couldn't. I guess, I took his craftiness for granted. Plus my reluctance to use the wish to fix things upset and angered him. I think he was disappointed in me and doubted my love for him.

But what would I wish for exactly? Could I wish that Hadley never told the Queen about me. If I did that, then she would have never sent Bill to procure me. I would have never meet him. Which could be good in it self. It would save me alot of pain and heartache. But whos to say that some other vampire would not have found out about me in the future and they could have been much worse that Bill. I would have less knowledge and experience with Vampires to protect myself. But then again if it was not for Bill, my Gran would have not been murdered. But then Rene would still be wandering the streets killing women. Is Grans life worth so many other lifes. Is that my choice to make? Could I live with that and look at myself in the mirror each day, knowing a serial killer got away because I changed things? I dont' think so. I am not god, this is not up to me.

If I never meet Bill, I would not have been beaten by the Rattrays. The Rats would still be alive and so would my cat Tina. But would Eric and I still ended up together? Would we still have the same problems we have now anyway?

If I wished Bill away then I might not have, met Eric. Then I would not have been there to save Eric and Pam at the hotel in Rhodes. Not to mention all the other people I saved that day. I also might not have been there to save Eric from the Sigbert. Then Eric and Bill might not have been their to save me from the fairies. Besides who's to say what I would do with my life, if I never met any vampires. I might have done something dumb like settle for luke warm feels for Sam and had a bunch of kids, just because he is harder to read. Then all their lives would be in danger. So no, that is not a wish that is safe to make. To many chances for unforseen outcomes and things to go horribly wrong. Its better the past stays in the past where it belongs. Plus wishing Bill away would not fix all my problems. I would still have all these sups after me at some point or another. No that is not a wish I could make.

So what could I wish for? That the marriage contract was never made? Then Eric's maker would still be alive. He could show up at any time and use or hurt Eric. I am very glad that vampire is dead and his evil little vampire child too. No, even if it would be nice to wish it away, whoever set all this up, would just find another way to get Eric out of the the picture. They might even try to kill him. If they were sucessful, I would not be able to wish him back, if he met his final death. Since I would have already used my wish. So no, that would not be a good wish either.

So how do I fix this. How do I get Eric back with a wish without putting us in more danger?

I decide to think about it again after I eat. I always think better on a full stomach. I need to keep up my strength, if I hope to come up with a plan.

So I go to the kitchen and fix myself some breakfast. I start by brewing some coffee. While I am waiting for the coffee to finish, I cook some eggs and bacon. Once it is done, a get a cup of coffee and sit down to eat. When I am finished I clean up and put everything away.

Feeling slightly refreshed by eating. I decide to shower and dress for the day. If the news of Eric's marriage has gotten out I will be having unwanted visitors. I want to make sure I am dressed, so no one gets any ideas. So I shower and dress for the day.

Feeling I have myself in order, I collect a few sheets of paper and a pen and I head down to the kitchen table. It is taking all I have not to fall apart and give in to the coldness in my heart. At least I know this was not Eric's choice, but a contract that was forced upon him. If he did it of his own free will, I don't think I would have been able to go on.

I get a glass of ice tea and sit down. Time to brain storm again.

I could wish I was human. But if I did that, sups would still come after me. They most likly would not believe I was no longer a telepath and vampires would be able to glamore me. It would not help things. I guess in turn, wishing Eric was human is out for the same reasons. Every who has something against Eric would come after him and he would have no way to defend himself. Not to mention Queen Fredya would most likly kill him. She would find it disgraceful to be married to a human. No that is definitely not a good wish.

What else could I wish for. That there were no sups in the world? That would be a rather large wish, could the Cluiel dor even grant it? If it could, it still would not be a good idea, because fairies are from a different world. They would not be affected by the wish and could come here causing problems. Not to mention who knows how many other worlds have sups who come here as well. No that would leave the world open to attack. Not to mention it is not my place to make that choice for everyone on the planet. There are lots of sups out there that are perfectly happy being a sup. It is not my place to play god and make that choice for them.

What else could I wish for?... I could wish for someone to kill the Queen. But then that would still leave us open to attack. Plus would I even be allowed to leave the state to go to Eric. Would he become King if Fredya was dead. Or would someone else inherit the throne. It is my understanding that Eric is a royal consort, I don't believe that would put him next in line. Would Felipe allow me to leave and go to Eric? Or would he consider me his asset and keep me from going? Or would he kidnapping from Eric once I get there? After all the state of Ok. is not a large state and has a small vampire population. They would be no match for Felipe with 3 states worth of vampires and resources.

Since I have not come up with any solutions yet to my problem, I decide to think about what Mr C said.

Could getting my tubes tied, really keep me safe? Would it end the interest some Sups have in me? Do I ever want to consider having kids. It was once a dream of mine to have kids. But truthful the only person I would ever want to have kids with is Eric and he can't have kids. I could not even imagine having them with anyone else. I had thought at one point in time, of using the wish to wish Eric was fertile, so we could have kids together. But now I am glad that I didn't do that. Sups would always be after our kids, trying to use them for their gifts. They would be in constant danger form both my enemies and Eric's. No that is not an option. I could not knowingly put a child through that on purpose. What kind of mother would I be, to put my wants above their safty. To have kids on purpose knowing the danger and unhappiness they would face. No that is not a good idea either. Getting my tubes tied is the best option. Espeically since I don't plan to have kids anyway. It would break my heart to bring them into his world. But it would break my heart more to abort them, if someone raped me and I ended up pregnant. It is better I don't take the chance at all.

So I pick up Dr Lugwigs card and call the number. I schedule an appointment for the next day. Well that was fast and painless.

Feeling exhausted I go back to bed. Maybe I will have more ideas tomorrow.

Day 4:

I wake up and it is light out. I manged to sleep through the rest of the day and night. I am glad that Bill did not stop by again to bother me. I am not in the mood to deal with him and his bull shit. I have way to much on my mind.

Looking at the clock I see I have two hours to get ready, before I have to leave for my appointment with Dr lugwig. The appointment is at the Sup hospital I stayed at, after the fairy attack. I hope, I don't have flash backs. I still have nightmares sometimes of Tray's face as he is being stabbed and of Clancy meeting his final death for something he did not believe in. I see Claudine kitting little bootys for her babys and the blooding knitting needle. Then fairies always end up getting me and kill me in the end. I know they are gone. I saw it with my own two eyes, but my subconscious did not seem to get the message.

I quickly shower, get dresses and fix me something fast and easy to eat. Before I know it I am on my way to see Dr Lugwig.

I check in at the desk and they let her know I am here. I take a seat in the waiting room and look through the mags on the table. None of them really interest me. I really don't care who the vampire of the year is or how to win the vampire of my dreams. I only care about my vampire and only my vampire.

A moment later one of Dr Lugwigs nursey calls me back. She weights me and measures my height. Then she takes my blood pressure before taking me back to a room.

"The doctor will be with you in a moment."

Luckly I am in a different part of the hospital, from where I was last time. Nothing looks firmiler to me, for which I am thankful. I hear a knock on the door and Dr Lugwig enters.

"Miss Stackhouse." She says with a nod as she waddles in the room.

"Dr."

"I have spoken with your lawyer. He informs me that many sups are after you to produce children."

"Yes, that is what I have heard. I don't want to have children. Especially under circumstance such as those. What can be done to protect myself?"

"There are a few options. We could tie your tubes. This is quite effective in humans. But if the right fertility spell is cast on you, it could undo the surgery and cause you to get pregnant. It can also be reversed, which can be a benfit or a risk. But this would offer birth control and has minimal down time to recover, with few side effects."

"Option 2 is to remove your ovaries. This would work well because no amount of Fertility Magic could make them regrow. But this is a more invasive surgery and would require more recovery time. We could harvest and freeze the eggs from your ovaries, just in case you change your mind in the future about having kids. Or I could place a status spell on them and in the furture I could reattach them if you change your mind. But I would have to hide them, somewhere where others could not find them. One down side to this option is that you would have to be on hormone replacement therapy for the rest of your life. Their removal would cause you to go in to premature menopause. But at least you would be safe."

"Option 3 is to remove your uterus. Like the last option Fertility magic could not regrow your uterus. This is the most invasive of the options. But you could then keep your ovaries and not need hormone replacement therapy. However you would never be able to carry a child, if you change your mind in the future. You could still get pregnant, but it would be very rare and dangous, since it would be an etopic pregancy. We would have to abort the pregnancy to save your life. Since your other organs are not capable of supporting the growth of a baby."

"Normal birth control would not work, since you have to take it regularly. If someone kidnaps you for this purpose, you will not have access to your pills or shots. They would simply just wait for the birth control to wear off before impregnating you. IUD's are too easily removed to be a good option."

Wow that is a lot of information the doctor just told me.

"I will give you a few minutes to think your options over." She exits the room.

Ok. So normal birth control is not an option. Neither is IUD's. Tying my tubes sounds good, but we already know that someone used lust magic on me once. So using Fertility magic on me is not much of a jump. It is still a large risk. I would not put it past them to try again. So this is not an option for me. The next option is the one I like the best. I could have the Dr keep my overies in a status spell just in case I change my mind in the future. I really don't like the next option, because I would never want to abort a baby, even if my life was in danger. But I would if I had to. Why chance it though. Without ovaries there would be no chance at all of getting pregnant. Even if the down side is I have to take drugs for the rest of my life.

My decision made I want for the Doctor to return.