Gnat1: That's right, readers. The sequel to the well-received "A Super
Smashin' Christmas" is here! Similarily to SSC, this will contain a
lot of random humor, a trait I tend to be good at ever since I began
"Kid Icarus: Reign of Random". Therefore, I hope this won't
Hope you all had a great Easter Sunday!
Disclaimer: SSBB is sole property of Nintendo. All characters belong
to respected owners.
Easter Sunday was always a fine holiday for the Smashers. It came and
went peacefully on most of the years, but was always found enjoyable.
There was food, fellowship, pleasant talk, and overall an enjoyable
Well, good things never last too long.
Yes, this Easter was VERY different than the other ones. So different,
in fact, that even Captain Falcon knew something was off (and that's
saying something, 'cause the poor dude really ain't all that smart).
All the Smashers really wanted to do this Easter was relax, and who
could blame them? After endless tournaments and battles, they deserved
some resting up.
Of course, being the respectable people that they were, they made sure
to attend the Easter service at the local church. That went well,
until, of course, Kirby accidently swallowed the Pastor.
Heh, no worries, though, he made it out all right, but Kirby was then
asked to sit a safe distance away from everyone else.
All in all, Easter looked to be one of the few peaceful days for our Smashers.
...You seriously believed that?
No, here's how Easter Sunday REALLY went.
After arriving back at the mansion from the local church's Easter
service, our Smashers found themselves standing before Master Hand,
who insisted that he had a "Special Announcement".
"SMASHERS, THERE IS SOMETHING I MUST TELL YOU." Master Hand said as he
hovered above the group of fighters in the main hall. "ALL OF YOU
SHOULD BE AWARE THAT SMASHVILLE HAS A YEARLY COMMUNITY EASTER EGG HUNT
AT THE CENTRAL PARK. WELL, UNFORTUNATELY, THEY HAD A SEWAGE OUTBURST
THERE, AND THEREFORE IT IS NOT BEING HOSTED THERE."
"...And we care why?" Ike asked, before being punched by Link.
Master Hand sighed. "I CANNOT LET THE TRADITIONAL COMMUNITY EVENT END,
AND THEREFORE, HAVE DECIDED THAT IT SHALL BE HOSTED HERE."
The Smashers were silent for five seconds flat. These five seconds
were spent envisioning the nightmarish image of little children
running wild across the grounds of the Smash Mansion, eagerly
snatching up candy-filled eggs and destroying everything in the
"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" Fox screamed, before passing out on the ground.
"No, nope, nuh-UH! We are so like TOTALLY not doing that!" Marth
growled, marching in the direction of Master Hand but tripping over
the unconscious Fox.
"Not happenin'! Do ya remember the LAST time we did somethin' like
this?" Snake asked nobody specifically. "We had little brats tearing
up our stuff and taking everything we owned!"
"Um... Snake? That was a yard sale..." Pikachu pointed out.
"Wait a second, you can talk, Pikachu?" Red asked in awe.
Pikachu gulped. "Sorry, I wasn't supposed to tell anyone!" he said
before quickly shooting himself with a gun he randomely pulled out.
Alas, it was only a water gun, so all Pikachu did was electrify a bit
of water, which fell onto the ground and the electricity started a
small fire, which eventually set the entire mansion ablaze.
Of course, nobody noticed. They were too busy screaming on about how
horrific this would all be.
Lets see... Pit was ripping his wings off, Wolf was eating his own
blaster, DK was sucking his thumb in fear, Fox was still lying
unconscious, Peach was crying, Olimar was angrily attacking his
pikmin, Snake was hiding in his box, Link and Zelda were trying to cut
the Triforce symbols off their hands, Sonic was madly running in
circles, cutting through the carpet, the Ice Climbers were whacking
themselves with their own hammars...
Yeah, nothing's more scary than knowing a bunch of random people will
be searching for eggs on your property.
"EVERYONE SHUT UP!" Master Hand shouted, breaking through the
seemingly infinite sound barrier of the Smasher's commotion. Everyone
quickly piped down at the sound of the Hand's furious voice.
"LISTEN, I KNOW YOU ALL HATE THIS IDEA, BUT PLEASE DON'T FREAK OUT. I
KNOW Y'ALL GOT PLENTY OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT,"
"WAH! I didn't!" Wario announced angrily.
"THAT'S GREAT. SHUT UP." Master Hand growled impatiently. "NOW LOOK,
ME AND CRAZY HAND ALREADY HID THE EASTER EGGS THROUGHOUT THE FRONT
YARD. ALL YOU GUYS HAVE TO DO IS MAKE SURE THE KIDS HAVE FUN HUNTING
THEM. SOUND GOOD?"
The Smashers thought for a minute, and eventually they all slowly
nodded. Watching a bunch of kids couldn't be that hard, right?
If Master Hand could grin, he would have been grinning (well duh).
"EXCELLENT, I'M GLAD YOU ALL DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS. THE EVENT
STARTS IN JUST ABOUT AN HOUR, SO PREPARE YOURSELVES." "That's MY line!" Ike shouted angrily. A random pot flew out of
nowhere and slammed him in the head, knocking the warrior out cold.
Toon Link chuckled and hid the rest of the pots behind his back. Mario
watched this, and sighed.
This was going to be a long Easter.
Pit gulped as he stood outside the Smash Mansion with Captain Falcon.
The two of them had been ordered by Master Hand to greet the children
that were to arrive for the egg hunt, in a typical friendly fashion.
Now, both Pit and Captain Falcon were extremely brave fighters, but
for some reason, fear was still gripping at the bottom of their souls.
Why would it be, though? They had faced monsters, armies, even
Subspace, and yet, somehow, the sound of thousands of kids visiting
the Smash Mansion sounded more horrifying than all.
"Hey, Pit, is that them in the distance?" Captain Falcon suddenly
asked, pulling the angel out of his thoughts. Pit blinked and peered
over the horizon. Sure enough, he could make out dark silhouettes
carrying baskets, most likely for gathering easter eggs.
"...Should be." Pit said after a brief moment. Well, maybe this
wouldn't be as bad as he thought it would be! After all, Smashville
didn't have the BIGGEST community in the world, right? Besides, the
kids were probably going to be easy to get along with. They would most
likely just politely walk around, slowly gathering eggs and-
"Good Lord! Pit! WHAT ARE THOSE THINGS?" the angel heard Captain
Falcon shout. Pit turned to face where the silhouettes had been in the
distance, and paled.
The 'kids in the distance' had gotten closer...
...And these were no kids.
Meta Knight blinked. He thought he had heard the sound of a little
girl's scream, which meant he had heard Pit screaming. The knight
shrugged as he heard nothing else, and walked up to his room in the
"OOH, THAT'S THEM! THEY'VE ARRIVED!" Master Hand exclaimed, floating
over to the door. He opened it, and without giving much observation,
began reciting his greeting.
"WELCOME TO THE SMASH MANSION! I'M SURE YOU'RE ALL HERE TO PARTAKE IN
THE ANNUAL COMMUNITY EASTER EGG HUNT, WHICH IS BEING HELD HERE THIS
YEAR, AND- HOLY STARFY!"
At the door, standing before Master Hand, were the creepiest, most
demented looking children the disembodied hand had ever seen.
They were drooling, and their eyes glowed with an evil greed. They
were also chanting about candy. They also had evil, dark auras
emmiting from them. Also, they looked more like zombies than kids. Oh,
and also, they were carrying beat-up, nearly dead versions of Pit and
"WHERE IS THE CANDY?" a nine-year-old boy screeched.
"...CRAP." Master Hand said.
And that was when the army of zombie-like children stampeded through
the Smash Mansion, albeit the egg hunt was originally planned to take
Samus saw the approaching brats of doom and quickly charged her
cannon. Her suit was picking up severely dangerous power coming from
the children, and that was never a good thing. Taking careful aim at
what appeared to be a 12-year-old zombie, she fired.
The kid smirked and deflected the blast off of his chest, sending it
hurtling back towards the bounty hunter.
"SAMUS!" Snake shouted, running over and inspecting the fallen woman.
He gasped. That kid's deflective chest knocked her out cold.
Snake growled and turned towards the army of crazed children. They had
no right to terrorize the Smash Mansion! They had no right to hurt
Samus! They had no right to demand eggs instead of finding them
It was time to take action.
Snake narrowed his eyes at the oncoming army, got into a crouching
...Hid in a box.
"Hey, look, a box." Some random kid said, picking the box up (with
Snake still inside), and walking off.
"AAAAAAHHH!" Snake screamed. "SOMEBODY SAVE ME!"
Mario suddenly burst into the room, with every other Smasher following behind.
"You-a kids have gone-a too far!" the plumber shouted. "Smashers, charge!"
And it was then that an epic battle ensued.
Red pulled out one of his pokeballs, intent on sending Charizard out
onto someone. He threw it at one of the kids. Suddenly, the kid
grabbed it out of thin air and ate it whole.
"NO! CHARIZARD!" Red screamed. He collapsed on the ground and began
crying his eyes out. Several of the other Smashers were having similar
Snake had been yanked out of his box and thrown into a wall, Master
Hand was trampeled, DK and Diddy had been embedded into the ground,
Samus, Pit, and Captain Falcon were all still unconscious, Meta
Knight's sword had broken, Mario and Luigi were being forced to eat
their own hats, Olimar was mourning over the loss of thousands of
pikmin, Zelda, Link, and Toon Link were getting their hair ripped
Welp, I guess some kids are just plain evil.
Popo groaned as a small kid threw him into a wall. His eyes began to
close as he felt his consciousness leave him. He watched helplessly as they closed in on him.
Suddenly, a large white rabbit charged into the room, whacking the
kids away from Popo with his ears.
Popo gasped. "E-Easter Bunny? Is it really you?"
The Easter Bunny didn't answer and dove into the army of kids, hacking
and slashing and doing things FAR too violent to be put in a T-rated
Anyway, the oversized rabbit continued with his Chuck Norris-like show
before doing a final, large foot stomp, causing all of the remaining
enemies to fall off their feet.
The bunny stood silently for a minute, before turning to the Smashers.
"Is everyone okay?" it asked.
"AAAAAAUUUGGHHHH! IT'S A GIANT BUNNY! KILL IT!" Ike screamed.
Fox blinked. "Uh, right. DIE!"
"Wait, don't hurt me!" the Easter Bunny pleaded at Fox and Ike. That
didn't work, so the bunny began to panic.
"WAIT, GUYS! STOP! IT'S JUST ME!" the 'Easter Bunny' then reached to
the top of his head, revealing him to be...
"What th-, you were GANONDORF this entire time? WHAT THE SMELL?" Ike
Ganondorf sighed and climbed out of his ridiculously oversized rabbit
costume. "Yes, Ike, I have a part time job working as the Easter Bunny
"...Easter Bunny? ...You? BWAHAHAHA!" Toon Link burst out laughing.
Ganandorf glared daggars at Toon Link (literally, he did. Toon Link
literally had to pull the daggers out of his back), and spoke again.
"As funny as it sounds, I just saved you all from a bunch of easter
egg obsessed kids."
"Oh, yes, thank you! And for that, we owe you our lives!" Popo and
Ganandorf brushed it off. "Nah, just forget about it. Gnat1 will
probably put us through some sort of miserable death trap again soon."
"...And that would be the 4th wall you just broke." Lucario pointed
out with a sigh. Soon, random explosions shot through as the real
world collided with fanfiction, pigs began to fly, elephants drove
SUVs, and everyone beat up Ganandorf for stupidiotically breaking the
And overall, Easter was AWESOME!
Gnat1: Yes, for those of you who read "A Super Smashin' Christmas",
you will find that Ganandorf is both Santa Claus AND the Easter Bunny.
I hope you all had a great Easter Sunday, and that you enjoyed this
Feel free to leave a review, and remember, candy-obsessed-kid-zombies
are evil, and never host a community easter egg hunt!