A/N: This is just pure crackiness, guys. Pure crackiness. READ AND REVIEW! Co-written with koli-chan. Do you want more? THEN TELL ME!


Ezio woke an hour late. Really, living in the Jedi embassy in Rome did that to you. The assassin put on his robe and hood, and then stuck his super cool hidden blades in his sleeves. He ran down stairs, looking for some food. Ezio spotted a bowl of good-looking toast, and then dashed out the door. Like he always said, breakfast is the most important meal of the day!

(Cuts to Pearl sitting at computer, shaking and staring at a knife stabbed into table that reads, "I NEVER SAY THAT.")

Jedi Master Yoda walked down, just to miss Ezio walking out the door. He looked at the table where his toast normally was, BUT IT WAS GONE! The green Jedi saw a bird feather on the floor, and knew immediately who it was! Revenge on Ezio would be sweet…. But he was too good for that kind of thing. Who would be able to do it for him? Yoda looked at his cellphone saw a text from Anakin.

To: Master Yoda

From: Anakin


Watz up w/ Ezzie and ur toast dude

And he knew he had the perfect person…

Ezio quickly walked over to where his horse would be. Out of nowhere, his eagle vision snapped into place.

(Que koli with a knife in the back of the chair, stating: "THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN")

Looking around he could see no guards. but for whatever reason, he still felt watched, and mounted the stallion rather quickly. He'd get the novices to kill whoever it was, there was assassining to do and he had no extra time.

As Ezio rode through Roma, that feeling of being watched never quite went away. He figured it was just one of those Jedi "knights" keeping tabs on him. After all, it was suspicious to board a room, at the witching hour, slightly blood-splattered, in the embassy of some very conspicuous people.

Speaking of such conspicuous people, that green-alien-man-thing had been right behind him when he took the random yummy breakfast, and seemed less... indifferent as he had before. Maybe he had something to do with this? Deciding that seeing what the hell was up with Leonardo's glider was more important, he passed the outskirts of the city. Ezio had ridden too far in his thoughts.

"Merda!" He cursed, to no-one in particular.

except a certain Jedi by the name of... THE FUTURE DARTH VADER HAHAHAHA I SPOILED IT! his real name was Anakin Skywalker.


Down, down, you're going down...

Anakin yandere-ly sung in his head as he saw the Florencian canter by.


'Kay, time to kill. He set his lightsaber on full, and jumped out of the trees.

Ezio only had a seconds warning of rustling before a stinging, burning pain entered his skull.

"What in god's name-"

His thoughts were cut off by his death.


A/N i killed him lol. sorry for wasting your time, but i just HAD to do it.

Koli-chan out.