21Home is in your eyes
Note:
I do not have any idea or any sorts of prior knowledge about profiling and also I do not really know how law enforcement works, I was merely inspired by my favorite show, criminal minds and television show character, Emily Prentiss, both unfortunately owned by cbs. I just hope you will read my story and enjoy. I would like to say, it's my first story ever. And I'm not good at writing, but it would make me more than happy if people read this. I'm sorry if the characters are kind of out of character, I did try my best. And if some parts aren't canon, like the triathlon that would be because every part in which Beth was seen or mentioned, I forwarded or skipped. I don't like her. Sorry. And Emily's new team members were the guys I like from different Television Shows.
"What an immense power over the life is the power of possessing distinct aims. The voice, the dress, the look, the very motion of a person, define and alter when he or she begins to live for a reason."
Elizabeth Stuart Phelps
She worked for the CIA for years, she was a FBI agent and profiler, and a daughter of an ambassador for goodness sakes she should be a good at compartmentalizing. Hell, she was practically raised in this life where everything she did was under scrutiny and all she could do was compartmentalize. But at this very moment, she couldn't take it anymore.
When she was nearly killed by Ian Doyle a couple of months ago when he stabbed her in the gut with a wooden table leg, she was sent into hiding to protect herself. All those months of looking over her shoulders and the only people who knew she was still alive were Aaron Hotchner and Jennifer Jareau. It was as if she was living in a never-ending nightmare. When finally, after months of waiting, the team solved the case involving Ian Doyle and they discovered she was still alive, the way they treated her hadn't really been the same. She didn't really blame them, she kept her involvement to Doyle from them because it was classified and she didn't want them to be caught in the crossfire, but despite of her good intentions, these actions caused the others to think she didn't trust them, which wasn't true, by the way.
She merely did those things out of love, and if it would keep her family safe, she wouldn't hesitate to do it again. She explained to them her reasons and at the same time did everything she could to gain their trust again, when it seemed like she already got her life back, something happened, which made her realized that happy endings probably weren't meant for her. She woke up one morning, feeling happy and was full of hope that this day would be the best for she finally decided to tell him her well-kept feelings and undying love.
To confess to Aaron Hotchner that he's the one man that could make her heart flutter like a little girl's and the one guy that's became the reason the she still believes in fairytales and happy ever after. Her always stoic and professional boss who seemed to be always wrapped up in his own world and didn't really let anyone in , managed to have taken her heart and held it hostage. She went to work, and learned the news that broke her heart.
He met a woman at the park whom he seemed to be very attracted to. Hearing him talk about her and seeing his emotion changed as he describe her, crushed her heart. Couple of days later, the day of the triathlon came, when he reached the finished line, he went straight to that woman he was currently dating and just walked passed her as if she wasn't there.
"Is it just me or does anyone else within this awesome and magnificent group of ours, thinks that the woman standing rather close to our fearless leader and his son super Jack, seems a little off?" Penelope asked
"She does have this weird vibe coming off of her, baby girl, but maybe that's just me comparing you to other lovely women I see, who just happens to come, not even close to that high standards and hot body of yours" Derek replied
"Her hair looks awful" Jj added
"My hot blonde mama, you are totally right, It does look, what's the other word for 'awful'? Nothing? Anyone? Okay then I shall settle for awful, though I'm pretty sure there is another word for it, something that matches her hair anyway. Ooohhhhhhhhh! That spa we wanted to go to, we can go there now since your hunk is with my ever lovely Godson in your hunk's hometown! Gumdrop, are you hearing this brilliant idea?"
"Oh? What?"
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah, I'm fine, I'm not feeling well, but you guys have fun, but YOU. Dave, Spencer and Derek, don't have too much of it"
"But, fun follows me around, Emily." Dave jokingly replied
"And I'm a hot honeys magnet"
"A what?" Spencer asked, Rather confused with the turn of the conversation which was currently unfolding right before him.
"We will tell you when you are old enough".
She really didn't have anyone to vent her feelings to, probably because almost all of her friends work with the same guy, that same guy who in his part may have unintentionally broke her heart into quadrillion pieces, but that doesn't change the fact, that she is no longer sure if she still have enough water level in her body to even stand up, which was a result of her crying fest that happened for hours she no longer remembers how many.
They were working on a case involving a series of robberies and murders, during the course of the investigation, they discovered a lot of things and tons of life changing events occurred. She was nearly blown up, twice. Clyde Easter helped with the case and at the same time offered her a job of leading her own team in Interpol London. Jj decided to get married after she and Will, her boyfriend, nearly died that day, the ceremony was organized by her wonderful surrogate father and close friend David Rossi. The place was absolutely amazing and breath-taking. At the ceremony, he saw him came in with his son and his new girlfriend, looking all happy and carefree, and she almost cried. Of course, she wanted him to be happy, after all the things he had been through, he deserved to be.
His divorce, the New York bombing, him being attacked by Foyet who was a serial killer, his ex wife dying in the hands of the same serial killer and becoming an instant single father he certainly deserved the happiness, she just thought it would be with her.
"So, are you gonna accept the offer?" Derek Morgan asked her
"I am, and it's not about you guys, I love you all, you should know that. It's just, I need a change, I thought buying a house would do it, well it didn't" she explained
"Emily Prentiss, I know you are keeping something from me, tell me about it… It's about him, isn't it?"
"How did you- you know what, never mind. You are right, It's about him, ok?"
"What is bothering you?"
"Hmmm?"
"You have got that 'I still have a problem, but I don't want anyone to know because I don't want to appear weak in front of them' look. Come on tell me, I'm your best friend."
"Why her?"
"What do you mean?"
"I have been working with him, for what? Six years?! Derek, he still calls me by my last name, I can even count the times he called me by my first name with the fingers in my one hand! I wanna be happy for him, believe me I tried. But I have loved him for years, maybe ever since he worked for my mother a couple of years back. I tried to be there for him, to support him, to be that woman he would want to be with. It still wasn't enough and now he met a woman, at a park of all places, and suddenly they are together?! I just want to understand why he would choose a woman he just met and barely knew anything about, over me, a woman he had known and worked with for years….. I wanna know what was wrong with me. Seeing him tonight with her, seeing Penelope and Jj be with the men they loved even Dave was here with Strauss, you and Reid are happily dating….and…. I'm here, all alone with nothing but a cat. I know, I have you, guys. But you have your own lives to live and I have mine. And in mine, I'm alone. I guess, that being in London, accepting this job would give me the opportunity to grow and move on, be able to find someone to spend my life with" she explained and fought hard to not let the tears fall but she failed miserably and Derek hugged her close.
"Nothing is wrong with you, Emily. You are a wonderful and incredible woman. If Hotch can't see that, then he is blind and pretty stupid for a profiler he claims to be." Emily laughed at that.
"I guess I'm the stupid one, to think that he would even have the same feelings for me"
"You are not stupid, Emily. Don't even say or think about being like that, for you are much greater than you give yourself a credit for. If you really want that change, a chance to have that fresh start and move on… I'll support you, in every way I can. But you have to promise me something"
"What?"
"You won't cut us off your life. You will still call, and let us check up on you. You can have that change, but you don't have to completely forget about your past. We are here for you."
"Of course, do something for me too?"
"What?"
"Don't tell the others why, I don't want them to feel guilty for being happy for Hotch. I don't want to leave that kind of burden, you know. Please?"
"I can do that, for you, and only you. What should I tell them?"
"The truth, I suppose. Just not the part about Hotch." "Sure" Thanks, Derek".