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I see them scoffing down their greasy, slimy pizza. Beck pushes the plate closer to me and everyone gives me an expectant look. I pick up the slice and hold it near my mouth. The smell wafts into my nose and my stomach growls louder, the scent teasing me. I had to have a few bites, just to get them off my case. It won't hurt, right?

I take a bite out of the slice and chew it up in my mouth. As I swallow it I feel it slowly sliding down my throat, the feeling making me want to puke.

They watch as I take another bite. Every part of my body is screaming don't eat it, it'll make you fat. But my stomach is telling me otherwise, forcing me to finish the whole slice.

After that I instinctively eat another piece, satisfied, everyone looks away from me and starts up a new conversation. I grab another piece and I get halfway through eating it when I realise what I've done. My thoughts are racing. All I can think of is how big a mistake I've made.

My mind is a blur of caloriesfatcaloriesfatcaloriesfatcaloriesfatcalori es.

My hand shakes and my stomach gurgles, almost as if it's taunting me. I finally gave in to the temptation.

I quickly excuse myself from the table and rush to the bathrooms.

I'm not stupid. The restaurant is a busy place and there's bound to be more than one person in the women's bathroom at a time. So I go into the disability bathroom. I turn on the taps to mask the sound and I pull my hair back off my face and tuck it into my jacket. My hands are shaking as I kneel down next to the toilet and prepare myself for the pure torture to come.

It's for the best, I tell my self as I push my two fingers down my throat. I use my other hand to squeeze my neck, triggering my gag reflex. I continue to spew up into the toilet bowl for the next two minutes, trying to get rid of all the calories.

When my stomach feels empty and my throat is burning I decide that I should stop. I flush and grab a paper towel to wipe my mouth. I wash my hands, sort out my hair and pop a mint into my mouth before going back to the table.

I sit down trying to act as normal as possible. I grab my glass of water shakily, my hands still weak for the purging I just did, and gulp down the water greedily trying to soothe my sore throat.

'Are you okay, Jade? You don't look to good...' Cat says looking concerned. Oh god, they can't find out, they'll think I'm a freak...

'Um yeah I'm fine, why?' I ask, trying to sound like my usual self but my voice cracks a bit. At this point everyone has turned to look at me, with concerned looks on their faces.

'Well your eyes are all bloodshot and you look paler than usual, have you thrown up?' Tori asks me and my eyes widen. 'What? No of course not.' I stutter out nervously, they don't seem to believe me but turn around anyway.


Close shave Jade. Very close.

You have to be more careful. You can't have them find out about it, it's our little secret Jade. I'm helping you get skinny, but in return you can't tell anyone about me. If you do then they'll put you in a mental hospital, and they'll get rid of me. Then you'll be fat, and ugly, and nobody will want you.

Think about it.