Disclaimer- Do not own Young Justice or any of it's characters. If I did, what happened in Endgame would not have happened.
Got this idea the night before last and just HAD to write it! Snrk, super fun stuff for me, dear lord, especially some of Red's lines. Enjoy!
"Kid Flash, Artemis, do you have a moment?"
The two teens were a little startled to hear the rough voice of Batman hailing them as the Team dispersed after their latest mission debriefing. Their suits were worn, dirt spattered, and ripped in several places, and all any of them really wanted to do was collapse in their second rooms at the Cave.
"Uh…" Wally intoned, turning his head to share a look with his equally as baffled girlfriend. "Sure…"
What the hell else could he possibly say to the Dark Knight himself?
Batman gave them a level nod and turned with a dramatic swish of cape. Artemis and Wally both began to follow him, but they chanced a glance behind them to see that the rest of the Team had stopped and were watching them leave with varying degrees of surprise. Even Dick, who was usually on top of everything, just gave his friends a sympathetic shoulder shrug.
Seeing Batman's dark, stoic form walking ahead of them almost made Wally feel like they were heading to an execution sentence, so he reached his hand out on an impulse and clutched Artemis's hand. She raised an eyebrow at him, but said nothing, continuing along in Batman's wake.
"In here," Batman said after a short walk that felt like forever, gesturing into a small room. Wally's mouth gaped when he realized it was the Cave surveillance room; little more than a narrow slit of a room, one wall lined with top notch computers and screens with little spindly chairs sitting in front of it at intervals. He never knew such a room existed; the Cave's hologram screens could be activated anywhere to view current and dated surveillance footage, eliminating the need for such a place. He wondered how old this room was, and who had been the unlucky stiff assigned to superhero security duty.
Red Tornado and Black Canary were inside. Wally and Artemis shuffled forward, feeling a bit like fish trapped in a barrel when the ominous sound of Batman clicking the door shut echoed into the room.
"Wally, Artemis," Dinah greeted, a small smile on her face. She waved her hand toward the wall of computers. "Have a seat."
Sharing another unsure glance, the teens pulled up spindly chairs next to one another and sat, Artemis beginning to drum her fingers against her kneecaps absentmindedly; Wally reached over and placed one hand on top of hers to cease the action.
"So… is this a trial, or something?" Wally asked, trying to lighten the mood. "'Cause that's what it feels like."
"Not a trial," Red Tornado's tin voice sounded.
"Then what?" Artemis asked, pulling her sweat and dirt covered mask down. She blew a loose strand of hair away from her face.
Without a response, Batman took a few steps forward until he had situated himself in front of the two teens. His face was as unrevealing of any information as ever, but Wally thought the set of his mouth was a bit tighter than usual, as if even he regretted where the conversation was about to go. The speedster gulped.
"You two are aware that cameras are placed strategically throughout Mount Justice?" Batman inquired, gesturing to the equipment lining the wall behind them. They nodded. "And you are aware that all surveillance footage is monitored and recorded?"
"Stands to reason, I guess," Wally supplied. This meeting was getting downright bizarre. "Hopefully not with this hunk of junk," he added, kicking back with the flat of his shoe against the metal, causing a hollow ring.
"Negative. This surveillance room has been decommissioned since the days when the League used this base as headquarters," said Red Tornado. "All surveillance feeds are directly linked to the same feeds as the Watch Tower."
"Meaning?" pressed Artemis, drawing out the word.
"Meaning that whoever has surveillance duty on the Watch Tower also sees the feeds from the Cave," explained Dinah, ever patient. As if she expected this to drive something home for the two teens, she, Bats, and Red were silent, staring at them. Utterly confused as to what it was they were supposed to have realized, the young heroes glanced around awkwardly.
"Uhm… okay?" Wally said, holding out his hands. "What's this got to do with me and Artemis? Are you putting us on surveillance duty or something?"
"No. Two people were caught on a surveillance camera in your souvenir room," he says, pointing to Wally.
Wally's eyes widened a bit in curiosity.
"Who? Someone who wasn't supposed to be there?"
"I wouldn't say they weren't supposed to be there…" Dinah murmured under her breath. "Just that they were, ah, in the wrong place for the situation."
"And the situation being…?" Artemis asked, looking impatient. Dinah sighed.
"Artemis, you and Wally were the ones caught on the surveillance tape."
"Oh." Artemis blinked. "Okay."
"Specifically," Batman growled, "the two of you were caught engaging in sexual intercourse."
An unbearable and frankly uncomfortable silence followed that joyful little announcement. Wally felt his entire face heating up and wished he had full master of vibration so that he could sink his molecules right through the floor. His hand, which had previously been resting atop Artemis's above her knee, jerked away like her skin had suddenly caught fire.
This is so not happening to me… he thought wildly, unable to look at anyone in the room. He cleared his throat loudly and looked pointedly at his feet. Would zipping himself to Timbuktu be an acceptable reaction?
"Oh…" Artemis choked out after an immeasurable silence, her face as deep red as Wally's, if not more-so. "Oh my God."
Wally tried to say something, but his mouth simply opened and closed, no sound coming out. He was fairly certain that by this point, the surface temperature of his skin had fried away every last one of his poor, delicate freckles.
Dinah finally seemed to take pity on them and stepped forward to try and break the awkward; however, she only succeeded in making it worse.
"Look, Wally, Artemis, we understand that… well at least, I understand," the woman corrected, casting quick looks at Bats and Red Tornado, both of whom were rather expressionless. "Sex is a perfectly natural and healthy step in a relationship like yours. You two are young and in love, and you're certainly old enough to be making these decisions for yourselves. Which is why none of this will be reported to either of your parents."
If Wally could still breathe, he might have let loose a sigh of relief. As it were, his knuckles were stark white where they clutched at the leathery cushion of his spindly stool. His girlfriend's body was completely rigid; he did notice, upon finally braving a look in her direction, that at some point she had impulsively pulled a simple barb-tipped arrow from her quiver and was nervously running her fingers over the shaft repetitively, face still beet red. She looked like she'd like to be hiding behind the long curtain of blonde hair she had tied behind her head.
Wally turned back to Dinah and nodded numbly, cheeks burning. He couldn't believe they had been so careless, so stupid. He and Artemis were generally very private when it came to their sex lives together; what happened in their bedrooms was between only the two of them, and they both preferred it that way. But a couple of nights ago, there had been a bit of a scare on one of their missions involving Two-Face, of all people. Kid Flash had come a hair of losing his live to the demented man, and somehow the negligible satisfaction of adding the villain's double colored tie to his souvenir collection hadn't seemed quite so sweet when he thought of the cost he'd almost paid.
It seemed Artemis had shared that sentiment. She'd found him staring at his precious collection along the wall, a collection he had been coming to realize he did not admire as much as he once had when the Team was fresh and green. The two had shared a very serious, emotional conversation about how scared they had been, the risks they took on a daily basis. And then they had started kissing, tenderly at first and growing in need as his archer backed him against the wall.
It had been so fast and a little desperate; the thought of seeking the privacy of either of their rooms had never crossed their minds as they'd taken comfort in being connected. Urgency and lingering adrenaline from their almost-loss had fueled them, kept them from being as careful as they normally were.
Cave surveillance had evaded their thoughts as well, it seemed.
"I have taken the liberty of disposing of the footage," Red Tornado said abruptly, cutting Wally out of his thoughts. "Luckily, it was merely I that caught your human reproduction practices while on surveillance duty. No one else will ever see it, I assure you."
"Uh… thanks?" Wally offered; he wasn't sure whether to be thankful or horrified that a super advanced android had been witness to he and Artemis making love against the Souvenir Room wall. Still, he supposed it was better than Batman. Or the entire freaking League. Or the Team. He shuddered at the very thought.
"Are you sure it's gone?" Artemis demanded. The color in her cheeks had lightened a bit, but she looked like their very fates depended on the answer to her question. Wally supposed it did.
Batman nodded silently. Which really wasn't very reassuring to either of the mortified young heroes, so they turned to Dinah for confirmation.
"Absolutely positive," the kindly woman nodded in agreement, making both of them relax visibly. They were far from not wanting to drown themselves in embarrassment, but it was a start.
"But that leads us to the main reason we called you here," Batman grunted. "Dinah?"
The blonde stepped forward, looking very serious and concerned.
"We… actually, once again, I," Dinah began, casting the two men another look, "mostly wanted to call you here to make sure you're, well, being careful."
Please let me die. Am I dead yet? Is Black Canary giving us a sex talk? This can't be happening, this can't be my life, Wally moaned inwardly. Just when his skin had begun to cool off, Dinah had to go and start giving them a sex lecture. He's going to have sun burn… embarrassment burn. Artemis was having similar inner thoughts, but it seemed she gathered her courage back much more quickly than Wallace.
"I'm on birth control. We use condoms," she said simply, rubicund face blazing hotly. Normally he found the sight of Artemis flushed to be quite endearing, but right now all he felt was sympathy and the need to apologize to her for this whole awkward mess of a meeting.
"I'm glad to hear that," Dinah said. "But in the future, I hope you two will be more… selective about when and where you decide to get intimate."
"I-I'll take the blame for that one," Wally spoke up, finally finding his voice; there was no way he was going to have Artemis taking all the hits here. "I… I mean, we, ah, are usually more… private. Yeah. Private. But, um… er… we just…"
"Got carried away," Artemis supplied. Wally shot her a grateful glance.
Dinah seemed satisfied with their answers.
"Alright, that's all I wanted to discuss with you, but it seems you're way ahead of me. I'm not surprised, you're smart kids," she said, winking at them both. "I think we're done here."
"Right. Ah, thanks… for, you know, keeping this whole thing on the down low. We… we really appreciate it," Wally stammered out, jumping to his feet. No one said anything else, and so he grabbed Artemis's hand and the two of them hightailed it out of there.
However, as soon as they were well away, they dropped hands and walked apart from one another, both still embarrassed beyond comprehension.
"Oh my god, that was…" Artemis began in low tones.
"Something right out of a nightmare?" Wally suggested feebly, scratching at the back of his neck.
"The most embarrassing ten minutes of my entire life," she finished, rubbing at her cheeks.
They didn't speak anymore of it for the rest of the night. Wally bade Artemis goodnight at her door, but neither of them bothered for even a midnight kiss, still far too mortified with everything that had just transpired.
Needless to say, it takes them over a week before they have sex again. And even then, they find themselves at a Batman worthy level of paranoia, combing both their rooms at the Cave for hidden cameras.
Shortly after finding his room to be surveillance free, Wally finds himself grinning shamelessly into the olive skin of Artemis's bared neck, his cheeks flushed from both arousal and remembered embarrassment.
"Smile for the camera, babe?" he whispers, nipping at her flesh.
All he receives is an answering moan.
They're like 18 and 19 in this particular fic, btw.