"A Detective to Love"

By Wtchcool

Disclaimer: I own neither "Arrow," nor "Something's Gotta Give." I am merely combining the two for my own pleasure (and, I hope, that of the readers).

Chapter One: Can't Get No Relief

Oliver Queen was a father's worst nightmare.

The young billionaire's reputation as a ladies' man was well known throughout Starling City before Queen ever boarded the Queen's Gambit. It was Quentin Lance's bad luck that the rake was dating his daughter, Laurel, but Quentin did what he could to protect her. Yes, that did include threatening the young punk with his Taser if Laurel's bedroom door didn't stay open. Wouldn't any young woman's father have done the same?

Had the Gambit not been ship-wrecked, Quentin might almost have been glad that Oliver ran away with Sara. Surely nothing would make Laurel see her boyfriend's true colors better than his infidelity with her own sister.

Or so you would think.

But either Laurel loved Oliver Queen for the slime that he was or five years of absence made the heart grow ridiculously fonder. Whatever the reason, after Queen returned to his old life in Starling City, he resumed his old relationship with Laurel. The only discernible difference was that Laurel no longer lived with her parents. Which meant Quentin could no longer chaperone their get-togethers or instill the fear of god in Queen.

And people wondered why he didn't smile more.


"Dad, could you do me a favor?" Laurel asked over the phone.

"What is it?"

Laurel hadn't exactly been spoiled growing up, but that was probably because of Dinah. Laurel was the apple of Quentin's eye and as long as she wasn't asking for something unreasonable, she would get it.

"I need you to bring me some files from work."

"Where are you?"

Laurel paused, and then cleared her throat.

"Do you know the Queens' house on the beach?"

Well, even Laurel could be unreasonable at times.

"Absolutely not," he said flatly.

"Please, Dad!" Laurel wheedled. "I promised Oliver that I wouldn't do any work this weekend, but it's really piled up and I don't want to fall behind. If you could just swing by my apartment and pick up my briefcase…"

Someday, he was going to learn how to say no to her, he mused, as she gave him directions to the house. At least this was something that would annoy Queen.


The door to the Queens' beachfront property was unlocked, so Quentin went inside.

"Laurel!" he called out as he walked. "I've got the briefcase you asked for—geez!" If he jumped a little, it was only because he was startled by a half-naked Queen. For heaven's sake, it was the middle of the day. Did he really need to stroll around in nothing but his boxers? What did his daughter see in this jackass? (Maybe it was the muscles…) He scowled.

"I should've known she wouldn't be able to go a whole weekend without doing any work," Oliver sighed, as he relieved Lance of the briefcase. "Won't you join us for dinner, Detective?"

Author's Note: I am officially horrible at keeping my word about not starting another work-in-progress.

Very open to accepting help with this fic, be it someone who wants to co-author, or better yet, take over.

Story title based on the play within "Something's Gotta Give."

Chapter title from Queen's "Somebody to Love."