I do not own Harry Potter or any others characters from that universe. I am only playing with the characters for fun. Please read and review. It sometimes inspires me to write more.

The Blind Dragon

Home Alone Tribute

"Harry."

"Mmhmm."

"Do you think that Draco will be out tonight, trying to get us in trouble again?"

"I'm counting on it, actually. Watching those James Bond films at your parents over the holidays has given me some new ideas to work with. Let's just put it this way, if poor little Draco wants to try and get us in trouble again, he's in for one hell of a shocking surprise."

"What did you do, love?"

"Well, for starters, I created a rune that mimics the effects of a tazer gun. The next thing I did was to go around the castle and inscribe the rune on a point ten feet away from every broom closet within the walls of Hogwarts and then I keyed them all to be activated by a key phrase spoken to the Marauder's Map."

"Are we safe in here then?"

"Oh, most definitely. I have the map activated in my pocket right now and I have felt no less than ten different runes activate so far tonight."

"Persistent, isn't he," purred Hermione as she took him in hand and began to stroke with earnest.

"Uh huh," moaned Harry as Hermione's spectacular hands were doing the most amazing things to his John Thomas. "Did I mention that the effect is doubled each time a new rune is activated."

Hermione's hands were quickly replaced by her warm, moist lips. "You really make me hot when you use your brains like that," she managed to get out as she took more of him into her mouth.

"Did I mention that if he activates the rune outside the broom closet that we're in, it'll light him up like an x-ray machine"

Hermione pushed down on him further and soon the head of his John Thomas was buried deep in her throat. Then she started to hum.

"Mione..."

Their excursion was brought to an explosive halt however, when a howl of terrified pain came from just outside their broom closet. Hermione jerked back at the sudden noise and Harry was left helpless, as he exploded all over Hermione's face. It took almost a minute for their heart rates to slow down and another three to become presentable, before they edged open the door to the broom closet as quietly as they could.

Standing there in the middle of the hallway wasDraco Malfoy, his hair stuck out in all directions, static charges of electricity still sparking here and there. His face was blackened from soot and his Acromantula silk robes were emitting puffs of smoke every now and then. To top it all off, one second, he was corporeal and the next, you could see his skeletal make-up as he flickered between both states.

In the distance, Harry and Hermione watched as Draco's two goons rounded the corner. Crabbe and Goyle, upon seeing their boss just standing there, emitting puffs of smoke, made a beeline straight for him.

"Boss, are you alright?" inquired Goyle, a hint of humour in his voice.

Not wanting to be discovered, Harry nudged Hermione so that he could close the door before pulling out the map, but as the door was about to click shut, he heard Draco's distinctive petulant voice say, "Goyle, the next time I come up with another brilliant plan I want you to punch me in the mouth."

If it wasn't for Hermione's quick thinking, they would have been found out right there as they collapsed to the floor in gails of laughter, but thanks to Hermione's quick wand work, the silencing charms had been put back in place.

"Mr. Potter, you're going to get sooo lucky tonight," managed Hermione amidst her fits of giggles.

Harry's mind was spinning. Suddenly he latched onto Draco's parting words. Wearing an evil grin, Harry pointed his wand and whispered "Ventriloquis sempera sic."

###

Arriving at breakfast, a dishevelled Draco showed up with his two goons. The soot was gone, but the reek of smoke and singed hair remained.

Harry turned and winked at Hermione while pointing his wand at the Malfoy heir.

He whispered, "Goyle, what I want you to do while I sneak up on Potter is ..."

The sound of Draco's whining voice was clear, even if the words weren't. Goyle raised his fist and punched Malfoy in the face, causing the loss of two teeth and a badly split lip.

When he woke up in the infirmary, Draco would swear blind that he hadn't actually said anything beyond, "Pass the butter."