156A/N: So much thanks to my beta Alice aka darlingwendy!
In four days' time, Cooper had managed to turn a pristine hotel room into a complete pit. There were already fast food sacks and and clothes strewn everywhere - how many times did he need to change in one day, anyway? Blaine stepped around wadded up shirts and crumpled jeans, hoping not to wrinkle them any more than they already were, as he attempted to get to the mirror.
Cooper laid across the bed, texting on his phone. Blaine could see him as he leaned closer to the mirror, checking to make sure his bow tie was on straight. Mike and Tina were perched on one of the chairs to the side, Tina on Mike's lap as they talked quietly.
"You're fidgeting again."
"You know me," Blaine responded. "It's what I do when I'm nervous. Not like it's my wedding day or anything."
Cooper dropped the phone onto the bed and sat up straight. "Where's Sam?"
Blaine sighed, heart stuttering in a way that made him feel slightly empty. "I already told you. He's not coming."
"No, I know that," Cooper said. "What I want to know is why isn't he coming? Why are you here, nervous as hell, and Sam's wherever the fuck out there and letting me be your best man instead of doing it himself?"
"I thought you'd be happy to be my best man," Blaine mumbled, looking down as he untied and retied his tie so he at least had something to do with his hands. "You'd be the best man at my wedding just like I was the best man at yours."
Cooper frowned, leaning up against the dresser next to Blaine. "You know, when you asked Sam to be your best man, at first I was really confused. And a little offended. I didn't get it. Like, I always thought brothers were supposed to be your best men unless you didn't have one."
Blaine honestly didn't know how to defend himself, how he could explain his choice to Cooper, but he didn't need to. Cooper continued without pause.
"But, for my weddings, I also didn't have a 'Sam.' I don't have a best friend who knows me inside and out, who I couldn't stand to live without. But you do. And he should be here, in my place, and you need him here."
Blaine said nothing, but he did drop his hands, placing them on the dresser in front of him so he had something to support himself. He couldn't tell Cooper the real reason Sam wasn't there, not now -
"You figured it out, didn't you?" Cooper stared at Blaine, trying to read him, but Blaine didn't move. He barely breathed. "What I wouldn't tell you. You know that Sam - and you - and god you're such an idiot - "
"Cooper? Shut up," Blaine snapped. "Can you just - can you please just be my best man? That's all you have to do, just stand there and hand me these rings when it's time. Can you do that?" He fished the rings out of his pocket and turned to Cooper, thrusting his arm out to him. Cooper glared, but extended his hand, allowing Blaine to place the rings in his palm roughly. "Thank you."
"Whatever. I'm going to go check on the ceremony, see if it's time." Cooper grabbed his jacket and phone from the bed, slamming the door on his way out of the room. Tina and Mike looked at Blaine, wide-eyed, probably having heard the last part of the conversation, if not all of it. Tina looked as if she wanted to say something, maybe give Blaine some comfort, but Blaine shook his head.
"The wedding's probably going to start soon. Just…go with him."
They both nodded, leaving quickly to give Blaine some space to calm himself down. He leaned over the dresser, breathing slowly and heavily and trying his hardest not to look into the mirror.
"Blaine?"
He didn't hear the key slot click or the door open, but he did look up to see his mother step inside carefully, surveying the room with a grimace.
"Over thirty and he still can't pick up a damn t-shirt," Laura said, leaning down and picking up one of the shirts on the floor and folding it. Blaine smiled, the familiar domestic sight calming him down slightly.
"Hi, Mom."
"Hi, sweetie. Look at you," Laura cooed, stepping forward to grab Blaine and get a better view of him. "You look so handsome. My little boy has grown up so much."
"Moooom," Blaine groaned, but he smiled all the same.
"Are you excited?"
Blaine wanted to respond, he did, but the residual hollow feeling in his chest that had been there for a day - or maybe a month, growing slowly - made him stop.
But his mom understood. "Are you scared?"
Blaine nodded and gulped.
"Oh, honey. Do you think it's just cold feet?"
He wanted it to be. So badly. "I don't know, Mom," he said honestly, sitting down on the bed. Laura followed him, rubbing her palm over his shoulder blade soothingly. "Maybe? It's just that…" But he couldn't put words to what he was feeling.
"Blaine." Laura took Blaine's cheeks in her hands, turning his face to make him look at her. "It's normal. And it's okay. This is such an important time in your life and everything's going to change because of it. It's okay to be scared."
"But everything's supposed to be coming together, right?" Blaine asked. "That's what a wedding's all about. But lately it just feels like everything's falling apart, and I don't know what to do about it. Nothing is turning out like I expected it to."
"Sometimes things just happen that way," Laura said. "Sometimes things happen, and they're completely unplanned. But even the most completely unexpected things can turn out to be amazing, if you let them." She nudged his shoulder, hinting at something that Blaine had been suspicious about for years.
"I wasn't planned, was I?"
Laura laughed. "No, honey, you weren't. It was just supposed to be Cooper, but then you came along and surprised us all. But, like I said. You are one of the most incredible things that ever happened to me and your father, just as much as Cooper is. Don't you ever forget that."
Blaine let his mom pull him into a hug, squeezing her back tightly. As she pulled away, he hesitated. "Mom?"
"Mmm?"
"I… I don't know what to do. Because like you said, I didn't plan on Paris, and it might turn out to be really cool. But I can't…I can't decide. On Paris. Because there's…"
"There's something else?" Laura filled in when Blaine trailed off. Blaine nodded. "Something unexpected? And you don't know if that might be better instead?" Blaine nodded again, happy that his mom got it, even if he knew he shouldn't even be debating the two.
Blaine saw her hesitate for a moment. "Blaine, does this have anything to do with Sam?"
Blaine nodded slowly. Laura didn't push any further, and Blaine was grateful for it.
Laura patted Blaine's shoulder, searching for the right words to say. "I know I'm supposed to be one hundred percent supportive and say yes, it's just cold feet, you'll be fine once the wedding's over. But I can't do that. Because I don't think what you're feeling right now is just cold feet. I don't know what's going on with you and Sam, I'm not even completely sure what's going on between you and Kurt, but I think, if you're scared and doubtful about the wedding, now is the time to say so. Marriage is for a lifetime. Well, it's supposed to be. It's better to say you're not ready right now, if it's true, than to have to deal with a divorce later if your fears come true."
She reached up, stroking Blaine's hair over the gel. "Blaine, I can't make this decision for you. I can't tell you which road to pick. But I can give you advice, and my advice is that you need to go with your heart. Do what your heart is telling you. Do what it wants. I think that's where you're going to be your happiest."
Blaine nodded, silent as he processed her advice. She pulled him into another hug, then stood, straightening her dress.
"I'm going to go out there and tell them you need a little more time, okay? And I want you to know this - whatever choice you make, I will love you, no matter what. And there are so many people out there that will still love you, too. All of your family, all of your real friends. They will love you. And they'll understand."
Laura left the room, closing the door softly. Blaine stood, checking himself in the mirror one more time, and looked at his tuxedo jacket, hanging lifelessly on display as it waited to be worn in the wedding. He rapped his fingers against the dresser, nerves already building and heart pounding in his chest as he tried to, true to the cliche, listen to his heart.
He grabbed his phone, walking straight past the tuxedo jacket and out of the room.
"Get up."
Sam groaned, blinking at the sudden sunlight streaming into his bedroom. He rolled over, turning his face into his pillow and attempting to go back to sleep. It didn't matter what time it was, he knew for a fact he had absolutely nothing to do that day and could spend the entire day in bed wallowing in self-pity if he wanted to.
But, judging by the pillow thrown at his back, he wouldn't be granted that much.
"Sam, get up."
Sam squinted one eye open, looking at the doorway. Cooper stood there, arms crossed.
"The fu-"
"Get out of bed and get dressed, or I'll pull the covers off of you and expose all of your naked glory."
"I'm wearing boxers," Sam said, still confused. "What the hell are you doing"
"What am I doing? What are you doing?" Cooper asked, marching forward and taking some of the duvet in his hands and pulling. Sam tugged back quickly on his end, not trying to preserve any modesty, but he still didn't want to leave the warmth underneath. Thankfully, Sam eventually won the tug of war.
Cooper huffed. "You're laying in bed like an ass while Blaine is at the hotel, practically shaking, he's so scared, because he's about to get married and doesn't know what the hell he's doing and doesn't have the most important person in his life to comfort him."
"I'm not the most-"
"Bullshit. You're being pathetic."
"Hey!"
"You are!" Cooper insisted. "You're literally about to lose your last chance to be with Blaine, forever. How is that not pathetic?"
"What chance? I don't have a chance!" Sam yelled, finally snapping. It registered in his head too late that Cooper knew he was in love with Blaine, but it didn't matter anymore. The whole world could know he was in love with Blaine, he didn't give a fuck, because he still couldn't be with him. "I talked to him last night, and he's still choosing Kurt. There is no chance."
"Then man the fuck up and go be his best friend. Go be his best man, or, fuck, at least go talk to him." Sam began to protest, but Cooper cut him off with a wave of his hand. "He needs you. I don't know what exactly went down last night, but he needs to know that you two are okay."
Sam shook his head, the defeat he'd been feeling since the night before sinking in again. "I can't."
"Then you're not the person I thought you were."
"What is this, Legally Blonde?" Sam said. "What do you care anyway, Cooper?"
Cooper folded his arms over his chest, looking at Sam like he was an idiot. Or, at least, more than he had been. The look mostly said that Sam should already know exactly what he was about to say. "You make my brother happier than I've ever seen him," Cooper said simply. "And losing you is hurting him just as much as it's hurting you. I don't know about you, but I always want to see my little brother happy."
Sam knew Cooper meant Sam would want to make someone like his own little brother Stevie happy if he could, which, of course he would, but in that moment he still only imagined Blaine's smile in his head, the wide grin that always warmed Sam down to his toes. "But…he's still getting married. He's choosing Kurt."
Cooper shrugged. "Maybe."
"What?"
"Look, just… go talk to him," Cooper said, casually diverting Sam. "Give it one last try. What have you got to lose?"
"I don't want to make him uncomfortable…"
"You won't. He wants you there. Now, put some pants on and let's go."
Sam threw back the covers, already reaching for a pair of jeans on his floor before a thought occurred to him. "Wait, wasn't the wedding supposed to start by now? What if they're already at the altar?"
"Tina's stalling. And it's not like they can get married without me anyway, I have the rings. Now let's go!"
Blaine had been standing outside of the white wooden door, number 714 written on a brass plate at the top, for at least five minutes. It didn't seem very long normally, but at that moment, the second dragged by like walking through quicksand. He knew what he needed to do, he knew there were people waiting, wondering what was causing the hold up, but the door looked incredibly ominous for something so plain and Blaine's hands felt heavy at his sides, unwilling to knock and face what was on the other side of the door.
He took a deep breath and knocked anyway.
"Come in!"
Blaine turned the knob, opening the door with ease. The room inside looked completely different from Cooper's; reds had been replaced with pure whites, a floor-length mirror standing in the middle of the room while a twin bed had been pushed to the side. Kurt stood in front of the mirror, putting the final touches on his tuxedo, but looked up at Blaine as he entered.
"Isn't this bad luck or something? Seeing the groom on the wedding day?" Kurt joked. "I know it's actually supposed to be the bride, but we're kind of lacking there."
He smiled, turning fully to Blaine, but stopped when he saw the look on Blaine's face.
"What's wrong?"
Blaine opened his mouth, but no words came out.
"Blaine?" Kurt's voice was shaking. Blaine swallowed.
"Kurt…"
"We're not getting married, are we?"
Blaine, hesitantly, shook his head. He braced himself for an outburst, but surprisingly, Kurt's face just…fell.
"Is it because of the kids thing?" Kurt ask, already resigned.
"No," Blaine said honestly. "The kids are part of it, but there's more than that. It's because…Kurt, what you and I want are two completely different things. Our lives could go in two different directions right now, and you and I don't want to go the same direction. There's not a way both of us could be completely happy."
"Because you don't want Paris."
Blaine nodded slowly. "Because I don't want Paris. And because you don't want kids. Because…because there are some things in our relationship, some problems, that have been there forever, and I haven't said anything because I wanted to just try to forget they even existed, and I think you wanted that too, but they're just never going to get fixed. Not at this point. Because they're part of who we are as individuals, especially when it comes to what we need, and we just can't give each other what the other person needs anymore. If we ever could."
Blaine rocked on his heels before taking a step forward, hoping Kurt wouldn't back away. Kurt did stay rooted to his spot, but his hunched shoulders and lowered chin told Blaine that he probably shouldn't try to come any closer.
"I love you Kurt, I really do, and I think I always will, in some way. But love just-"
"-Isn't enough?" Kurt finished. "That was a little cheesy."
"I'm sorry," Blaine said, then repeated himself, not just apologizing for the wording anymore. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that it took me this long to realize and own up to all of this. Especially since I'm doing it right before what was supposed to be our wedding."
"At least you didn't do it at the altar," Kurt supplied.
Blaine's mouth quirked into a sad smile, similar to Kurt's, but he could see right through Kurt's joking facade to the hurt underneath. "I'll completely understand if you never forgive me."
"Honestly?" Kurt said. "I'm not sure that I ever will." Blaine took a deep breath. He'd expected that, but the words still sucked to hear. "But I'll move on. I'll have Paris."
"And you'll be incredibly successful, and you'll find a guy who can give you what I can't, who will fit in your life perfectly and travel all over the world with you and love you so much. Because you are the perfect guy, Kurt. Just…not the perfect guy for me."
Kurt looked Blaine directly in the eyes, his own eyes searching. "I need to know. Is there someone else?"
Blaine thought of Sam, of how he was going to go back to their apartment that night and try to work things out, and see where their relationship would lead, but he shook his head. "I'm not leaving you for someone else." That part was honest. "I'm leaving you because of the things between us."
"Cryptic," Kurt said, "but I'll take it. It'll help me keep my dignity, at least."
Kurt looked down at his hands, twisting his engagement ring around his finger a few times before pulling it off and extending it to Blaine. "Take this."
Blaine didn't reach for the ring. He knew it was his fault, but the sight was still hard to take in. "Are you sure you don't want to keep it? Sell it, throw it into a river, something?"
Kurt laughed, but there was a thickness in the back of his throat. "No, you do whatever you want with it. I think I want to start a fresh life as soon as possible. This will help." He took Blaine's hand in his own, placing the ring in his palm and cupping Blaine's fingers around it. They dropped hands at the same time, Blaine's hand heavy and warm.
There was a sudden awkward tension between them, neither knowing what to say now that things seemed so official. Finally, Kurt spoke.
"I don't mean to be rude, but maybe you should go now. Let me cry in peace. Or maybe trash the hotel room, I don't know."
Blaine nodded in assent, shoving the ring into his pocket. "I can do that. I need to go talk to someone, anyway." He turned to leave, but looked back over his shoulder.
"Kurt?" Blaine paused. "I'm really sorry. Again."
"Me too," Kurt said. "Goodbye, Blaine."
"Goodbye, Kurt," Blaine replied, echoing the words they swore they'd never say. He walked out of the room before he could do anything else, closing the door behind him for good.
A/N: Thank you so much for reading! Reviews are welcome and loved, and if you came here from Tumblr, please go like and reblog the post for this chapter if you liked it!