Funny story; this entire chapter was meant to be a 1,500 word filler before some other actual plot stuff happened, and it just evolved into this monstrosity XD. So enjoy this fillery chapter! We'll have actual moving plot in the next chapter. Thank you all for your support and reviews/subs/favs are always appreciated!


Alice had all but forced Jack to stay in Tortuga until Lydia eventually showed up. Not only did Alice want to see at least one sister get married, but she also needed some time on steady ground to get used to one-armed motherhood. Part of her also wanted to keep an eye on Barbossa, too. He'd done nothing but sulk in the back corner of The Faithful Bride since the day they docked. It'd only been a week, but he'd been acting as if it'd been centuries since he'd last seen Lydia.

His moping was really starting to bum her out.

Alice entered The Faithful Bride and immediately got two large glasses of rum from the bar. Granted, carrying two bottles of rum with one hand was tricky, but she managed. She plopped herself directly in front of Barbossa, practically slamming the drinks down in front of her. He glanced up and rolled his eyes at her. "Don't ye have a kid to be worrying about right now?"

"Jack's watching her," Alice said.

"And that ain't concerning to ye?"

"He's good with her," Alice replied, taking a drink from her rum. Damn, it was good to be able to drink alcohol again. She missed the burn of rum as it went down her throat and warmed her stomach. "Gibbs is also keeping tabs on him, though."

"Why're ye here, Shrimp?" he asked, grabbing his fresh bottle of rum and downing almost all of it in one gulp.

"I'm tired of hearing about you moping in the back of a bar," she said plainly, taking another sip of her drink. "Thought you could use a brooding buddy."

"I'm not brooding," Barbossa snapped, sliding the empty bottle to the side. Alice arched an eyebrow and took another long drink of rum, not breaking eye contact with him at all. He let out a defeated sigh. "I'm not brooding much." Alice kept drinking and narrowed her eyes. "Really, Shrimp? I'm not brooding in a corner."

"Sure, you're not," she finally said.

"She's constantly on me mind," he finally admitted in a low murmur. "Waitin' for her to come back to me is agony." He tensed his jaw and clenched a fist on the table. "I lost 'er twice already. I don't like the idea of losin' her a third time."

"She'll be back," Alice reassured him. "Trust me. Nothing's going to keep her from coming back to you." Alice let out a smile and added, "You lasted for almost a year without her. What's one more month?"

"Hell, apparently," he muttered to himself. Alice let out a huff and leaned against her good arm, pouting at the older man's moping.

"Alright, here's what's gonna happen," Alice said. "I'm gonna get most of the crew to come over here, and we're playing drinking games. I'm not gonna rest until you're drunk off your ass and having a good time. Got it?" Barbossa let out a groan and glared at her.

"I'm not in me twenties anymore," he grumbled. "I'm too old for the likes of drinking games."

"You say that like I'm giving you a choice," Alice said as she rose to her feet. "Order us some shots. I think I see some of our men over there."

"How many?" he grudgingly asked.

"Yes," was Alice's only response. She caught him mutter a string of curses under his breath. Alice weaved her way through the loud, boisterous crowds of drunken men and women and shouted out to get the attention of the crew she saw. Pintel, Ragetti, and Marty, along with their newest additions of Murtogg and Mullroy, all turned their heads towards her at once.

"Alice!" Pintel shouted. "You drinking with us?"

"Nope!" Alice shouted. "Get your asses over here! I'm roping Barbossa into drinking games!"

"Which one?" Ragetti asked.

"It's one I came up with a while back," Alice said. "Marty knows it!"

"The coin flipping one or the card game one?" Marty asked.

"Let's do the coin-flipping one!" Alice answered with a smirk. That was definitely a fun drinking game. There were some crazy nights on the Pearl with that particular game. Marty laughed and jumped off his seat. The others must've taken that as a good sign because they immediately followed suit, taking their giant bottles of rum with them. Alice giggled and darted back through the crowds back to Barbossa, who had managed to get an entire round of shots from a serving girl. Alice slid back into her seat across from Barbossa while the others dragged chairs from nearby tables and crowded around the table that was far too small for seven people.

"What're we doin', Shrimp?" Barbossa questioned.

"Okay, so we a coin, first of all," Alice said. Barbossa immediately procured a piece of eight from his pocket and slammed it down on the table. "Alright, so basically we take turns flipping a coin. We all call heads or tails and whoever loses the coin toss takes a shot and has to answer a question of the coin flipper's choosing. The game ends when at least one of us is unconscious."

"Lord have mercy..." Barbossa muttered.

"I'm in!" Pintel said. Alice laughed and took the coin in her hand. She look down and realized that flipping this thing would be a little bit harder given her one arm.

"Shit..." she muttered. "I'll figure this out." Barbossa rolled his eyes and plucked the coin from her hand.

"I'll flip for ye," he said. "I call heads."

"Tails," Pintel said.

"Heads," Ragetti said.

"Tails," Murtogg and Mullroy said simultaneously.

"Tails," Marty said. Alice gave Barbossa a nod and he flipped the coin smoothly. Alice looked across the table and smirked. Tails. Barbossa let out a low growl and downed his shot of rum. Ragetti did the same.

"Okay," Alice said with a smirk. "Strangest thing you've eaten?"

"Balut, Philippines," Ragetti said, shuddering at the memory. Barbossa grimaced and nodded his head.

"Aye, same," Barbossa said. He handed the coin off to Pintel, who sat to Alice's left. Alice, Marty, and Mullroy all ended choosing heads while Ragetti, Barbossa, and Murtogg all called tails. To Alice's misfortune, it landed on tails.

"Shit," she said with a laugh. She and the others drank their shots in one smooth motion. "Alright, bring it on, Pintel."

"If you could sleep with anyone at this table, who would it be?" he asked with a smirk. Alice let out a bark and slammed her head down on the table. She was about to dig herself into a hole pretty soon. Damn him and that question... Then again, reactions would be hilarious.

"That's easy, Alice," Marty said.

"Same, Alice," Mullroy said. "Given she's the only woman at this table, the choice is obvious innit?" Alice looked up and felt all six pairs of eyes looking directly at her. She sighed and straightened up. She waited for the exact moment Barbossa was downing a fresh bottle of ale to say her answer.

"Barbossa," she said. Barbossa immediately widened his eyes and spat out his drink. Everyone at the table immediately burst into uncontrolled laughter while Barbossa stared at Alice slack-jawed.

"Didn't expect that," he finally said.

"Who'd you think I'd go for?" Alice asked.

"Ragetti!" he answered, pointing to the one-eyed man who was now beet red. Alice let out a hum and shrugged.

"I mean, he's a close second," Alice said. "But you have the more debonair swagger I like in a man. Not to mention, I have a fancy for older men. I'd never go for it, though. You're Lydia's through and through."

"Aye," he said with a smirk. "You're a fine lass to be sure, but I'm a faithful man to me betrothed."

"No one at this table speaks of this again, clear?" Alice said. There were collective nods. It was probably for the best that the subject was never spoken of again.

"Just to be clear, though," Ragetti said. "You'd definitely sleep with me?"

"I mean, if the mood was right, sure," Alice replied. "But I generally don't sleep with other crew members. Things can get too messy, y'know?" Pintel slid the coin over to Ragetti who picked it up. "Moving on. I call tails." Barbossa, Mullroy, Murtogg, and Marty also called tails. Ragetti was the only one who called heads this round. Ragetti flipped the coin, and to everyone but Pintel's displeasure, it landed on heads. The five losers all downed their shots simultaneously and looked expectantly at Ragetti.

"Alright, um... Favorite color?" Ragetti asked hesitantly. Alice laughed at the question. Favorite color? Any question in the universe was fair game but he goes with favorite color?

"What kind of question is that?" Pintel asked. "C'mon, pick something juicy!"

"I'm not wanting to rile anyone up," Ragetti argued.

"Green," Alice said. "A deep mossy green."

"The blue o' the sea," Barbossa said with a faint smile on his face. "Though, I've taken a fancy to grey as of late."

"Red," Marty said.

"Mine's green, too," Murtogg said.

"Violet," Mullroy answered. Marty grabbed the coin from the center of the table and looked around expectantly at everyone. This turn, Alice and Barbossa called head while the others called tails. Marty flipped the coin and it landed on heads.

"Finally! A break!" Alice shouted as the other four men took their shots. The question Marty asked ended up being too boring for her to pay attention to. She started drinking her bottle of ale when she felt a pair of hands suddenly grab her shoulders. She jumped and spun around.

Before her eyes was a woman with long, wavy brown hair in a braid down her back, golden bronze skin, and big brown eyes lit up by a teasing smirk. Alice recognized her at once and squealed. "Bex! Oh my god!" She jumped to her feet and hugged Bex immediately. Alice sent a mocking glare to Marty and said, "You saw her coming, didn't you?"

"Aye," Marty replied with a laugh. The other men at the table, though, seemed to have no idea who Bex was and gave each other slightly confused looks.

"It's been too long, Alice," Bex said as she smoothly dragged over a chair and straddled it. She dropped her jaw when she finally seemed to notice Alice's missing left arm. "Yeah... definitely too long. When did the-"

"Oh, the battle with Davy Jones outside of Shipwreck," Alice answered. "You've also missed me having a child."

"What?" Bex asked. Alice laughed and nodded.

"Her name is Connor," Alice said. "And yes, she's Jack's."

"Bloody hell," Bex said as she stole one of Alice's shots and downed it. "Yeah, you're gonna need to catch me up on the last few years."

"Shrimp, perhaps introductions be in order?" Barbossa asked. Bex's face visibly blanched when she saw Barbossa and lowered her gaze.

"Right," Alice said. She nodded to Bex and said, "Bex, you Marty. Those two are Pintel and Ragetti, those other two are Mullroy and Murtogg, and I have a feeling you recognized Captain Barbossa." Bex winced and nodded. "Everyone, this is Bex Beauchamp. Quartermaster of the Damned Raider."

"Former Quartermaster, now, actually," Bex admitted with a grimace. "Captain Mueller finally had enough of me rejecting his advances. My sticking him in the cock with an old rusty nail didn't exactly help the situation. I'll miss that ship, but I certainly won't miss a single soul on that crew." Alice let out a disgusted snort and spat on the ground. Of course, Mueller made unwanted advances. Everyone who knew the man knew that he only ever thought with his prick instead of his head. "I've been doing odd jobs around Tortuga as of late."

"That's a load of shite," Alice muttered.

"You're telling me," Bex snorted in response. "The moment a man finds out you're only interested in women, he treats you like a challenge." She looked around and finally seemed to notice the game they were playing. "Oh! Your coin flipping game! You have room for one more?"

"Always," Alice replied with a large smile. "Flag down some more shots. Barbossa, it's your go."

"Aye," he said. He gave Bex a once over and simply said, "I'm guessing you've slept with Alice, then?"

"Yeah," Bex said simply. "We had a one night stand a few years ago, and we were instantly friends. Tails for me."

"Tails," Alice called.

"Heads," Murtogg said.

"Tails," Mullroy said.

"Heads for me," Pintel said.

"Heads," Marty said.

"Heads," Ragetti said. Barbossa flipped the coin smoothly, and it landed on the table with a resounding 'cling.' Alice groaned and let her head flop back. Of course, it landed on heads. Barbossa let out a laugh and gave Alice a devious smirk as she downed her shot with Bex and Mullroy.

"Stupidest thing ye've done while drunk off yer ass?" Barbossa asked. Alice immediately started cackling loudly as the thought popped into her head.

"Alright, so I don't fully remember exactly what happened, but it involves me stealing a chicken and trying to trade it for a single boot. Not a pair of boots, a single boot. I may or may not have been topless the entire time, and I possibly duelled the owner of the Lusty Maid. The details are a bit fuzzy. Gibbs could probably give you more information if you're so inclined," Alice said.

"I don't actually know what happened with mine, but I woke up completely nude on a dinghy," Mullroy said. "No oars with me either. Luckily I didn't end up too far from shore, but that was a rough time gettin' back to the barracks unnoticed. Murtogg covered my ass on that one."

"Literally," Murtogg added with a snort.

"Let's see," Bex muttered to herself. "I have a lot, actually. There was the time I threw a goat at a prostitute, the time I collapsed an entire inn in Santo Domingo, the time I jumped off this cliff the height of the Pearl..."

"Damn, Bex," Alice said. "I knew about the goat and cliff, but how did you collapse an inn?"

"No idea," Bex replied with a smirk. "I'm told it involved three swords, a bucket, some fishing line, a mallet, and squealing piglet."

"The mallet I can understand," Alice said. "But what did piglet contribute?"

"You're not curious about the fishing line?" Mullroy asked.

"Like I said, I don't exactly remember," Bex replied with a shrug. She nodded at Murtogg and said, "It's your go, right?"

"Aye," Murtogg said as she took the coin from Barbossa's grimy-looking fingers. This turn, Alice and Bex ended up being the only two to call heads while all of the men called tails. Alice and Bex whooped and high-fived when the coin ended up on heads. "Um, alright, closest brush with death?" Immediately, the eyes of everyone except Bex, Murtogg, and Mullroy turned to Barbossa. He let out a loud cackle and simply pulled down his shirt enough to show the deep red, raised gunshot wound directly over his heart. Bex widened her eyes and dropped her jaw at the sight.

"Bloody hell," she said. "How'd you survive that?"

"He didn't," Alice said simply. "And I think that almost everyone here's closest brush with death was either the Maelstrom battle or the journey to Davy Jones' Locker."

"In retrospect, that probably wasn't the smartest question," Murtogg muttered. "I haven't had this much to drink in ages. It's getting to me already." Mullroy didn't even say a word as he took the coin from Murtogg. This turn, Alice, Barbossa, and Bex all called heads while the others called tails. Unfortunately, when Mullroy flipped the coin, it landed on tails. Alice groaned and took her shot with a grimace.

"Alright, the most public place you've shagged someone?" Mullroy asked. Alice laughed and smirked. This was one going to be fun.

"On top of the bar at the Lusty Maid with a girl named Sapphire," Bex replied with a smirk of her own. She let out a whistle at the memory. "Good times. Very good times, indeed."

"Me and Jack on that corner table over there," Alice said, nodded her head at a table that was currently occupied by several men with whores on their laps. "Right in front of Gibbs and Cotton."

"Damn," Barbossa said. "Didn't think ye had that in ye."

"Neither Gibbs nor Cotton would look me in the eye for weeks," Alice said with a chuckle. "What about you, old man?"

"Old man?" he questioned with a scoff. "I'm not that old, lass. It was a postulant on Clare Island. Took 'er on the altar in the middle o' the day. Ironically, she had a habit o' screaming 'Oh God' over an' over." Alice burst into fits of giggles and drank some more of her ale.

"That's amazing," Alice said between her giggles. "I wish I had the balls to do that."

"I thought ye did," Barbossa challenged.

"Nope," Alice said. "I mean, yes, I slept with a nun once, but not in the church." The coin was handed off to Bex who gave Alice a teasing smirk.

"I really hope you miss this one," Bex said.

"Then flip tails," Alice said. "I'm gonna call heads."

"Heads for me as well," Barbossa said. Pintel and Ragetti both called heads as well, while the other three men called tails. Bex flipped the coin with an almost unnecessary flourish of the wrist and laughed loudly once it landed. Tails. Alice shook her head and took her shot.

"Alright, Bex," Alice said. "Bring it on."

"Who was the last person you slept with and where?" she asked.

"Jack on the Pearl while in Davy Jones' Locker," Alice said. "Unfortunately, things are still rough below the belt from childbirth."

"Peggy," Pintel said. "Last night, the Blooming Rose."

"Oh, she's good," Bex said with a smirk drawn across her face.

"Liv," Ragetti said. "A few nights ago upstairs." All eyes turned to Barbossa, who looked lost in thought.

"I can honestly say I don't remember," Barbossa mused. Alice dropped her jaw at that.

"What?" she asked. "How?"

"Well, let's see," Barbossa said. "Cursed for ten years, dead for two, faithfully waiting for me lover for the last year... It's been a good thirteen, maybe fourteen years since I've been with a lass."

"Damn, I didn't even think about that," Alice said. But his words made sense. Hell, she doubted that even she'd remember the name of the last girl she did if it were fourteen years in the past.

"Wasn't it that one lass in Libertatia?" Pintel asked.

"No, no, I think it was the girl in New Providence," Ragetti said. "Red hair,

I think."

"Sounds familiar," Barbossa said. "Not that it's of any importance now. I believe it be your turn, Shrimp."

And with that, the first round of their drinking game was done, and round two was beginning. From that point on, the night started to blur away. She could remember more stupid questions and stories that needed more explanation than what was given at the table. In the end, Murtogg was the first to pass out from how many shot he'd had. The game kept going on for another round without it, though. Bex eventually stumbled away after Mullroy slumped over, probably to find a girl to share her bed with that night. Alice herself was barely sober enough to stand up and get back to the Pearl for the night. It ended up being Barbossa who helped her stagger her way back to the Pearl. She barely even remembered Barbossa helping her up the gangplank and then passing her off to Jack.

All in all, it was a good night for Alice. And she was almost sure that she'd cheered Barbossa up even a smidgeon. Mission accomplished.