Whoo, been a while, hasn't it? Anyway, I'm back, so enjoy this new chapter of Ultimate Romance.
Chapter 8: She-Hulk (Marvel Comics)
"You're a moron, you know that?" the jade giantess growled as she entered the interrogation room of the NYPD, her hair tied up in a bun, her large curvy body contained in a business suit and skirt, a briefcase clutched in her left hand and a scowl etched on her face.
The young man sitting at the table shrugged. "I get that a lot. Mostly from women, actually."
Jennifer Walters, aka She-Hulk, sighed as she sat down across from her 'client' and placed her briefcase on the floor. She then crossed her legs and folded her arms across her monumental chest.
Why me? she thought to herself as she quickly recalled the past three months.
After finally being accepted into the Avengers, not even a week had passed until a massive portal opened in Central Park, releasing a nineteen-year-old boy named Ben Tennyson out into their world, who claimed to be from a different dimension.
After a while chatting with S.H.I.E.L.D. and being examined by all of the greatest scientists in the city (Reed Richards had a field day when he found out), the boy was placed in the custody of the Avengers, as he turned out to be a superhero of his own.
He had gotten along well with most of them, forming friendships with Captain America, Iron Man, Wasp, and even Thor (Ben had been able to lift Mjolnir, a feat that had stunned everyone present). She-Hulk didn't really talk with him much, though he seemed nice and polite enough. Still, he treated her with respect, and always kept eye contact when speaking to her, even though it would be much easier for him to stare at a certain other part of her anatomy that he was eye-level with.
She appreciated that.
So, he had joined the team and proven a valuable member, with his diverse transformations that came from the Omnitrix strapped to his left wrist. And now, after a good amount of time gaining the trust and love of New York, he decided to get in a brawl with a bunch of inebriated morons.
While he looked no worse for wear (he had received extensive training from Steve Rogers, after all), the guys he had beat up were in much worse shape, with numerous bruises and missing teeth being accounted for.
And now, as the team's residential lawyer, she had to clean up the mess.
That made her angry.
"Do the women also threaten to pulverize your face after they pull your ass out of the fire?" she growled.
"No, that's a new one."
"Do they have years of legal experience that could decimate the way you live the rest of your life?"
"Do they possess enough superhuman strength to punch you into the next state?"
"Not that I'm aware of."
She-Hulk narrowed her eyes as she leaned forward, unintentionally giving her teen ally a good look down her top. "Then shut up and listen. Here's what's going to happen, smart guy: You're gonna tell me exactly why you decided to attack half a dozen guys who are twice your size. If I don't like the reason, I will walk out of here and leave you to the sharks. Clear?"
Ben gulped. "Crystal."
"Good. Now, talk."
The teen raised a hand, as if asking his teacher for permission to go to the bathroom.
"What?" she snapped.
"The Omnitrix recorded everything, if that will make it easier," he offered.
Jennifer blinked in surprise. "Huh. Alright, play it."
Nodding, Ben lifted his wrist and messed around with the device for about a minute.
Then, a hologram appeared over the dial, allowing her watch the events that occurred.
She had entered the room angry.
She would leave it smiling.
Ben Tennyson gave a big grin as he looked at the menu. When Captain America praises a restaurant as having the best burgers in New York, you know you have to try one and see for yourself. So, once Ben was sure that the world wasn't going to end by getting himself some dinner, that's exactly what he did.
The place was nice, with a friendly atmosphere, polite waiters, and a mouth-watering smell filling the air.
Yeah, it was safe to say that Ben would frequent this place more often, if for nothing more than how relaxing it was after a hard day's work of being an Avenger.
The waitress, a cute brunette girl named Cindy, kindly took his order, and even complimented his jacket. As an extra bonus, when she offered to add chili and cheese to his side of fries, he knew that he was going to leave this girl an excellent tip.
Of course, the nice atmosphere was now-and-then interrupted by an obviously drunk group of morons a few tables town, but what could you do? It was New York after all, and the Yankees had just beaten the Red Sox. Chances are there were inebriated fans in every restaurant and bar in the city.
Ah, well. As long as they didn't pull anything or hurt anyone, they were completely free to celebrate.
Fifteen minutes later, Ben had just finished his amazing burger (Cap sure was right about them being the best in town!) and some of the best chili cheese fries in this, or any dimension.
All they needed were smoothies...
As the teen smiled to himself (he left a fifty percent tip to Cindy, who had also given him her number and an extra sway in her hips when she walked away), his mood was ruined by the sound of broken glass, a cry of pain, and a very thick Bronx accent screaming obscenities.
Apparently, one of the waitresses had tripped and spilled drinks over one of the drunk morons Ben had taken note of earlier.
His hero complex kicking in, he approached the table as the waitress (it wasn't Cindy, though that didn't make it much better) ran away, tears streaming down her face from the man's cruel choice of words, who was now chewing out other members of the staff who hadn't done anything.
"Problem, gentlemen?" Ben asked as he folded his arms over his chest.
"Screw off, kid," the angry man growled, one of his buddies giving the teen hero the finger.
"Look, it was an accident-" Ben began, though he was cut off by the angry Bronx man getting in his face. The wielder of the Omnitrix could smell the alcohol all over him.
As it looked like the man was about to say something, Cindy walked up, her hands raised in a placating gesture. "Gentlemen, please, there's no need for this."
She turned to the angry New Yorker and gave a charming smile. "How about I take thirty percent off your check, sir?"
After a moment's hesitation, the goon gave a stupid grin. "Bring me another beer, and it's a deal."
Cindy nodded and turned around, about to walk away, when the man did something foolish.
He reached out and slapped her on the rear.
Almost instantaneously, Ben's arm shot out and grabbed the man's wrist in a vice-like grip.
"You should apologize," he snarled dangerously.
Then all hell broke loose.
Jen's eyes were wide with disbelief as the projection ended in a series of violent altercations.
"So, you instigated a fight because a man slapped a waitress on the ass?" she asked neutrally.
Ben gave a sheepish shrug. "Pretty much?"
She-Hulk nodded and stood up, wagging her finger for her fellow Avenger to follow.
"Where are we going?" the teen asked.
"Well, let's see," she began, ticking off on her fingers as she picked up her briefcase. "I've gotta get your case thrown out, those thugs are gonna be doing some time for assault, destruction of property, and sexual harassment, and you're coming back to my place for a shower, because frankly, you smell like beer and salad."
Ben chuckled. "One of them got a good punch in and sent me flying."
Then he realized something. "Wait, I can just go to Avengers mansion and clean up, can't I?"
"My place is closer."
The wielder of the Omnitrix knew better than to argue with the jade giantess, but he was still curious.
"Weren't you about to pulverize me a few minutes ago?" he asked.
She shrugged. "Maybe I have a soft spot for knights in shining armor."
The two shared a slight smile as they exited the interrogation room, a new friendship having been born from the eventful night.
And perhaps, one day, that friendship will be something more.
Eh, not sure about this one. Seemed kinda cliché, but hey, She-Hulk's tricky to write for (never really read much about the character, I'm afraid).
Not sure what I'm gonna do next time. Suggestions, people?