Hello, readers!

I got bored again, and I have no homework. SCORE. so...HAPPY READING!


"…And every bedroom has a bathroom with a working shower…"

Columbia was still showing Eddie around.

"And I room with Magenta, and Frank sleeps alone, and…I have no idea where Riff Raff's room is…"

Eddie seemed nervous as he spoke. "And…where…will I be sleeping…"

Columbia wasn't sure, but she'd assumed Frank would take him…typical.

"Oh, you'll be roomin' with Frankie…he always takes the new people!"

"New people?"

She started giggling.

"You'll figure it out soon enough! Well, I think that's about it. And every day, 'round noon, we meet in the dinin' room for lunch. I guess we still have 'bout an hour or so left!"

They heard someone beating a gong.


She turned. "Aw, shoot! In a second, Magenta!"

Magenta peered at her over the railing of the stairs. "Columbia! Is that MY LIPSTICK?!"


Everyone was sitting down and staring at Eddie when they entered the dining room. Columbia looked down, but analyzed their expressions. Frank was studying him closely…Magenta was smirking, and trying hard not to burst out laughing…and Riff Raff still had on the same, blank look that had been stuck on his face for a long time…

They sat down at the table.

"We'll go…set up all the plates…" said Magenta, holding back giggles. Riff Raff followed her. Everyone could hear them howling in the corridor.

An awkward silence passed between the others at the table.

The siblings returned with a tray that had 5 large plates with tiny portions on them. Some sort of bland-looking bushmeat, and some endive salad or whatever it was on the side. They placed the plates in front of each diner. When everyone was settled, everyone stared at Frank.

He stood up, and proposed a toast, as he did at every meal.

"To our new guest…Eddie!"

"…to Eddie…" the others responded.

They ate in silence…since no one could think of anything to talk about...except Columbia, who desperately wanted to learn about this strange man who would be staying with them until...god knows how long!

Dear diary,

That Eddie is the cutest guy! Sure, he doesn't talk much, but he's still a hottie! He looks just like those biker guys they have pictures of in Fangirl Weekly! I used to think that Frank was the definition of sexy, but now…you know…

What a day! Magenta figured out the lipstick was hers, so now, she's going on the "longest not-talking streak ever". Whatever! She doesn't even use that color anymore! You know how she gets…must be her period or something.

So anyway, lately, Frankie's been obsessing over those pictures in my magazines of men in swimsuits. What does that mean? What crazy idea does he have now? What, is he gonna make himself a man or something? HA! No! He isn't THAT crazy!

Okay, now, back to Eddie! I gave him a tour of the castle today, and he seems like a GREAT listener. He seems to be a really understanding person. And really romantic. He seems like the type of guy who would serenade a girl with "American Pie" or something like that…maybe I'm wrong. I'll just have to wait and see! I'm pretty sure he's sleeping alone…not for long, if you know what I mean!

I spoke too soon…I gotta go…foreplay with Frankie…do I have to? Grrr! See you soon,

Columbia, your owner