Heaven & Earth
Disclaimer: I do not own AHS
A/N: So amongst the many ideas I have for the Lana/Oliver paring, I wanted to try this one and see how it works out. I already worked with little Johnny, so I wanted to work with a little girl next and see how that plays out : ) Hopefully you guys enjoy it.
Chapter 1- Neglected
Lana was awaken by the piercing cries of a child. Her eyes opened slowly to greet the same dull basement ceiling that greeted her every single day. It took her a moment to process where the crying was coming from. She had dozed off so suddenly. Lately, it had seemed as if she barely had any energy to do anything. But it wasn't like she did anything all day anyway. Still, the depression weighed her down heavily, drowning her deeper and deeper in to a black ocean. There was the sound of a door bursting open followed by quick heavy footsteps down stairs and before she knew it a voice was barking her name. Lana's eyes wandered to the source of the sound but she was still dazed from her heavy slumber. She looked up at him confused. His angry brown eyes bore in to her with so much accusation and desperation. And Lana knew what was coming. A good scolding followed by a lecture on parenting. Lana knew she wasn't being a good mother. On the contrary, she had no interest in being a good mother. She held no emotional connection to the child that cried for her. She was but a mere reminder of her shitty reality. And when she looked in to those big innocent brown eyes she felt nothing. Absolutely nothing.
"Lana, are you listening to me?" he ordered. Lana landed her eyes on him. Oliver Thredson. The man who had raped her, impregnated her and now kept her prisoner. In his arms he held the tiny baby girl. Only but a year old. She was quite the beauty with fair skin, chocolate brown hair, big brown eyes adorned with long lush lashes and pink plump lips. But her beauty did nothing for Lana. It didn't even raise an awe. And at that moment the little girl cried in frustration. Her tiny fists flew to her closed eyes in means to comfort herself.
"Lana!" Oliver snapped. The child cried louder.
"What?" Lana answered him.
"Did you not hear her crying?" He demanded. The anger clear in his voice. But Oliver was always angry with her. Ever since the baby was born he could not get Lana to peak interest in the child. For the first days of her life he had to force Lana to feed her. She just had no interest in being a mother. She had completely rejected the child and that alone filled Oliver Thredson with a rage that would make a storm seem like a cup of spilt water.
"No." Lana answered meekly. She sat up and rubbed her temple.
Oliver sighed, "I asked you to watch her while I worked."
Lana didn't answer. She didn't even know why Oliver insisted on her spending time with the girl alone. It had been an entire year and still there was nothing. Oliver closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. His patience was growing thin. No matter how much he forced and begged Lana, he could not get her to show the slightest interest in anything- not even their daughter. It was as if she had given up on life itself. "Lana," he opened his eyes. The storm had calmed if only a little. "Are you listening?"
Lana closed her eyes and mentally rolled them, "Yes, Oliver, I heard you." She had become quite cheeky. But the again she always had a lot of pluck.
"Then why didn't you hear her?" He placed the baby on the bed. The baby crawled to Lana's lap and placed her tiny hands on hers. She looked up at her mother and nestled herself against her desperately trying to find comfort in her arms. "She was crying for you."
Lana sighed softly looking down at the girl, "I dozed off."
"Lana, she could have been hurt." He pressed.
"But she isn't." Lana looked down at the little girl who looked up at her with calm eyes.
Oliver smiled at the little girl, "She adores you, Lana." he said softly.
Lana knew he was right. The little girl was crazy about her even though Lana barely gave her the light of day. And deep down she did feel bad for the child. But the feelings ceased to stop when she looked at her darling face. She had her father's eyes. The eyes of Bloody Face. Lana just couldn't find it in herself to love her. "Well, the damage is done." Oliver said plucking the little girl in to his arms once more. She whined and raised her arms to Lana, "Ah!" she cried.
"I"ll bring her back later and maybe then you could at least attempt to show some interest in her." Oliver said coldly and took the child. The baby girl spun around in his arms, her arms outreached to Lana crying for her all the way up the stairs. He shut the door closed behind them followed by the sound of the lock.
Lana was once again left alone. She pulled her knees to her chest. The heavy chain that hung from her cuffed ankle followed after her. How could she begin to love a child whose father was a monster? Who had been conceived from rape? Lana didn't think she could. She wished Oliver would stop insisting on it. But she also wished he would release her from her prison. There was no reason to keep trying. She had given birth to his child already. She had fed her (against her will) and given her the warmth she needed in her first weeks of life (against her will as well). What did Oliver want now? It had been almost two years since he took her out of Briarcliff. Two very long years. She would even welcome death at the very moment. Perhaps then she could join Wendy and finally find bliss.
Lana sat on the soft white shag rug of the basement floor. Her back was against the bed and her eyes drifted off in to nothing. Noelle was four feet away sitting on a colorful blanket playing with her toys. She grabbed a block in each hand and hit them against one another. She baby babbled to herself; gibberish only she understood. Noelle was beginning to speak a lot. There was so much she was eager to share, specially with her mother.
"Ma ma ma" She said over and over as she hit the blocks against each other again. She then looked to Lana, "Mama!" She called out to her and raised a block in the air. She was fifteen months now and much to Oliver's pride and Lana's horror, her first word had been just that, "Mama".
But Noelle was completely delighted with her new word. It was a name for the person she adored most- next to her father of course. "Dada" followed soon after and Oliver swooned with joy. He picked up his little girl high in the air above him and praised her. Lana was sickened by the scene. But Noelle giggled excitedly as she looked down at her father, her eyes bright with happiness.
"Ma ma ma ma!" Noelle said trying to catch her mother's attention, "Mama!"
Lana snapped out of her trance and looked to the girl. When her eyes landed on her Noelle kicked her chubby toddler legs and giggled in completely delight. She then went back to her blocks. Lana looked from the child to the door on top of the stairs. Oliver was away in his study typing away at his work. Lana was astonished that Oliver (who distrusted her entirely) could trust her with what he adored and cherished most in the world. It would be so easy to grab a pillow and smother the girl. Perhaps upon seeing his child's dead limp body, Oliver would kill her in his rage. Lana often fantasized about it. She would take what he treasured most before she went. It would be the perfect revenge. A final end to the cosmic joke.
Lana's eyes landed back to the child. Noelle looked at her and smiled then continued to play with her blocks. Could she really smother her? It would be so easy, so simple and over in a matter of seconds. But it was the look of utter trust in Noelle's eyes that made Lana hesitate. Of course she did not hesitate to try and end her life when she was still growing inside her. Why was now so different? Because now she was a tiny person with her own personality, thoughts and actions. Because she adored Lana, because she trusted her, because she called her "Mama". She laughed and smiled and was beginning to form words. It made Lana that much more aware of her existence as a person and not a parasite growing inside her. Each passing day she learned something new and adapted to it. And with each passing it made it that much harder.
And Oliver knew that. He knew Lana could not end the life of a child. That's why he left them alone together in the basement. To let Lana squirm in her own hate and desperation. He wanted her to think of him when he was away. He wanted his eyes always watching her so she would not forget for a second. And even though Noelle had his eyes, she held an innocence in them that had been lost in Oliver a long, long time ago.
Noelle carefully stood to her feet and wobbled to Lana. At her last step she fell forth landing on her lap. Lana was surprised and looked down at the little girl who smiled up at her.
"Mama." She cooed and handed her a block.
Lana looked at it for a moment and then took it. Noelle giggled excitedly, happy to share with her mother. She then placed her tiny dimpled hands on Lana's arm and held herself up once more. She took two feeble steps closer and looked down at the other block in her hands. She baby babbled again as if telling her mother what she thought. She then looked in to Lana's eyes and smiled shyly.
But Lana didn't smile at the child, nor responded to her gibberish. She just starred at her trying to ignore the parts of herself she saw in her. Indeed Noelle had her father's eyes but she had her mother's smile. Still, it was a smile Lana had not seen on herself in a very long time. The only time she saw it was on Noelle but she tried to ignore it as much as possible. Noelle baby babbled again and made her way in to Lana's arms nuzzling against her. Lana became rigid at her touch and the night Oliver lay above her flashed before her eyes.
Lana closed her eyes and imagined herself far away in a different life. In a life where her child do not exist. In a life where monsters did not exist.