Author's Note:

Greetings and salutations everyone. So we have come to the end of this fic and believe it or not but Media Player is playing sad music as I write this. I wish to thank everyone who has left reviews and favourited this story and I especially thank those who have been doing so since I first published it, they have been a great encouragement and, in some cases, inspiration for this story. So I hope you enjoy the last chapter and let me know what you thought.

As always I do not own any aspect of Star Trek.

Rule 40-The Command Crew is one of the most dysfunctional families in the universe; anger them at your peril.

It was well known on the Enterprise that many of the ensigns were quite close. They were often the youngest and most inexperienced members of the crew and as such many of the ensigns who had been there awhile would often give any newcomers a helping hand.

One of the engineers had recently been transferred elsewhere and had been replaced with Ensign Rogers; he had been one of the best in his class at the academy and had therefore been considered suitable for a position on the Federation's flagship. There had been many rumours and stories in the academy about the famous Captain Kirk and his crew so Rogers had been very nervous about his placement. He had quickly become friendly with Ensign Harvard, who was also an engineer, and was on his way to join him and a few other Ensigns in one of the recreation rooms.

He arrived at his destination and saw Harvard sitting with several other ensigns; Harvard waved him over, "Hey Rogers, over here!"

He joined them at the table they were sitting round and saw that they seemed to be playing some sort of strategy board game while Harvard introduced him, "Guys this is Ensign Rogers, he's the new engineer."

The others gave him a friendly nod or greeting and Harvard spoke again, "So how was your first shift?"

"Fine, though Mr Scott wasn't what I expected."

Harvard grinned, "Let me guess, they told you at the academy that he was a madman who plays with dangerous experiments and bullies all the engineers."

Rogers nodded and Harvard's grin grew wider, "Don't worry, Scotty only picks on those who have no common sense or think they know better than him and as for the dangerous experiments, he would never willingly endanger the ship or anyone on it."

An ensign with dark hair spoke up, "His experiments have had some interesting results though, like the time he caused two younger versions of himself appear on the ship or when one of his machines de-aged Chekov."

Rogers was surprised, "De-aged?"

"Yeah, he was a child for nearly three weeks and got spoiled rotten by everyone, though he was so cute you couldn't really help it."

A blonde ensign jumped in, "Do you guys remember hearing about the time they were on shore leave and some guys tried to kidnap kid Chekov?"

A third who was an Orion joined the conversation, "Yeah, apparently Spock caught them and knocked them unconscious in less than ten seconds."

Harvard spoke up again, "They deserved it for trying to kidnap Chekov, everybody knows that you don't hurt Chekov if you want to continue living a full life."

"Who's Chekov?"

It had been Rogers who had asked and Harvard answered, "He's the navigator and the youngest on board, you might have heard him referred to as the 'Russian wiz-kid'. He's only eighteen and can work out complex equations faster than an officer twice his age."


"Yup, he's the youngest graduate from the academy in Starfleet history as far as we know."

"He's also the Captain's sort of surrogate son." The dark haired ensign added.


Harvard explained, "Trust me we have difficulty understanding it as well, I mean they're not even ten years apart but they somehow make it work. Pretty much the entire Command Crew is a family."

Rogers was now very confused, "Who's the Command Crew and how are they like a family?"

The other ensigns looked at each other and it was silently agreed that Harvard would be the one to explain the confusing family that was the Command Crew, "Well the Command Crew consists of Captain Kirk, his first officer Commander Spock, Doctor McCoy, Mr Scott, Lieutenant Sulu the helmsman, Lieutenant Uhura who's the head of Communications and finally Ensign Chekov who is the navigator. They are possibly the most dysfunctional family in the universe and you do not mess with them ever. McCoy is very much the grumpy uncle who is actually a big softy, sometimes he is more like their mother especially if any of them are ill or causing trouble and sometimes he is more like Kirk's dad. Scotty is definitely the trouble making uncle who helps the rest of them pull pranks on each other but is more than happy to supply them with serious advice when needed and will protect them with ferocity. Spock is the most sensible and is the serious uncle or older brother that is the one they all can rely on in a crisis. Uhura is the older sister that often tries to keep then in line but is not above pulling pranks herself. Kirk is the middle child that is the worst for causing trouble but will always put his crew first in any situation. Sulu is the younger brother who is often talked into pulling pranks by Kirk and Scotty but is less likely to cause trouble on his own, he is however the one with the most combat training so he's the most dangerous if you annoy him. Pavel is the youngest and Kirk's surrogate son; as such he is the one they are most protective of. He also can get away with pretty much anything since whenever he gives you the puppy eyes you just can't say no to him, this is bad as he can cause more chaos than the rest of them put together when he really puts his mind to it. In short, if you hurt or anger one of them you are very likely to bring the wrath of all of them down on your head."

Harvard finished his explanation and settled back in his seat as Rogers sat there comprehending what he had been told, the new ensign finally spoke, "Basically you're saying that it's very complicated and I'll most likely never understand it but if I should keep it in mind if I don't want to make my time here hell?"

Harvard nodded, "Pretty much."

There was a short silence until Rogers broke it, "So what game are you playing then?"

To save explaining the Command Crew to every new crewmember it was decided that they should add Rule 40 and it was the rule that everyone had know off by heart.

PS-So there we go, this fic is now finished. I don't plan to add to this but I'm not going to disappear so keep an eye out for a new fic from me and please let me know if you have any suggestions.

I hoped you liked 'Unofficial Rules of the Enterprise' and I hope to see you soon.