A/N: Ok, hello folks! This is my first fanfic and my first language isn't english, so please, be nice to meh ~
Disclaimer: South park = not mine
Little squeak welcomed me to my room. Carelessly I threw my back bag to the floor. Since I were too slow with my actions, squeaks get louder and little rodent rose to it back legs and started gnaw the bars of his cage. I kneeled in front of the cage and opened the door, so I could place the bowl of apple slices inside.
It was part of my routine. My routine that I called live. It was simple, just the way I liked. I waked up, school, time with those bastards I called my friends, home, Stripe, Red Racers - or some other entertainment - and sleep.
That was it. Mostly. I didn't mind, thought. I sort liked my live. Of course there was somethings that sucked. But hey, you don't have problems if you don't make things become ones.
But, really, I think I sort of have one problem. I was in love.
I can say, that I don't know thing about love, about that, oh, so dearly desired thing. I can honestly say, that I never have been in love. Yes, sure I have find someone attractive, but that's it. And I never actually have dated anyone, since I didn't find any motives to do so.
Though I didn't know thing about love, I wasn't stupid. And even if I never have experienced that feeling before, I could make different between love and crush. Or love and messed up teenage hormones.
So I dared to say, that yes, I was in love. And yes, I was admitting it.
Thought I didn't like the situation, I admit it. I didn't see any reasons to try lie to myself -
that was one of the few things that I didn't do, lie to myself. I mean, I can lie my friends, my parents, you, polices, teachers and whoever I please, but I won't make this thing more dramatic by lying myself. I weren't enough stupid to buy that anyways.
Still, this little problem-thing-what-ever was pretty fucked up.
The whole thing wouldn't be so fucked up if my desires were directed for a girl. Hell, even that it wasn't my best friend would be good.
It was Tweek who had wriggle through my emotionless barriers.
The twitchy blond had somehow woke up my otherwise cold heart. And I could only wonder how.
It started simply. Passing, quick thoughts about the blond. That how cute he looked one day and how nice would be go somewhere with him. It didn't seem like anything special at all. I just find it more appealing to spend time with him.
I did find myself pick him be my partner in school projects, though he sucked most of them - it was too much pressure, I assume. We did hang out more often, I had got him come over to my place, believe me, wasn't easy task - he were afraid, that I really have a killer guinea pig, or something like that.
Eventually, Tweek seemed to become my best friend. I didn't see anything special about it - I like spending time with him and all. That was until someone freaked Tweek out in middle of class - I think it was something about dinosaurs coming back live and eating us - and the blond did leap on my lap, clung to my clothes and screamed me to safe him.
The feeling I got left me dumbfounded. It's difficult to explain. I know that many people say, it's something like warm and fuzzy, so lets settle with that. I also got that feeling of pride - Tweek did trust me enough to let me protect him. And not to forgot, I can't deny, that I liked how his body did feel against mine.
Other days, I noticed, that I was actually staring Tweek. There was just something fascinating about him. The way he did twitch or how he pressed his lips on his thermos. How his hairs were really funny shade of bright blond. Or how I spent whole class to wonder, what was color of his eyes called.
Still, that didn't got fully my head up. I let it pass - it was just something about growing up and hormones. Something passing.
That what really did wake me up was what Clyde said.
" Really, Craig, you act like an overprotective boyfriend!"
Since Tweek aren't very popular with other kids and got easily picked, I had took some role as his protector. It weren't anything dramatic, really. I just find myself standing beside him and sending glares for those, who dared to look him wrong way. I even defended him against nasty comments or remarks. I really find myself following Tweek like a guardian dog - or something.
But that time, I snapped at Clyde - like an angry bitch, if you must know. It wasn't like he really were bullying Tweek or anything, just throwing some sassy comments about Tweek. Nothing he weren't said before.
And my anger really got my friend out of guard. And I could say, I was surprised myself.
And that, so simply sentence got my head up. I really started wonder my behavior and thoughts. At first, I did feel like I was just curious. But then the idea grew more into my head.
Yes, I admit, I was maybe little dull to not notice sooner. But can you really blame me? Like hell I were suppose to know when I weren't anymore in friend zone with my friends?
Okay, maybe I was, but that's not the point.
So, I sort of realised that I was crushing Tweek. After I admitted that, it grew more passionate and not so innocent.
Though it bothered me, I let it be. I didn't see any reasons to do anything. Or I didn't even know what to fo. So I decided to wait it go over. But it didn't.
So, I had I a problem.
I was in love with my best friend.
And I really should be going to his place. I had promised earlier to go help him with his family's coffee shop. Since his parents were going to see some relatives - or some shit like that - he was supposed to keep shop open alone this day. And like he had expressed it, it was way too much pressure. Who knows when the crazy-psycho-murder-rapist-robber might attack, or when the coffee machine would catch on fire and destroy whole city.
Yeah, I really should be going.
When I get into Tweeks family's coffee shop, I was good fifteen minutes late. Tweek was scraping one of the shops corner tables with rag and didn't notice my arrival. Though he was giving nervous glances for the clock and the window, peering outside world.
The coffee shop was pretty empty, only an old couple and middle-aged woman reading the news paper.
So I decided I could make a little scene. I couldn't resist opportunity like that.
I sneaked behind Tweek and threw my arms around his shoulders. I did make sure, that my grip was enough strong to held him down, not letting him jump on the tables or run away, but gentle enough to not hurt him.
Like assumed, he leaped forward and shrieked like I was going to cut his neck. I kept my grip and pulled him against me, making sure he didn't have chance hurt him self in his panic. I couldn't help but let out a little laughter.
" Oh, Jesus! Ack! Craig! Don't do that!" he squealed loudly, recognizing my voice. I let him go, grinning like mad man.
" Gah! I thought you were some rapist", Tweek wailed and clenched his fists around that poor cleaning rag. I just snorted.
" Yeah, yeah. Sorry I'm late. I had some shit to do", I explained waving it off and offering Tweek apologetic smile. Tweek blinked couple off times and shrugged.
" I-i-it's ok. If you are s-still gonna help, we should get you a-apron", Tweek suggested timidly. I was about to protest, but then I noticed that Tweek were wearing puke green apron with Tweek Bros printed in front of it himself. So I let it go and let Tweek grab my hand and lead me to the backroom.
At the way, I flipped that old couple off, since they were gaping at us. Haven't they never seen two boys hold hands? It wasn't like we were making out or molesting each other.
No, I weren't that lucky.
Tweek let out little 'Gah' and pulled me to the backroom. That did make the old couple make hilarious faces, wich keep inside shock, disgust and totally horror. That old hag's imagine was probably running little wild, I guess.I flipped them off again and winked. And I was quite sure, that the hag had turned little greenish.
First hour did go slow. There weren't many customers and coffeehouse had warm, almost drowsy atmosphere.
That meant I had time today dream. As I cleaned tables with lousy motion, I stared Tweek. He was sitting on high bar stool, trying to hold still. Warm light of café made his hair get golden glow. His eyes wandered restlessly around the coffee-house, but never even glanced at my way. Shame, really. He had very beautiful eyes - yes, I really did just say that, lame, I know. But his eyes were just simply magnetic. They were otherwise green, but the center, just around his pupils, were light honey brown. And they were huge. And he had very long eyelashes.
I followed his hands with my gaze when he picked his coffee mug up and did bring it to his lips. They parted slightly as he took little sip of his coffee, letting them curve into blissful smile.
I let my eyes wander more on Tweek's body. He looked clearly like a boy, thought he was way too thin and small. But somehow I found it attractive. He didn't really have much muscles since it was too much pressure and too risky to do any sports - he hated them. He also got a very long legs, at least compared to his body. And if someone asked me, his hips were little bit curvy, slightly feminine.
I was roughly pulled up from my day dreams when bunch of boys stepped in. They were very fell known boys and my dear school mates. Let me introduce, Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny.
Tweek squeaked little welcome and straightened him self behind the counter. He get back polite Hi from most of the boys. I did just go back scrubbing the tables, not bothering give attention for my fellow class mates.
Sadly, Kenny decided be social today.
" Hi Craig-man!" he created me and left his friend to make the order. I grunted something enough close to Hi to him.
" Are you working here?" he asked curiously, peering my fabulous apron.
" No, I'm just helping Tweek today", I told him, voice lacking life. Kenny seemed little unhappy with my lack of interest and pulled his face into pout.
Like all of us, Kenny had chanced in these years - not much, I must add. He had stopped wearing his hood all the time after fifth or sixth grade when teachers had but up a no-hats-or-hoods-inside rule. But orange still seemed to be close to his heart. I can't surely say, if that perverted kid never have been innocent, but I can tell you, that now he certainly isn't. Girls seemed to like his blond-hair-blue-eyes combo.
Kennys pout didn't last long and soon wicked smile spreaded over his face. And I knew, that nothing good comes when he smiles like that.
" So our lil' Tweekers promised you some alone time after his shift? You have some fancy plans?" Kenny asked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively and wrapping his arms around my shoulders overly friendly.
" No", I just said plainly, trying to avoid attention. Kenny didn't take that as an answer.
" Oh come on Craigy! Why won't you tell me some yummy details 'bout your and Tweek's hot gay sex!" he wailed loudly, making sure everyone in the coffeehouse heard.
Stan, Kyle and Cartman did turn around, their fresh cups of coffee in hand. Tweek let out a loud Eek! and did almost drop his own coffee. Corner table's lady didn't react at all, but that old couple did turn stare me and Kenny with sorrowful expression.
And the worst thing was that, my face started heating up slightly. And blushing was something that I didn't do. Ever.
And surely Kenny saw that and reached to pinch my cheek.
"Aww! Man you are blushing!"
I grunted and swatted his hand of, " No, I'm not."
"Yes you are!" he grinned and turned towards his friends, " Hey dudes, Craig is blushing!"
I rolled my eyes, trying to keep my cool - it wasn't easy with burning cheeks. I could feel all off them staring at me.
" Well, it sorta looks like he is blushing", Kyle let me know and took sip of his coffee. Great, now I really were blushing.
" Get off on my face", I swatted Kenny off. He made heart broke expression, but I just glared him.
" Gome on! Craig! We are like best friend or something! You can't keep things like that from me! I have the right to know!" Kenny whined as I shoved his coffee order to his hands and guided him towards the door.
Rest of Stan's gang followed behind, finding this situation extreme hilarious.
They all were quite same, not changing that much. thought that no-hats-or-hood-inside- rule had also chanced effect them. They all had gained some height and side, like all teenaged did. They all were just quite normal looking, expect maybe Kyle's wild red curls - though when you spent like six - seven? - years in same school with someone, you get quite used to them.
Very soon after Kenny and other guys had leave the little coffee-shop did fill up with customers. When people's work days ended, they all seemed to crave coffee. So, there ended my lazy work shift. Since ervery-fucking-one wanted service at same time, I ended up running between the tables, serving grumpy businessmen and nagging hags. And not to forgot, when café filled up, Tweek's pressure meter got up with steady pace.
When the day was finally over, I was exhausted and Tweek was on the verge of insanity. I couldn't remember last time I had actually done something this tiresome.
" Finally it's over!" Tweek let out a breath of relieve and slumbered against the counter - he was so exhausted that he hardly even twitched. I sat next to him and let out a little sound of agreement.
I took of my apron and gave it to Tweek. He took his own apron of and placed the ugly green fabrics to the back room.
" Do you - mmh.. - wanna coffee?" Tweek asked peering his empty coffee mug.
" Yeah, sure", I said. I normally didn't drink coffee, but now I probably wouldn't make it home without little extra energy.
" Put there some shit so it doesn't taste like crap", I exclaimed. Tweek nodded jerkily, knowing exactly what I meant. Since I didn't know shit about coffee, I just let him to put there what ever makes it taste good.
Tweek got me paper cup, full of coffee that smelled more like chocolate and vanilla. Tweek just did fill his thermos and sat the back next to me.
" T-thanks, Craig", Tweek said, stammering little, " for helping me, I mean. I-it would ha-have been way too much pressure to be alone whole day."
" Any times", I swatted it off, not really wanting to deal with praises. At least not Tweek's. I got that air-headed, lovesick feeling if he did. You know, that stupid, utterly bliss like feeling wich make you soar - or some shit like that.
And in another way, hated it. It was just something complete not me to be like that. And I certainly didn't want to look like a fool in front of Tweek.
We sat moment in silence. Tweek seemed to be little bothered by it, but I didn't mind. I weren't exactly the most talkative person in the earth. But since Tweek seemed extremely bothered by silence, I decided to save him.
" What you are gonna do this weekend?" I asked, taking sip of my coffee.
" Ack! No-nothing, I guess", he answered, twitching slightly.
" Cool, wanna hang out?" I asked, thought Tweek never said no to me. It was either that Tweek really liked spent time with me or that he really didn't have anything else to do.
" S-sure. That will get my parents o-off my back for a moment", Tweek said, giving me shaky smile.
" Wadda ya mean?" I asked, slightly curious. It wasn't often when Tweek complained about, well, anything.
" I... - well, just th-that they think I should got a h-hobby", Tweek explained, twitching furiously. Whole topic seemed extreme stressful for him.
" Why?" I asked, trying not cause too much pressure for him.
" It's too much pressure!" he wailed, clinging his hand to his hairs. I furrowed and reached to grab his wrist.
" Don't bull your hairs" I told him, and waited him to let his hairs go. Slowly Tweek erased his grip and took a deep breath. I let his wrist go.
" So, why they think you should get a hobby?" I repeated my question.
" Th-they think i-it would calm m-me. Li-like ha-have a so-something else on my m-mind, or som-something like th-that", Tweek explained shakily, taking a big gulp of coffee.
Well, it would make sense if Tweek wouldn't get stressed so easily. And I sort of doubted that anything at all would fill Tweek's mind enough to calm him down.
" So what's the problem? Pick up some easy hobby and that's it", I suggested and shrugged. I tried to make Tweek believe that it wasn't big deal. That would calm him down little.
" It's not that easy!" he whimpered and lowered his head to the table.
" Well, arts and music isn't that hard, right?" I reasoned. It wouldn't really be difficult to start play some instrument or visiting occasionally some art club - if there even was ones in this shitty town.
" But I suck at arts and music! My ha-hands sha-shake too much to do either of 'em!" Tweek protested, head pressed firmy against the counter.
" Yeh, true", I admitted, not even trying to embellish.
" Well, I can't think anything else. Start knitting, all I care" I shuddered. Tweek twitched for my way to tell him, that I was out of ideas. He raised his head to only smash it back down.
" Wo-wouldn't my hands sh-shake too much for th-that?" twitchy blond asked peering me behind his long bangs.
" How I'm 'pose to know! I dunno, man. My grandma's hands shake quite much, but she can knit without any problems", I stated, slightly surprised Tweek was considering my not so serious suggestion.
" W-what 'bout the kn-knitting needles? A-aren't they s-sharp?" he asked, twitching little.
" I bet there's round-headed ones", I sighed. Tweek surely can be... - I can't even find word for it.
Thought, that is probably why he is so special to me.
When I finally got home, I just dragged myself to my room and died on my bed. I was tired as hell and my feet were sore. Really, running around café was hard job.
But what I wouldn't do for Tweek.
Ok, maybe there was quite many things that I wouldn't do, but you got the idea.
Since I was so tired, I just kicked my clothes of and crawled under my sheets. I fell asleep almost immediately. Really, sleeping must be one of the best thing I knew.