Hello. You like Prolougue, yes? I hope so.


(*Dan, bound and gagged*)

Me: So, what do you wanna do with him?"

Sinead: Me? This was your plan Looney Tunes.

Me: Well yeah, but I'm not inconsiderate. If you wanna, you know, draw on his face or something, I'd be cool with that.

Sinead: (*Stares at me*) You sick, sick child.

Me: Ian said the same this when I showed Dan the vid of him and Amy.

Sinead: The closet one?

Me: Yup. (*long pause*) So, you sure you don't wanna do anything? I mean, you did agree to help me kidnap him just so he could do my disclaimer, so, I mean, I'd thin you wanted something.

Sinead: The joy of watching him suffer is enough for me.

Me: (*shrugs*) Cool. Ready?

Sinead: Sure.

Me: (*Rips off gag*)

Dan: Aaaarrrggghhh! Goodness woman, what the crap is wrong with you?

Me: A lot. I could email you a list, but first, can you do my disclaimer?

Dan: Fine! SlayGal owns nothing. Now let me go!

Me and Sinead: (*turn to each other*)

Me: Wanna go catch a movie?

Sinead: (*shrugs*) Why not? Thor's out.

(Me and Sinead walk away)

Dan: Wait! Guys? Guys! No! Sinead! Wait! He-help me! Amy?! Hamilton?! Jonah?! For goodness sake, somebody HEEEEEEEE- (*door slams*)

Chapter 1

Amy was thinking. Not uncommon, but hopefully, something that would let her have a bit of peace in her hectic world. Impossible, she thought as she looked at the man lying next to her. Jake Rosenbloom. He was sweet enough, sensible, knew right from wrong, but there was something missing. She got that feeling she always did before the sun had fully risen, that overwhelming rush of love, though maybe not for the person she shared the sheets with. Then Jake woke up, or daylight would creep innocently into the room and chase away any of her darkly dangerous thoughts and feelings, like a child distracting their mum from taxwork, just for a bit.

She heard a groan beside her and let out a small sigh of her own. It was that time again. Time for plastered on smiles and unfortunate lies. She just didn't really know it.

"Morning Ames."

She was about to kiss him hello when her phone went off.

"Sorry," she murmured against his mouth.

The text read something about a mission for the Cahills.

"What's wrong?"

Jake knew that look all too well. It was Amy's troubled look.

"It's… an assignment. For the Cahills."

"Well then, let's go."

"No, Jake, I've umm… I've got to go this one alone."

"And why would that be?"

Amy stood and slipped jeans and an oversized tank-top over her small frame as she replied, "Because it's a –oh!- delicate operation. Ow!"

"You alright over there?"


Amy stood up, fully dressed, boots on.

"Okay, so, what's the real reason?"

"It's a… diplomatic mission."


Amy settled herself on the bed, cuddled up to him.


"And you don't want me going along because…"

"Well, I know you don't get along with Ian, so…"

"Whoa, whoa, time out. Ian? As in Ian Kabra?"

"Yeah Jake, as in British bad-boy Ian Kabra, as you so fondly refer to him as."

"No way I'm letting you go out on a mission with just you and him."

"And why would that be?"


"Exactly. Look, he's handling the part where you actually talk, and I'll handle the part where I'm the Cavalry if shit hits the fan. Plus, he'll stop me from punching anyone in the face. I need him Jake."

"Oh, you need him."

"Don't start with me."

"How can I not? I know you were interested in this guy at one point Amy, don't even try to deny it."

"Key words being had and at one point. But not at this one. Jake… I love you."

Lie number one.

"I only love you."

Lie number two.

"I don't want to love anyone but you."

Lie number three. Lies, lies, lies.

She just didn't know it yet.