Disclaimer: I own nothing :)
Summary: Face and Murdock go over a possible first impression the latter could have made on BA, and a just-for-fun self-challenge to use nothing but dialogue because I've never tried that before lol.
Warnings: Drunken over-affection; not intended as slash.
Reviews and any constructive criticism would be most gratefully received. Thank you for reading :)
"Sit down would you, Murdock? I'm getting whiplash watching you pace here. Failing that: fume, pace or finish your sandwich, it'd be great if you could pick one to focus on at a time. You'll get indigestion at this rate."
"I didn't do it on purpose, Face. I mean, if I'd have known there was a great big glob of mustard on that bit I never would have tossed it for Billy; he hates mustard. And I apologised."
"I know you didn't. BA just lacks perspective on these things; you know how seriously he takes his interior furnishings. And I'm not sure 'oops, oh crap' counts as an apology, strictly speaking that is."
"He'll never let me eat a ham sandwich in that van again."
"I'm sure if you just give him some time and maybe try apologising in a more conventional way he'll cool off and then who knows? We might even be able to make it through a light snack without an emergency stop and roadside eviction while we wait for the cleaning fluid fumes to thin out enough so our eyes don't burn out of our sockets. Really, why can't we stop to stretch our legs like normal people?"
"It's no good, we were just never meant to get along. You heard him; everything about me annoys him. He'd be happier if I stayed in the VA and away from him."
"Come on, Murdock, we're all on edge after the case and an eight hour drive is all; you know BA doesn't think that deep down. He just lost his temper and said some stuff he doesn't mean which you normally wouldn't take seriously."
"I'm not so sure this time. He sounded pretty resolute."
"BA does not want to get rid of you."
"Yes he does, always has from the start. First time we met in 'Nam he tried to strangle me! Not so much as a warning growl, he just went for my throat the moment he clapped eyes on me."
"Technically that was the second time you met him, and given what happened the first time his reaction wasn't that unexpected, don't you think?"
"Very funny, but I didn't have such a big problem with intermittent memory loss back then. Least, not that I remember."
"Okay, okay, he overreacted back then but you have to admit he wasn't entirely unjustified."
"Face, I have no idea what you're talking about. What are you talking about?"
"Seriously, you really don't remember that? I always thought it was just an unspoken rule that none of us ever mentioned it again. You met him earlier when he first shipped in to the unit, just before Anderson requisitioned you for that two-week mission."
"Really? I don't remember seeing him before the strangling thing and he's not exactly the easily forgettable type."
"Yes, well, you were kind of drunk at the time."
"Ah ha; off your face three sheets to the wind belting out show tunes plastered."
"Face, belting out show tunes is normal for me."
"Not three mixed up at the same time."
"Okay, fair point. That explains why I don't remember I guess. But I don't get it; I never used to drink that much, not after... I never used to drink in case I suddenly needed to fly an emergency out of the blue."
"That was kinda my fault. Now don't get mad, it was the Colonel's orders!"
"You? You got me drunk?"
"Hannibal ordered me to – said you needed to let loose and unwind just for one night or you'd go bonkers."
"Well that worked out well in the long run, huh?"
"I didn't hear about why you didn't drink until later. I just... you looked like you could really do with blowing off some stress and I thought I was helping. I'm sorry."
"Aw hec, don't matter much now any way so you can quit with the puppy dog eyes; that's my routine and I'm better at it. So, anyway... I didn't do anything to BA to deserve being strangled, did I?"
"Oh Lord, I didn't go off at him, did I? I'm not normally an angry drunk – just usually get all happy and affectionate. No wonder he had it in for me if I yelled at him for no reason."
"Ah, no, you didn't yell at him."
"Phew! Wait, I didn't cuss at him did I?"
"Not quite. You kissed him."
"Yup. We were walking back from the bar, and I pointed him out to you as the new guy. You walked right up to him, declared he was the cutest little rhinoceros you ever did see then you told him welcome to the A-Team and kissed him straight on the mouth."
"Oh boy. I am never drinking again. You're not putting me on, are you? Please tell me you're joking."
"Scary thing is it does sound like something I'd do after having a few. I can't believe I kissed BA."
"There was no tongue if that's any consolation."
"It isn't! Stop smirking, this isn't funny, and it's your fault too. Face, don't ever get me drunk again, I'd really rather go bonkers."
"Believe me, it's not gonna happen. I had to carry you back to your cot after that – it was a long way and you're heavier than you look. I'm not opening that Pandora's box again, Hannibal's orders or not!"
"Carry me... oh. Oh! Well I guess that clears up that other little mystery too then."
"Always did wonder about the time I woke up with a busted nose and two black eyes for no apparent reason at all. I take it BA politely declined my advances?"
"He always did have such a way with words. I'm surprised my nose isn't crooked."
"I set it for you while you were out right after. Hang on, you mean you woke up like that and didn't think to ask anyone about it?"
"I figured it was an alien abduction. Wouldn't be the first time that happened to me, let me tell you, and those little green guys aren't always too gentle."
"Hmm... Looking back on it, I think that's probably the only time he's ever actually punched my lights out..."
"That's the thing about BA; he'll take a swing at just about anyone, but he pulls his punches on his friends. Though, I have to admit I had my doubts back in Bad Rock for a while there."
"Yeah... you know, I think I'll go apologise after all."
"Good idea; I'm sure he'll be happy to kiss and make up- HEY! Now that was uncalled for! Do you have any idea how hard it is to get mustard stains off a silk tie?"