Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek or Sherlock. If I did my ships would be cannon.
A Study in Star Trek
In which the characters of Star Trek take over Sherlock
"Okay, why do you get to be Sherlock?" Jim sulked from the couch. "After all, I'm the Captain of the ship, so I should totally get to be him."
"That would be illogical, Jim." Spock looked up from his experiment in the kitchen. "You do not have the observational skills or logic that is needed for the role of Sherlock. You are also too emotional. As you have mentioned, you are a Captain, which is the rank that Dr. Watson had in the army, so it is only logical that you take the role of John."
If anything, Jim only sulked even more. Spock decided that it would be better to ignore him and return to his experiment.
Due to a mishap with the transporter (Why was it always the transporter?), somehow they were trapped in the world that seemed to be a parody of Sherlock from the early 21st Century that incorporated elements of their own universe. Spock had deduced their roles immediately, and they had to act like they were these people. Other members of the crew were also there apparently, but they had only encountered one other; they had yet to leave their shared apartment in San Francisco because there was no case.
Until then, Spock and Jim seemed to be stuck in their shared apartment on Enterprise Street with their kind landlord.
"Keptin! Meester Spock! I hawe made cookies!" Chekov came into the apartment bearing a tray of cookies. He was the only member of the crew that they had seen so far and that was because he was apparently their Mrs. Hudson. "I hope you like zem. After all, cookies were inwented en Russia!"
"Oh, thank God for you, Chekov!" Jim cheered up at the sight of the cookies and happily took one. From where he was working on his experiment, Spock felt the urge to roll his eyes but managed to ignore the human impulse.
"Just remember: I am your landlord, not your housekeeper." Chekov said firmly, but since he was so adorable neither person could take that seriously. Chekov didn't notice this and after setting his tray down, he went back down to his apartment on the first floor.
"Anyway," Jim was in a much better mood after eating cookies like any normal person, "I guess we just wait here for a case to pop up?"
Spock leaned up from his experiment. "It appears we will not have to wait long."
Jim gave him a quizzical look before he heard the front door bang against the downstairs wall.
"Hey! Hobgoblin! Jim!" McCoy burst into the room after pounding his way up the stairs. "I've got a case for you two hyped-up action junkies!"
"Bones!" Jim threw himself on his other best friend. "So who are you?"
"Obviously, he has the role of Detective Inspector Lestrade." Spock said as he walked over to get his Sexy Coat™ that every consulting detective needed to have. "There has obviously been a murder, somewhere near the bay in a dilapidated house. This murder is not the first one that has been killed in this manner, which is why he obviously needs our help."
The two humans stared at him. "How the hell did you guess that?!" McCoy shouted.
"Vulcans do not guess. I observed. In the show, Lestrade only came for assistance when the cases were numerous or unusual. Also, you have mud on your shoes that has the soil from the bay area and splinters along the edges of your clothes that obviously come from a house that is not in the best state. Please give the address quickly because most likely we will have to solve this case before the transporter starts working again." Spock finished putting on his coat and handed Jim his own. "Well, shall we, Detective?" Spock raised an eyebrow at McCoy who was still staring at him.
The doctor's face turned red. "Dammit! I'm a doctor, not a detective!" He told them the address and proceeded to grumble his way back to his car to drive to the crime scene.
"Chekov! We've got a case, so mind the store!" Jim called as they left and Spock flagged a taxi.
Once inside said taxi, Spock turned to Jim. "Captain, I believe we will now encounter more familiar faces. If this is indeed some parody of Sherlock, we will probably encounter more characters than in the conventional episode to fit in more of our crew and friends. Also, did you bring your gun? We might need it."
"Yeah, I got it, Spock." Jim rolled his eyes. "So, if you're Sherlock, then who's Moriarty?"
"I have a theory, but there is no certain proof yet." Spock replied as they arrived at the crime scene.
"I thought Vulcans didn't guess." Jim said as he got out.
"They do not. However, as a scientist, it is perfectly normal to form a conjecture and then wait on judgment until all facts are gained." They both ducked under the crime scene tape that Nurse Chapel, or Sergeant Chapel here, held up for them.
"I'm glad to finally see you two." She winked at them both as they walked up to the molding house.
Scotty was leaning up against the doorway, eating a sandwich.
"So who are you?" Jim asked him as Spock brushed past them both and continued to where the corpse was.
"Ah, apparently, Ah'm supposed ta be Anderson, which is really a shame since Ah was told tha' no' one of us was stupid enough ta be him. In exchange fo' being him, Ah get ta eat all the sandwiches I wan'." Scotty grinned and dug back into his sandwich.
"I see, well, good luck with that." Jim said as he finally followed Spock inside.
"Fascinating." Jim jumped in shock as he took in Spock examining the corpse, which looked a lot like Nero. Well, it was hard to tell since the skull appeared to be smushed together. Spock was peering at it closely. "It seems that even the victim is meant to be from our own universe."
"Good God, man. We're standing over a corpse and all you can say is 'fascinating'." McCoy complained.
"If you are expecting an emotional response, I feel I should remind you that I am Vulcan and have no emotions." Spock ignored their disbelieving snorts. "Even if I was human, I would most likely not have a response due to the fact that this victim looks like the Romulan that destroyed my home planet and killed my mother." He looked more closely next to where Nero's hand lay. "Of course, even with his last strength he appeared to still harbor a grudge against me."
He pointed out the S-P-O that Nero had written in his own blood. It was obviously an attempt to frame Spock in a fit of revenge. Of course, Spock had an alibi for when the death was supposed to have occurred.
"In any case, have there been any other deaths like this?" Spock stood up and turned to face McCoy.
"Uh," McCoy flipped through his handy-dandy notebook. "Yeah, we think the other one was Admiral Marcus. If you want to see that one, you'll have to go to the morgue."
"That is the next logical step for this investigation." Spock gave a slight nod and turned to leave.
"Wait! Aren't you supposed to tell me who did it?" McCoy asked.
"It is illogical to make assumptions before knowing all of the facts. I do have a theory, but I need more proof."
"Dammit! You need to give me a bit more than that, you green-blooded hobgoblin!" McCoy ran his hand through his hair in frustration.
"Very well." If Spock was any less Vulcan, he would have sighed. Seriously, he would never be able to tell what went on in these humans' brains. "I think that this is most likely the work of my Moriarty."
"And who's that again?" McCoy asked, his face turning red as his temper rose.
Spock lifted an eyebrow. "I would have thought it was obvious. Come along, Captain." He turned on his heel and walked out his Sexy Coat™ billowing behind him. Jim and McCoy shared a look, but Jim ultimately followed him.
"Why am I even here?" Jim asked as Spock got another taxi to take them to the morgue.
"Watson's role is to watch Holmes' back and to provide praise when he makes deductions." Spock paused. "Captain, seeing as you did not praise me back there, it appears that you are being negligent in your role."
"So unless there's a fight, I'm supposed to stand here and look pretty?" Jim asked incredulously.
"Why couldn't I have been Sherlock?" Jim asked himself again as they got into a taxi and drove to the morgue.
Spock decided that this question was rhetorical and ignored Jim's pouting.
Jim was somewhat surprised as they entered the morgue. "Carol?"
Dr. Carol Marcus looked from where she was examining a corpse with an expression of distaste. "Hello, Jim, Spock."
"Wasn't Molly supposed to be one of those characters that was totally drooling over Sherlock?" Jim looked between the two, now wondering at their relationship. Carol rolled her eyes and Spock looked upward in the Vulcan version of an eyeroll.
"I assure you, Captain, that Dr. Marcus and I have nothing but professional regard for each other." Spock said firmly.
"Right…" Jim said with a bit of suspicion in his voice.
"In any case, I believe you have a corpse for us to look at." Spock continued on, glancing over at the storage units.
"Yeah." She pulled out one of the drawers, revealing a corpse whose head had been smashed in. "It's definitely Dad. Personally, I wasn't expecting to see him again, much less as a corpse." The second "again" was left unspoken but all of them were aware of it.
Spock leaned over and examined the way that the head wound. He gave a slight nod as if it confirmed his suspicions. "Thank you, Dr. Marcus. Now we just have to track down the culprit." With that, he turned and swiftly left the morgue.
For a second, Jim and Carol stood there awkwardly. Then, they shared a glance and Jim sighed as he took off after Spock. "This whole getting left behind thing is really starting to annoy me."
Outside, he saw Spock waiting for him near the street. "So, how are we going to track this guy down?"
"It's simple. We will go ask someone who knows basically everything what he mostly will do." Spock explained. He still made no effort to flag down a taxi.
"And who knows everything?"
Spock raised an eyebrow. "Again. It is very obvious, Jim."
At that moment, a black Non-descript Vehicle™ pulled up to the curb. Out stepped Sulu, who was simultaneously doing something on a cell phone. He looked. "Captain, Commander. If you would please come with me?" He folded himself back into the vehicle.
"Oh my God, Sulu's working for Mycroft." Jim whispered as he and Spock followed their helmsman into the car. The door shut with a click behind them and the car sped off.
Jim wondered who could be playing Mycroft.
All too soon, the car pulled up to another building. Quite frankly, Jim was surprised that it wasn't a suspicious warehouse.
"Follow me." Sulu said, not looking up from his phone, as he led them through the halls into an office.
The group entered a fancy office with books lining the walls. It looked like the sort of room that would belong to a successful lawyer or politician. Jim figured that that probably wasn't too far off since this was supposed to be for the Mycroft equivalent.
In front of them sat a desk with paperwork in neat piles as well as various objects that were typical and gave no indication of who the owner of the office was. Behind the desk was a high back chair that was turned away, hiding its occupant.
Sulu went around to the other side of the desk and took his place almost in the shadows.
"Mr. Spock." A gravelly voice came from behind the chair. It was a voice that Jim recognized and he felt the hair on his arms beginning to rise, because if it was who he thought it was then the universe could potentially end.
To his surprise, Spock gave no indication that anything unusual was going and actually responded with a slight nod of his head. "Mr. Spock."
The chair turned around to reveal that it was, indeed, Spock Prime. The elderly Vulcan looked somewhat unusual in a business suit, but Jim ignored that as a larger matter came to his attention.
"You two know about each other?!" Jim shouted, and he almost visibly started as both Spocks simultaneously raised an eyebrow at him. He whirled towards Spock Prime. "You lied to me?!"
"I did not lie. I… implied." Spock Prime answered, giving basically the same explanation he had once given his counterpart.
"Apparently, it is a tactic he learned from your counterpart." Spock gave Jim a significant look at this.
Jim spluttered a bit, trying to come up with an argument. However, it was hard to beat Spock in a verbal sparring match when there was only one of him. There was no way that he was winning against two Spocks.
Both Spocks decided to ignore Jim and proceeded with the conversation. "Is my hypothesis correct?" Spock asked.
"Indeed." Spock Prime replied. "However, even with the influence I possess in this subuniverse, I cannot locate him. There is someone who does." He turned to his aide. "Mr. Sulu, please inform the driver to take them to that location."
"Yes, Sir." Sulu never looked up from his phone.
"Wait, then why did you bring us here first instead of just having us go wherever?" Jim asked, finally regaining his ability to string a sentence together.
Both of the Spocks raised an eyebrow at this. "Obligatory visit, Jim," they said at the exact same time.
Jim somehow found that creepy and after saying goodbye to the elder Vulcan, he was glad as Sulu led them back to the car.
"You know, you two get along a lot better than Mycroft and Sherlock." Jim commented.
"As Vulcans, we do not have emotions such as resentment between us and can also logically understand the benefits of 'keeping in touch' as you humans would say. We are the same person, yet at the same time completely different people due to different choices and circumstances. In any case, despite the fact that I find my other self highly manipulative, I will work with him if I must." Spock explained.
Maybe the relationship between the two wasn't as different from the Holmes brothers as Jim originally thought. Jim thought about pointing this out but Spock had the "This subject is now closed" look on his face, so Jim dropped it. Luckily, he didn't notice Sulu snickering in his seat.
The silence in the car bothered Jim, but luckily he didn't have to endure it long as the car pulled up to another curb.
"Here is the address, Sir. Good luck." Sulu had a slight smile on his face as the door closed behind the pair.
Jim watched the car as it rejoined the traffic. "What was so interesting about his phone?" He wondered aloud.
"I believe he was in the middle of a text conversation with Ensign Chekov." Spock said as he approached the door that was written on the slip of paper Sulu had given him.
"What? How long has Chekov known where he was?" Jim asked.
"Given the resources Lieutenant Sulu has at his disposal as my other self's aide and Ensign Chekov's own preoccupation with his cell phone, most likely since the beginning of this incident." Spock replied.
"Why didn't Chekov tell us?" Jim was a bit put out that his crewmates would keep things like this from him when they were already in an unusual situation.
"To my understanding, they are close friends. Other than that, I must admit that the intricacies of human relationships and their reasoning while in said relationships are beyond me as it requires knowledge about emotions." Spock finished saying this as he knocked on the appropriate door.
"Right, more Vulcans don't have emotions bullshit." Jim muttered to himself, not noticing the quirk of Spock's eyebrow, because he could, of course, hear what Jim was saying.
Gaila opened the door for them. "Hey!" She smiled. "Come on in!" She stepped aside and led them into the living room. "Just wait here, okay?" The Orion walked out of the room.
"Well, this is a snazzy place." Jim looked around the room, noting the various artifacts.
The corner of Spock's mouth turned up. "I am sure you will find this stop… fascinating."
"Yeah, let's just get this over with." Jim rolled his eyes. He heard a sound behind him and turned around to see who they would encounter now. His jaw dropped.
There stood Lieutenant Nyota Uhura completely naked.
Apparently, she was The Woman.
She smirked a bit and reached out a finger to click Jim's mouth shut. Uhura then sauntered over to where Spock was sitting on the couch and folded herself into his lap. "Hello, Spock. I wondered when you would show up."
Spock raised an eyebrow. "Nyota, you seem to be inappropriately attired."
"Maybe. I was a bit wary of playing this role, but the look on Kirk's face was highly satisfying." Uhura smiled.
"Holy shit." Jim was trying to refrain from staring too much. Despite the fact that they had ended their relationship, Spock wasn't showing any discomfort over having his naked ex-girlfriend on his lap. Still, it would have been highly inappropriate for him to stare at one of his best friend's ex-girlfriend, even if at one point he wanted nothing more than to do so.
"Do you have the information I require?" Spock asked, getting right to business.
"Yes." Uhura leaned in and whispered the place in his ear. "You know, with this experience I can see how having contacts on both sides of the law can be useful." She admitted.
"Perhaps." Spock said. "However, normally we have to act as purveyors of the law, so to deal with the other side would be neither morally right nor logical."
"In any case, you two should be running along now. This was the last stop before the finale." Uhura got up and Gaila reentered the room to escort them out.
Jim struggled not to look back as Gaila showed them to the front door and cheerfully waved at them. "Well, I guess I can see what you mean about being fascinating." He said.
"Perhaps for you. It was nothing that I have not seen before." Spock replied as he hailed a new taxi and gave them the final address of their Sherlock role-play.
Jim stared at his friend. He shook his head. "I still don't understand how you two broke up."
"Both of us realized that we preferred each other as friends rather than lovers. Therefore, it was only logical to return our relationship to that status." Spock explained as he entered the taxi.
"Right." Jim said, not actually getting it and feeling as though there was more to it than that. He thought about changing the subject, but Spock pulled out a cell phone and started texting. Jim sighed and looked out the window.
The taxi pulled up outside of a recreation center. The two exited the vehicle and entered the building.
Spock began heading for the pool area, but paused right outside the doors. "Jim, as we are about to encounter a dangerous enemy, perhaps it would be better for you to remain here."
Jim stared at him. "Yeah, not going to happen. What sort of Captain would I be if I stayed behind while letting my First Officer waltz into danger?"
"One that follows regulations." Spock deadpanned.
Jim gave a small snicker at that. "No but seriously, just like Watson and Holmes always dive into danger together, so do Kirk and Spock. Got it."
The corner of Spock's mouth lifted a bit. "Affirmative, Captain."
They entered the pool area and Jim drew the gun that he had stowed. "So, who exactly is our Moriarty?"
Before Spock could answer, a familiar drawl rang out. "I suppose it does not matter what role I play."
Jim's eyes widened as a figure dressed in a sharp suit stepped out of the changing rooms and walked towards them.
"No matter what I do, I will always be better than anyone else." Khan imperiously said.
Jim aimed right between his eyes. "Holy –"
His exclamation was cut off as Spock lunged at Khan and started beating the crap out of him.
Jim stared as his best friend, the Vulcan pacifist, exchanged blows with the superhuman and had the upper hand. Khan ultimately could not keep up with the Vulcan rage, but Spock didn't stop.
"Hey, that's enough." Jim went up and finally stopped Spock by putting a hand on his arm. "Jesus Christ, people told me about how you pulverized him when I was dead, but still." He looked at Khan's broken and bleeding form. "Holy shit."
"I apologize, Captain, but seeing him emotionally compromised me." Spock paused as he straightened up and looked down at his handiwork. "However, when thinking about the Sherlock series, I cannot help but think that had something like this occurred, the protagonists would not have had as much trouble later."
"Yeah, no kidding." Jim hesitantly prodded the superhuman with his foot. "So what now?"
"Holy shit! What did you do?" A Southern accent came from behind them.
Jim turned around to see Bones and company coming through the door with handcuffs and guns.
"I merely took out the threat, Doctor. Or should I say Detective?" Spock raised an eyebrow as McCoy first checked to make sure Khan still had a pulse and then cuffed him.
"Hmph." McCoy snorted. "Whatever. Now that we've got the guy, you two can go home and make out or whatever you're supposed to do."
"What?" Jim blushed. "Why would you think that? We aren't a couple. I'm not even gay!" He turned to Spock, who just raised an eyebrow. "I'm not!"
Chapel rolled her eyes. "You're totally a couple."
"Aye, an' there's exceptions ta ev'ry rule, Captain." Scotty said around the sandwich in his mouth.
"Even if you aren't, everyone ships Johnlock." Chapel commented as she helped her boss drag Khan away. "And that's your current roles. What do you think, sir?" She turned to her superior.
"I think that I don't want to think of my best friend and that pointy-eared bastard in bed and that if I do, then I need some alcohol to help me forget it." McCoy's face wrinkled up into a look of disgust.
"But we're not!" Jim continued to look at his First Officer. "Spock, explain to them that we aren't a couple."
A breathy sigh came from Spock's pocket before the Vulcan could reply. He quickly brought out his cell phone to avoid his Captain's request, though he would never admit that. "Nyota seems to agree with Nurse Chapel." He said after reading the text.
"What you can't do this?! You're avoiding the question!" Jim was about to protest further, but he felt the familiar tingle of the transporter.
"Oh, thank God!" McCoy said, dropping Khan's prone body before disappearing.
One by one, all of the people who had been trapped in this parody of Sherlock returned to their proper places.
And thus, the Sherlock incident came to a close.
And many months and much denial later, Jim finally admitted that yes, he and Spock were really a couple.
Just like John and Sherlock.
AN: So I've been reading Star Trek: 2009 fanfiction lately, and I thought, "Spock would make a great Sherlock." Thus, this fanfic was written from that thought and in celebration of Sherlock coming back.
Also, I usually don't write accents and just say that they have an accent, but I decided to give it a go in this fic. Tell me how I did.