Elysia POV
It was too much to handle. Jake and Allie had snapped out of the kiss, but it was just too much. So I went into the back room. Jake didn't bother following. He knew better- besides, it's not like we're even dating anymore. Maybe this could help me move on- but no matter how hard I try to deny it, something in me had snapped. I missed him. It was painful to watch them kiss. I don't know how to put my emotions into words, but I guess it doesn't even matter anymore. I'm going to be dying in a few days, and none of it will matter. It will be easier for Jake, now, too.I saw an old, beat up, gray sling-over-the-shoulder sack, and I grabbed it, beginning to shove potions and who knows what else into the bag. I wasn't really paying attention- too much stuff was floating inside my head. I eventually felt a hand on my shoulder- that's when I snapped out of my daze and turned around. Jake. Of course it was him. Italics

"Um, are you ok?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked, playing dumb. He gestured to the bag. That's when I saw ropes and strings of close swimming everywhere, tangle in and out of the bag. I wasn't paying attention, and I kind of, um... Overpacked.

"I just have a lot on my mind," I said.

"Look, if this is about the kiss-"

"It's not about the dumb kiss," I cut him off. It wasn't a total lie. I mean, I was going to die in three days time.

"Then what was it about?" He asked. Of course he didn't know. He couldn't possibly know- no one knew. But me. And the Titan. The dumb Titan. But I had to do it. My mother had done so much for me- I couldn't live if she died- especially if it was because of me. And it will be. Somewhere, I knew if I gave myself, he still wouldn't let my mom go. But that was a risk I was willing to take.

Jake stared at me, and I realized I had zoned out.

"Then what IS (caps italics) on your mind?"

I stare at the ground for a minute. I can't tell him... He would try to stop me. But I can't make something up, either. He deserves the truth, but I can't give that to him. I can't lie; that would make it even more unfair. So I don't respond. I just walk out into the main room, where the kiss happened. I almost shudder at the thought, but hold it because Jake Is behind me. So I get down and take everything that won't fit in the book bag, which is quite a lot, and zip it up. We needed to find draco and Allie. They had run off after the kiss. But that could wait until morning. I was tired, hungry, thirsty, and just needed time to rest. So I decided to go sleep on a cloud. Higher up, this time, so I'll be safe. The electric smelling air, I can practically breathe in the humidity of the water, but it doesn't hurt me. Cool mist on my face. The density of the air. I loved it up here. I could look down to see the castle, Jake sitting on the front steps. I can't bear to see the sight of him, so I turn, laying back on the cloud. The dense, humid air makes my eyelids fall heavier, and before I know it, I'm asleep.

I wake up to a voice from below. My eyes jolt open, and I see the sky above me. Expecting to see a bright blue, mixed with streaks of yellow, pink and red, I am instead shown pitch black. The sun hasn't even risen yet, and he was waking me up.

"WHAT THE HECK!" I call down. He is silent for a moment- probably because he's never heard me yell so loud before. I hardly ever do, but when I do, I'm mad. And I've about had it with this life- I can't wait for my death. Two days away. Yay.

After a moment, he speaks, "I couldn't fall asleep. I hoped it was late enough for me to wake you up- we should probably start heading to find Allie and Draco. I want to get there by first sunlight, and who knows how long it'll take to find them?" Jake called up. He had a fair point, but still, a queen like me needed her beauty sleep. I could only hope the best for the couple- I hope they ended up making up, no we would find them huddle together, holding hands. If one relationship didn't work, I wanted the other to. I was happy for them. And besides, she's probably going to need him, after, I, um... Die. Sounds kind of selfish, but we are best friends. If she died,- and Jake and I were still together- I would need him to fall back on. I can only hope she feels the same way. I guess I'll never find out. I can only hope the best for Jake, and that he will find someone new. Someone he deserves, that can treat him better. I'm a grenade, waiting to explode. He needs a stead gun, he can use anytime, steady trigger-fire! BOOM! She's right there when he needs him. That's who he deserves. Not me.

Because I'm a grenade- he throws me, and I explode away from him. I'm only one shot, though. He needs someone he can refill. A gun. Bullet after bullet, she'll be there for him.

Besides- he doesn't like me anymore. He said it himself I'm too much to handle, and I agree.