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jedielfsorcerer PM
Biography
Joined Nov '06

favorite ability\talent\skill for naruto to have:

mokuton -- not enough stories

Renningan == Not enough

seal master-- not enough good ones out there. DO NOT PISS OFF A SEAL MASTER!


"Just when you realize life's a bitch, it has puppies."- Adrienne E. Gusoff

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former"-Albert Einstein

"The reality is that there is only the Force. It is above such petty concepts as positive and negative, black and white, good and evil."

―Darth Sidious

"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody."

Bill Cosby

"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."

-Anonymous

"Few can forsee where their road will lead them till they come to its end" Legolas from Lord Of The Rings, by JRR Tolkien


If you can read this message, you are blessed because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile!


Love vs. Sex

A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit
some friends one
evening
and time passed quickly as each shared
their
various experiences of the past year.

She ended up staying longer than
planned,
and
had to walk home alone. She wasn't
afraid
because it was a small town and she lived
only
a
few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm
trees,
Diane asked God to keep her safe from
harm
and
danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a
short
cut to her house, she decided to take it.

However, halfway down the alley she
noticed
a
man standing at the end as though he
were
waiting
for her.

She became uneasy and began to pray,
asking
for
God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
and
security wrapped round her, she felt as
though
someone was walking with her.

When she reached the end of the alley,
she
walked right past the man and arrived
home
safely.

The following day, she read in the
newspaper
that
a young girl had been raped in the same
alley
just
twenty minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
the
fact
that it could have been her, she began to
weep.

Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
help
this
young woman, she decided to go to the
police
station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so
she
told
them her story.

The police asked her if she would be
willing to
look
at a lineup to see if she could identify
him.

She agreed and immediately pointed out
the
man
she had seen in the alley the night
before.

When the man was told he had been
identified,
he
immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
and
asked if there was anything they could do
for
her.

She asked if they would ask the man one
question.

Diane was curious as to why he had not
attacked
her.

When the policeman asked him, he
answered, "Because she wasn't alone.
She
had
two tall men walking on either side of
her."

Amazingly, whether you believe or not,
you're
never alone. Did you know that 98 of
teenagers
will not stand up for God?

Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly
believe
in
God..

PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you
no matter what...and if you stand up for him he will
stand up for you.

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned

Sometimes one likes foolish people for their folly better than wise people for their wisdom.’ - Elizabeth Gaskell.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.


Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this.


Seventeen things to do at shops

1. Get boxes of extra-small condoms and put them into people's carts when they aren't looking

2. Set all the alarms in House wares to go off at five-minute intervals

3. Make a trail of tomato juice leading to the rest rooms (preferably BEFORE the pissed janitor attempts to clean it up)

4. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a packet of M&M's on lay-by

5. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in House wares"... and see what happens

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' to a carpeted area

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding section

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?!"

9. Look right into the security camera and use as it as a mirror and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are

11. Dart around the store suspiciously humming the 'Mission Impossible' tune

12. In the Auto-Department, practice your 'Madonna' look with different sized funnels

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say, "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the 'foetal position' and scream,” NO! NO! It's those VOICES again!"

15. Go into a fitting room and wait awhile; and then yell -very loudly-, "There's no toilet paper in here!"

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting, "Go, Pikachu, GO!


MANLAW

The male equivalent of the 10 Commandments

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss’s car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into “The Crying Game”.
(e) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you’ve known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy’s fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy’s birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy’s choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who’s playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she’s officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you’re sunning on a tropical beach… and it’s delivered by a topless model and only when it’s free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you’re in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don’t let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man’s fly is down, that’s his problem, you didn’t see anything.

16: Women who claim they “love to watch sports” must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that’s just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you’d better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she’s withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
b) C’mon, give me one more! Harder!
c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly “just a friend” have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you’re feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion occurs about what a big mistake it was.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question “What do you want for Christmas?” with “If you loved me, you’d know what I want!” gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men’s Gymnastics. Ever. We’ve all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below:
“GUTS” is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, “are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?”
“BALLS” is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, “You’re next!”

We hope this clears up any confusion,

The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.


Zen sayings

http:///zensayings.htm


Favorite clips and such

http://www.youtube.com/user/jedielfsorcerer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WhVawbGWjdY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bc1nvKdL4JA&feature=related


I have some challenges on this site and my homepage.

http://forum.fanfiction.net/forum/Challenges/51526/1/0/

CHALLENGE:

I have not seen a Priest raised and trained Naruto. So, here's the idea.

Naruto at a young age, preferably before the ninja academy, Naruto comes across an old priest in a small temple around the Leaf Village. They talk for a while, the priest feeding Naruto food and drink and a place to stay over night. How Naruto got to the small temple is up to you, but make it realistic. What order the priest is, is also up to you. But make it realistic in Naruto verse. They are more Shinto than any other religion out there. What deity the temple is of? That is also up to you. This Naruto will not be a ninja, he will be a priest instead. What abilities\powers\skills\talents Naruto will have? For some ideas in games see WOW\Warcraft and D&D. This Naruto will carry the monk staff thingy. A staff that has rings on the top that makes a noise like a bell when someone walks with them. He will also use the senbon needle thingy too. The Taijutsu style? Something a priest\monk will use. kung fu is one possible style. but kung fu has many styles of its own. Pairings, Naruto\shion.

example of what the priest looks like (mainly the clothes)

http:///NewFiles/KyotoMonk.jpg

and for naruto's clothing (mainly the staff and different color)

http:///inuyasha/miroku.jpg


Rant:

Out of all of the FanFiction that i have read, there is one thing that I hate. And that is MPEG! There is only one answer for this. IT IS FREAKING IMPOSSIBLE FOR MALES TO GET PREGNANT! MALES DO NOT HAVE EGGS, FEMALES HAVE EGGS AND MALES HAVE sperm!


Challenges: Please let me know if you have taken any of my challenges, so that I can post a link to the story.

Challenge 1:

Death Squad

Members:

Naruto, Shikamaru, Shino

Abilities\nicknames:

In the Bingo Books of couple of different countries, the squad is called:

4 Horsemen

Shino: bugs can also carry sickness that can occur faster than nature can. Pestilence\Famine

Shikamaru: Shadows user, can manipulate shadows like his clan, but he takes it few (thousand) steps farther than his clan. He does not need his shadow to touch you. He can manipulate your own shadow at a distance, or any other shadows. Death

Naruto: Naruto takes clones a few steps farther than anyone else. He uses his clones as weapons themselves. Take cannon, and expand on that 1000 fold. Can take down whole armies by himself. War

In sort, the 4 Horsemen.

Pairings: no yaoi\slash, no harems bigger than 3 people in all, no one old enough to be the person's grandparent, no one who already has a kid of the person's age.


My Faith = Jesus
Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...
He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...
He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...
He had no army, yet kings feared him...
He won no military battles, yet he conquered the world...
He committed no crime, yet they crucified him...
He was buried in a tomb, yet He still lives today...
Feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us...
If you believe and God and Jesus Christ is His son...
Then copy and paste this into your profile
If you ignore him, in the Bible, Jesus says..
"If you deny me before man, I will deny you before my father in Heaven..."


Challenge:

Percy Jackson and the Olympians:

Pairings: This is a must\required: Percy Jackson and the Goddess Hestia

Percy and Hestia became friends during Percy's first summer at camp half blood. At the end of that summer, Hestia gave Percy a chalice that had a eternal flames coming out of it. it is used to contact her, and just for talking to her. even just for offerings.

Over the years till after the "Last Olympian", after the titan war, Percy and Hestia started to truly date.

Within 5 years, they marry. . . Percy is at least 18 years old, and Sally Jackson is invited to attend the wedding.

Hi

Dear bullies,

See that girl you just called fat? She is starving herself. You know that girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting on make-up hoping people will like her. That boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home. See that old man you made fun of cause of the ugly scars? He fought for our country. See that young boy you just made fun of for always being sick? He has to walk home in the snow cause his family is too poor. That guy you just made fun of for crying? His mother is dying.

Re-Post this if you are against bullying

Author: Follow Favorite

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