Hello my name is Mr./Mrs. Not Important
Me and my fellow South Africans need your help. We don't want donations or any money we didn't earn. We need everyone's help by spreading the news that South African farmers are being murdered in gruesome ways and farms are being torched for no good reason. This is a national emergency because they provide us with food and work. It has come to our attention that this is not common knowledge outside of South Africa. If you contact us we will try to send you evidence of our state of emergency.
Please help us spread the word.
This is not a prank