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Damien8d PM
Biography
Joined May '20

Hello future readers of this profile! (If I ever manage to post a fanfic on this site that is)

I'm from Germany and the first fanfic I'm most likely going to publish is naturally one in my native language.

It's going to be a Harry Potter AU-prequel with a crossover from some of Stephen Kings works.

I've been influenced by many Hp-fanfictions on this site and Ao3.

Especially the grey or dark-Hp and wbwl ones caught my attention. (if they're well executed)

However I have developed a strict dislike for certain characters which most likely wont be seen in a positive light in my (potential) fanfiction either:

Draco Malfoy first of all!

I cannot understand why so many people like to fawn over a person with so many bad traits.

He grew up with every luxury the wizarding world had to offer while adapting all negative views of his father.

He is a coward, doesn't have a single cunning bone in his body, is superficial, disloyal to his "friends", is angsty, whiny, is the wizarding worlds equivalent to a racist biggot... (this could go on waaaay longer)

If I had to guess why so many people like this guy is either the performance of his actor Tom Felton or they like this forbidden romance aspect of pairing him with the two most unlikely candidates Harry and Hermione "shudder" (btw in Germany its simply Hermine).

Next there is Snape.

He is a bully, someone whose either a racist biggot too or someone who caved in to peer pressure and a loser who couldn't get over the fact that his "love of his life" (more like obsession) rejected him.

He is responsible for the severe lack of wizards and witches who attend to jobs where a NEWT in potions is required (like aurors and medics) as he is a reaaally bad teacher who prefers to instill fear and pressure on his students instead of a healthy learning environment.

This is especially dangerous as potions seem to pose a great danger if there is even one small error made.

Of course there are many more safety hazards he ignores which I do not care to list in its entirety as I will deffinitly miss a good portion of them due to my own lack of knowledge on this matter.

Again I blame Alan Rickman for this characters popularity!

Edit (2022 after reading The Severed Prince by Anis5240 and other Snape pov fics and some research)

He's still a bitter, hypocritical bully but James, Sirius and Lily turned him to the "dark side" imo.

James and Sirius were bullies worse than Draco and Lily was a very bad friend by abandoning years of friendship even after he humiliated himself in order to apologize in front of the portrait.

Heck she didn't even protect him beyond shouting at James when he was attacked out of nowhere and up in the air without any means to protect himself.

No one came to his aid and she even smirked for a second when he was humiliated in front of a huge group of people.

By saying "Mudblood" he either had to keep his cover, was enraged at seeing her smirk while he suffered or simply made an understandable mistake in the heat of the moment.

Afterwards she even called him "Snivellus" and left him alone to be attacked again by James and Sirius.

Finally she dated his bully - a really low blow and probably the final nail in the coffin for Snape to become a DE.

There is no line in the books which confirms that he is a bigot or racist.
There is no line in the book about his life in the Slytherin dorms - which was most likely pretty bad considering he was a poor halfblood with bad hygiene.
There is no line about Snape being the agressor in conlicts between him and the marauders.

On the contrary as even Sirius and Remus confirmed that James still attacked Severus after that fateful day.

His actions as a DE however cannot be excused.

Now theres Dumbledore the great manipulator.

He's either senile and likes to play with the lifes of children for fun, is overworked with his 3 jobs (which makes him very irresponsible) or he is plain evil.

As a headmaster he failed in guaranteeing the safety of his students so many bloody times its not even funny anymore.

The fact that he lets people like Snape, Hagrid, Lockhard, Umbridge, Trelawny and Binns teach is a disgrace.

He led a group of vigilantees who aparently never had a (good) plan and led a good portion of them to unnecessary deaths.

He condemned Harry to a childhood of pain and suffering and he knew everything about it.

The letters, Mrs. Figg, all his protectors (spies)... He knew what he condemned Harry to live through and it played perfectly into his plan as he received a broken boy who would readily sacrifice his life without much of a second thought.

He deliberatly withhold important information on countless occasions which could've either made many peoples lifes way easier and could've saved many more lifes.

If even one tiny thing went wrong than every sacrifice he was willing to put others through would've gone to waste.

He left Harry in the dark, held him weak, put him indirectly through torture (see year 5 with Umbridge and Snape).

He raised him to be the perfect sacrificial lamb who had nothing left to lose.

To sum it up he was a dispicable human beeing who is most likely at least partly responsible for the rise of (at least) 2 dark lords (if Harry snaps after uncovering all of Dumbledore manipulations 3).

I also have a theory on his non-killing policy:

He knew that many pureblood families slowly die out.
To preserve the "pure" magical blood he did everything in his power to keep even criminals and murderers alive.
He was actually a racist bigot in disguise imo as he didn't care about the education of muggleborns (since he didn't buy the medicine from elsewhere in year 2) on the other hand he did everything in his power to keep Draco alive even though he was a safety-hazard while he tried to kill him.
That Katie almost died didn't faze him (most likely because she wasn't a pureblood)
He overlooked all the bullying coming from pureblood-slytherins and to ensure that his image as a muggleborn-friend wasn't tarnished he made Snape do the dirty work.

He was also nepotistic as he didn't punish James and his friends adequatly and made him head boy although he was a known bully and had worse marks than Snape.

(remember they lived in the same village)

Ron

Well he's just a selfish prick and bully who only became Harry's friend because he (conveniently) was his first "friend". (btw Rupert Grint was still fantastic in his role)

Ginny

Well... at first I too was on the love-potion waggon but after reading the 10th fanfiction in that style it just became boring.

I mean it's still possible as even in the books this pairing made no sense whatsoever.

And even if that's not the case she just isn't a very sympathic character.

I still cannot understand why Harry just let all those insults to Fleur slide. (someone who was nothing but friendly towards Harry after the second task)

But I can also not understand Harry's friendship with Ron so maybe it actually does make sense in a very twisted way.

James Potter

He too was a bully who liked to fight 4 on 1 in his favour - Why Lily married such a prick doesn't make sense to me.

There were even some theories in other fanfics that explained this like her marrying him for her own safety or for necessity as a muggleborn on her own would most likely not get far in a pureblood dominated world or him potioning her.

He was a worse bully than Draco and only saved Severus because otherwise Remus would have been thrown in Azkaban or kissed.

Harry Potter and the International Triwizard Tournament by Saliient91 went that way
(btw great fic)

Sirius Black

Love the actor but he too was a bully who put his revenge over the safety of his god-son.
He later tried to redeem himself but as soon as Dumbledore spoke the word he immediately followed his words even though he knew he was wrong in doing so.

A bully almost as bad as James who also tried to kill Severus and didn't even think about the consequences it would have for his friend Remus (see James)

Remus Lupin

Again loved the performance in the movies but in the books he let his friends bully others and he didnt step in.

And where the hell was he before and after Harrys third year?

He even wanted to leave Tonks alone with his unborn child - dick move man!

Tonks like so many other woman in canon had sadly really bad taste.

(canon) Voldemort

(awesome actor) He's wizarding Hitler, a terrorist, sadist, monster - you name it!

Hes evil incarnate.

There is just no logical way a Harry would willingly allign himself or worse be romantically involved with the murderer of his parents.

There are only 2 good ways (that I know of) which would make him sympathetic due to fanfiction.

1.: make him a fighter for muggleborn rights and antagonist to the establishment (represented by Dumbledore) who wants to destroy the biggotry from within

2.: make him fight for the wellbeing of this planet (as he most likely experienced WW2)

For that purpose I would recommend everyone to read one of the best fanfics Ive read: "Departure from the Diary" from Tendrael. (with fem!Riddle from the diary)

(canon) Bellatrix

Awesome actor! However She's a fanatical, sadistic, monster who works for an even bigger monster.

However there are fanfiction versions who give her a background which would explain her insanity.

In those cases she was forced to marry her abusive husband against her will and her only way to gain an ounce of freedom was to get under the wings of Voldemort who saw potential in her as an enforcer.

Then there are fanfics who blame contracts, mind manipulations or rituals for her insanity, so that she actually became a victim.

I'm a big fan of a pairing of her (in a time travel/AU setting) with a competent/dark/grey Harry.

(canon) DEs

They're a bunch of racist terrorists!
Why would I try to redeem them?
Of the bunch I only respect Barty, Snape and Bella solely for their skills.

Molly

Is in my opinion a bad or at the very least overworked mother with racist tendencies and thinks everything Dumbledore says is gospel.

There are several conspiracies about her manipulating the friendship with Ron and the love life with Ginny (and it really seems convincing with all the plotholes) but it's kinda overdone and if so many people use this theory it gets boring really fast.

McG

Awesome actor... however she failed several times in her duty to guarantee the safety of her students, looked away from bullying (did nothing when Harry was being bullied), let Harry grow up in an abusive environment...

Sprout

Condoned a whole house bullying Harry.

Flittwick

Did nothing while Luna was beeing bullied for years.
However he's still the best of the bunch because it seems as though Luna never really went to him to talk about it.
However that still means he elected prefects who let this bullying happen and didn't check on his house on a regular basis - which means he failed in his duty as a head of house.

Fudge/Umbridge and the (canon) ministry

Nothing to redeem there: a corrupt, racist and illogical system build on oppression.

Umbridge is like the most hated female teacher/authority figure times 100 everyone had at some point in their lives and Fudge is the picture of a conservative and corrupt polititian everyone has in their own country.

Rufus Scrimgour on the other hand earned my respect after reading several fanfictions.
He tried to defend his society against an undefeatable foe without taking Dumbledore's bullshit.
That he tried to win Harry over was only logical and if Harry was smart or raised differently he
would've gained a powerful ally in Scrimgour.

The only grain of salt I have with him is that he didn't apparently put Umbridge in Azkaban.
However that could still be explained with the apparent information block Dumbledore created so that no information leaks outside the castle.

No one - not even Fudge would've condoned the torture of minors with those blood quills so I can only suspect that Dumbledore again suceeded in withholding information.
Because if the events of year 1 would've been public knowledge, than Dumbledore could book a vacation in Azkaban.

and finally the Dursleys

They abused him it's as simple as that.
There is no excuse for what they did and there is in my opinion no way to redeem them.
Even if you go with the Horcrux-influence theory it's still no excuse.
They could've given him to an orphanage but they kept him as a household-slave.
And no even Dudley doesn't deserve some kind of redemtion.
Even without Harry he attacked those who couldn't defend themselves.
He was just a big stupid bully.

And I repeat myself: Dumbledore knew! He knew from the very beginning what Harry would have to endure since he left him on their doorstep (without an explanation I might add).
He is just as guilty as them just like every single adult who knew and didnt do shit to stop it.

Some may have questioned Dumbledore but didn't act up on it (like McG) but inaction in the face of injustice while having the power to change the situation for the better is despicable.

And that includes every order member who spied on him.

The only ones I knew for sure to at least try to help him out of this abusive household was Sirius (and look where it got him - forced to rot away in a place which holds memories of his very own abusive past till he was finally out of the way for Dumbledores plans for his martyr)

Now pairings I like in no particular order:

Harry/Hermione: should've been canon (however I've sadly read too much of that pairing to actively seek those out nowadays)
The notion that he feels like a brother to her is ridiculous.

Her and (canon) Harry fit like bread and butter.
Where she is methodical Harry is driven by his gut.
Where she the brains he is the (magical) muscle.
(even if Harry is actually described as smart with him reading books before going to Hogwarts)
Both have experiences living in the muggle world.
Both would die for each other.
Both fight against injustice.

However a dark/grey Harry would most likely clash with Hermione and her willingness to trust authority figures.
On the other hand Hermione also had her dark tendencies...
And even that would be better than her apparent masochistic desire to be with Ron.
They have nothing in common.
He bullied her, ridiculed her, made fun of her on a regular basis and leached of on her like a tic.
He even needed a book to be a decent human being to her.
They would kill each other...
Well she would kill him!

My guess is that he actually never loved her and was only interested in her either because she's hot or because he couldn't let Harry get the girl too out of jealousy. (or both)

Harry/Luna: they had more chemistry than him and Ginny... And Luna is the best!

I haven't found a single (serious) fanfic where Luna is bad or not on Harrys side.
It seems as though they are destined to be allies or friends and sometimes lovers.

I know he never truly understood her quirks but he was always respectful to her and their discussions proved that Luna probably emphasized with him more than with anyone else.

Her and Neville? - I mean sure if that's your ship but I don't see the appeal.
Plus I was never that much a fan of Neville to begin with.
I know that he would've been 10 times the friend Ron was but the fact remains that he simply
wasn't.
He could've been the mentor for Harry in all things magical society Harry desperately needed but he wasn't.

In the films he was ironically a better friend than in the books.

And Luna and Neville? What do they have in common? If nothing happened in the background of the canon story than they have even less to talk about than her and Harry.

Harry/Fleur: JKR had the chance to establish a badass female character with the tournament... however she prefered to have one more housewife.
In many Fanfics she's depicted to have had a very rough life while beeing a veela/partial veela at school due to the envy of her female peers and the lust of her male ones.
She could emphasize with Harry because he shared similar experiences (year 2, 4, 5, and to a lesser degree 1, 3 and 6)
He is resistant to influences of the mind and could therefore have a relationship based on trust, love and compassion.
Bill on the other hand tolerated her getting bullied by his mother and sister...
Not a very good base for a healthy relationship.(plus she hate's Britain and is still forced to live there... why Fleur why?!?)
She probably noticed him beeing resistant to her allure and Harry at that time wasn't old enough for her at this point.
He on the other hand was always respectful towards her and JKR missed a opportunity for at least a good friendship while they were together in the burrow with him rightfully defending her and beeing pissed at the Weasleys for treating her like that.

Harry/Gabrielle: (only if she's actually older than she looks with the trope that veelas mature when they are 14 or something like that or if they meet again after she's out of school) basically the same arguments Fleur had plus he's her hero (who saved her without needing to)

Harry/Tonks: Again why Tonks why?!? By that I mean her unnecessary death and the ridiculous romance between 2 characters who do not fit at all.
JKR was most likely pairing of single characters and thought opposites attract.
I've already diplayed my displeasure with Lupin above and there is just no way I could've seen this going well past the war.

(I don't know weither she knew about the abuse Harry had to suffer under the Dursleys but if she knew than she's no better than every other member of the order who knew and allowed it because of Dumbledores Kool-Aid.)

After book 5 I've suspected Harry to be at least a partial metamorph as he regrew his hair in book 1.
Plus with her bubbly personality she could give some much needed light in his dark life.
That and her beeing an auror and her unwaivering loyality which Harry shares with her gives me at least enough ground for a potential realtionship to blossom after the war with her never beeing together with Lupin and both of them working as aurors.

(I for one plan to make her younger or at least come up with a way for her to be in the same year as Harry in my fanfic)

Harry/Katy/Susan/Hannah/Demelza/Daphne/Astoria/Lisa Tulpin/Lilly Moon/Padma...

All those characters and many more are blank sheets who have potential if you make them interesting enough that is.

My enthusiasm for Daphne sadly faded as I've read far too much of this pairing lately.
Plus in most of those fanfics she is basically depicted as a pureblooded darker/grey version of Hermione.

Harry/Bellatrix

already explained above and only if at least one of the conditions I described is fullfiled.

Harry/Narcissa

basically the same reasons as Bellatrix.
I never read a single line in canon about her actually liking Lucius.
Quite the opposite as she seems to be dead inside while beeing next to him (see book 4 at the Quidditch world cup)
I believe that she was forced into marrying him.
She is loyal to her loved one's and would do anything to defend them.
To my knowledge she never became a DE.
And she's a true hero! (Without her Voldy would've won)
Her only fault was giving birth to an asshole and failing to raising him better... but as he seems to be a carbon copy of his father she most likely couldn't exactly teach him very much.

After reading ASOIAF I always imagined her beeing a sane and good version of Cersei who is responsible for the wealth the Malfoys possesed.

Harry/Pansy

I have read some good Harry/Pansy ones but I would probably never write that pairing myself.
So its only on this list to pay respect to those storys who made this unlikely pairing work.

same goes for Harry/fem!Draco, Harry/Lilly Potter, Harry/fem!twin, Harry/fem!Tom (departure...) ...

I also like OC/all those females depicted here plus OC/fem!Harry.

I do not read yaoi-fanfics so I cannot comment on those. (nothing against them I just don't read them)

Now other fanfic series I've read:

HP crossovers with DC, Marvel, Naruto, ...

Naruto, Marvel, DC, Dragon Ball, Bleach, ...

Naruto crossovers with Bleach, Marvel, DC, ...

Naruto however definitely stands out so some notes on that:

Naruto

Naruto like Harry Potter has a vast lore and history... however they have a vast amount of logical errors in common too.

Both protagonists have very much in common.

Both grew up in an abusive environment due to authority figures who abused their trust.

Both were kept weak, ignorant and in the dark on purpose.

Both were raised to be a weapon, both were emotionally manipulated, indoctrinated and lied to about their family and both definitly deserved better hense why countless fanfics even exist.

They both had a male friend who didn't deserve the MCs loyalty.

Naruto was manipulated/kept dumb and weak/indoctrinated by the Hokage, the teachers (Iruka), Kakashi, Jiraya and later even Tsunade as she didnt care to inform him about his parentage.

Jiraya failed in his duty as a godfather as he never made sure to check on his godson.

Plus he didn't teach him shit in 3 years.

The third apparently made sure that he didn't get adopted by the several friends Kushina and Minato had (like Mikoto or Yugao)

He condoned the emotional abuse Naruto was under.

And Kakashi, knowing that Naruto was his senseis son, didn't teach him shit and prefered to teach Sasuke.

Apart from Teuchi and Ayame there was no adult firmly on Narutos side all along.
(and sometimes even that relationship is orchastrated in some fanfictions to guarantee that Naruto doesn't die from hunger as no other villager is willing to sell something for a fair price to Naruto).

No the third was definitly a ruthless and dangerous man as there was no way he wasn't in on the uchiha-massacre and Naruto's miserable life.

Naruto as I always imagined him to be: a genius with unparalled instinct and talent but was neglected by everyone so that he seemed stupid on the surface whereas he just doesn't know it better.
He's naturally a good person and it takes veeery much to make him betray or turn on someone who even once showed him kindness or respect.
I had severall theories on why that is:
First his brain has been tampered with after an attempted suicide or after he killed someone in self-defence or after he tried to flee after another beating by the villagers.
(likely by a yamanaka under Hiruzens/Danzos orders)
Second he could've created a second persona to cope with all the hatred and neglect he had to endure or he learned that if he played the fool, than fewer people would scorn him.
This personality become his dominant one because this method worked.
His real personality grew weaker and weaker until his training with Bee where he tried to take over his body one last time.

To sum it up: I believe that Naruto created his dumb persona out of necessity and that "Yami" is his actual character burried deep inside of him.

Yami seeing that his new persona was necessary gave up and let his idiot-persona take over till nothing was left of him anymore.

He had to create this persona to seem less threatening and to most likely receive less hate or even violence (as depicted in many fanfics).
However if we are going the reeeaaaally dark route, than its even possible, that this dumb persona is the result of a Yamanaka meddleing with Narutos mind on Hiruzens or Danzos orders after he either couldnt take it anymore and tried to commit suicide or after Naruto tried to unleach the kyuubi.

Every single teacher he had let him down besides Bee.
Jiraya, Kakashi and the teachers like Iruka and Mizuki at the academy either didn't care about him, thought he was the kyuubi, didn't bother to look underneath the underneath (I'm looking at you Kakashi) and just thought he was a talentless idiot or they were ordered by the Hokage or Danzo to keep him weak, loyal and stupid and therfore under control.

In his life Naruto created superficial friendships build on his naivity and character but always in a way which requires Naruto to give more than he received.

Starving for affection he rapidly creates bonds with everyone who doesnt treat him like dirt for a change.

Sasuke put his life on the line for him in wave - Bam loyality for life!

Sakura treated him like a human beeing once (before her parents dissuaded her) - Bam Naruto becomes obsessed with her!

Shikamaru and Choji dont ridicule him - Bam he thinks they're his best friends! (even though they never tried to play with him out of their own volition.)

Kakashi/Jiraya taught him the barest minimum - Bam he's the best teacher ever!

Hiruzen buys him ramen every once in a whle - Bam he's his jiji!

Ramen was the first food he was given - Bam it's the food of the gods!

That's why I dont think anyone in this damn village (apart from Teuchi and Ayame - if they're really the kind restaurant-owners theyre always depicted as) and Konohamaru deserve Naruto.

Not Hinata (as she saw Narutos suffering and didnt do shit)

Not Iruka (he mistreated him just like every other teacher for a very long time)

Not Sakura (f*ck that abusive, hypocritical and stupid bitch - smartest kunoichi my ass)

Not Shikamaru (too lazy to do anything against the abuse Naruto had to suffer although he deffinitly noticed it (and filler dont count)

The rest of the Konoha 11 (did they ever try to spend time out of their own volition? No!)

Not Kakashi (he knew he was his senseis son and still prefered to train sasuke although he should know that Naruto didnt even got to know the basics - hes just a self-centered, edgy, lazy pervert who didnt give a shit or was tasked to do exactly that by the third)

Not Tsunade (she still kept his heritage a secred and she too aparently likes to hit him for things he couldnt have known any better because nobody bothered to teach him stuff. In addition to that she is one of his last living relatives and she didnt act up on it. She like the third manipulated Konohas weapon for her benefit)

Not Jiraya (he was Minatos sensei and Narutos godfather and didnt visit him even once to make sure everything is alright. Instead of teaching him seriously he prefers to do his research and makes Naruto do everything on his own even though Naruto lacks the basics. He didnt teach him about the shadow clones, about fuinjutsu (his familys heritage) not even his perverted ways (as Naruto is seemingly still dense as a brick - No for Jiraya Naruto is nothing but a joke and a sidekick for him to get laid - oh and a weapon beacause instead of teaching Naruto how to be a better ninja he instead tried to make Naruto control his bijuu and after that didnt work he just said f*ck it and went back to peeping)

Jiraya couldn't tell Naruto in 3 years what kage bushins do or that he has an elemental affinity.
Kakashi may just be extremely lazy and after everyone close to him died just didn't care anymore (and that's really a stretch imo since he definitly had to know that Naruto was his senseis son)
but Jiraya doesn't have any excuse.
He taught Minato, Nagato, Yahiko and Konan so either every single one of those 4 were geniuses and became S-class ninjas despite Jirayas bad teachings or he really did barelly anything with Naruto in terms of training.
And I even bet that most of the skills Naruto learned in between his training trip and him learning Rasenshuriken were self taught.
Maybe Jiraya just didn't care to teach Naruo anything besides controlling the kyuubi but even there he failed miserably.
Tsunade too didn't teach him anything or tell him about his parents which leads me to believe that Hiruzen left instructions for her in how to deal with Naruto - either that or she didn't really care about Naruto either (which I doubt considering she gifted him one of her most valuable possesions)
I know most of these things probably were due to plotholes because Kishimoto didn't really think his plot through (similar to JKR btw) but still keeping Naruto that stupid (or even worse in some aspects) after the training trip just didn't make sense.
He basically nerfed Naruto while Sasuke on the other hand received countless new abilities, jutsus and skills out of nowhere.
Naruto learned Rasengan and Rasenshuriken in a few days,
Kage bushin in a few hours - same with water walking and Jiraya couldn't teach Naruto any new jutsu in 3 years? -wtf?!
Furthermore he stole his money, ridiculed him repeatedly, peeked on women while Naruto was learning extremely dangerous techniques.
Jiraya is probably only that popular because of the memes and his fight with Pain.
If more fans would think about the implications of Jirayas inactions he would probably be even more unpopular than Orochimaru - who always played with open cards btw and actually trained Sasuke!

Not Sasuke (although he once saved Narutos life on the bridge, he never tried to be a friend to Naruto on a personal level - he always wanted to feel superior to him and after Naruto showed signs of closing the gap between the two he decided to go to Orochimaru and chidoried him two times - however he never mislead Naruto and that's a reason why I believe that Naruto realised that he was one of the very few people who never bullshitted him. He treated him with an amount of respect no one else gave Naruto. However that is still not friendship!)

But Konohamaru! (good bloke - only real friend Naruto had in Konoha)

(if Lee knew Naruto better, than they would've become actual best friends)

well pairings: basically Naruto/every female (and yes that includes Haku)

I've read so many fics with Naruto/grey and dark Naruto that I can honestly say that I've read of nearly all woman beeing with Naruto and Naruto of course with his personality makes practically everything work. (yes I've read even some good Naruto/Sakura ones too)

(and quite honestly when someone deserves love its Naruto)

However there are some pairings I prefer (with the konoha ones only if they are adjusted from canon like for example a more observant Ino or a more proactive Hinata and so on)

Mostly in that order:

Naruto/Ino - they would most likely have very much fun together with their extrovert personalities and their love for plants.

Naruto/Hinata - Kishimoto didn't do it justice (and I always get a bad feeling when Naruto ignores her for another girl who doesn't deserve him in a fic)

Naruto/fem!Haku - she (yes she) had probably one of the biggest impacts on Narutos worldview with her selfsacrificing nature.
They are both extremely loyal and pacifists at heart.
They both had to suffer through extreme injustices and they hit it of almost imideatly.

Naruto/fem!Sasuke - if Sasuke was born with an additional X-chromosome instead of an Y so much of Narutos obsession would make more sense.
I can actually understand yaoi-writers here as their relationship is the best developed one in the series.
They both experienced great injustices but they had different ways to deal with them.
While Sasuke always tried to kill the one who he feels was responsible - Naruto on the other hand chose tha path of forgiveness.
While Sasuke had everything handed to him, Naruto had to suffer and prevail with little to no help given.

"Manumission" by NXSE is one of the most promising fics with that pairing.

Naruto/Anko - It's always entertaining when the combined forces of the snake and the fox terrorize Konoha! She had similar experiences and could probably relate the best to Naruto.

Naruto/fem!Gaara - similar to fem!Sasuke and Anko

Naruto/Konan - why didnt she just stay in Konoha?!?
And well she's just imo the most beautiful woman in the series and Naruto is basically Yahiko reborn.
They would definitly make it work.

Naruto/Kushina - In timetravel fics this is usually the go to pairing.
It's incest I know but then again it's fiction and incest in the Naruto-universe is nothing new btw.

"Tesseract" by Time Parad0x is the best fic with that particular scenario imo
(harem Naruto/Kushina/Mikoto/Mother of Hinata/Mei/Tsunade)

Naruto/Tsunade - if Naruto timetravels than this one is a must!
Tsunade before her losses was quite similar to Naruto - plus she's one of the hottest women in anime-history!

Naruto/Mikoto - I always had the feeling, that she wasn't really happy in her marriage and many fanfics dealed with her (during timetravel-fics) brilliantly

Naruto/fem!Orochimaru/fem!Itachi/fem!Kiba... - yeah there are reaaaally much genderswap-fics out there!

And there is one author (Yojimbra) who did do those genderswap pairings reallly justice!

Naruto/Yugito - I know they never met but if Naruto ever fled the village, than I bet they wouldve at least become friends if not lovers.

Naruto/Samui - same!

Naruto/Fuu - same!

Naruto/Sakura - when I first watched Naruto as a kid I rooted for her and Naruto to become a couple.
He really did everything for her and in my naive mind I thought that she would grow out of her obsession with Sasuke.
I too overlooked all the abuse Naruto had to suffer under her fists because I fell for the comic-relief character of those interactions.
Only when I started to read fanfics I realised what an abusive relationship that actually was.Naruto looking desperatly for any form of attention tried to get into Sakuras good graces with sheer determination, patience and an unprecedented way of looking past someones flaws - and there were many there for Naruto to ignore.
She was basically useless until after the training trip, ignored Naruto even when he sacrificed his health for her, ignored Sasukes psychopatic tendencies, didn't take training seriously (but Kakashi didn't really help either) and many more things.
However there are some fanfics were Sakura is actually usefull, tries to truly make up for her abusive behavior and is for once aware of Naruto's disadvantages and Sasukes destructive way of thinking.

Some fics however don't do any of that and those fics truly infuriate me because such a relationship is doomed to fail.
There are even some fics were I truly begin to despise Sakura even more (even when the author probably didn't meant for that to happen) because Sakura in those fics just ignores her abusive behavior or thinks that with a little sorry everything is fine or even worse they play it of as simple childhood banter.

"Yami no Ai" by brown phantom is probably the best fic where Sakura(s other persona) deals with her and Naruto's past.
I know it's a harem but if you look past that it becomes quite wholesome and it doesn't just deal with Sakuras shortcomings concerning Naruto but basically everyone elses as well.

Right now: (Naruto/Sakura(both personas)/Ino/Hinata)

Bleach

Well imo Ichigo is a mature version of Naruto with his protective nature and his readiness to forgive.

He too was kept in the dark by his father, the soul society, Aizen, Urahara and probably Yoruichi (not sure about her as she led him to Kukaku who could've realised that Ichigo is related to her).

He was kept only as strong as they (again not sure about Yoruichi) needed him to be for their plans.

Ichigo is the perfect harem protagonist as he has good relations with basically every female on the show.

My favourite pairings are:

Ichigo/Nel - she was extremely funny and complimented Ichigos character but could be serious at the same time (plus she's hot!)

Ichigo/Haribell - they basically have the same personality and views (plus she's extremely hot!)

Ichigo/Orihime - she's the (funny) Hinata of this series (just every girl in Bleach is hot)

Ichigo/Yoruichi - She's funny (and hot... I know last time (promise) but it can be applied for the rest as well) and she had great chemistry with Ichigo.

She could know about Uraharas manipulations but I doubt it or at the very least I haven't found a clue about her knowing about his plans.

Ichigo/Tatsuki - I'm extremely dissapointed that she didn't receive a power and went with Ichigo to the soul society.
With her beeing a karate-expert she would definitly have no problems adapting to a new power.
And she definitly would click with Yoruichi.

Ichigo/fem!Ulquiorra - just look at a genderbent fanart

Ichigo/fem!Grimjow - same plus he (well in fanfiction she) is basically an evil mix of Ichigo and Kenpachi

Ichigo/Bambietta - It's disgusting what they did to her after she died! Looks and character remind me of Tatsuki

Ichigo/Rukia - I honestly like her better in the anime then in fanfiction - either that or I haven't read a good one with that pairing yet.

And Kim Possible with Ron Stoppable as a protagonist

He is basically a funny Naruto with low self esteem.

Kim (unconsciously) made him that way and controlled his life.

Otherwise he would have been a harem-protagonist as he managed to charm a lot of girls.

- Tara, Bonnie, Zita, Joss, Yori, Shego, Amelia and Monique come to mind

He had the potential to become the smartest, strongest and therefore most dangerous person in the world. (Zorpox)

Just read works from the author: blue-eye-white-wing

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