Hi! My name is allamericanalien. I'll sign off as Mars. I think Sandra Bullock is awesome and I'm gonna be an author when I grow up. Actually I'll probably be a teen author. Why wait to grow up? Thank God for Spellcheck. My favorite books are Percy Jackson And the Olympians (i recommended the books to all my friends and nobody read them, but everybody saw the movie on opening weekend) Maximum Ride, Gallagher Girls (I might do a Gallagher Girls-PJO crossover, cause i think annabeth would be an awesome spy) Harry Potter (I used to have dreams where I'd go to hogwarts then I'd be so sad when i woke up) Lily's Ghosts by Laura Ruby, Shakespeare's Secret by Elise Broach 9 i was disappointed when it was over) and i dont know any others. I'd be txting my friend and I'd be all "Why don't you read PJO, MR, GG, HS, and HP" and she's be all "what" and then id have to explain it to her. I'm 4'11'', hazel eyes, blonde hair that i occasionally put a blue streak in. I'm Team Edward, but don't love twilight. it's not horrible, but i dont obsess over it .
Remember: I know where you live...or maybe i dont...but ill find out. I make it my business to now stuff that is none of my business.
Copy and paste this to your profile if your a crazy cat lady/guy
Copy and paste this to your profile if you believe in aliens.
Guns don't kill people, the government does-Dale Gerbil, King Of The Hill
Copy and paste this to your profile if your planning on filling up your profile with all those copy and paste to your profile things.
Guns don't kill people, people kill people (please note: 95% of these people are the government) well i think guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG I don't think you'd kill many people.
Copy and paste this to your profile if you have ever said you hardly every do anything stupid then immediately said/done something stupid.
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, IwuvMyKenshyPoo, Heidiplease, iNsOmNiAc BiLlIe JoE lOvEr, Black Panther Warrior, Mina the Mischevious, SnowNeko, Anime-Kunoichi, YuYuInufreak332, Mistress Persephone, HaLoCo, Mrs Cullen for Life, Mimi-Love-4Ever. Prettyinpink4life allamericanalien
"Don't you wish you could have your cake and eat it too?" What is the point of having a cake if you can't eat it?
I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepare to shatter.
To a guy love is only a chapter but to a girl its her whole book.
All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
I hate it when people say: "When life give you lemons, make lemonade." Well, you know what, life never gave you water and sugar, so you can only make lemon juice.
"It's always in the last place you look" Well duh, who keeps looking after they found it.
"Life is short" What? Name one thing you do that is longer than life.
92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off
Give a person a fish, you feed them for a day; Teach a person to use the Internet, they won't bother you for weeks.
Some people are like a slinky..not really good for anything, but you can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
If someone says there are a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if someone say that there is wet paint somewhere you have to touch it?
Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.
Don't frown, even when you’re sad, someone could be falling in love with your smile.
Music is love in search of word.
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.
I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not.
A good friend bails you out of jail. A best friend is sitting there next to you saying 'Man, that was fun!'
My favorite word is sarcasm.
Oops, I appear to have fallen on your lips.
My heart is not a playground
If life gives you lemons, throw them back at the jerk who gave 'em to ya and demand chocolate.
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile
if you think some people must be on suger highs when they write their stories copy and paste this into your profile.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep-- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
"God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made woman." - Adela Rodgers St. Johns
"Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door,"- Unknown
“When there's a will, I want to be in it.” – Unknown
When I was younger, my parents encouraged me to walk and talk. Now, all they want me to do is sit down and shut up!
Too often, we lose sight of life's simple pleasures. Remember, when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown, BUT it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bitch slap that mother f upside the head
Don't think of your self as an ugly person. Think of yourself as a beautiful monkey.
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.
"We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do."
You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor
It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it?
Music is like candy-you throw away the rappers.
7 reasons Not to Mess with small children
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted,
"Cause your feet ain't empty."
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE . God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
Copy and Paste this to your profile if you wish Angel was still sweet and hate new creepy Angel.
Copy and Paste this to your profile if you love long profiles filled with copy and pate this to your profile.
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC
" Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to
the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident ."
7. My mother taught me IRONY
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me CONTORTIONISM
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me WEATHER
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me: ENVY
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me: RECEIVING
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me: MEDICAL SCIENCE
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."
19. My mother taught me: ESP
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me: HUMOR
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me: HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22.My Mother taught me: Genetics
"I swear you're just like your father."
23. My Mother taught me about my Roots
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My Mother taught me Wisdom
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. My mother taught me about Justice
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you"
ONE FOR THE GIRLS!
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you'll turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Copy and paste this to your profile if you think racists sux
How stupid people think we are:
On a sears hairdryer
"Do not use while sleeping" (What! thats the only time i have to dry my hair)
On a bag of Frittos
"You could be a winner! No purchase necassary. Details inside (the shoplifter kind!)
On a bar of Dove soap
"Directions: use like regualr soap" (And that is how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners
"seving suggestion:Defrost" (but it's just a suggestion)
On a hotel provided shower cap in a box
"Fits one head" (a big one or small one?)
On tesco's tiramassu dessert
"Do not turn upside down" (too late! you loose!)
On marks and spencers bread pudding
"product will be hot after heating" (are you sure? lets experiment!)
On packaging for a Rowetta Iron
"Do not iron clothes on body" (But why! it'd save me time!) (Whose body?)
On Boots Children Cough medicine
"Do not drive car or operate machinery" (we could do alot to reduce the rate of construction if we just kept those 5 year olds of the fork lifts)
On nytol sleep aid
"Warning: May cause drowsiness" ( no shit sherlock)
On a Korean kitchen knife
"Warning keep out of children" ( but not pets! whats for dinner?)
On a string of chinese christmas lights
"For indoor and outdoor use only" ( as opposed to using in outer space)
On a japanese food processor
"not to be used for the other use" (ooh you got me curious)
On sainsburys peanuts
"Warning:contains nuts" (but no peas?)
On an american airplanes bag of nuts
"instructions: open bag eat nuts" (really? i never knew thank you for enlightening me)
On a swedish Chainsaw
"do not try to stop machine with hands or genitials" (what is this? a home castration kit?)
On a childs superman question
"wearing this garment does not enable you to fly" (that's right! destroy a childs universal fantasy!)
A label on a baby stroller
"Remove baby before folding" (Ah man you mean i gotta carry it?)
A popular scooter for children
"Warning: this product moves when used" (Really i would never have guessed it!)
A dishwasher warns
"Warning do not allow children to play in the dishwasher (ah man that was my favourite hiding place!)
If you don't have a boyfriend and aren't interested in getting one copy and paste this to your profile.
Copy and Paste this to your profile if you like Chuck on Nbc mondays at 8-7:00
Try Not To Cry:
Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great, huge crack.
Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!
When I went to school that day,
I never said good-bye.
I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.
When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,
And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.
Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,
And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.
And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,
And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best
Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest
Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass
Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.
But Mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.
And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try
I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.
Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest
When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could
Please listen to me if you would,
I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.
But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,
Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date.
I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true
And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"
Copy and past ^^^^ is you cried. I did.
To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!"
5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Marijuana
7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.
9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner,'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'
20 And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity, Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr waht oerdr the ltteres of a wrod are in, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer are in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs cpoy and psate it in yuor pofrile.
OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
If you are against racism, COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE. The only race is humanity.
A poem I am passing on about child abuse, I hope you pass it on too.
My name is Tiffany, I am three,
My eyes are swollen, I cannot see,
I must be stupid, I must be bad,
What else could have made, My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better, I wish I weren’t ugly,
Then maybe my mommy, Would still want to hug me,
I can’t do a wrong,
I can’t speak at all, Or else I'm locked up, All day long,
When I'm awake I'm all alone, The house is dark, My folks aren’t home,
When my mommy does come home,
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll just get, One whipping tonight,
I just heard a car,
My daddy is back, From Charlie’s bar,
I hear him curse, My name is called,
I press myself, Against the wall,
I try to hide, From his evil eyes,
I’m so afraid now, I’m starting to cry,
He finds me weeping, Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault, He suffers at work,
He slaps and hits me, And yells at me more,
I finally get free, And run to the door,
He’s already locked it, And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me, against the hard wall,
I fall to the floor, With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues, With more bad words spoken,
"I’m sorry!", I scream, But its now much to late,
His face has been twisted, Into a unimaginable shape,
The hurt and the pain, Again and again,
O please God, have mercy! O please let it end!
And he finally stops, and heads for the door,
While I lay there motionless, Sprawled on the floor,
My name is Tiffany, I am three,
Tonight my daddy, Murdered me.
And you can help to stop this for others. And if you read this and don’t pass it on I pray for your forgiveness because you would have to be One heartless person to not be affected By this poem and because you are affected, Do something about it! So all I ask you to do Is pass this on! If you are against child abuse.
Walmart, do they like sell walls there?-Paris Hilton
No, surprisingly they don't.-Paris' Dumb Friend
Copy and paste this to your profile if you like dumb blonde jokes and you are blonde.
Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb the way
o the top
of the tree.
"REMEMBER WHEN
REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
'm 0 m' (was your hero)
and 'D a D' was the guy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?
Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now
I completely fell for him, but he didn't even stumble.
I don't forgive people because I'm weak; I forgive them because I'm strong enough to realize people make mistakes.
Sweetie, if you're gonna be two-faced, at least make one of them pretty.
Friends believe in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself.
You have to take the good with the bad, smile when you're sad, love what you've got, and remember what you had. Always forgive, but never forget, learn from your mistakes but never regret. People change, and things go wrong, but just remember: life goes on.
What's this thing you call "normal"? Is it contagious? OMG! Don't touch me! I might catch your "normal"!
Keep your head held high; there are people who would kill to see you fall.
You should see me when the meds aren't working.
I want a man that when I come running up to him with tears streaming down my face, the first thing he says is, "Baby, whose ass do I have to kick?"
Life's too short and nothing lasts forever, so live it up, drink it down, laugh it off, avoid the bull crap, and never have regrets, because at one point what you did was exactly what you wanted.
I name inanimate objects.
She's so scared to get close to anyone because anyone that ever said, "I love you. . . I'll be there. . ." left.
I expect a hug the next time I see you.
Her favorite song will say more about her than she ever will.
What upsets me is not that you lied to me; it's that from now on, I can no longer trust you.
Never underestimate the power of a good cry.
In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing.
Sometimes you make me so mad I wanna throw you in the middle of on-going traffic; but then I realize I would probably kill myself trying to save you.
If You Really Love Something Set It Free.
If It Comes Back It's Yours, If Not It Wasn't Meant To Be
If I never met you, I wouldn't like you. If I didn't like you I wouldn't love you.
If I didn't love you I wouldn't miss you, but I did, I do and I will.
I had a dream and it was about you ...
I smiled and recalled the memories we had ...
then I noticed a tear fell from my eyes ... you know why?
Coz in my dream you kissed me and said goodbye ...
If in this lifetime, I wont get to have you,
I'll make sure that if I meet you in my next life
I wont have to think twice on saying that
"I waited a lifetime to say I love you..."
Should I hate you because you hurt me?
Or should I love you because you made me feel special?
Why am I afraid to lose you when you're not even mine...
Don't ever give up if you still want to try,
Don't ever wipe your tears if you still want to cry.
Don't ever settle for an answer if you still want to know.
Don't ever say you don't love him if you can't let him go.
Ask me how many times my heart has been broken
and I will tell you to look in the sky and count the stars.
She's got him falling head over heels
for her and I can't even get him to stumble..
If you could choose between life and death
you would almost rather die,
love is fun but hurts so much
the price you pay is high.
And so I say don't fall in love,
you will get hurt before your through.
You see my friend, I ought to know,
I fell in love with you.
Days continue to pass, stars continue to shine.
Why do I have tears in my eyes today
when he was NEVER mine?
If I could be anyone at this moment,
I'd be her so you'd love me too.
Sometimes you make me so mad I want to throw you in the middle of ongoing traffic, but then I realize I would probably kill myself trying to save you.
Guy's point of view
(Here's the take on relationships from a guy's POV. NOT MINE)
From a guys point of view:
We don't care if you talk to other guys.
We don't care if you're friends with other guys.
But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him without even introducing us, yeah, it -- us off.
It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.
We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 in the morning we do get a little concerned. Nothing is that important at 2 a.m. that it can't wait till he morning.
Also, when we tell you you're pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/cute/ stunning, we freaking mean it.
Don't tell us we're wrong. We’ll stop trying to convince you.
The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.
Yeah, you can quote me.
Don't be mad when we hold the door open.
Take Advantage of the mood I’m in.
LET US PAY FOR YOU! DON'T 'FEEL BAD'
We enjoy doing it.
It's expected.
Smile and say 'thank you.'
Kiss us when no one's watching.
(If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be more impressed.)
You don't have to get dressed up for us.
If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every kind of makeup you own.
We like you for WHO you are and not WHAT you are.
Honestly, I think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's or my t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up.
Don't take everything we say seriously.
Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it.
Don't get angry easily.
Stop using magazines/media as your bible.
Don't talk about how hot Morris Chesnutt, Brad Pitt, or Jesse McCartney is in front of us. It's boring, and we don't care. You have girlfriends for that.
Whatever happened to the word 'handsome'/'beautiful'?
I'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with 'Hey handsome!’ instead of 'Hey baby/ stud/ cutie/ sexy' or whatever else you can think of.
On the other hand I’m not sayin I wouldn't like it ether.
Girls: I cannot stress this enough: IF YOU AREN'T BEING TREATED RIGHT BY A GUY, DON'T WAIT FOR HIM TO CHANGE. DITCH HIS SORRY DISGRACE-TO-THE-MALE-POPULATION, AND FIND SOMEONE WHO WILL TREAT YOU WITH UTTER RESPECT
Someone who will honor your morals.
Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest.
Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes.
Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.
Someone who will stop what they're doing just to look you in the eyes...and say 'I love you' ...AND ACTUALLY MEAN IT!
Give the nice guys a chance
Holding Hands- Girls: If you want to hold his hand, gently bump into it a couple of times. Guys: Grab it if it happens more than once.
Cuddling- Girls: When you want to cuddle with him, tell him you're cold. Guys: Automatically move closer to her.
Movies- Girls: During a movie, if he puts his arm around you, tilt your head on his shoulder. Guys: Lift her chin up and kiss her.
Loving each other- Guys: When she tells you she loves you, look deep into her eyes, give her a peck on the lips, and tell her you love her too... And mean it.
Laying below the stars- Girls: When you're both laying under the stars, put your head on his chest and close your eyes as you listen to his steady heart beat Guys: Whisper in her ear and link your hands with hers.
From Rick Riordan's blog:
This is completely random, but I thought it was funny. My mom has a window in her kitchen that looks out on the backyard. A few years ago, we bought her a bird feeder to hang outside the window. This particular feeder is called a "Yankee Flipper" because it's designed to keep the squirrels from stealing the birdseed. If an animal heavier than a bird, like a squirrel, tries to sit on the ring, the ring spins around and flips them off. This doesn't hurt them, but it does make for some amusing moments around the kitchen table when we go over for breakfast every Sunday. THWACK! Another squirrel hits the window. Raccoons, however, are very smart animals. The one in the photo found a way to stay on the Yankee Flipper and not get flipped. I wasn't there at the time, but apparently he pigged out of sunflower seeds and was not impressed when my stepfather tried to shoo him away. He was quite happy to pose for photos, then went back to pigging out.
Favorite Quotes.
I look like prep school barbie *looks at Max* No you look like prep school barbie. I'm just Barbie's friend.-Nudge.
" How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?" -Homer Simpson
"Would do rather be a friendless loser or have tons of friends who secretly hate you?" "I guess I'd rather be a friendless loser.""Congrats, you just got your wish."-Claire and Massie(?) The clique Movie.
" Quick! What's the number for 991!"-Homer Simpson
Copy and paste this to your profile if you've ever shared makeup with a stranger in a bathroom at a high school football game.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects...copy this into your profile.
If you've ever randomly fallen out of your chair, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever fallen going up the stairs, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever pushed on a door that said pull (or Vice Versa) copy this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
The Percy Jackson pledge:
I promise to remember Percy
whenever I'm at sea
I promise to remember Annabeth
whenever a spider comes at me
I promise to protect nature
for Grover's sake of course
I promise to remember Luke
when my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Chiron
whenever I see a sign that says ''free pony ride''
I promise to remember Tyson
whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side
I promise to remember Thalia
whenever a friend is scared of heights
I promise to remember Clarisse
whenever I see someone that gives me a fright
I promise to remember Bianca
whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother
I promise to remember Nico
whenever I see someone who doesnt get along with others
I promise to remember Zoe
whenever I watch the stars
I promise to remember Rachel
whenever a limo passes my car.
yes I promise to remember PJO
wherever I may go
Life isn’t passing me by, it’s trying to run me over
Heaven doesn’t want me, and Hell’s afraid I’ll take over.
Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.
Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit just a little bit harder.
I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
If Walmart is lowering prices daily, then how come none of it is free yet?
Why does the psychic hotline ask for your credit card number? Shouldn't they already know it?
Why do they report power outages on TV?
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future?
Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved America's problems?
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile.
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.
I was going to take over the world but got distracted by something sparkly
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.
Dont follow in my footsteps, I run into walls
Growing old is mandatory...growing up is optional...
When you get caught looking at him just remember he was looking back.
.eliforp ruoy otni siht etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI
If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. The irony...
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this on your profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.
If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
If you think the Cocoa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.
Characters Of Chuck
1. John Casey
2. Morgan Grimes
3.Sarah Walker
4.Chuck Bartowski
5. Ellie Bartowski
6. Captain Awesome
7. Bryce Larkin
8. Jeff
9. Lester
10. Big Mike
1) 4 invites 3 and 8 to dinner at their house. What happens?
Chuck invites Sarah and Jeff to dinner. Jeff gets drunk and starts hitting on Sarah. Then he breaks out his Hi! I'm Jeff and I'm lost dog tag.
2) 9 tries to get 5 to go to a yoga class. What happens
Lester tries to get Ellie to go to a yoga class. I can't imagine.
3) You need to stay at a friend’s house for the night. Do you choose 1 or 6?
1! John Casey's. He could teach me to throw a knife or something.
4) 2 and 7 are making out. 10 walks in...Their reaction?
Morgan and Bryce are making out. Big Mike walks in... Bryce says Morgan swallowed his medicine and he's trying to get it out.
5) 3 falls in love with 6. 8 is jealous. What happens?
Sarah falls in love with Awesome. Jeff is jealous. Jeff tells Ellie Awesome is cheating on her.
6) 4 mugs you in a dark alleyway. Who comes to your rescue? 10, 2 or 7?
Chuck mugs you in a dark alley. Probably Morgan.
7) 1 decides to start a cooking show. 15 minutes later what is happening?
John Casey decides to start a cooking show. !5 minutes minutes later he's in a knife fight with Shaw or someone.
9) 3 has to marry either 8, 4 or 9. Who do they chose?
Sarah decides on Chuck.
10) 7 kidnaps 2 and demands something from 5 for 2's release. What is it
Bryce kidnaps Morgan and demands something from Ellie for Morgan's release. It's probably a med or something.
11) You get to meet either 1 or 6. Who do you chose?
OMG! I can't choose.
12) 10 challenges 4 to a chariot race. Why?
For management of the BuyMore.
13) Everyone gangs up on 3. What happens?
She whips everyone's butt.
14) Everyone is invited to 2 and 10 wedding except for 8. How do they react?
Everyone is invited to Morgan's and Big Mike's wedding -Mike's dating dating his mom but whatever- expect for Jeff. Jeff and Lester gets drunk and play Mr. Roboto by Styx to crash the wedding.
15) Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because Bryce is a CIA operative and Awesome is a civilian.
16) 10 gathers everyone around to tell them a fairy tale. How does it go?
Big Mike tells his life story and the ring breaks in and drunk Jeff fights them off.
Favorite Book Characters
1. Max
2. Cammie
3. Nico
4. Hero
5. Annabeth
6. Sadie
7. Lily
8. Liz
9. Percy
10. Thalia
1) 4 invites 3 and 8 to dinner at their house. What happens?
Hero invites Nico and Liz. Don't want to imagine.
2) 9 tries to get 5 to go to a yoga class. What happens
Percy tries to get Annabeth to go to a yoga . No clue.
3) You need to stay at a friend’s house for the night. Do you choose 1 or 6?
Sadie. At least it will be almost normal.
4) 2 and 7 are making out. 10 walks in...Their reaction?
Cammie and Lily are making out. Thalia walks in... They all freak out.
5) 3 falls in love with 6. 8 is jealous. What happens?
Nico falls in love with Sadie. Liz is jealous. Liz uses her spy stuff to make Sadie look stupid.
6) 4 mugs you in a dark alleyway. Who comes to your rescue? 10, 2 or 7?
Hero mugs me in a dark alleyway. Cammie would come to my rescue.
7) 1 decides to start a cooking show. 15 minutes later what is happening?
Max decides to starts a cooking show. Fiftenn minutes later a close family is watching it. They see Iggy cooking and Max throwing up from eating food she made.
9) 3 has to marry either 8, 4 or 9. Who do they chose?
Nico has to marry either Liz, Hero or percy. He chooses Hero.
10) 7 kidnaps 2 and demands something from 5 for 2's release. What is it
Lily kidnaps Cammie, and demands something from Annabeth for Cammie's release. It's Annabeth magical Yankees cap.
11) You get to meet either 1 or 6. Who do you chose?
Well, I'm already spending the night at Sadie's house, so Max.
12) 10 challenges 4 to a chariot race. Why?
Thalia challenges Hero to a chariot race, because Hero's name is Hero.
13) Everyone gangs up on 3. What happens?
Everyone gangs up on Nico. He uses his powers to raise an army of the dead to kick everyone's butts.
14) Everyone is invited to 2 and 10 wedding except for 8. How do they react?
Everyone is invited to Thalia and Cammie's wedding, expect for Liz. Liz hacks into Cammie's computer and changes the guest list.
15) Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Why is Sadie afraid of Lily? Because Lily has the help of ghosts.
16) 10 gathers everyone around to tell them a fairy tale. How does it go?
Thalia talks about life.
"Oh, a sadistic vampire, intent on torturing her to death, no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV on the other hand..." -Edward Cullen-Twilight
"Of all the things about me that could frighten you, you worry about my driving."
-Edward Cullen-Twilight
"I've decided that as long as I was going to Hell, I might as well do it thoroughly."
-Edward Cullen-Twilight
"And So the lion fell in love with the lamb."
"What a stupid lamb."
"What a sick masochistic lion."
-Edward Cullen, Bella Swan-Twilight
"I made the cowardly lion look like the terminator." -Bella-Twilight
“I refuse to be affected by territorial disputes between mythical creatures.” -Bella Swan-Twilight
"Holy (insert swear word of your choice here.)"-Fang-MR-AE
"Those wacky Brits called fries 'chips'. And potato chips were 'crisps'. And cookies were 'biscuits'. I had no idea what real biscuits were called. Wangdoodles?" ~Max-MR-StWaOES
"South America. It'll be warm. They have llamas. You like llamas." -Max-MAX
"I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahs!" -Gazzy-STWAOES
"Have you guys been playing in the toxic waste again? Been bitten by a radioactive spider? Struck by lightning? Drink a super-soldier serum?" -Fang-FW
"Kids are the future? Aw, crap. We're all screwed."-Me
“Kabobs – tasty tidbits or skewers of doom?” – Reporter from Zack and Cody
“Okay, where the heck is my pinky?” – my cousin
"Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect." - Stephen Wright
"I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places." - Henry Youngman
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. And inside of a dog, it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
"I spilled spot remover on my dog - now he's gone." - Stephen Wright
"When I was born, I was so surprised I couldn't talk for a year and a half." - Gracie Allen
"I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer." - Douglas Adams
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land amongst the stars." - Les Brown
"I don't think ordinary things are very interesting, so I try to imagine a world that is less ordinary." - Chris Van Allisburg
"Just about everything in this world is easier said than done, with the exception of 'systematically assisting Sisyphus's stealthy cyst-susceptible sister', which is easier done than said." - Lemony Snicket
"Life is hard. After all, it kills you." - Katharine Hepburn
"I intend to live forever. So far, so good." - Stephen Wright
"I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it." - Mitch Hedberg
"I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally." - W. C. Fields
"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying." - Woody Allen
"My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the heck she is." - Ellen DeGeneres
"If two wrongs don't make a right, try three." - Laurence J. Peter
"It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes." - Jay London
"I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens." - Woody Allen
"I bought some batteries, but they weren't included." - Stephen Wright
"Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler." - W. C. Fields
"Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country." - Stephen Wright
"Duct tape is like the force - it has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together." - Anonymous
“You are a sad, strange little man.” – Buzz Lightyear from Toy Story
Woody: “Well, Stinky Pete, I think it's time you learned the true meaning of playtime. Right over there, guys!” Prospector: “No. No! NO!!”[The toys place him into a Barbie backpack]
“Roz, my tender, oozing blossom, you're looking fabulous today. Is that a new haircut? Tell me it's a new haircut. It's got to be a new haircut. New makeup? You had a lift? You had a tuck? You had something? Something has been inserted in you that makes you look like...Listen, I need a favor.” - Mike from Monsters Inc.
“... the guy has me on a platter, and he won’t shut up!!” – Frozone from The Incredibles
“Be my prisoner? Oh please oh please be my prisoner?” – Dug from Up
“Why do I enjoy killing teenagers so much??” – R.L. Stine
“Luke. I am your MOTHER!! Here, want some cookies?”
“Ding-dong, the witch is dead!” “Which ol’ witch?” “The WICKED witch! Ding-dong, the wicked witch is dead! ... Let them know the wiiiiickeeeed wiiitch iiiis - DEEAAAAAAAAAAAD!!!” – The Wizard of Oz
“Why would someone murder Mitch and gift wrap him for her?” - A line from an R.L. Stine book
I, as Curiosity's lawyer, have proof that Curiosity didn't kill the Cat! The real murderer is...*pause for dramatic effect* that guy *points at Stupidity*.-Me
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, danceswithwings119, gottaluvtwilight,freexflyer, Green.Winged.Mistress, MoonStarWithWings, Yourcool79, MyNameIsCAB, Shatchi, Gabby510, DarkAngel2011, Andre Lord of Fail10, katanakid14 allamericanalien
IF YOU'VE EVER LEAPED DOWN THE HALLWAY OF A HOTEL AND TURNED THE CORNER AND SAW PEOPLE STARING AT YOU COPY AND PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile
If you can never find a candy that actually tastes sour to you, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever just fallen straight down for no apparent reason while standing still outside, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever made a parent usher his/her kids away from you for any odd reason, copy this into your profile. (I did this one AND the previous one at the same time! My sister still mocks me for that ...)
If you are against child abuse, you should copy this into your profile.
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you don't do drugs and never will, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think cancer is awful, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you talk to yourself and aren't afraid to admit it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are against animal cruelty, put this in your profile.
If you love God with your whole heart and are 100 percent proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
IF YOU LOVE PERCABETH, COPY AND PASTE THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE.
IF YOU HATE PRACHEL, COPY AND PASTE THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE!
If you repeatedly read page 203 in The Battle of the Labyrinth, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you've ever forgotten how old you are when someone asked you, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, cpy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.
If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.
If you have ever seen a movie or read a book so many times that you can quote it word for word, and do so at random moments, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you believe some teachers are seriously prejudiced, copy an paste this in your profile
If you have ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.
If keyboards hate you, copy and paste this.
If you have ever wanted to slap someone, but restrained yourself, congratulations, and copy and paste this to your profile.
If you take great pride in being strange, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you can think of a song in relation to almost anything, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever had multiple songs stuck in your head at the same time, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you smack books when the characters are being annoying, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end reading multiple fanfictions copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile.
If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace and Facebook is to other people, copy this into your profile.
If you actually take the time to read copy and pastes, copy this onto your profile.
You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a cliff, I laugh even harder!
I ran with scissors, and lived!
If you ever killed a joke, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this into your profile.
If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, put it on your profile.
If you get way to excited for books, movies, ect. to come out, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever done anything incredibly stupid for no apparent reason, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.
If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile
If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.
If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites, copy this in your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile
If you have a teacher who doesn't know what the heck there doing and you hate them because they annoy you paste this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!
If someone gave you money for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever had the sudden desire to own a tazer, copy and paste this into your profile!!
If you happen to still talk to your imaginary Friend and occasionally punch him/her because they are know it alls copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.
If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.
Crazy? Once I was crazy. They locked me in a room to die. Die? I don't want to die. All the mice will get me. Mice? I hate mice. They drive me crazy. Crazy? Once I was crazy. They locked...
If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insanse, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think the world is heading to a bad place, and are planning on doing something about it by making wonderful stories, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Copy this and paste it on your profile if you think sarcasm is a conditioned reflex.
If you can freak someone out just by glaring at them, copy and paste this on your profile.
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear it up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!! IF THIS MADE YOU LAUGH COPY AND PASTE IT ON YOUR PROFILE.
Fun Things To Do In An Elevator (LOL)
1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly.
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22) CALL out "Group hug," then enforce it.
This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?
PLEASE READ. If this doesnt touch you... I cried!
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.
The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.
The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."
Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''
The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''
Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.
The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.
Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.
"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."
I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry.
But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."
His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''
My heart nearly stopped.
The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."
Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't
forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."
Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''
"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for
the doll and even some spare money.
The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"
Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that
mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''
"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''
"My mommy loves white roses."
A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.
I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.
Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.
The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?
Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away.
I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.
She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.
I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister
is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
Now you have 2 choices:
1) Repost this message.
2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart
╔╗╔═╦╗ put this on your page
║╚╣║║╚╗ if you love to laugh
I'm into THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual
I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude
I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control
I'm WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer
I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a vampire fetish
I'm a GOOD LIAR, so everything that comes out of my mouth MUST be a lie.
I go to PRIVATE SCHOOL, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone's butt
I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant
I'm FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual
I'm a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian (i actually am trying out being vegetarian)
I'm a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie
I'm INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs
I'm a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up
I have GREEN SKIN, so I MUST be a wicked witch
I'm DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention
I'm an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean
I'm THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz
I HAVE A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be dating them all
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math
I'm AFRICAN AMERICAN, so I MUST be on welfare
I'm PUNK, so I MUST slit my wrists
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist
I'm IRISH, so I MUST be an alcoholic
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be an idiot with a jock boyfriend
I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy
I LOVE RENT, so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head
I'm AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports
I like CATS, so I MUST dance like a cat in my spare time
I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi
I'm IN BAND, so I MUST be a geek
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST be rebellious
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser
I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals
I'm a DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay
I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid and stuck up
I'm ALWAYS SMILING AND LAUGHING, so I MUST have a great life
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention
I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too
I COPIED AND PASTED THIS INTO MY PROFILE, so I MUST be a plagiarist
I like to READ, so I MUST be a nerd
I FROWN a lot, so I MUST have a bad life
I get BAD GRADES, so I MUST be a slacker who doesn't try
I'm a JEW, so I MUST hate all Germans
I like to listen to HANNAH MONTANA, so I MUST be childish and immature
I am POLITE to TEACHERS, so I MUST be a teacher's pet
I HATE HANNAH MONTANA, so I MUST have no inner child
I wear HOLLISTER and AEROPOSTALE, so I MUST be a stupid and rich preppy slut.
I don't ADORE Twilight, so I MUST not believe in true love.
Stop stereotypes! Copy this list into your profile and add any more that you can think of. BOLD ones are me.
Stupid things! In italics and bold are the thing's I've done... haha. Out of 100 I have done/am doing 65... wow.
1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out
2. Gotten your head stuck between the stair rails
3. Broken a chair by leaning back in it
4. Had gum fall out of your mouth while you were talking
5. Choked on your own spit while you were talking
6. Had people tell you that you are blonde when you're not/or had had people tell you that your blonde highlights are going to your head
7. Been caught staring at your crush by your crush him/herself
8. Have looked for something for at least 10 min then realized it was in your hand
9. Tried to push open a door that said pull
10. Tried to pull open a door that said push
11. Have actually believed someone when they said that they knew how to make a love potion
12. Have hit yourself in the process of trying to hit something else
13. Have tripped and fallen UP the stairs
14. Have actually exploded marshmallows in the microwave
15. Have gotten gum stuck in your hair
16. Had gum fall out of your mouth while trying to blow a bubble
17. Have had the juice from a mini tomato squirt out and hit somebody else when you bit into it
18. Have had your drink come out your nose because you were laughing so hard
19. Have called one of your good friends by the wrong name
20. Have skinned your toe because you were playing soccer or kickball with flip flops on or you were barefoot
21. Have put a sticker on your forehead, forgot it was there, and went out in public with it on
22. Have fallen out of a moving vehicle.
23. Have run into a closed door
24. Have almost shot someone with a real gun while trying to shoot something else
25. Searched for your cell phone while you were talking on it
26. It has taken you longer than 5 min to get a joke
27. Have gotten your hair stuck in a blow dryer
28. Have gotten your hair stuck in a fan
29. Tripped on a crack in the sidewalk
30. Said o'clock after saying how many min after the hour, example: 5:30 o'clock, or 6:15 o'clock
31. After someone told you that there was gum on the ground, you stepped in it
32. Put on a white shirt even though you already knew it was raining outside
33. Have ever walked up to a stranger because you thought they were someone else
34. Ever been kicked out of a grocery store/off their property
35. Touched the stove, the curling iron, a hot pan, etc on purpose even though you knew it was hot
36. Picked out your change of clothes, took off the ones you had on and then accidentally put the old clothes back on
37. Wondered why something wasn't working then realized it wasn't plugged in
38. Put the cereal in the fridge, or put the milk in the cupboard
39. Walked into a pole
40. Wore two different earrings or shoes by accident
41. Put your shirt on backwards/inside-out without realizing it then left your house
42. Tried to take a picture of your/someone's eye with the flash on
43. Gotten a ring stuck on your finger because you put it on even though you knew it was too small
44. Walked out of the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to your shoe without realizing it
45. Went to go do something/go get something, then when you got there forgot what is was that you were going to do.
46. Picked up someone else's drink and drank out of it by accident when your drink was right next to it
47. Fallen out of your chair while trying to pick something up
48. Have poked yourself in the eye
49. Have gotten in the shower with your socks still on
50. Melted your hairbrush while blow drying your hair
51. Have done enough stupid things to make a test
52. Have accidentally stabbed yourself with a pencil
53. Have sung the wrong verse to a song without realizing it
54. Have given an odd answer to a question because you didn't hear the question in the first place and didn't feel like asking what it was.
55. Told someone you were the wrong age because you seriously forgot how old you were
56. Looked into an overhead light purposefully while it was on
57. Got up early and got ready for school/work/meeting, then realized that you didn't have school/work/meeting that day.
58. Have tripped on a cord after someone told you to watch out for it
60. Have ever laughed at a joke that no one else thought was funny or a movie
61. Done the Macarena to the electric slide or vice versa
62. Said funner, then had someone make fun of you for it
63. Have repeated yourself at least twice in the same sentence
64. Brought up an inside joke with the wrong person
65. Didn't do the backside of an assignment because you thought that there wasn't one because you had already looked and forgot that there was another side
66. Did more work than you had to on an assignment because you didn't read the directions
67. Corrected someone's grammar/pronunciation then figured out that you were the one that was wrong
68. Put something in a special place so that you would remember where it was, then forgot where you put it
69. Put ice in your drink after the glass was full of liquid and had it splash out-
70. Told a lie then forgot what it was that you had said and got caught
71. When wearing goggles, you pulled them away from your face and let go so that they would come back and snap you in the face
72. Forgot to make sure that the lamp was off before you replaced the light bulb
73. Ran into a door jam
74. Told someone that you hardly ever do stupid things, then immediately did/said something stupid
75. Told someone to watch out for something, then you were the one that ran into it
76. Have purposely licked playground sand
77. Have purposely and repeatedly flicked yourself with a rubber band
78. Gotten so hyper that someone actually thought you were drunk when you weren't
79. Have been so hyper you actually scared people
80. Put duct tape on your body then pulled it off to see if it would pull your hairs out
81. Put duct tape on your hair/someone else's hair then pulled it off
82. Put a clothes pin/hair clip on your lip, figured out that it hurt, then did it again
83. Sat and wondered why men’s dress shirts have a loop on the back.
84. Made up a code name for someone so that you could talk about them to someone else and no one else would know who you were talking about
85. Have gotten a hairbrush stuck in your hair
86. Used the straw to blow the straw wrapper at someone
87. Shaved your tongue because you thought your taste buds looked weird
88. When at a restaurant/cafeteria, you used your spoon to fling stuff at people
89. Have flung forks at people in a restaurant/cafeteria
90. Sucked on a cup and got a hickey from it.
91. As you were writing, you moved your head back and forth with your pen/pencil
92. Have drawn finger puppets on your fingers then named them
93. Have wrapped someone in a roll of toilet paper
94. Have used somebody else's toothbrush without even realizing it wasn't yours
95. Started telling a story and forget what you were talking about or what happened in the story
96. When you saw a ‘beware of dog’ sign, you told the owners to beware of the dogs not realizing they owned the dogs
97. You have spelled your own name wrong before
98. When lying in bed you look for pictures in the texture of the ceiling.
99. Have used your calculator as a form of communication in class.
100. Have popped a balloon in your mouth.
Copy and paste this to your profile if you don't understand flamers.