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OutlawJustice PM
Joined Apr '11

Age: 25

Location: where ever i am

Hobbies: video games, anime, fishing, and gardening.

Likes: jokes, ribs, chinaese food, RPGs and hanging out with my brother and sister.

Dislikes: Flamers, stuck up asses who try to sound smart but they are not, and i bunch of other things i can't recall at the moment

About my purpose on this site: I have been reading fanfics for years. But there is one thing that always irked me somewhat about a lot of authors works, or rather other reviewer's reaction to author's works. an author could have some some horrid formatting in their story and big and obvious plot holes, yet reviewers would simply say "good job" or flat out flame them. i personally find this to be a great injustice to the author, most notably to new authors. why? by simply saying "good job" or anything like that, you are basically telling the author that everything about the fic is fine when in reality it isn't. as reviewers, we should point out these problems so the author can improve, it is in a way, our gift to the author for allowing us to read what his/her imagination cooked up.

Flamers are retards (i can't be any nicer than that) who quite frankly, have no business reviewing. the time one takes to flame could be better spent giving suggestions to the author to better improve upon their work. the only thing flaming does, is make the author drop a potentially good story. far too many of my favorite stories and even authors are gone due to some ass that wants to nit pick over the simplest of things, or just have no life and must find some form of gratification in bashing other from the safety of their computer monitor. some flames are justified but these cases are extremely rare and in all my years here i've only come across one in the naruto/rosariovampire Xover area.

my purpose here is to review fics and if spotted, i will point out a few problems in an authors fics (if there are any) and present it in a mature manner so hopefully the author can improve upon their work. as such i would like to leave a few tips here on my profile to help anyone who may be thinking about making a fic (lol as if anyone would look on this profile lol). these are some of the most common issues i've come across over the years.

1. Beginnings are important- I cannot stress this enough. The first 1-3 chapters can make or breaks a fic. It is what hooks the reader and gets them to keep reading, even when you take forever to update. Having said that, do keep in mind that I have yet to see a fic that has less than 1000 words for its first chapter be all that good. It’s sad when a new fic pops up and it has a pitiful 400 word count, basically a paragraph. I can guarantee you will not get much people to like your work. If you are going to make a fic, put effort into it. The standard size for a chapter is at least 2000 One may be able to get away with 1500 words however. There is no excuse for anything less than this. Throw the ol "IT'S A PROLOGUE!" rant all you want, the fact is, anything less than 1500 words is too short.

2. Formatting- don't make your readers eyes bleed by submitting a wall of text. Whenever a different character speaks, have their dialogue on a different line and be sure to use quotation marks. sometimes even when you do this, it's possible to make an overly large wall of text (after all you need to describe what that character is doing in that line as well). One must be careful to avoid that.

3. Think about your how your readers will view your work- by this I mean try not to put too many overly unrealistic things in your fics. You may say that since it is your fic you can do what ever you want but really sit down and think about that statement. It is not 100% true. All fiction no matter how outrageous, have some degree of realism in it. So doing things like over exaggerating the size of certain objects just makes the story sound silly. One example is on a fic that had the character with a 30-inch penis with it being a foot in girth...see what I mean. Or a fic I read where Naruto made a village with a 1000 foot high wall that was 300 feet thick. Details on this point will be explained below

4. Don’t let bad reviews get you down- statistically speaking, no matter how good your work may be SOMEONE has to hate it. If you are getting one bad review for every 30 good ones, you’re gold. If you have one good review for every 30 BAD reviews...that may warrant scarping it and starting over.

5. don't mind the over dramatic nit pickers- there are some people who nit pick over the simplest things and make them sound like they are a very big problem. This in turn causes the author to work super hard trying to please that one nitpicker. Then suddenly he may drop the story. In particular, people who nit picks over simple grammar errors can be ignored, unless of course the grammar is so bad it is hard to understand. People make a fuss about grammar as if it has to be perfect. It does not and everyone should give grammar a bit of leeway because lets face it no one is perfect. Sometimes you may use "there" instead of "their" and it's cool. We all have a marvelous thing called a brain, it basically auto corrects most simple errors. I know from experience that even if you triple check some error can still slip by. If someone points it out that's good, but just forget the fool who go " ZOH MY GOD YOU SO DUMB YOU USED THEIR INSTEAD OF THERE!! THAT'S THE BIG MISTAKE!"

6. Be original- this goes back rule number one. Some things in fanfics have been milked to death. one example is the old beginning of a lot of Naruto fanfics where ninja are fighting off the fox, forth hokage comes and seal it away, wishes for Naruto to be seen as a hero, third hokage takes Naruto to council, some call for his death, others call for him to be a weapon, third gets pissed and says Naruto will live a normal life and the chapter ends there. That is a VERY overused first chapter. Try to make something new. It doesn’t need to be completely original, just uncommon would be fine and for sure, you should try to avoid using too much canon. This is FANfiction, not retelling-stories-you already-know-fiction. If I wanted to read stuff that happened in canon, I would have read the manga or watch the anime.

7. Never use the excuse “its fantasy.” this is further explanation to # 3. To justify everything that goes on in your fic. Saying its fantasy, is not a valid excuse (yes excuse), to ignore reality.
Because Fantasy is based on reality. The fantasy world has the same rules as ours, plus the fantasy rules. In any media, the audience has a basic knowledge what’s fantasy But still have the rules of reality, like gravity, people get injured, etc.
In any media, if it’s in the fantasy genre, the medium (film, anime, literature, etc.), explains How it’s different from reality, early on. Be it a movie, a drama song, or a piece of literature, there is always an exposition, explanation, or foreshadowing, so the audience get the knowledge so they will believe it when the characters in said media start to use it.

If there is no prior knowledge of the things in your fantasy, the suspension of disbelief will be broken, and they will call it simply bullshit. Why? Because it comes out of nowhere. It surprises them in the wrong way. There was no build up to that point, no hints, nothing.
And that’s very bad. No author wants that their audience just stand up and leave. The authors need to keep the suspension of disbelief. And that can be kept by proper explanations. And that explanation needs to be inside that medium. Not from outside knowledge, or prior knowledge. Not from just a comment from the author, but inside it. There is no way around it. The only way around it if you create several works in one fantasy setting, and you already explained the rules of your world ones, but even then, it’s not recommended, because new readers won’t get it, and thus breaking the suspension of disbelief.

8. Understand the difference between written mediums and visual mediums- did you ever stop to think about how some things are funny when read off a manga or watched via anime, but fall completely flat when put in written text? That is what this point is about, a lot of writers have anime or manga on their minds when writing 100 the time and that can lead into problems. Take for example chapter one page 30 of freezing zero (seriously for the sake of explanation, look for it and see what I’m saying). It was an amusing little event. Now let me put that event into text and you tell me the difference. (Note I can’t remember their names so I’ll just use numbers)

Upon helping the fallen girl, she gently touched her head, feeling a large bump from the impact moments earlier, tears started to form in her eyes and soon she busted into tears.

“Waaaaaah!! Mommy I got a bump on my head now I can’t get married anymore!”

“We’re sorry!” girl 1 said trying to calm girl 0 down. ”We’ll take you to the infirmary!”

At this girl 0 suddenly stopped crying. “Eh? Where am I? Who am I?” She asked causing the other girls to panic. “Just kidding! I’m finesies!” She said, causing the other girls to fall over, feet in the air.

See the differences? Think carefully before you put something like this in your fic. This may fly in more childish stories, but in stories with a more serious tone, this can lead to some awkward moments.

Anime uses words in dialogues, but they are sounds, not written. It’s not the same thing when you hear a sentence, when you read the same sentence. It could mean two entirely different things. While the sound can give it a different meaning, depending how the person says that sentence, the same thing written is always the same.

And in anime showing things is a lot easier, because it's Visual accompanied by sounds. They do not need to be explained, the visuals does the work. However, the literature does not have this powerful tool. They need to write it down and explained to us to "show" it to use through words. And that is a lot harder. This is why Visual medium and written medium don't mix. They are too different, and use entirely different tools.
Replicating the visuals and sounds, in written format is very hard, and its building on mostly on the reader’s imagination, so they can image exactly that sound effect, or picture what the writer did write. But every man has a different imagination thus they will be different results in the readers mind.

TL;DR version, BE AS DESCRIPTIVE AS YOU CAN! You don't have the luxury of drawings to tell the actions of the story for you. here is a bad example:

Naruto punched Ichigo into a far away building and ran up and slammed a rasangan into him.

Here is a GOOD/DECENT Example:

Naruto punched Ichigo, the force so great, the earth crumbled beath his feet, sending ichigo's body tumbling at high speeds before colliding into a faraway building. Naruto was not far behind, using a clone, he formed a rasangan by the time he reached his opponent and slammed the shapr of rotating chakra into ichigo, causing him to grun in pain.

notice the difference? NEVER try to take the short route, try to explain as much as possible so the reader can get a better idea on what's going on. Also take not at how being descriptive adds A LOT more bulk to your story. it's more compelling and exciting, two things that are key to hooking your readers into your story;)

Another smaller point take note of is game mechanics in fics. This may just be my personal little nit pick, but it’s annoying when the writer uses the game mechanics of a game they are writing a fic on. Like FF 13 for example: “PARADIGM SHIFT: MEDIC!” again, it looks cool on the visual medium, looks simply stupid in a written one.

9. Letting you fic “marinade” before starting and after is good- By this I mean let the idea knock around in your head for a while. I suppose this goes along with the idea of planning. You have a basic idea of what you want your fic to be? You have a basic beginning, middle and end? Good! Now let the beginning middle and the end float around your head for a while, you may start build up on it, making to write something out. The marinating after a chapter is done has more to do with looking over your work. Here is something that happens A LOT. You finish your chapter, you look it over for grammar and spelling errors, then you post it. Hours later you get several reviews about errors and poorly worded sentences. Rather than simply finish the chapter and give it a once or twice over then post it, hold on to it for a while. I’ve personally finished chapters and did checks for errors and was sure they were error free. I come back and read it a day or two later to find a few problems here and there, fix them, and end up coming back a few days later to find more problems still. Mind you, at that point chances are what you’ll find are very minor problems but it’s still worth it to hold on to a chapter before posting it just to make sure.

10. Plan a basic outline for your fic- you notice something with a lot of the fics here? Like they would have 4 chapters or so (many of them VERY good i might add) yet they are abandoned due to writers block. The chances of this can be reduced by simply having a rough idea on the beginning, middle, and end. A lot of writers just have the beginning of a concept pop up in their heads and just start from there without a plan and end up dropping the fic.

11. How to tell if your story is bad- i view the system of reviews, likes and favs as a decent way of determining if your story is not good. why? because of statistics. as i've hinted at in #4, generally the number of faves and likes you get says that your story is decent. it doesn't need to be a huge amount, but if you're in a situation where your story has been posted, for days, weeks, even MONTHS and NO ONE has bothered to like, review, or fav it, something went wrong somewhere. if a story is good, it should have SOME likes within the first few hours (again statistics) no kind of feed back after weeks is normally NOT a good thing there are 2 reasons for this.

a. You started off bad- this goes hand in hand with #1. lets face it, when most of us post a story, it's to have our egos stroked. when you run off and make a short starting chapter and you don't see ANYONE like or fav it, you get deflated and never bother updating the story. those reviews, likes and favs really movivate you to continue because you know it's a measure of success.

b. What you're writing on- this has hardly anything to do with your skill as a writer. the simple fact is, if you make a story about an anime, or game that people hardly know anything about, or if it's just flat out weird, no one will really pay much attention to it. anime like naruto bleach and one piece have a huge fanbase who are constantly on the look out for stories where as more obscure anime may not have as many people checking it out.

12. Keep your plot and setting together- This may not be a story breaking problem, but i feel that it's worth pointing out. Picture this, you write a story with very good lore that has things like established history and laws. then you suddenly decide to fly in the face of everything you built up to that point by throwing in a plot twist that makes no sense. One example would be how Tobi is in fact obito in naruto. this is something i call bullshit on given all that we know the naruto universe. for the following:

we know ninja villages are protective of their bodies since they can hold secrets. knowing this, minato should have, by all rights looked for the body but he didn't even though an earth style jutsu could have easily moved the rubble on obito away so he could be found. there is simply no reason NOT to look for obito considering he was from the uchiha clan and his body would have no doubt bee HIGHLY sought after. imagine what enemy ninja could have done if they went behind minato and got to obito (assuming he didn't luck out his escape). obito's body would have been probed and it's even possible they could have gotten sperm from him to use to make their own sharingan users. All this when in the world of naruto, ninja have jutsu to destroy their own bodies if they are about to be captured, villages would have people who's sole perpose is to hunt down rouge elements and kill them and DESTROY their bodies on the spot. in the face of all the lore that was established up to that point, Obito, being left there by the man would would become hokage still screams bullshit in my opinion. however this plothole is very minor compared to some of the things i've seen people write over the years. just keep this in mind when you write.


Now on to some things to look out for in making crossovers:

1. Happenings in canon materiel - this is something that pisses me off to no end. Don’t let what's happened in canon dictate how YOUR story goes. I’ve seen such wonderful crossover die because of this. “Waa waa! There was this plot twist in canon now I can’t figure out what to do with my fic!” This is stupid on non-crossover fic yes, but even more so in crossovers. You are basically throwing a wildcard into the mix, meaning canon should no longer matter. This is why I believe one should have a basic PLAN before even starting a fic, not just dive in and wing it every single chapter.

2. Character replacement- replacing one character with another is completely and utterly pointless, most notably if you replace the main character. the whole point of a crossover is to make a “what if” scenario where you try putting another character from one world, and putting them in another to see how this unknown element would effect the world it was put in. you will NOT get much of an effect if you say, replace Naruto with ichgo. I’m sorry to say that I can't seem to think of how to put it properly into words (one of my many faults:( ) but rest assured when you replace one character for another you get a boring crossover. At least it normally is. There ARE some combos that can actually allow this to be pulled off, the writer would have to use his/her mind to determine which ones would work.

3. Crossovers are aimed at a very specific audience. Having said that, do NOT expect a massive amount of reviews. Yes there are some crossovers that have large amounts of positive reviews, but they are a bit on the rare side. In fact, take this tip with any fic you make even if it isn’t a crossover. You may not get many reviews, but keep a lookout in your email, see 1000 people adding your story to their favs and linking them? Profit!

4. Adjust Characters accordingly- again I’ll use Naruto and bleach as examples, Two shows that have crazy humor would clash horribly when put into a setting that is generally more serious like Harry Potter or mass effect. Dumb down over-bearing personalities when they are being put into a more realistic setting. Or, if you’re like me, you would just say “screw it.” and ax the over-bearing anime personality altogether. Which is sometimes the best course of action. The character from the happy go lucky anime world does NOT have to retain his or her attitude. Think about it, if Naruto and Mass effect are crossed over, what would make that so special? What would, at its core, be the driving factor in such a fic? Not the Character‘s anime personality, but it’s abilities, although this is only my personal opinion, but I believe a lot would agree with this. Sometimes, it’s best to just stay true to the core concepts of crossovers and just rework the character to fit the setting you’re putting him in.

5. Amount of characters- this also applies to normal fics but it goes double for Crossovers. Seriously, this may go by easier with more visual mediums like games and anime, but in text, it can be a pain in the ass. Nothing like when a story updates every 3 months and it has like 30 characters. Seriously how are people suppose to remember all these characters? Go back and try to find the chapter that introduced them? Big inconvenience to the reader. Not everyone is willing to run through like 10 chapters just to refresh their memory about who a character who has been absent for like 5 chapters (with massive delays between updates I might add). Proof of this would be what they did in mass effect 3. They reduced the number of characters to better focus on character development (and thus better story).
Sure, a lot of anime and books have a large cast of characters but think about it, you NEVER see the ENITRE cast. And the characters that do appear do so gradually. There are some authors who would make a fic with 20 characters and introduce them all at the same time, epic fail. There are actual steps to introducing characters.

a. You start of by with the main character and some of his closest pals who will stick with him through the entire story. These are the core characters that will ALWAYS be around. These core characters have a minor adventure together and through that adventure, the reader learns about their background.

B. after the above adventure, the main villain and his henchmen are introduced, over a period of time you learn about all of his henchmen.

c. Supporting cast- other guys are added slowly as the story progresses, some with history with the main villain, others for their own reasons

In all this, no more than a few characters are ever in to mix. Bleach is a perfect example of this. At first, you learn about ichigo and rukia, then orohime and chad, then ishida. After that, the captains are introduced and info is given about them, and for all the captains and lieutenants in bleach, note that only a HANDFUL were explained in detail at first. After that kisake and yurichi and a few others appear, each time a new set of characters pop up the focus is almost entirely on them so they can leave an impression. You will never forget any of the captains, espada, or the main cast because you learned about them one by one slowly, as opposed to listing them off ALL IN ONE CHAPTER with their basic info and they are also vital to the story in some way. Having a 20k word chapter introducing like 20 characters into the story at one time also ruins the flow of the story and I personally get bored after the first 3 guys. When executed properly, a character being introduced would be deeply integrated into the story as opposed to someone who is just dropped in there after a time skip or something. Here a simple guideline:

A. the main character ventures into a new area in search of something

B. the main character gets in trouble

C. main character is saved by someone.

D. that someone tags along to help the main character in his search for whatever reason you can think up

E. during that search you learn what drives that someone

F. search ends maybe with a heated battle, the one that saved the main character would, for what ever reason, decide to tag along with the main character for the rest of the story.

Now be honest with me. If you read, a fic that used the above guideline as opposed to a fic that hot drops a bunch of characters and give a lousy paragraph of info about them, which would leave a more lasting impression? I am more zealous about this point (as you can tell by its long windedness), because I find it to be one of the most glaring mistakes an author can make. It implies laziness, lack of creativity, and lack of patience. And what makes it painful for me……….is that I did it myself back when I use to write……epic fail.

6. Understand your source material- another reason crossovers sometimes fail is due to a lack of understanding of the universes being crossed over. Case in point, lets say you want to cross over bleach with a brand spanking new manga that only just came out a month ago………’ll fail. You would have an idea of the capacities of bleach (since is so far in development) but you would totally screw up when it comes to melding bleach with the new manga since there is no way you can fully understand exactly what that new manga is all about unless you totally make up something original, something I fully endorse but let’s face it, most authors don’t really want to wonder THAT far from the source material they are writing from. So think before you decide just haphazardly decide to put 2 crossovers together. Understand the details of the 2 stories.

There are all the tips I have for now. Remember these tips are to be used at YOUR discretion sometimes they can be applied in just about any fic but there will aways be exceptions. One last tip that will help out the most, more than any of the other tips I gave here: READ. READ READ READ READ! When I use to write fics, I started out bad, but I never really realized how bad since, well, no one ever told me there was anything wrong with my work. I lost interest in writing and just read. After a few months of really reading, I began to realize that the fic I made was actually sub-par at best. It may have had a good plot, but it was poorly executed. Many of the authors I’ve spoken with never really took a good look at what makes a great fic great. So when they run off and try to make a great fic of their own, they get very disappointed. Reading will help you understand what makes a good fic, you can then apply that to your own fic. Hell it even helps with your Grammar.

If you like writing fics, never let other people talk you down. No one is perfect, and even the best authors (the ones who are not pros in real life) started off bad. This is another thing that separates bad, good, and great authors, the drive to push on regardless of what others say. Accept the harsh criticism (even I will be harsh at times), you will learn from them, those are, in many ways, the best kind of criticism, since they are not coddling you into thinking you’re doing a great job. They may hurt your ego a bit but you WILL be a better author because of them. Learn to accept these reviews, what I or other real reviewers say may not even have to apply to that story right away, just remember it for any other works you may start. Don’t be a raving idiot that shouts “IT’S MY FIC I CAN DO WHAT EVER I WANT!” or a groveling suck up that tries to get the reviewer to change his mind.

That’s all I have. I hope anyone who happens who read this finds these tips useful. In addition, remember, there are exceptions to what I listed here, and these tips are mostly geared towards the more plot driven fics.

Currently in the process of re-editing these tips (finally). expect it to be a bit more refined in a few days.

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